Mentally handicapped

[Kitten112]

My brother who is 36 is mentally handicapped and has the mentality of a 5 year old. He is super polite and very nice. He sometimes talks loud and loves talking to everyone! Does anyone have any experience with ncl staff and how they talk with people like my brother. Sometimes when we go out people stare or say rude things like “you should put a leash on him” or parents shuffle their children away. He likes to do what 5 year olds do, slides swim etc. I am just worried how people will treat him.

 

 

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[GeezerCouple]

My brother who is 36 is mentally handicapped and has the mentality of a 5 year old. He is super polite and very nice. He sometimes talks loud and loves talking to everyone! Does anyone have any experience with ncl staff and how they talk with people like my brother. Sometimes when we go out people stare or say rude things like “you should put a leash on him” or parents shuffle their children away. He likes to do what 5 year olds do, slides swim etc. I am just worried how people will treat him.

 

 

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You might also ask this on the NCL sub-forum part of CC, although this is probably the best place for general information about this.

 

I'd suggest contacting the Special Needs department of the cruiseline. This may not be the most common disability, but it's something they should be able to help with, if nothing other than perhaps preparing the onboard staff to watch for him. I would think it would help most people to be prepared rather than interact inappropriately for a short time before they realize that it isn't a "regular" situation.

(Perhaps they could assign more "sensitive" staff, such as the steward, or a butler if you have a suite. Or maybe assist with service in restaurants, etc. When we traveled with an 18 month old, early in the cruise, we had an amazing waitress, and we just asked to always be seated with her. She would spot us coming, and have a bowl of spaghetti with butter placed in front of him in about 10 seconds, or so it seemed. We "noticed" her, because the second time she saw us, she *remembered* what he liked the first time, and pro-actively asked if she could get him some of this "right away". Yes, we tipped her! She made dinner for us a pleasure, and made it much nicer for other diners nearby and for herself also, of course!)

 

Other than that, I'd assume that there would likely be at least some times similar to what you experience elsewhere. The big difference is that you aren't "home" much of the time, although you'll certainly have privacy in your cabin or suite.

 

What type of accommodations will you have?

Has he ever cruised before?

Do you do non-cruise travel with him? Do you have any special planning that has been helpful, or any special difficulties, other than more frequently encounter others who aren't accustomed to his situation?

 

I can't believe one of the "comments" you've reported. Unbelievable!

 

GC

[Kitten112]

You might also ask this on the NCL sub-forum part of CC, although this is probably the best place for general information about this.

 

 

 

I'd suggest contacting the Special Needs department of the cruiseline. This may not be the most common disability, but it's something they should be able to help with, if nothing other than perhaps preparing the onboard staff to watch for him. I would think it would help most people to be prepared rather than interact inappropriately for a short time before they realize that it isn't a "regular" situation.

 

(Perhaps they could assign more "sensitive" staff, such as the steward, or a butler if you have a suite. Or maybe assist with service in restaurants, etc. When we traveled with an 18 month old, early in the cruise, we had an amazing waitress, and we just asked to always be seated with her. She would spot us coming, and have a bowl of spaghetti with butter placed in front of him in about 10 seconds, or so it seemed. We "noticed" her, because the second time she saw us, she *remembered* what he liked the first time, and pro-actively asked if she could get him some of this "right away". Yes, we tipped her! She made dinner for us a pleasure, and made it much nicer for other diners nearby and for herself also, of course!)

 

 

 

Other than that, I'd assume that there would likely be at least some times similar to what you experience elsewhere. The big difference is that you aren't "home" much of the time, although you'll certainly have privacy in your cabin or suite.

 

 

 

What type of accommodations will you have?

 

Has he ever cruised before?

 

Do you do non-cruise travel with him? Do you have any special planning that has been helpful, or any special difficulties, other than more frequently encounter others who aren't accustomed to his situation?

 

 

 

I can't believe one of the "comments" you've reported. Unbelievable!

 

 

 

GC

 

 

 

Thank you for letting me know about the special needs department. I didn’t even know they have one. My brother is going to be staying in a room with my mom. They have a balcony room. He has been on two cruises. (Both with my mom). One on Viking where mom said everyone was super nice. And the other on ncl in Hawaii. She said the staff in Hawaii was very weary of my brother. He looks like a “normal” 36y/o but when you talk with him and watch the way he acts you know he is different. She said she didn’t like the way people would look when he would get excited over something! He is hyperactive.

Thanks for all the helpful info!!

 

 

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[GeezerCouple]

Thank you for letting me know about the special needs department. I didn’t even know they have one. My brother is going to be staying in a room with my mom. They have a balcony room. He has been on two cruises. (Both with my mom). One on Viking where mom said everyone was super nice. And the other on ncl in Hawaii. She said the staff in Hawaii was very weary of my brother. He looks like a “normal” 36y/o but when you talk with him and watch the way he acts you know he is different. She said she didn’t like the way people would look when he would get excited over something! He is hyperactive.

Thanks for all the helpful info!!

 

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There might also be differences among the cruise lines, in terms of general competence of the staff, but that's no guarantee.

Ditto the others who are on board. Fewer children to get upset, for example, if that's a common problem or such.

 

Good luck. Hope you enjoy the trip(s) :)

 

GC

[Bloodgem]

She said she didn’t like the way people would look when he would get excited over something!

I have a 27 year old severely disable DS who is confined to a wheelchair. We have done 11 cruises with RCI and on every cruise at least 2-3 people stare at my son. Your mum will just have to get use to it, like we did. When a person has stared at my son longer that we feel comfortable with either myself or my mum will go up to the person and say "take a picture it lasts longer" the starer soon looks away.

Unfortunately in life you will always find people who have not come across disabled people, like your brother and my son, before and don't know how to react to seeing them of the first time. It is exactly the same on cruise ships. :(

[TickledBlue]

My brother who is 36 is mentally handicapped and has the mentality of a 5 year old. He is super polite and very nice. He sometimes talks loud and loves talking to everyone! Does anyone have any experience with ncl staff and how they talk with people like my brother. Sometimes when we go out people stare or say rude things like “you should put a leash on him” or parents shuffle their children away. He likes to do what 5 year olds do, slides swim etc. I am just worried how people will treat him.

 

 

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We have an autistic son that we are taking on a cruise that is quiet and keeps to himself but he has house-mates that act similar to your brother. We've encountered people like your brother and we are fully cognizant of the challenges (and rewards) of caring for such individuals. Our son is similar in that he likes to do what 5 year olds do as well and requires constant supervision even though he's 25 years old.

 

I'm curious as well about the behavior of NCL staff towards our son since we are taking him on his first cruise in a month. Hopefully, they are trained to know how to react to 'special' people. Worse case, we'll get the same reactions as the general public, some kind and some not-so-kind. At this point (and I'm sure your are at this point as well), you already know how to deal with the not-so-kind reactions.

[spookwife]

one thing you will have to keep foremost in your mind is that for liability reasons, they will only treat him according to his physical age, NOT his mental one. that means if he is in the pool and starts getting overstimulated, you may have to remove him for the safety of everyone else in the pool( they are not big enough for swimming, most adults are only going to reasonably be able to stand around or sit on the edge) Slides( assuming you mean the regular slides and not the kiddie ones) he will have to go down alone.

 

as for 'sensitive' staff: they are not going to reassign anyone. you will get whoever is assigned your cabin already.

 

as for passengers: you cannot expect anyone/everyone to automatically know what the deal is, or how to respond to any actions or observations in a way that you approve of. in other words, people will stare, they will be rude and they will be uncomfortable with any interaction with him. it is not a matter of them being terrible people without compassion. most will not have a clue as to what is the 'correct' way to respond or react.

 

on Royal, I would have suggested you go see the Kids club counselors on the first day and inquire about getting age appropriate toys for him to play with in the cabin or an unused area of the ship like the card room. not sure if Norwegian would be similar.

[TVLady3]

My son is 44 years old and has Down Syndrome. He has been on 54 cruises with me, 37 of those on NCL. I have found the staff on NCL very caring and understanding to my sons wants an needs.

Tell Mom not to worry, he's in good hands with The NCL's staff.

 

 

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[NorthernLite]

NCL in Hawaii is a totally different, and ruder, animal than the rest of NCL. Talk to Special Needs/Services and you might ask about a cruise card that is colored or coded so well meaning bartenders do not serve him more than sodas.