Quiet Cruise Activities?

Could you tell me how you are legally married, but then you say "...in my state my marriage is technically only common law....".........and what specific state(s) are you discussing......

We are in Texas. Common law marriage in Texas only requires that we agree to be married, live together as a married couple, and that we have referred to ourselves as married to others. (Added bonus, we file our taxes together.) In Texas, even informal marriages require a divorce or annulment. Technically, divorce is really only necessary in this instance if there is property or such to divide. Because we file taxes together, it is all the more likely that we would need an official divorce. Even more so if he and our wife wanted to legally marry after.

We are in Texas. Common law marriage in Texas only requires that we agree to be married, live together as a married couple, and that we have referred to ourselves as married to others......In Texas, even informal marriages require a divorce or annulment.

Fascinating!

I don't want to discount your fears, but I'd like to suggest going in to this with an open mind. I believe you stated that the goal of the trip is a celebration. If you go on the ship with the expectation you are going to have a terrible time, that's what will happen. I'm not huge on crowds either, but I love cruising. And I cruised on the Valor a couple of years ago (before it moved to Galveston).

Here's what I do:

1. I eat most meals in the MDR, when I can. Its usually not as crowded as the buffet, plus its a "nicer" experience.

2. Since you are concerned about crowds, alert Special Needs. The reason for this is that the muster drill (required) on the Valor is outside, where you do your best impression of a sardine. I have a bad back, and when I was approaching the muster, the attendant saw I was walking a bit weird (I was a bit sore after traveling) he sent me inside to the lounge where all the handicapped/young children in strollers/etc where meeting. Contact Special Needs so that you can get permission to go there. You will be able to sit down in comfort.

3. When we go to shows, we try to sit towards the back, that way we can escape easily. However, the shows on the Valor at the time didn't require that. The show room is like any standard theater on land.

4. While I enjoy them, you may want to avoid the comedy shows. They are held in the back of the ship in a lounge that will be filled up. The atmosphere is that of a comedy club, where its "round" booths with tables. But, you will be expected to share a booth with other people to fill the room (no more than 8 people total from what I remember, could be less). Once the seating is full, other chairs may be moved in, and people tend to stand around the back.

5. If you can, try not to get to the ship until later on embarkation day. Cabins will be open at 1:30 (or so). You will easily avoid the crowds in the terminal and pretty much "walk right on the ship". Plus, once cabins are open, the crowds in the buffet tend to disperse so you should easily be able to get some lunch. Avoid Guys and the Blue Iguana on day 1. They will always have lines. Go on a port day when most people are off of the ship.

6. Hopefully, you guys have a balcony. On our trip, I booked an L shaped cabin (though I think the maximum capacity of those is 2), but it had a great balcony that I spent time on. I like listening to the sound of the ocean. I find it peaceful. Plus was a great place to put my headphones on and do some reading.

7. You mentioned that you exercise. There is a gym on the Valor. Use it. I have found that most ships gyms are comparable to most gyms back on land (though not as big). If you don't go first thing in the morning, it shouldn't be too crowded.

8. I previously suggested booking a spa treatment. Do it. We always book a couples hot stone massage, plus my wife usually gets her hair done as well as a mani/pedi. Its her treat since she doesn't go at home (her choice).

Those are just some of my suggestions. Again, trying not to discount your fears, just trying to make some suggestions so you can try to enjoy the trip.

FWIW, we found the library (not card/game room) to be very quiet. We were on the Norwegian Pearl and there was a inside lounge at the top of the ship that had seats close to windows and we spend a lot of time there watching the ocean. It did sometimes get loud as there were a lot of families not appeared to have never heard of "inside voice" but we usually managed to move and find a quieter spot. They sometimes had entertainment there and then we'd go find another spot. I spend a lot of time walking on the promenade deck (holding my breath as I walked by the smoking areas) and except for shuffle board area it was usually pretty quiet. Casino was smoky even when not open, just walking through, so with asthma you will want to avoid.

Study the floor plans of the ship before you go and see if you can spot some out of the way places. Ask on the forum for the cruise line you are on for suggestions of quiet areas.

Good luck, I hope you enjoy the cruise more than you think you will.

Thank you all! My wife insisted on a balcony, so we do have that. We're also set to be one of the last groups to board the ship. (I don't trust that we'll leave the house at the time we're planning and my wife has to stop and pee every three blocks. I'm planning for it to take us about five hours for a three hour drive.)

Based on everyone's suggestions, I'm making a list of things to do, like the library, and things to avoid, like the casino and comedy shows. My wife is trying to veto me bringing my books because they'll weigh me down and take up too much space in my bag, but I'm not bringing much else with me. I've traveled enough before to know what I'll need, even if I've never done a cruise. I imagine she also doesn't want me just reading the entire cruise. I'm thinking about taking some pastels with me to sketch sunrises since I'm the first one of my trio awake in the morning and they aren't likely to rise until close to noon or even after. I might try a mani/pedi... and maybe something for my hair.

Sorry, but I am not following. You are agoraphobic and you are going on a cruise? Is this a desensitization process? If so, I wouldn't advise it. People everywhere and you could be miles from any medical facility.

It's your mental health. Cruises aren't for everyone. Why just not go?

If you do go, avoid lunch in buffet on embarkation day. It gives everyone anxiety. Good luck!

At the risk of seeming completely insensitive I am wondering if this thread (specifically the OP) is for real. If so, you have one very sick (mentally ill) "puppy" with a husband to match. Between the mental health issues (enough to keep 2 psychiatrists busy) plus the husbands attitude this sounds like the narrative for a very sick reality show.

Hank

Thank you all! My wife insisted on a balcony, so we do have that. We're also set to be one of the last groups to board the ship. (I don't trust that we'll leave the house at the time we're planning and my wife has to stop and pee every three blocks. I'm planning for it to take us about five hours for a three hour drive.)

Based on everyone's suggestions, I'm making a list of things to do, like the library, and things to avoid, like the casino and comedy shows. My wife is trying to veto me bringing my books because they'll weigh me down and take up too much space in my bag, but I'm not bringing much else with me. I've traveled enough before to know what I'll need, even if I've never done a cruise. I imagine she also doesn't want me just reading the entire cruise. I'm thinking about taking some pastels with me to sketch sunrises since I'm the first one of my trio awake in the morning and they aren't likely to rise until close to noon or even after. I might try a mani/pedi... and maybe something for my hair.

That's the spirit. Definitely bring your books. My favorite past time on the ship is sitting on my balcony reading. Maybe get a Kindle instead? Of course I start reading, but usually don't get very far before I start snoozing :)

While this isn't your ideal vacation, you are trying to make the best out of it. Remember, it wasn't bought as a punishment :) Just don't go in being all disappointed and you should have an OK time. Who knows, maybe you'll even enjoy yourself to want to book another one.

I was just talking with a friend who cruises a lot.

She does not like crowds or noise. And she does not like confined spaces, even elevators can give her pause.

But she loves cruising. Now, she does prefer the smaller ships.

But she has found that there are always quiet places. When one place starts to get crowded, she can find an uncrowded space. So she just moves around during the day.

Now she typically cruises on the same ship, so she has her routine down. But it shows you can get away from people and have a good time being quiet.

if you are not ON BOARD 90 minutes before the cruise is scheduled to depart, you will NOT be sailing. not arriving at the terminal, not in line to check in ON BOARD.

in other words if it really does take you 5-6 hours to get there, you need to factor that in to your start time and pray to whatever deity you believe in there are zero delays.

I will say this again, if you truly are for real, you have one effed up relationship and I am sorry, but your spouses are selfish bastards who do not love you.

Thank you all! My wife insisted on a balcony, so we do have that. We're also set to be one of the last groups to board the ship. (I don't trust that we'll leave the house at the time we're planning and my wife has to stop and pee every three blocks. I'm planning for it to take us about five hours for a three hour drive.)

Based on everyone's suggestions, I'm making a list of things to do, like the library, and things to avoid, like the casino and comedy shows. My wife is trying to veto me bringing my books because they'll weigh me down and take up too much space in my bag, but I'm not bringing much else with me. I've traveled enough before to know what I'll need, even if I've never done a cruise. I imagine she also doesn't want me just reading the entire cruise. I'm thinking about taking some pastels with me to sketch sunrises since I'm the first one of my trio awake in the morning and they aren't likely to rise until close to noon or even after. I might try a mani/pedi... and maybe something for my hair.

Look whether your library offers ebooks. Mine does. Can get an inexpensive e reader (not a kindle) and load it with library books. Small and lightweight but probably more books than you can read in a week.

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If you have a tablet, you can download reader apps.

When I carried my Sony eReader, I had over 1000 books on it. Enough for a VERY long cruise. :)

I keep a few hundred on my tablet.

if you have an Android phone you can download the Kindle app on your phone and read on it. Then you dont have to carry an extra device. I have a lot of books on mine.

i think the iphone has a book reader you can download.

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There is a Kindle app for iOS also. I use it for books I can only get from Amazon.

Most ebooks are in ePub form, and there are a number of reader apps. I use Marvin on my iPad.

Not trying to be mean, but I think you need therapy if you truly have these issues.