David Kane

Please note; in terms of Theatre Seating, a row has been roped off in the balcony at *every* show during the week for XPass seating - not just for Chic nights as Suite Guests get. Presumably if more than a dozen people purchased the XPass there would be additional rows created - currently, exactly 1 couple ever occupied that row. The kiosk is lighted BTW and reserved until 3 minutes before showtime by red ropes and an attendant.

Day 7/Day 8 - Recovery and Departure We always dedicate Day 7 to recovery and slowly packing. Swimsuits are dried, clothes are folded and re-folded, and light meals are enjoyed. We began passing out our Thank You Cards and additional Tips on Wednesday to get ahead of the curve so we had less of that they we usually do - still, the day passed quickly as the last one always does and, with calm seas, we went to bed early to conclude our time. Today, we were up at 6:00am, had a quick turn at Luminae at 6:30am, and were in the Retreat Lounge at 7:29 - which was exactly the time the ship was cleared. We had utilized the Luggage Valet (best. service. ever.) for $29 per so all we had were carryons and were disembarked at 7:43 am. The last person to say goodbye to us was the Cruise Director Luigi who, as noted earlier, is absolutely redefining this role. A quick $30 ride to the Airport later (tip included) we were past Security and in the Lounge by 8:30am (we have...a later flight in the day, and as much as I want to hang out at the locally owned Mexican eatery for 6 hours I don't think I can possibly have that many Margaritas). With the ending of the trip I suspect I have a few questions to be answered and then a final post about thoughts on the B2B experience.

Day 6 - Activities There were a number of activities occurring throughout the day, which was nice to see as it was technically a 'Port' Day at Grand Cayman. They offered 3 holes of mini-golf: There was also Cornbowling; a combination of Cornhole and Candlepin bowling, which was a LOT of fun and whereby 'Tom from Nova Scotia, eh?' failed to place within the top 3. It is hard than it looks! From there we did our usual sail away from the Retreat Sundeck, dressed for dinner, which we once again had at the Sunset Bar - the tiny plates here are REALLY good: You might be asking why were are choosing very alternative venues for dining - the fact of the matter is that the food at Luminae is wonderful, beautifully served, and after 10 days of it we really just needed something far more basic. Back at home we have a sizable garden, cook most of our own food, and eat a lot of non-complex meals. At Luminae the dishes go a long way to challenge your palate but a very rich - so we elected to being moving back to more simple food a few days before we got evicted.

Day 6 Here are a few quick informational shots for Day 6, whereby we actually made it to the Captain's Club Breakfast. This is usually a sullen buffet but, on the Ascent, it is a seated affair in Le Grand Bistro! Definitely a nice touch:

Night 5 - Epic After another pool visit and some more Video recording we visited the Sunset Bar at 6pm for some very lite dinner. Remember that menu I posted way back that showed actual food being offered here? Yeah; it is REALLY good - granted, it costs a few dollars extra, much like Craft Social, but there are some unique middle-eastern themed bites here that a very interesting. After that, we dressed for dinner and hung out in the Retreat Lounge for a bit - after which we went to the World Class Bar where I packed anyway any number of Highlanders (one of the best drinks at this Bar that is still on the package). During this time XZ began to fade, but she, at least, caught the beginning of a whirlwind four hours. A rather young Dane was at the bar next to us, on this trip with her family to celebrate her brother's engagement. She had recently ended a relationship herself, and was looking to start another one right about....now, or, preferably, 2 hours prior. Unfortunately, no one had quite explained to her before onboarding that the many eligible bachelors on the average Celebrity cruise likely had the word's "One of the last surviving members of..." appended before their names as an honorific. As such, she was busy drowning her sorrows in a Premium Drinks package at the world class bar. Thusly, we established a secret confederacy, whereby I would pretend to be her brother and escort her about the ship, looking for anyone that seemed remotely single and somewhere under 30 - the pickings were...non-existent. However, drinks were had, drinks were almost spilled, and, at around 1 in the morning, she packed it off to bed and...I really should have gotten her name? I know it started with an "M" and was unpronounceably Danish. I did, however, see her and her family briefly the next night and wished her well on her continuing quest - once she got off of this ship. After that, I went back to the room and woke up XZ - we had a plan in place for months before that we were going to get up late right night and do some dramatic readings under the Octopus (see, you think the name "Ocho" for a sculpture of an Octopus may be generic, but the artist literally called it 'Metal Octopus' as well, which may be a great name for a Japanese Heavy Metal Band, but is even more generic than 'Ocho.' Thusly, when no one was on deck, we snuck up to Octo and did a few dramatic readings to be posted later - the lighting was fantastic, as expected!

Day 5 - Epoch As noted, this 'Live' Blog has pretty much fallen apart at this point - once we realized our time was finally dwindling down we spent a lot more time shooting Go Pro videos and relaxing - there is additional paperwork somewhere around here but we're in the airport now and I think we packed our paperwork binder in our checked baggage. Before we sum up our Back to Back with our final thoughts (and an interesting little secret for anyone who has made it this far) let's review the Epic Day that was the 5th one (at Sea). We have invented a new game! We very much enjoy spending time at all the bars and, last cruise, we bought a weird deck of playing cards from Mankind with a mixology theme. In the final 3 days we tried to get every bartender at every bar to pick and sign a card of their choice: For lunch, we snuck over to the Mast Grill. While it can be one heck of a wind tunnel on Sea Days, I think the offerings here are unreported on and under-utilized. Aside from Burgers, Hot Dogs and Fries there are a ton of fresh toppings, additional condiments, and a number of coffee, tea, juice and ice cream machines I never see used. I know similar items are available at OVC, but in terms of offered freebies (even if you don't have any type of package) this little station in the Mast Grill has a great selection and pretty much no line:

Day 4 - Cozumel After a run around the jogging track/gym visit, XZ decided to visit Cozumel. She was happy to report that days of Monkey Wranglers, Parakeet Provocateurs and other street 'artisans' with questionable animal handling skills are gone to be replaced by rather sedate scarf sellers and dress makers. We are also docked next to the Icon of the Seas, the current largest ship at sail and I have some news - if you weren't a fan of the Infinite Verandas on Celebrity then you're not going to be much of a fan of what is happening on the new RCI ships either as this behemoth is lousy with them around the middle: For lunchtime we had one of those little magical opportunities that makes Celebrity really stand out. We had been having fun with the gentleman who mans the Pizza Station seemingly 22 hours a day and he asked if he could make us a specialty pizza for lunch the next day - so nice of him! From there, we ran around the ship shooting video for several more hours - at last check I have something like 78 Videos to edit and upload 👀 which begins to explain to me why a lot of You Tube content is posted weeks or even months after a cruise - I can edit whenever I get the chance, but we only have the time on board to do our boring floor tours* After that, we stopped by Craft Social for a light bite - the Truffle Fries here may be the best on the ship: Note the dress - XZ got this in port and it is surprisingly good quality! Much better than anything at Forever 21, a store that describes to you plainly in the number of hours, after purchase, their clothing will hold together before literally coming apart at the seams. After this we attended sail away from the Retreat Pool/Hot Tubs and then dressed for dinner: We had some quick bites at Luminae and then attended the first half of Awaken. We had seen the show last week and the first half of it is excellent - right up until after the 'Stranger Things' scene, and contains numerous well-designed Magic Tricks that, even on the 2nd viewing, I am still uncertain exactly how they are pulling off. The last 3rd of the show gets a little wonky, so we did our best to be responsible and call it an early night. *It will likely take a few weeks to get everything up on YouTube, but we spent hours doing tours of cabin floors. I mean, everyone does a tour of the buffet - how many You Tubers do you know who walked all of decks 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, and 12?** **Believe it or not, not as boring as it sounds!

Day 4 - Paperwork Whelp, the cat is officially out of the bag and we have been evicted from the wonderful Ascent - as to not belabor this (ahem) 'Live' Blog anymore I will speed-date through our last 3 days on board - but first, let's do some paperwork:

And Now I am in the retreat lounge right now, 3 days in the future, listening to a guest dicker over their already included, pre-paid gratuities with the head butler who is trying desperately to politely define the detailed nuances of Celebrity's tipping policies and it reminds me that we have not heard from the Cat in awhile. So, in lieu of me throwing my travel mouse across the retreat, let's check in with someone else who likes to throw mice around: Yeah, not so much. Eden hosts very well attended events and I recommend guests arrive about 45 minutes before the 2nd cast shows. The walls and ceiling are white and green, but for those of you ever attended an institutionalized high school, they are nothing close to hideous or dismal. Unless you have ever been subjected to the style of "what was on sale last week and my or may not contain asbestos" tile that public schools in the greater Catskill area use to cover their floors ('Beware of the Slippery Green Terrazzo' - this joke is here for my Mom to come across**) you don't EVEN begin to talk about dismal, Kitty. **Dick Stickles was the principal of the Catskill High School in like 1981 and fond of mis-aphorisms (there is no more blood in this stone!). Anyhow, one morning after a particularly wet opening, he advised students to "Beware of the Slippery Green Terrazzo" which, of course, means tile. But as Catskill was a very different place in the early 80s, all the students were on the lookout for some dude nicknamed 'Slippery Terrazzo.'*** ***All of the above is absolutely true. Thanks for coming to my TedTalk. We now will resume our regularly scheduled Blog and not go into another story whereby my mother got hired to be a guidance counselor partially based on her marksmanship skills. ****Also true; the 70s were a wild time.

Day 3 - the End of Nothing After the CC celebration we went to lunch in Luminae which continues to impress. The offer a *double* patty Vegan burger if you let them know ahead of time that beats the brakes off of anything from the Mast Grill; and the Signature Burger remains as good as ever: From there, we went to the Casino to give our tribute to Neptune: As the ship was rocking and rolling all day. Speaking of which, 14 foot swells are a GREAT time to get in the pools - it's a lot of fun and if you're mildly affected by the motion it is a good way to counteract that. After battling the waves in the pool we had every intention to change for dinner...or change for the early show...or change for the Eden show...but we started watching Oppenheimer and it's like 4 hours long? And then we fell asleep.

Day 3 - And more nothing I have been trying to figure out where the time goes on a cruise as it seemingly rocks by and, occasionally, the days stretch on forever. As near as we can figure it I spend about 3 hours a day working on CC and 3 hours a day either getting ready to go swimming, going swimming or getting un-ready from swimming. From there we check off another 3 hours of meals and at some point we have sleep and unsleep and I spend an hour on the jogging track and oh my god that was 26 hours, wasn't it? Not really. but it sure feels like it. Add in bar time, shows, and the number of stairs we walk in a day (so, so many stairs) and I begin to see where the time goes. That said, on Day 3 we relaxed in the early morning having to recover from accidentally getting a leading role in the show the previous night. From there, we managed to rouse ourselves in time to attend the Captain's Club welcome aboard - an important event if you enjoy following all things cruise news. It kicked off with some light apps and free flowing cocktails, which means that every seat in the house was taken, I suggest getting to this event on time - you will see a line stretching from Eden to the Art Gallery as they keep entrance briefly closed but once it opens seats fill up quickly: If you wish to have any face time with the Officers, perhaps taking the opportunity to briefly note exceptional service by a staff member, now is the time - after the initial press there is a line of 27 officers available for your comments/praise. After everyone is seated is and least three rounds of drinks have gone around the Captain begins his welcome address. There was a time, that we remember from our first cruises, when the Captain was a clearly competent, no nonsense, terse and tight lipped Greek gentleman who grudgingly provided the latitude and longitude and, if you were lucky, the time and date. Then along captain Captain Alex who introduced things like 'personality' to the role - a huge leap forward. Now we arrive at the Captains Kafetzis' - the perfect blend of professionalism and personality. He opened the show and then welcomed up Cruise Director Luigi, announcing that he had been selected Employee of the...I don't know - Quarter? Year? Everything? because that is how genre-defining his brand of entertainment and engagement has become: After that, it was time to introduce the Top Cruiser on Board. We have a big heart for this ceremony as, for years, on the Summit, it was Mr. Albert, who essentially lived on the ship and, aside from winning this award something like 143 times in a row, was a very pleasant gentleman who we spent several cruises with and, from time to time, would escort to dinner. This go around they introduced a *double* Zenith 😳 power couple who had 7500+ points with Celebrity so; yeah - that's a thing! I will not post a photograph with these gentlemen as we try to make this blog as anonymous as possible but, suffice to say, if they are on your cruise and you have some time to speak with them they have some amazing anecdotes about their last...98? or something cruises with Celebrity. To end the show, they have one of the professional wrestlers/acrobats/back-up security officers* perform a short set form one on the shows: And then, because of course, 19 minutes after winning Employee of the Everything, Luigi is back in the Grand Foyer teaching a Latin Dance class: *The last part is not true - the actual Security Officers are unsmiling professional assassins who all wear the same name tag, are from an undisclosed country, and, as we learned on the bridge tour, aren't allowed firearms on board so presumably are deadly knife fighters/retired UFC competitors. I know we've all seen videos from 'other' cruise lines about guests behaving badly and the staff having to deal with them and I feel that there is a clear reason why no one gets out of line on Celebrity...** **That said, 7 years ago we saw a guest become unbalanced on the gangway and somehow fall over the railing between the ship and the pier and 1.3 seconds later a security guard dove in after him and single handedly dragged him to safety.

Another Quick Reply @lynncarol We have had two items on our must do list; a Back to Back and a TransAtlantic. We eschewed the TA because we enjoy these ships the most when no one else is on it - aka Port Days, and, by nature, *everyone* is onboard the Trans-Atlantics (well, I do hear that certain guests do get occasionally invited to a Shore Excursion, but it's the Mid-Atlantic and no one has to keep those kinds of stats in international waters) so we elected for the B2B. The advantages are as follows: A) You get a closer relationship with your fellow B2B cruisers. We don't use names on this blog, but we have a met a number of wonderful folks we otherwise would not have over these 2 weeks - if we did it again, we would 'host' an informal B2B meet-up one day via the Community Board. B) You have a more consistent view of the staff and become more recognizable around the ship. For a group of people who see 3000 different folks each week they have an uncanny ability to memorize your drink/room number in about 3 days - when you're onboard for 2 weeks everything becomes almost automatic - I haven't reached for my card once this week (ok, once, because we moved one room over and as hilarious as it would be to have the people in the room next to us see 17 free drinks appear on their folio as all Skys have the Premium we are far too honest to do that) and everyone knows your name - like Cheers but with a slightly Serbian accent. C) You only have to unpack ONCE. Huge win. You don't realize how much of your onboarding day is spent fiddling with luggage, negotiating drawer space with your SO, rearranging the bathroom shelves for the 3rd time. Once you know where everything is and you don't have to move a thing (again, most B2Bs are same cabin - we just missed it by 1 Celebrity Website click) you gain 3 hours, at least. D) The Retreat Host organized the turnaround so tightly we were back in our room by 9:43am - you quite literally have the entire ship to yourself for about 2 hours, give or take. A great time to get some good pictures and or video that capture the magnitude of this size of ship with no a person on it (except for some weirdo dealing double-handed-single-player Canasta in front of the coffee shoppe...we expect they were an officer's wife? Or I imagined it. 50/50 on that). E) You get to see the full loop of destinations and menus (which are usually designed for 14 days) before they repeat. F) You have no pressure at ALL during your first week to see or do anything. Last week, XZ and I would look at each, shrug, and be like "next week" and then order another glass of wine. I think that about sums it up* *The wonderful person we met said one thing that scared me. She goes "well, you know how if you cruise for a week, by Thursday you already start missing it and by Friday, when your luggage tags arrive, you're kind of sad? Well, when you're on for two weeks you still get the same feeling at the end of week two. So then I stayed on for three weeks, and then for four weeks and suddenly you have to have friends check on your house and make sure the garden is watered because you're on board for a month..." So yeah, apparently, nothing removes those end if cruise blues.

Day 3 - Dailies and Nothings As noted, one of our favorite cruise shirts says "what day is it?" and I am rapidly losing track of reliable time out here. So, let's do some paperwork to get back on track:

Quick Answers Ok, only 1 day behind! And not a lot happened on Tuesday, so let us answer a few questions; as follows: A) OH! In the background of the picture @Jim_Iain has it right; those are coasters. Every cruise, since the beginning 10 years ago, I make sets of commemorative leather coasters to hand out to the crew along with their tip envelopes. This go around I got a touch ambitious and made a good 20 to distribute. I figure, aside from chocolate and liquor, you really don't want to give the crew anything they can't readily take with them and magnets, for me, are just too impersonal. So, about a month ahead, I create sets of coasters to distribute to the staff - small enough to discard if they don't care for them but easily packable in case they do! B) @Sheal - on our first leg we jumped ahead to 'Atlantic Time' when we neared Puerto Rico and boy howdy did that throw us for a loop - in Airplane Mode none of your devices pick up your location and you have to set everything 1 hour ahead manually - super exciting when you brought 4 pocket watches on board. You drop back on day 7, which is nice for the extra hour of sleep before eviction day, but still disorienting. The good news is that there is a USB charged room phone now that displays the correct time at all time. The bad news is that a) it takes up a precious USB charging slot, so you will likely immediately unplug it and b) it glows the the true cross at night and so you will throw a towel over it at 2am or throw it across the room at 3.

Day 2 - Bridges and Shimmerbox(ing) Day What to say here - the set dressing for this show is awesome. The actors, when given space and license to show off their skills, are, once again, are top notch. And then whomever writes these things at Full Sail University got up one morning totally hungover, realized they had to deliver a show for rehearsal that day, typed "Music, lyrics and images that involve bridges" into Chat GPT and just printed out whatever the AI created. There is exactly one scene in this show that is awesome - the Brooklyn Bridge montage. I would sit through the first 28 minutes just to get to this one scene, because, dancing and singing to modern music, it shows what this cast is truly capable of - it is awe inspiring. ALSO; the show "opens" to a 3 minute 40 second empty set where nothing happens because predictive AI thought "engage the audience immediately to draw them into the show" was way too avant garde. After AI Bridges I went to the World Class Bar while XZ caught a nap. Somehow there is a smoked rosemary drink here called 'the Highlander' (there can be only one!) that is on the premium drinks package (the only smoked drink that still is) and is excellent. We normally don't report on crew happenings, but the main bartender, who got married by Captain Kate of all people, is taking a much needed vacation in 3 days. Sorry future Ascent cruisers, the best of the best is going home - at least for now. The good news is that the next ones in line seem primed for the top spot. After rousing XZ we headed to Eden to see Shimmer Box(ing) Day - the late night show that celebrates everything about uncelebrated American Holidays. Normally, one needs to get to Eden about an hour ahead of the show; and if you want a seat the bar, about an hour and a half before. Oddly enough, THE best seat in the house was available at the bar immediately upon walking in: SPOILER ALERT If you do not want to know the secret of Shimmerbox, please skip onto the dailies post for tomorrow Ok, so, originally, the Eden shows were off the charts - they had cast, essentially, Shakespearean characters and had them interact with the audience. Due to cultural and generational differences, most of the audience, unsurprisingly, did not want to find themselves responsible for killing, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern or Taming a Shrew. The forced audience participation was pulled way back in favor of a 2nd hand-balancing act. Post COVID, it seems they are adding a few elements back in - more encouraged audience participation, than 'surprise!' you're in the show. To have a high chance of being 'selected' sit at the bar. Or, as I did, inadvertently sit at the bar and mistake the champagne you ordered for the prop champagne glass the actors use to toast with - ooops. From there, the show gets WILD. I don't want to compare casts as I feel it is unfair. The main stage cast is constrained by Chat GPT and the Eden cast just gets to go buck wild with the audience but IF I had to highlight one area, the Eden cast has an acrobat who weighs about 78 lbs. (that's 49 meters for you Euro types) (no it isn't) and who I think can actually fly. Like, when the world radically shifts and superpowers or aliens or whatever are proved to be a thing, find this person - they might be our only hope. (and then....we went to bed).