Night of the Living Drunks: Our 2017 Halloween cruise aboard the Carnival Dream!

"When witches go riding, and black cats are seen, the moon laughs and whispers 'tis near Halloween'." -Abraham Lincoln (Or somebody, I'm too lazy to look it up.)

 

Ladies and gentlemen, just as promised, Watermelonqueen99 is back with another review! This time, it's a full picture review of our Western Caribbean cruise aboard the Carnival Dream that left NOLA on 10/29/17. I wrote a review of our cruise on the Freedom earlier this year, and I really enjoyed doing it. I won't link to it, because I'm not into contributing to delinquency (that's a lie, it's actually a hobby of mine), but it's on here if you wanna search for it. (Disclaimer: If you're easily offended, your last name is Duggar, or you're currently on medication, I don't recommend it.) Because Photoshop now wants to charge me to host my pictures, and that money could go toward alcohol, Botox, or scratch-off tickets at the gas station, only the text remains. But it's worth a read if you're planning on sailing on the Freedom, or if you want to lower your IQ by a few points. To begin, I will give you a little overview of who we are, my writing style, and what we do and don't do when we cruise, then I'll get started with the actual review. I have 595 pictures (I don't even have that many pictures of my 2 children combined) that are uploading that I have to sort through, so please be patient with me. I copy/pasted this intro from my Freedom review (because I didn't have to put my drink down to type a new one), and just modified it a little:

 

Hey, girl, hey! We are T (me) and C (him). We met in 1998 in college, and married the next year. We are late 30's, and we own our own business that allows us a lot of flexibility. We first started cruising in April 2014 for our 15th wedding anniversary, got completely hooked, and this cruise on the Dream was #8 for us. We cruise 2-3 times a year. We are currently Gold (actually, it's more of a mustard yellow color ), and looking forward to that Platinum card, mostly so that we can get our draws washed for free and we don't have to keep going to the Deck 2 laundry room like mere pheasants. We'll only be lowly Gold card members for 2 more cruises, thankfully. We are loyal to Carnival, and are very laid-back and easy to please. We have a 15 year old son and an 11 year old daughter, but we do not cruise with them. We do, however, take them to Disney World every summer. (Our bank account just dropped by $6K when I typed that. Reaching for Xanax/Vodka cocktail.) On the ship, we are very social, very friendly, and love to make new friends. During the day, you'll find us around the ship playing cards, people watching, day drinking, wasting money at the casino, or getting wind blown on one the lower, quieter decks. At night, you'll find us at our favorite bar, hanging out with our favorite bartenders and new friends we've met. We don't go to any of the shows, comedy or otherwise. We don't go to dinner in the MDR. (We prefer the classy ambiance of Guy's Burger Joint and/or the Lido buffet.) We do not cruise without the Cheers package, and we make full use of it, no shame. (15 drinks? Honey, that's not a limit, that's a goal.)

 

Also, for this review, I wanted to throw in a little known fact about myself: I'm an athlete. Okay, I'm being a little modest here, I'm actually an Olympic athlete who has won several gold medals. Here is a pic of me and a fellow Olympian after our last competition:

 

 

My mama was so proud of me that day. I had been training since I was 16 years old. Anyway, now that my little secret is out, let's talk about my writing. If you're not familiar with my review style, consider yourself lucky. It's not appropriate for women, children, small animals, men of the cloth, virgins, people who wear sweater vests, or really anybody with any decency or intelligence. If you're still here after reading that, shame on you. Also, we should be friends.

 

This was our second time on the Dream and our second time doing this itinerary (sort of, we had to miss Grand Cayman on our first cruise). The pictures will include the ship, food, drinks, what we did in port, screenshots of the FunTimes and more. I took lots of notes, so I may get a little long-winded. (Which is nothing new.) My reviews are far from serious, but I also try to make them informative. My review will be chronological, and will include the good, the bad, and the ugly. Although we do love Carnival, we are also critical when something doesn't live up to the standard we're used to. Like I said, I'm still sorting through the pictures, and I also have a little bit of writer's block (translation: I'm still hungover from the last night of the cruise), so bear with me as I prepare to write this mess for you. I should be here with a full installment tomorrow evening. So feel free to put on that nice track suit you've been saving for your cousin's third wedding, crack open a wine cooler that expired 2 years ago, and join me as I relive our week aboard the Carnival Dream.

Let's "be friends"! I'm from Tulsa and you sound like my kind of person!!

Thanks for the review.

What has been your favorite part of the review?

I love your style! God I hope we cruise together someday!! I'm sure we'd be best friends and quite possibly quarantined in our cabins with guards stationed outside the door!

Holy cow, I am laughing so hard! Can't wait to read the rest!

Glad I could make you laugh! :D Thanks for reading!

I love your style! God I hope we cruise together someday!! I'm sure we'd be best friends and quite possibly quarantined in our cabins with guards stationed outside the door!

Me too! Sounds like the watermelonqueen needs to organize a fan cruise! :)

Excellent review and C and I are similar in our love for that stupid quarter machine, and my husband thinks I'm as ridiculous as I'm sure you think he is for it haha

He also loves the one where you try to fit the key thingy into the slot. Lol Thanks for reading!

This picture says "cruise" to me.:D I'm enjoying your review - thanks for sharing your cruise with us.

Obviously you're someone who appreciates fine art! :D Thanks for reading!

Let's "be friends"! I'm from Tulsa and you sound like my kind of person!!

Howdy neighbor! :D Thanks for reading!

What has been your favorite part of the review?

For some reason, I really hope they don't answer your question. :'):'):')

I love your style! God I hope we cruise together someday!! I'm sure we'd be best friends and quite possibly quarantined in our cabins with guards stationed outside the door!

That sounds fun! :'):'):') Thanks for reading!

Me too! Sounds like the watermelonqueen needs to organize a fan cruise! :)

They would have to pull a cargo ship behind us to store the extra alcohol we would need, and hire 3 times more security staff! :'):'):')

Lawd, I hope these FunTimes help someone, because trying to get them cropped, organized, and uploaded has been a bitch. I'm actually looking into taking up hard drugs because of it. Sheesh.

Anyway, here they are, the FunTimes for the first sea day:

To be continued in next post.....

To be continued in next post....

To be continued in next post....

Lawd, I hope these FunTimes help someone, because trying to get them cropped, organized, and uploaded has been a bitch. I'm actually looking into taking up hard drugs because of it. Sheesh.

 

Next time just open up the paper fun times all the way and take a picture front and back. Two pictures per day...much easier than what you're dealing with.

Next time just open up the paper fun times all the way and take a picture front and back. Two pictures per day...much easier than what you're dealing with.

Tried that last time, and you couldn't read them in the pics.

Tried that last time, and you couldn't read them in the pics.

Well you did something wrong then. Use the tapatalk app to attach the pics and choose the highest resolution.

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

That's all for the FunTimes from this day. Stay tuned for our second sea day, which was Halloween!

Sea day brunch?

Sea day brunch?

I'm not sure why it's not showing on the FunTimes.

I'll be back tomorrow with a new installment! :D

I just looked back through my review and realized that a lot of my pictures are no longer showing up. I have no idea why. :mad::mad::mad: I'm gonna try to post another installment, but if the pics don't show up, I'm just gonna have to give up on writing this review. UGH.

Tip: When you are rudely awakened on a Saturday morning by a knock on your door, and you look through the peephole to see it's Mormons, grab a butcher knife, smear some ketchup on it, and open the door. Then proceed to turn around, yell "get your ass back in the basement," then turn back to the Mormons and say "how can I help you"? They will leave immediately.

Anyway, let's get on with this review.

Tuesday, October 31st, Sea Day #2:

I was super excited for this day, this is why we booked this cruise to begin with. I am basically the grown-up Wednesday Addams, and Halloween is my favorite holiday. We woke up somewhat early-ish, and against our better judgement, (not that we ever use good judgement) we decided to have breakfast on Lido. Breakfast on Lido makes a sausage biscuit from McDonald's taste like something prepared by one of the world's finest chefs. The bacon, as usual, was floppier than an old man's (okay, I won't go there, it's too early in the day), and the hash browns (if you can call them that) were ice cold. They had some cheese slices available that even a rat would look at and say "oh hell naw." But, we had one helluva view:

As I scanned through the FunTimes on the Hub app, I was so disappointed. There weren't really any daytime Halloween activities planned. A pumpkin carving demonstration and Halloween trivia, that's it. We walked around the ship and snapped some pics of the decorations:

To be continued.....