Completely terrified of doing another solo cruise.

[KBS1607]

I would second the advice to join activities. I met people by playing trivia. 

[Markanddonna]

18 hours ago, Itchy&Scratchy said:

then you'd miss out on talking to me... 🙂 I can talk for hours and I love it, whereas my hubs won't talk at all. Just because we are sitting together doesn't mean none of us will talk. My DH has had to drag me away from other people many times....

I'm sure you and I would get along just fine.  I am an early riser and go down for coffee to watch the sun rise. I find that the buffet is filled with mostly old guys who love to strike up a conversation and chat. Of course, I have an interest in military history which leads to many interesting conversations. Sort of an unusual characteristic for a retired woman.

[Suzieanna]

When I first read the initial post I thought “how silly”!   But when I think about it.. if you are not outgoing it is really difficult to start a convo with a stranger  It’s probably similar to thinking ... what do you mean you can’t swim?   Just get in the water, spin your arms and kick yer legs!    Then that water splashes you in the eye so you get scared and get out of the pool as quickly as you can!

 

i was shy until I was given one little gem of advice.  Don’t worry about what people think of you..    because the irony is they are only worrying about what you think of them!!! Do your own thing first and make sure you are interesting to yourself 

 

you want a friend... ? get down early to get a good seat at the quiz or the show.  people will want to join you.   Go to the dance lesson.  Sit at the bar with a soda.  Smile at people.   Say I like your dress...  if you see them again say Hi, another lovely outfit!   

 

 

[CruiserEK]

I must admit I have been afraid to do a solo cruise myself. I was quite hesitant and missed out on some good deals with little to no single supplement. I finally decided to take a local 2 day cruise that is coming up next week to see for myself whether or not I will even begin to like cruising single. I have spent the last 18+ years cruising with friends and/or family. I can say that I have spent enough time with others and alone to know what to expect. In most cases for me the more you put yourself out there and get noticed you will tend to find that there are more than enough people willing to talk to you and hang out with you. Some of the best times I have had being on a cruise was when I would loosen up and participate in the activities offered on the ship.  I still like to spend a little bit of time on my own either eating breakfast/lunch outside near the pool, lounging at a pool when it is less crowded and/or without loud music,  and relaxing at the ship's spa (the ones that have the thermal suite).

[payitforward]

I can understand your upset and frustration, but the truth is it has to start with you. The negative attitude and lack of self-confidence came through in your writing, so I can only imagine it came through even stronger in person. People don't want to reach out and spend their vacation with someone who is angry or depressed. They want to spend time with people who are happy, confident, and will add to their experience as opposed to detracting from it.

 

Back in my younger and single days, I could always tell what frame of mind I was in when I went out. If I was happy and feeling confident, I always met new people. If I was anything less, I did not have a good time.

 

I love cruising solo, but a big part of that is being able to enjoy myself whether I meet new people or not. It's much like finding the right relationship: you can't look for a relationship to make you whole or complete you. Only when you are whole and complete will you find a healthy relationship.

 

Finally, have you heard the phrase "what you focus on expands?" If you focus on the people you did not click with, or the fact that you're alone, you will find more of the same. Focus on the kind people, and on being happy. Only then will you find more of that.

 

Wishing you the best of luck, and hoping you find your happiness.

Edited December 16, 2018 by payitforward

[Z'Loth]

All of my cruises have been a minimum seven night cruise. My first (and currently only) solo cruise was a ten day cruise in the South Caribbean last September. My biggest gripes about that cruise: Flying cross country from Sacramento, CA to Miami, FL, having to pay double for an inside cave.

 

Did I have an absolute blast on that cruise? You bet. This was booked as a birthday cruise, and as a badly needed vacation. I flew in on a Monday for a Friday departure, allowing me to explore Miami a little bit. It was great not having to worry about my mother who has been a companion on other cruises. Even though I had requested a large table, only two other couples showed up. That's OK. We had fantastic conversation.

 

I think the key to surviving a solo cruise is to bring a sense of humor and an open mind. There was plenty of good conversations to be had and plenty of different viewpoints.