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Dining - for me the most difficult part of soloing


Winchester Ranger
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So let me start by saying I have only done one solo cruise - transatlantic on QM2 for 8 amazing days and I feel a need to share some of my experiences about what, for me, is the trickiest part of solo cruising - dining.

 

So I went into the buffet area only once and ran into an elderly Irish gentleman who was sailing solo - his experience of the cruise was very bad, he referred to the Queen Mary as a "glorified ferry" and I actually felt sorry for him because I think that one of the reasons he wasn't enjoying himself was because he was eating all his meals in the unpleasant rattle and clatter of the buffet area. As for me, I took all of my evening meals in the MDR which is the Brittania Restaurant on QM2, and this being Cunard the dress code was either formal or ultra formal which definitely changes your experience for the better (in my opinion). I opted for an 8 seater table and can clearly recall sitting there anxiously on the first night waiting for my tablemates (as I had arrived first). First up was Barbara, a blonde 69 year old retired flight attendant, Barbara was quite frankly stunning - and at 69 !! She was also marvellous company, next up was David a very quiet, shy entrepeneur and farmer - another super guy to dine with. From there however things began to take a turn for the worse - there was an English guy who rolled up halfway drunk and very loud with a martini in hand, a Scottish couple complete with a wife who felt it her business to ask the most personal questions and then offer unsolicited life advice - this may not sound too terrible until I add that she figured out that the loud English guy was in fact gay, and offered to provide him with certain services of an intimate nature that would "cure him" - all this with her husband sat listening in bemused silence - I suspect that this was not his first rodeo as the saying goes. Then there was a shady character from Germany who claimed to be writing a book about entrepreneurs and a very loud party girl who loved to shout out obscenties much to the consternation of our fellow diners at other tables. I became firm friends with Barbara and David, but reached the point on cruise day 3 that I was dreading dinner even as I sat munching on breakfast and realized that I had to act, so I saw the Maitre d' and switched tables - and my new tablemates were all wonderful company even though I was the only solo at their table apart from one of the guest speakers - the famous Maureen Ryan.

 

I say all this because I had considered doing what the elderly Irish gentleman had done - dining alone in the buffet, but I pushed myself into the company of others even though I am by nature quite reserved - and quite honestly the experience completely made the cruise for me because I still find myself thinking of the people I met all these months later.

 

One other small story that I add for no other reason than the fact that it comes to mind as I type. While I did take afternoon tea with the aforementioned Barbara on at least one occasion, I did also choose to take it alone in the crowded Queens Room on at least one other. I took a book along with me for company and sat there quite contented as I gulped down gallons of tea and half a dozen cucumber and egg sandwiches. I noticed a lady sat at the table next to me and the poor thing had a terribly disfigured face. She seemed to be looking around trying to catch someone's attention for company - as a fellow solo my heart went out to her and I invited her to sit with me which she did without saying a word. It turned out that the person behind that face was so wonderfully kind and polite, and I choked up a little when she thanked me so profusely for sitting with her. I think of her often.

 

So for my summary of solo dining - well, as Thomas Edison so famously said - opportunity is missed by most people because it arrives in overalls and looks like work. Well solo dining is a little bit like that - yes there is the possibility that you could end up sat at a table of unpleasant characters, but if you are willing to work at it you can, and will, find some great company onboard, and the absolute worst thing you can do is hide away from view. If you want to be assured of solo company the transatlantic voyages are a sure thing, as they are used by many as a means of traveling, not cruising.

 

Hope you enjoyed my ramble, I think it's some type of therapy because I'm ready for another cruise.

Edited by Winchester Ranger
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Thank you for sharing your thoughts and experience. My fear when sailing solo is being placed at a table with unpleasant passengers. You are right. One should not hide away because wonderful experiences will be missed along with the horrible ones.

Solo cruising is not for everyone. For me , it beats not cruising at all.

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I think it's important for solo cruisers to carefully study the dining options on the ships they are considering, and to choose one that they feel comfortable with.

 

I've cruised most on NCL, and they work for me because they always allow solos to to dine alone in any of their restaurants (except the buffet or teppanyaki). I would not choose a ship that only allowed "traditional" dining in their MDR. But that's just me...everyone must make their own informed choice.

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I've cruised most on NCL, and they work for me because they always allow solos to to dine alone in any of their restaurants (except the buffet or teppanyaki). I would not choose a ship that only allowed "traditional" dining in their MDR. But that's just me...everyone must make their own informed choice.

 

What do mean you can dine along at any restaurant EXCEPT buffet and japanese place? I can't imagine you could not dine alone at the buffet? And why not the teppanyaki? That sounds bit unfair to me?

 

As well I don't think there are any shows that ONLY allow traditional dining in the MDR - most ships as mentioned have buffets, specialty dining and other restaurants so one would not be forced into a traditional dining situation if it was not one's preference?

 

I too have cruised solo and usually ask for a large table (more likely to find one or two 'compatible types') typically seated with many solos and a few couples and have always had a very nice time....even if there are a few 'characters' at the table LOL - makes for a more interesting dinner and great stories when you get home.

 

However I always tell fellow solo cruisers to ask for a different table if you are NOT HAPPY! - you should never have to have a bad time on your vacation or be forced into dining at the buffet if that is not your choice!!!

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Hope you enjoyed my ramble, I think it's some type of therapy because I'm ready for another cruise.

 

Thanks for sharing. Your ramble was very eloquent. I disagree with most of it, because we're different people looking for different things on our cruises. But you make many valid points that may be of value to others.

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What do mean you can dine along at any restaurant EXCEPT buffet and japanese place? I can't imagine you could not dine alone at the buffet? And why not the teppanyaki? That sounds bit unfair to me?

 

What I should have said is that you aren't guaranteed of getting a table ALL TO YOURSELF in either the buffet or the Japanese place. However, you can get table all to yourself in any of NCL's other restaurants.

 

And I also note that although many ships have a variety of restaurants, I would not choose a ship that didn't allow me a table to myself in the "no surcharge" MDR. In other words, I don't think I should have to pay more to dine alone, given that (as solo cruiser) I am basically paying for two in the first place. ;-)

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Thanks for the post. Sailed solo for the first time at Christmas and had anytime dining. First time in the MDR When I got to the head of the queue no one wanted to share a table so I stood there for a while. Eventually 3 couples were persuaded to share but they all seemed to only want to interact with the other couples. One gentleman didn't even want to sit next to me and made his wife swap seats... Way to make a girl feel good! After that uncomfortable meal I stuck to the buffet. Hopefully I'll have a different experience on my Christmas HAL cruise - there must be some people up for a chat, surely?

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We often sit AT the bar with those cruising solo. They are social people because they at sitting AT the bar rather than a table.

They've often told us their big problem was going to specialty restaurants where they didn't have the option to sit with others.

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So let me start by saying I have only done one solo cruise - transatlantic on QM2 for 8 amazing days and I feel a need to share some of my experiences about what, for me, is the trickiest part of solo cruising - dining.

 

Hope you enjoyed my ramble, I think it's some type of therapy because I'm ready for another cruise.

 

Winchester Ranger - This post for solo dining is EXACTLY what I needed to read tonight so thank you! I will sail this Saturday on my first solo cruise. It was originally planned with three other friends/family, but because of a last minute crisis, they cannot sail. I thought about cancelling the cruise, but the more I thought about it, I have decided to sail alone.

 

This will be my 26th cruise, and though I am very comfortable chatting up passengers in the public areas, I have never dined in the MDR alone.

 

Based on your post here, I definitely am going to hold my head up high (and swallow hard) and go to my MDR dinner solo. It may not work out with table, but I also could make some new friends. It would be worse if I did not go and always wondered "what if".

 

Your Benjamin Franklin quote is PERFECT:

 

Opportunity is missed by most people because it arrives in overalls and looks like work.

 

Thanks for posting your message here at exactly the time I needed it. I will post my MDR-solo experience when I return.

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I agree. Dining as a solo cruiser is an adventure. I learned my lesson on my last cruise and I will not use anytime dining again. I will ask for the table size I prefer and change if needed.

I met some interesting people but it was hard to change table mates and location every night. One character I was seated with twice was a gentleman that dressed very casual even on formal evenings and thought we would be impressed by the amount he could eat and drink. He kept the severs jumping by demanding more of everything.

I did meet two people that cruise a lot and don't have a full time home. One does house sitting and camping and the other flips houses and lives in the house they are working on at the time. Very interesting.

I did feel like the odd man out waiting to go into the dining room with no one to chat with so I will now have my table and my dining friends.

 

4boysnana

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Thanks Winchester Ranger for the 'ramble'. It wasn't rambling and gave a good reason for me to reconsider my dining 'plan'. Other cruises have been in groups or with one companion. After some less than enjoyable experiences, I planned to choose anytime dining and sitting by myself - I have no qualms about doing so. The cruise is for R & R so having to slog through a dinner trying to play nice with unpleasant table mates is not what I think of as relaxing, but I may try to branch out and ask to join the occasional table. I will strive to attend the first night solo meet and greet, and the second night solo traveller dinner table, but after that - no promises, but I will keep my options open.

By the way, your T Edison quote is my new email signature. :)

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So far out of the 4 or 5 solo cruises I have taken I have had very good luck with table mates.

 

I became a solo cruiser when everyone in my party canceled their cruises at last minute except one couple, who informed me that they had changed their dinner reservation to a different table and dinning room just before dinner. I was quite angry with them, but after my first dinner I realized what a favor they did me. My table mates were a retired minister, his wife, a retired constitutional lawyer and several other retired folks all around the age of 80. Anyway they were a hoot and so interesting. The minister ended up having breakfast with me every morning because his "women folk liked to sleep in" and the lawyer and I took turns buying the shot of the day at dinner every night and split a couple of bottles of wine. I believe they were best table mates I have ever had.

 

One other memorable trip I did anytime dining(never again), I met a nice young lady and we ended up paling around most of the cruise and went to dinner together every night and ended up having different table mates every night. We pretended we were a couple off on a secret cruise, when the photographer would come to take our pictures at dinner we would refuse by saying "my wife would kill me if she saw a photo of us together" we got some strange looks... NOTE we were both single.

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I opted for MyTime Dining for my first RCI cruise on Brilliance. It was OK, but I do prefer to share with the same people every night.

 

I've met some very interesting and friendly people while sharing in the MDR.

 

I didn't enjoy NCL Jade as they don't fill tables like other cruise lines. Sometimes I did have to eat on my own. Fortunately I found Epic considerably better.

 

I started another thread on my experience on Ovation. I think I was just unlucky and it was difficult to change tables on a short cruise.

 

I think my preference will be for smaller ships in future.

 

 

I agree. Dining as a solo cruiser is an adventure. I learned my lesson on my last cruise and I will not use anytime dining again. I will ask for the table size I prefer and change if needed.

I met some interesting people but it was hard to change table mates and location every night. One character I was seated with twice was a gentleman that dressed very casual even on formal evenings and thought we would be impressed by the amount he could eat and drink. He kept the severs jumping by demanding more of everything.

I did meet two people that cruise a lot and don't have a full time home. One does house sitting and camping and the other flips houses and lives in the house they are working on at the time. Very interesting.

I did feel like the odd man out waiting to go into the dining room with no one to chat with so I will now have my table and my dining friends.

 

4boysnana

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I guess I'm weird in that I LIKE dining on my own.

 

I'm hoping that having made reservations for MTD for the same time every night I can get a table to myself in the same section with the same servers and not be the leftover at any random table.

 

 

If you're weird, I am too. I find small talk with most strangers (and waiters, for that matter) exhausting.

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Thanks for the post. Sailed solo for the first time at Christmas and had anytime dining. First time in the MDR When I got to the head of the queue no one wanted to share a table so I stood there for a while. Eventually 3 couples were persuaded to share but they all seemed to only want to interact with the other couples. One gentleman didn't even want to sit next to me and made his wife swap seats... Way to make a girl feel good! After that uncomfortable meal I stuck to the buffet. Hopefully I'll have a different experience on my Christmas HAL cruise - there must be some people up for a chat, surely?

 

Your story is my fear. Three solo cruises and I've never eaten in the MDR. I know everyone says they put solos together but I really don't think there are other solos. I never see anyone else alone. I feel like people look at me weird for being alone. I would hate to be seated with a family and feel like I'm intruding on their dinner.

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After experimenting on my first solo cruises, I found that traditional works best for me. So much easier to have the same tablemates every night. That way I only have to explain once that I am traveling solo by choice. I have only had to ask to change tables once. There was a lady at my table who thought dinner conversation consisted of describing the various lizards, birds and mice her cat brought to her. Yuck.

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I did find it a bit uncomfortable going to the MDR when I first started sailing solo, but now it really doesn't bother me at all. I don't like dinner in the MDR that much because it takes too long, but I usually enjoy the experience when I go. I normally sail on Princess and I've sailed solo on HAL and Celebrity, too. I always do anytime dining and ask for a share table. Most often I eat at the buffet. Once in a while I eat at a specialty restaurant. The only thing that I don't like about eating solo in the MDR (with anytime dining) is that I have to tell my story every night. I actually enjoy lunch and breakfast in MDR more than dinner, although I rarely make it to breakfast. It's more casual and doesn't take a long time. I've only been seated with another solo cruiser a couple times. I don't seek out other solo cruisers. I don't really seek out other people's company, but I have met and remained friends with some really wonderful people.

 

If you want to meet people on the ship, I suggest you join the roll call and be active in the activities. Volunteer to organize an activity. Some are wonderful and some are a bust, but it's an opportunity to meet people before you get on the ship. I meet up with people and it's nice to see a few smiling faces that you recognize throughout the cruise. I never expect anyone to want to spend their vacation time with me, but I have ended up meeting some pretty great people through the roll call.

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I did find it a bit uncomfortable going to the MDR when I first started sailing solo, but now it really doesn't bother me at all. I don't like dinner in the MDR that much because it takes too long, but I usually enjoy the experience when I go. I normally sail on Princess and I've sailed solo on HAL and Celebrity, too. I always do anytime dining and ask for a share table. Most often I eat at the buffet. Once in a while I eat at a specialty restaurant. The only thing that I don't like about eating solo in the MDR (with anytime dining) is that I have to tell my story every night. I actually enjoy lunch and breakfast in MDR more than dinner, although I rarely make it to breakfast. It's more casual and doesn't take a long time. I've only been seated with another solo cruiser a couple times. I don't seek out other solo cruisers. I don't really seek out other people's company, but I have met and remained friends with some really wonderful people.

 

If you want to meet people on the ship, I suggest you join the roll call and be active in the activities. Volunteer to organize an activity. Some are wonderful and some are a bust, but it's an opportunity to meet people before you get on the ship. I meet up with people and it's nice to see a few smiling faces that you recognize throughout the cruise. I never expect anyone to want to spend their vacation time with me, but I have ended up meeting some pretty great people through the roll call.

 

The problem with roll calls is they all tell you to join a facebook group. I don't necessarily want everyone on facebook to know my vacation plans.

Edited by Saint Greg
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The problem with roll calls is they all tell you to join a facebook group. I don't necessarily want everyone on facebook to know my vacation plans.

 

I don't do Facebook at all......so joining anything on there? No thanks.

 

And I think it depends on the Roll call.....I have met plenty of people

on my roll calls over the years without going on Facebook.

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I don't do Facebook at all......so joining anything on there? No thanks.

 

 

 

And I think it depends on the Roll call.....I have met plenty of people

 

on my roll calls over the years without going on Facebook.

 

 

Ok. I've signed up on all of my roll call threads but it seemed like as far as activities and things they've been planned on a Facebook group. I have a Facebook account but I don't use it. It's just out there because a couple of old friends use Facebook messaging as their primary way of communicating.

 

Heck carnival is closing down their message board and going to just Facebook for questions/comments/planning. So all of your Facebook friends get to see all the details of your vacation planning. I told them fortunately there are much better cruise forums out there!

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Ok. I've signed up on all of my roll call threads but it seemed like as far as activities and things they've been planned on a Facebook group. I have a Facebook account but I don't use it. It's just out there because a couple of old friends use Facebook messaging as their primary way of communicating.

 

Heck carnival is closing down their message board and going to just Facebook for questions/comments/planning. So all of your Facebook friends get to see all the details of your vacation planning. I told them fortunately there are much better cruise forums out there!

 

Hi:) sorry your roll calls seem to only have FB folks on them. I am surprised

you can't meet folks through Cruise Critic....as for Carnival and what they

are doing? I guess they have enough passengers who do FB and it doesn't

matter to them if you don't....:rolleyes:

 

I use Cruise Critic for cruising;)

Edited by Lois R
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Your story is my fear. Three solo cruises and I've never eaten in the MDR. I know everyone says they put solos together but I really don't think there are other solos. I never see anyone else alone. I feel like people look at me weird for being alone. I would hate to be seated with a family and feel like I'm intruding on their dinner.

 

I almost always eat in the MDR. I've mostly been reasonably lucky with my tablemates. There were a few solos on Voyager in 2012 and we met up on the CC roll call, so got our agents to link reservations. I've been seated with couples a few times and we've got on well. I much prefer the formality of eating in the MDR.

 

Please don't think that people are judging you for being a solo traveller. A lot of people have expressed admiration that some of us do travel alone. I don't think we're 'brave', I just think we're living our lives to the full.

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Hi:) sorry your roll calls seem to only have FB folks on them. I am surprised

you can't meet folks through Cruise Critic....as for Carnival and what they

are doing? I guess they have enough passengers who do FB and it doesn't

matter to them if you don't....:rolleyes:

 

I use Cruise Critic for cruising;)

 

Carnival says they are just changing with the times. I don't see why they can't have both. I will never put my all the details of my vacation planning on social media. Speculation is they are doing it to save money. There's a 30 page thread on it over there...mostly upset people. Hopefully they make their way over here. I only had 30 posts there in 2 years but particularly when I was planning my first cruise it was nice to have 2 places to check for information.

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Ok. I've signed up on all of my roll call threads but it seemed like as far as activities and things they've been planned on a Facebook group. I have a Facebook account but I don't use it. It's just out there because a couple of old friends use Facebook messaging as their primary way of communicating.

 

Heck carnival is closing down their message board and going to just Facebook for questions/comments/planning. So all of your Facebook friends get to see all the details of your vacation planning. I told them fortunately there are much better cruise forums out there!

I am not a big Facebook user but I am pretty sure that groups and regular 'friends' don't see each other. If this is a group that you join for your Roll Call, your regular FB friends won't see what is being planned. Ask a friend, relative, or any 15 year old in your neighbourhood and they most likely can set you straight.

However if they all want you to 'friend', then your life is an open book.

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