Help with fat DH

[mountainmare]

After looking at pictures from our last cruise and finding myself out of breath I decided that it was time to face the scale and do something to get fit and healthy. My DH is a sweetheart, but for the past 2 years when he buys me clothes he would buy a medium instead of large to "encourage" me. Well it worked but now it is time for him to face the music.

 

He is on his feet at work, but doesn't move. At home he flips back in the recliner and watches TV. He is on blood pressure meds, and when I suggest that a little bit of exercise would at least decrease the amount of meds he doesn't believe me.

 

I have the walk away the pounds tapes (including the 15min 1 mile walk) and he refuses to even do those. When we do go out and walk he just strolls along which does not get his heart rate up.

 

I love him dearly and we were both well on the way to a heart attack. What can I do to get him up and moving??

[momthecruisedirector]

How about phrasing it that you need his help to keep yourself motivated. We just started walking together 2 months ago, started with walking 1/2 mile to the track, 2 laps around and home. We now are walking between 3 - 5 miles a day. Have him go to the doctor to check his blood pressure - maybe that will be incentive. Otherwise - take care of you, you know you can't control anyone else, nor could they force you to take care of yourself until YOU were ready.

 

I've lost 35 pounds since February from cutting back on calories and walking each day, I've got 100 to go. My husband has lost 102 since January - nothing could have been more incentive than my being bigger than my husband!

[Boo's Mom]

mountainmare... it's so hard.

 

It really has to be him....or it will only be temporary.

 

How about setting a goal together....let's each lose 20 pounds...and then we can book another cruise?

 

Focus on eating healthier. Fruit pops....instead of icecream.

 

Tiny, baby steps.....

 

Good luck. :)

[Boo's Mom]

momthecruisedirector.....

 

1. I love your CC name !

 

2. Wow...great results. You go girl ! I don't know you...but I am proud of you ! :p

[momthecruisedirector]

Boo's mom,

 

Thanks on both. I kind of felt the name fit after planning vacations that could make EVERYONE happy.

 

I am very happy about the weight loss - though with so much too lose it doesn't seem noticable yet except that my clothes are very loose and I feel better. We are cruising to Alaska this summer and I was hoping to feel like I'd have the 'wow' factor when I got the formal pictures done ('wow' from myself) but decided to be okay that my 'coming out' with the new me will more likely be at Christmas. Does that make sense????? Anyway, thanks for the kind words. I've dieted so many times that this time I've tried to keep quiet about it to friends, they've heard it so many times before and I usually don't make it past 10 to 20 pounds. Sometimes I feel like I'm busting at the seems to tell someone - which beats busting at the seams because my clothes are too tight!

[adoptmom]

Boo's mom,

 

Thanks on both. I kind of felt the name fit after planning vacations that could make EVERYONE happy.

 

I am very happy about the weight loss - though with so much too lose it doesn't seem noticable yet except that my clothes are very loose and I feel better. We are cruising to Alaska this summer and I was hoping to feel like I'd have the 'wow' factor when I got the formal pictures done ('wow' from myself) but decided to be okay that my 'coming out' with the new me will more likely be at Christmas. Does that make sense????? Anyway, thanks for the kind words. I've dieted so many times that this time I've tried to keep quiet about it to friends, they've heard it so many times before and I usually don't make it past 10 to 20 pounds. Sometimes I feel like I'm busting at the seems to tell someone - which beats busting at the seams because my clothes are too tight!

 

Well, you're certainly doing great! It just takes patience which is something I'm pretty short on these days. :rolleyes:

 

Mountainmare- My DH isn't too overweight, but has a family history of high blood pressure, diabetis and cancer. He also had high BP in the past although since we got married and I started cooking for him (almost 17 years ago :eek: ) his BP has stayed in the normal range. When we got married the ony veggies he would eat were corn and canned greenbeans. Now he eats a much broader range including broccoli, beets, salad, and even some winter squashes. I also don't do canned veggies except tomatoes and chickpeas. My most recent triumph with him was to get him to eat real fish instead of fish sticks. So I am willing to give him kudos for making huge strides HOWEVER he is DRIVING ME CRAZY lately! :mad:

 

He keeps bringing things like full sugar premium ice cream and crappy white bread into the house. He complains because he is overweight (about 30 pounds) and tired all the time but then he brings in that junk! The worst part is that I'm really trying to raise kids with better eating habits than we had as kids and that doesn't include constant access to the nutritional wasteland. DS will go through half a loaf of bread a day and he's not getting anything for it except paste. He might as well be eating school glue! It's also hard on my youngest DD because with her food allergies they're eating alot of stuff that she can't eat.

 

So, while I don't know what the answer is to your issue with your DH, I can certainly commiserate!

 

Tami

[Belle]

What's hard is to have a husband who doesn't have a weight problem.

Can eat ANYTHING! Brings things into the house and you have to keep

away from them! In all fairness he does buy special things for me to but

you know sometimes the other stuff calls you by NAME!

[adoptmom]

Belle- I know what you mean! I can stay away from the bread but ice cream calls my name and the low carb stuff just isn't quite the same. We had a habit every night as kids of having a big bowl of ice cream before bed. (No wonder we're fat!) That's been hard to break. I've been trying to do yogurt instead. I make my own and then usually flavor it by adding some macadamia-cashew butter I get from Trader Joes.

 

Tami

[mountainmare]

Basically I already knew that the answer is that when he is ready to do something about the fitness he will. I'm pretty lucky because his idea of snacks are veggies and dip (no I'm not kidding) but his downfall is gallons of Mt Dew.

He loves meat and veggies so he hasn't complained about the lack of white food. He just fixes himself a piece of bread. I can't complain about the diet, its the total couch potato thing that is driving me crazy. I just want to kick in the TV and burn the remote!!!!

Everytime he's flipped back in the recliner watching me do my tapes he tells me how much he admires my perseverance, maybe if he has trouble enjoying Paris(the ultimate walking town) that will be a wake up call. I'm hoping to convince him to go to Boston (another walking town) as a dry run.

[adoptmom]

Mountainmare- Have you tried convincing him to try diet Mountain Dew or at least do half and half? I understand though, I used to be addicted to the stuff when I had to drive for a living. Fortunately I grew up with living with my Grandparents and the only softdrink I got was TAB. :p Other than Mountain Dew (especially the cherry) I can't stand sugared sodas so making the switch was easy. Plus now I can't handle all the caffeine.

 

I'd pick one battle at a time though and try to make inroads there. I think Boston would be fabulous though if you're getting our weather from the past few days you might want to wait a while! It was freezing!

 

Tami

[WeirdEyes]

What's hard is to have a husband who doesn't have a weight problem.

Can eat ANYTHING! Brings things into the house and you have to keep

away from them! In all fairness he does buy special things for me to but

you know sometimes the other stuff calls you by NAME!

Belle ~ I know exactly what you mean! :eek:

[Livestotravel]

Hi Mountainmare - it's Pat from the great Panama Canal Cruise. Just as others have said, he has to want to - my DH's incentive came from the shock of being weighed at the doctor's office, and oh, yeah, when our 3 year old granddaughter asked him if he was having a baby! Whoops! Anyway, we are on our second week of South Beach, and it's working well so far. We have a 5-day cruise coming up - RCI's Voyager to Bermuda at the end of May, so that will be a challenge. Anyway - good luck to both of you - you definitely will want to be fit for walking in Paris, it's perfect for it.

[gerif]

My DH has COPD emphysema and asthma, so exercise is difficult for him. However, last year he signed up at a place called CUTS which is a franchise chain pretty much directed at the out-of-shape older guy who isn't really geared for a regular gym. It's a 30 minute circuit of various exercise machines - some of which he can't do because of his condition (oh, he's 64 BTW). Without changing his (horrendous) eating habits at all, he has lost 30 lbs. in the past year (he wasn't really fat to begin with, but had quite a gut). They even featured him on their advertising video.

 

Is there something like this in your area? Perhaps a gift certificate?

[adoptmom]

Geri- That sounds like Curves for men! That's great though.

 

Tami

[Wennfred]

Hi, one thing you can do and you dont need to workout is Cutting out the Sugars, I mean no Pasta, Potatos, Breads, Rice, Sugars. try this for 2 weeks flat and he will loose big time. This alone will fire up his Energy since the energy will only come from his body fat meaning continuous energy. You will notice after 4 days he will jump out of his recliner and start doing things around the house. Make sure you read the book first and control all of his meals, keep him full and happy.

 

Read Dr. Atkins' New Diet Revolution, it pretty much saved me butt.

the book cost only $2.47 used on Amazon.com, not a bad price for a lifetime

of health.

 

Good luck and take care.

[Belle]

How is your husband doing..or not?

[mountainmare]

He got out the rowing machine and sometimes around the 11'o clock news I hear the swish of exercise happening. I think that you were all correct, I stopped nagging and just continued to follow my WOE and exercise plan. I don't cook a special meal for him, but he loves veggies and salad he just takes a slice of bread with his meal (instead of two or three). I also have heard the sounds of him checking his weight on the scale.

It is a personal life decision to get healthy. It was only this week that I actually told him that I had weighed 183 and was really putting my life in jeopardy. He is not too overweight, I am concerned about cardio health and the belly fat (as we all know thats the bad kind). After the age of 55 neither one of us will ever be as buff as we were in our 30s, we just want to enjoy life for a long time.

 

Thank you for asking

 

Linda

[Susky]

There's always the shock approach. Start asking him things about the family finances, and when he asks why, tell him you need to start planning for your life after he passes. :eek:

[gerif]

Geri- That sounds like Curves for men! That's great though.

 

Tami

 

Yes, the owner said that's exactly what he based it on - and they tend to open in areas where there is already a CURVES.

[IndianaCruisers]

Husbands

 

What's hard is to have a husband who doesn't have a weight problem.

 

Can eat ANYTHING! Brings things into the house and you have to keep

away from them! In all fairness he does buy special things for me to but

you know sometimes the other stuff calls you by NAME!

 

When I quoted right. The opening should be spouses. I weigh in about 300 pounnds and am trying to lose weight (down from an all time high of 325). I know all the rules diet (less caloric intake) and exercise. Eat right. Stay away from certain food items. Having a partner helps. All those things, but my wife is about 120 pounds including ice cream or popcorc nightly and all the chocolate she wants. Not upset with her, just very envious. HArd to lose without tons of support.

 

It is not just husbands, but spouses. No I don,t mean to flame you just stating that both sexes can be quilty of this.

 

Let's continue to lose.

 

dan