Bringing a Nanny

[cyclone1414]

Hi...we have cruised with our two kids a bunch of times, but will be doing our first cruise with 3 (ages 6, 4, and 8 months at the time) next year. We are planning on bringing our live-in nanny from home with us. I was wondering if anyone has brought a nanny before, how it worked out (arrangements during the day, at night, sleeping etc), and if you had any specific travel contract arranged with them?? Thanks!

[jbethel11]

1 hour ago, cyclone1414 said:

Hi...we have cruised with our two kids a bunch of times, but will be doing our first cruise with 3 (ages 6, 4, and 8 months at the time) next year. We are planning on bringing our live-in nanny from home with us. I was wondering if anyone has brought a nanny before, how it worked out (arrangements during the day, at night, sleeping etc), and if you had any specific travel contract arranged with them?? Thanks!

I have not brought a nanny, nor have one brought for me (I am an older teen). However, that said, certain cruise lines, like Celebrity, charge for in room baby sitting for up to three guests. 

[cyclone1414]

11 minutes ago, jbethel11 said:

I have not brought a nanny, nor have one brought for me (I am an older teen). However, that said, certain cruise lines, like Celebrity, charge for in room baby sitting for up to three guests. 

Thanks...If RC still offered in-room babysitting, that would help, but it is no longer an option. This is our best bet to provide us (the parents) at least a partial vacation!

[jbethel11]

1 minute ago, cyclone1414 said:

Thanks...If RC still offered in-room babysitting, that would help, but it is no longer an option. This is our best bet to provide us (the parents) at least a partial vacation!

Check with your nanny! If they are willing to go, and pay (if you are not already paying for them), that would be a great idea! I would book two rooms, maybe a balcony/suite and an interior across the hall! This way, the nanny could be in the room with the three kids, and you and your spouse/partner could be in your own room. Or, the Nanny could have their own room, and your family could share a room! Whatever works for you!

[cyclone1414]

16 minutes ago, jbethel11 said:

Check with your nanny! If they are willing to go, and pay (if you are not already paying for them), that would be a great idea! I would book two rooms, maybe a balcony/suite and an interior across the hall! This way, the nanny could be in the room with the three kids, and you and your spouse/partner could be in your own room. Or, the Nanny could have their own room, and your family could share a room! Whatever works for you!

We are planning to cover all her expenses and pay her regular wage- I was wondering about how people have worked hours on/off work while on the trip? What were the nanny's responsibilities etc.

In terms of rooms, we have connecting rooms for my wife/kids, and then a separate room right beside for the nanny, but open to other possible arrangements too!

[jbethel11]

13 minutes ago, cyclone1414 said:

We are planning to cover all her expenses and pay her regular wage- I was wondering about how people have worked hours on/off work while on the trip? What were the nanny's responsibilities etc.

In terms of rooms, we have connecting rooms for my wife/kids, and then a separate room right beside for the nanny, but open to other possible arrangements too!

You mentioned you were going on RCI. If a large suite is in the budget, most can accommodate 4 guest, and there are also cabins that connect to smaller inside cabins. 

[mom2oneXY]

What kind of hours/responsibilities does your nanny have at home?  If you are paying her way and her weekly wage, I'd think they'd be similar.  Your two older children will likely spend time in the kids' club, but I could see your nanny helping with the 8 mo old quite a bit.  You may also want to have separate arrangements for sea days vs. port days.  I could see hours possibly being from 2pm-10pm for port days.  If you're off on an excursion as a family there's a strong possibility you'd want some help once you're back on the ship.  For sea days, I'd maybe plan on something similar.  I think you could really plan out your sea days vs. port days and see where you'd need her.  

[VicRock]

Former nanny here:  I would definitely make hours & expectations clear.  If she is working more hours she should be compensated accordingly.  The cruise, IMO, is NOT compensation.  It is something she is required to do.  If you want evenings kid free, change her working hours accordingly, giving her time off during the day.  If it's over her normal days off, again she should either be compensated accordingly OR make arrangements to change her days off so she is not losing those benefits. Get a room where she has a little privacy whether thats adjoining rooms or a suite with some sort of separation.  Thats what i have for now.

[cb at sea]

RCI does have the "kids clubs" and the larger ships have nurseries.   So you can get some "free" time without a nanny onboard. 

[kitkat343]

9 hours ago, VicRock said:

Former nanny here:  I would definitely make hours & expectations clear.  If she is working more hours she should be compensated accordingly.  The cruise, IMO, is NOT compensation.  It is something she is required to do.  If you want evenings kid free, change her working hours accordingly, giving her time off during the day.  If it's over her normal days off, again she should either be compensated accordingly OR make arrangements to change her days off so she is not losing those benefits. Get a room where she has a little privacy whether thats adjoining rooms or a suite with some sort of separation.  Thats what i have for now.

This.  Absolutely.  Try to plan out exactly what you want from her - and remember anytime she’s with your kids she’s going to be working taking care of them. Also make sure other people don’t dump their kids on your nanny.  Our  nanny is friends with another nanny whose about to quit since they keep having parties and expecting her to watch all the friends kids for no extra pay 

 

1 hour ago, cb at sea said:

RCI does have the "kids clubs" and the larger ships have nurseries.   So you can get some "free" time without a nanny onboard. 

This is true, but an 8 month old might or might not accept being in a nursery with caregivers they don’t know.  Plus you aren’t guaranteed the hours you want ahead of time.  So I can understand why someone would want to take a nanny on a rc ship.  I’m glad the ships have added nurseries, but am a bit worried about the logistics of them not being guaranteed.  

Edited July 16, 2019 by kitkat343

[ed01106]

19 hours ago, kitkat343 said:

Also make sure other people don’t dump their kids on your nanny.  Our  nanny is friends with another nanny whose about to quit since they keep having parties and expecting her to watch all the friends kids for no extra pay 

 

Our babysitter use to say just the opposite.  “It is easier to watch two three year old than one.  Cause with one you need to entertain her. With two they mostly play together”. 

[VicRock]

13 minutes ago, ed01106 said:

 

Our babysitter use to say just the opposite.  “It is easier to watch two three year old than one.  Cause with one you need to entertain her. With two they mostly play together”. 

1 might not make a difference work wise but she still needs compensated.  I didn't mind my charge having a play date with 1 child (except 1 particular child I absolutely refused to watch a 2nd time) but any more than that & it would have been a hard no for me. 

[ed01106]

30 minutes ago, VicRock said:

1 might not make a difference work wise but she still needs compensated.  I didn't mind my charge having a play date with 1 child (except 1 particular child I absolutely refused to watch a 2nd time) but any more than that & it would have been a hard no for me. 

We didn’t pay her extra for watching the friend.  Telling us pretty much every time we hired her that she made more money in four hours of babysitting than her sister did in six hours at McDonalds and that babysitting was so much fun she would be willing to do it for free was probably not the best way to angle for a pay raise.  😛

[cyclone1414]

On 7/14/2019 at 8:59 PM, mom2oneXY said:

What kind of hours/responsibilities does your nanny have at home?  If you are paying her way and her weekly wage, I'd think they'd be similar.  Your two older children will likely spend time in the kids' club, but I could see your nanny helping with the 8 mo old quite a bit.  You may also want to have separate arrangements for sea days vs. port days.  I could see hours possibly being from 2pm-10pm for port days.  If you're off on an excursion as a family there's a strong possibility you'd want some help once you're back on the ship.  For sea days, I'd maybe plan on something similar.  I think you could really plan out your sea days vs. port days and see where you'd need her.  

I think the different schedule for sea/port days is a good idea! Thinking ahead, the most critical time is at night (i.e. after 7pm) when a baby would be sleeping in the room.

[cyclone1414]

On 7/15/2019 at 11:25 AM, VicRock said:

Former nanny here:  I would definitely make hours & expectations clear.  If she is working more hours she should be compensated accordingly.  The cruise, IMO, is NOT compensation.  It is something she is required to do.  If you want evenings kid free, change her working hours accordingly, giving her time off during the day.  If it's over her normal days off, again she should either be compensated accordingly OR make arrangements to change her days off so she is not losing those benefits. Get a room where she has a little privacy whether thats adjoining rooms or a suite with some sort of separation.  Thats what i have for now.

Thanks for the input. Agreed- she will definitely be paid her regular weekly wage, in addition to all travel expenses being covered. To make up for the extra work days (i.e. weekends) on the boat, I was planning on offering extra days off when we return home. My thought was connecting rooms for my wife and 3 kids and I, and then her to have a separate room right beside us.

[cyclone1414]

On 7/15/2019 at 8:11 PM, cb at sea said:

RCI does have the "kids clubs" and the larger ships have nurseries.   So you can get some "free" time without a nanny onboard. 

Good point...We have had mixed results with the nursery on previous cruises (not because of the staff- they have been awesome!)...but one child who went easily, and one who refused (I think I heard him screaming from the pool deck after dropping him off)...so the point of bringing a nanny is to 'ensure' some vacation time for us, knowing that the child is comfortable.

[cyclone1414]

Is there a specific travel contract anyone has??

[mjkacmom]

21 hours ago, ed01106 said:

We didn’t pay her extra for watching the friend.  Telling us pretty much every time we hired her that she made more money in four hours of babysitting than her sister did in six hours at McDonalds and that babysitting was so much fun she would be willing to do it for free was probably not the best way to angle for a pay raise.  😛

My daughter’s get paid $20 an hour babysitting, and only $8.85 at their minimum wage jobs. They sit for some kids who are easy, and some who definitely are not.

[Kerry's Girls]

There have been good discussions on this board about this before - you may want to do a search and see what others have suggested.  Definitely a VERY specific agreement about compensation, what expenses will be paid/won't be, time off on the ship/in port/how many hours she will be expected to work each day and expectations about what she does on her own time (does she get to drink alcohol on her own time, can she close the disco down as long as she's ready for work on time, can she have "visitors", etc.).  I think giving her the correct amount of paid days off on return is an interesting idea to avoid paying overtime for the 24/7 travel - usually it would require lots of extra salary since the cruise isn't her payment. 

 

I stopped paying for a nanny to travel with us when our wonderful nanny got the stomach flu during a trip - I got stuck paying her salary, the overtime for being away, her medical bills AND still having to take care of the kids 24/7.    

 

All the best,

Mia

[legaljen1969]

On ‎7‎/‎14‎/‎2019 at 4:36 PM, jbethel11 said:

Check with your nanny! If they are willing to go, and pay (if you are not already paying for them), that would be a great idea! I would book two rooms, maybe a balcony/suite and an interior across the hall! This way, the nanny could be in the room with the three kids, and you and your spouse/partner could be in your own room. Or, the Nanny could have their own room, and your family could share a room! Whatever works for you!

Unless the nanny sleeps in the room with the kids at home, I don't think that's reasonable to expect her to stay with the kids 24/7 on a ship. 

[legaljen1969]

On ‎8‎/‎5‎/‎2019 at 6:00 PM, Kerry's Girls said:

There have been good discussions on this board about this before - you may want to do a search and see what others have suggested.  Definitely a VERY specific agreement about compensation, what expenses will be paid/won't be, time off on the ship/in port/how many hours she will be expected to work each day and expectations about what she does on her own time (does she get to drink alcohol on her own time, can she close the disco down as long as she's ready for work on time, can she have "visitors", etc.).  I think giving her the correct amount of paid days off on return is an interesting idea to avoid paying overtime for the 24/7 travel - usually it would require lots of extra salary since the cruise isn't her payment. 

 

I stopped paying for a nanny to travel with us when our wonderful nanny got the stomach flu during a trip - I got stuck paying her salary, the overtime for being away, her medical bills AND still having to take care of the kids 24/7.    

 

All the best,

Mia

Wow, lots of compassion there for your nanny who was feeling ill. I can see you love your children. Wouldn't want you to "stuck having to take care" of your own children.   What would have happened if one of your children had fallen ill during the trip and nanny took care of them only to fall ill when she got home? What would the arrangement have been then?  I'm guessing you wouldn't have wanted to pay her salary or take care of your kids at home either.

 

I have no doubt you do love your children and I can certainly see how having a nanny along would make your vacation a bit more peaceful and relaxing.  However, just read what you wrote and see how it may sound that you begrudge your nanny for being ill and the fact you "had to care for kids 24/7."  

Edited August 23, 2019 by legaljen1969
Need to add text.

[Kerry's Girls]

2 hours ago, legaljen1969 said:

Wow, lots of compassion there for your nanny who was feeling ill. I can see you love your children. Wouldn't want you to "stuck having to take care" of your own children.   What would have happened if one of your children had fallen ill during the trip and nanny took care of them only to fall ill when she got home? What would the arrangement have been then?  I'm guessing you wouldn't have wanted to pay her salary or take care of your kids at home either.

 

I have no doubt you do love your children and I can certainly see how having a nanny along would make your vacation a bit more peaceful and relaxing.  However, just read what you wrote and see how it may sound that you begrudge your nanny for being ill and the fact you "had to care for kids 24/7."  

Hi - boy someone woke up in a combative mood today and decided to visit the family boards!  To answer your first questions, if my nanny had been ill at home, she would have used her paid sick days and I would have taken paid sick days off work.   I'm not sure I understand why you would guess differently.

 

Your next guess that I was talking about a vacation is also incorrect.  I was talking about a work trip, so it was indeed an issue that I had to take care of my kids 24/7 instead of attending my meetings - it really sucks being a working single mom sometimes.   My message in my post, which everyone else here was able to comprehend, was to keep in mind that when you pay for a nanny to come along, you still can't absolutely count on having child care, so sometimes relying on group sitting at the location is better.  My message to the OP was to help keep in mind circumstances they may not have otherwise considered.  I was trying to help and offer support and information to the OP.  You are trying to what with this post?  

 

In these difficult times, I know some people go to the computer to lash out.  It doesn't usually happen on the family boards, where kindness and understanding unites us.  I'm going to assume you're  a fantastic person who was having a bad morning, read my post, made broad negative assumptions and decided to hit send.  We don't know each other as well as some of us here on the family board.  I'm Mia.  I have twin daughters who are now 14, but have been cruising since they were 13 months.  I'm a widow and found that cruising was the best way to vacation alone with my girls, one of whom is special needs.  When I first started cruising with my girls, people on this board were SO wonderful and helpful, so I continue coming here to share what I've learned and to ask questions as I now experience cruising with teenagers.  I hope we can start over in  kindness.

[MrMike45]

Is this a new nanny, or someone who has been with you guys for years (your oldest is 6, so since he/she was a baby)?  

 

If you have known her/she worked for you/lived in your house for years, I'm thinking a formal contract might not be that necessary and you can probably just work it all out with a conversation.  If she is pretty new, then yes, might want to have something written down.  

 

That being said, this person lives with you at home.  So I can't see them getting on a cruise ship and going crazy partying and drinking if they don't at home, and will be back in your house when the cruise is over.  

[legaljen1969]

On ‎8‎/‎23‎/‎2019 at 12:36 PM, Kerry's Girls said:

Hi - boy someone woke up in a combative mood today and decided to visit the family boards!  To answer your first questions, if my nanny had been ill at home, she would have used her paid sick days and I would have taken paid sick days off work.   I'm not sure I understand why you would guess differently.

 

Your next guess that I was talking about a vacation is also incorrect.  I was talking about a work trip, so it was indeed an issue that I had to take care of my kids 24/7 instead of attending my meetings - it really sucks being a working single mom sometimes.   My message in my post, which everyone else here was able to comprehend, was to keep in mind that when you pay for a nanny to come along, you still can't absolutely count on having child care, so sometimes relying on group sitting at the location is better.  My message to the OP was to help keep in mind circumstances they may not have otherwise considered.  I was trying to help and offer support and information to the OP.  You are trying to what with this post?  

 

In these difficult times, I know some people go to the computer to lash out.  It doesn't usually happen on the family boards, where kindness and understanding unites us.  I'm going to assume you're  a fantastic person who was having a bad morning, read my post, made broad negative assumptions and decided to hit send.  We don't know each other as well as some of us here on the family board.  I'm Mia.  I have twin daughters who are now 14, but have been cruising since they were 13 months.  I'm a widow and found that cruising was the best way to vacation alone with my girls, one of whom is special needs.  When I first started cruising with my girls, people on this board were SO wonderful and helpful, so I continue coming here to share what I've learned and to ask questions as I now experience cruising with teenagers.  I hope we can start over in  kindness.

I apologize for the way my post came across. it certainly did not sound very kind.   I certainly misread your intention. I was just somewhat taken aback by  " I stopped paying for a nanny to travel with us when our wonderful nanny got the stomach flu during a trip - I got stuck paying her salary, the overtime for being away, her medical bills AND still having to take care of the kids 24/7. "

I read "our wonderful nanny" as you were writing it sarcastically, as well as all of the things you "got stuck" doing.   Obviously that was not your intent.  I definitely made some incorrect assumptions.  Please forgive me.  Your need for a nanny is quite different than many I have met in the past.  Most of the families I have encourtered who have live in caregivers for their children and caregivers who travel with them, are people who seem to have had children because maybe it was expected of them, or to finish out a Pinterest perfect family.   I know that sounds terrible,  but working as a director for a children's program at a local resort, I see all sorts of parents who just drop their kids off the moment a staff members shows up for kid's club and grudgingly pick them up at the times that the kids' program is not running. Those parents truly act like they are "stuck" with their children and it's obvious sometimes that the kids know it.   I actually had one little boy (a twin) tell me "My mommy just had us because they need somebody to carry on the family name. She didn't even want a baby until my grammy told her "you have to have a baby, but you just get somebody else to take care of them." Like who tells their children they aren't wanted?  That's awful.  I wouldn't have believed it until "grammy" showed up to pick up the kids from camp one evening and said to me "Thank goodness we have some place to drop them off for vacation. Can you imagine dealing with them ALL DAY LONG? I didn't have kids to look after them." 

Now in the interest  of learning how you dealt with travel afterward, what did you do?  DId you leave your children at home with the nanny when you had work trips?  Did you have the nanny stay home and pay for sitter services at your destination?  If you needed the nanny's assistance and you wanted her to travel with you, so that you would have assistance, how did you handle that?    I am curious. Not questioning in a mean way.  

[kitkat343]

We were on princess with a 2 year old. Precovid they allowed  kids under 3 in the kids club with adult supervision.  The kids club staff took really good care of my 2 year old but another family was smarter and they brought their nanny.  She just had to stay in the kids club and could read a book while the staff helped the child.  That might be a perfect solution to making the nanny’s job less difficult (because taking care of the kids all the time must be exhausting) and the child would be more likely to stay in the kids club if the nanny is nearby (some parents vacations have been ruined when the kids wouldn’t stay in the kids club).