Overheard Onboard

[ldubs]

On 8/4/2020 at 8:26 AM, PromenadeDeckWriter said:

 

 

Panama Canal Crossing, 2nd set of locks, standing on the Promenade Deck.

Me: (reaches over to touch the canal wall)

Grumpy man sitting on bench nearby: (mutters)

Me: (looks at interpreter, who is standing by) What did he say?

Interpreter: He said, "Touch that wall, you're gonna get your finger chopped off."

Me: (looks at Grumpy Man, and 'walk' my fingers on the canal wall, well away from the mule tracks)

 

 

This is terrific.  For some reason I can just visualize the exchange and it makes me smile.   It should be a scene in a movie.  😀

[shipgeeks]

I'm so glad this thread started up again!

[PORT ROYAL]

The most cretinous has to be the group of English cruisers at Guest Services.

They had been “free gratuities” by the Cruise Line as part of the booking incentive.

What they were loudly arguing about was being denied having the “Grats” being turned into OBC, so they could purchase a large amount of duty free cigarettes.

 

 

 

Edited February 12, 2021 by PORT ROYAL
Typo

[shipgeeks]

1 hour ago, ldubs said:

 

This is terrific.  For some reason I can just visualize the exchange and it makes me smile.   It should be a scene in a movie.  😀

OP, Who would you choose to play you in the movie?🙂

[ldubs]

26 minutes ago, shipgeeks said:

OP, Who would you choose to play you in the movie?🙂

 

I'm not the OP, but I'll throw out a couple suggestions that I think would be good for this scene.  A couple because I don't know if the OP is a gal or a guy.  Julia Roberts or George Clooney.  🙂

 

  

[PromenadeDeckWriter]

58 minutes ago, shipgeeks said:

OP, Who would you choose to play you in the movie?🙂

 

27 minutes ago, ldubs said:

Julia Roberts or George Clooney.

 

Good choices! Although both of them are old enough to be my parents - ha! I'd go with Anne Hathaway (closer in age, and we can pass for siblings/cousins). Specifically the Princess Diaries era. 

[ldubs]

27 minutes ago, PromenadeDeckWriter said:

 

 

Good choices! Although both of them are old enough to be my parents - ha! I'd go with Anne Hathaway (closer in age, and we can pass for siblings/cousins). Specifically the Princess Diaries era. 

 

Good choice!  If you give me a small part, I would like Alan Arkin!

[Ashland]

One of the most interesting overheard conversations was on a flight home (yes, the entire flight) from one of our Alaska cruises in the mid 2000 out of Anchorage. I later learned who I overheard was Lynn Vincent discussing the book she had been there working on with Sarah Palin. 

[shipgeeks]

Who should play Grumpy Man?

[ontheweb]

2 hours ago, shipgeeks said:

Who should play Grumpy Man?

My DW would probably volunteer me for the role.

[ldubs]

4 hours ago, shipgeeks said:

Who should play Grumpy Man?

 

Reading this reminding me of Burgess Meredith in Grumpier Old Men, bless his soul.   

 

Everything I feel I need to know about ice fishing I learned from Burgess -- "Its cold as hell and I'm fresh outta beer!".  😀

[lenquixote66]

13 hours ago, Ashland said:

One of the most interesting overheard conversations was on a flight home (yes, the entire flight) from one of our Alaska cruises in the mid 2000 out of Anchorage. I later learned who I overheard was Lynn Vincent discussing the book she had been there working on with Sarah Palin. 

We were in Alaska in 2008 and overheard a group of people discussing a woman who we never heard of previously,the one and only Sarah Palin.

[shipgeeks]

Overheard:  "On the cruises (mainstream cruise line) I took with my daughter, no one is allowed to stay on the ship while it is in a port.  The ship is closed til it is time to sail again, then we can get back on."

[shipgeeks]

In a Caribbean port, having lunch in the ship buffet.  We look out the window, and there is a big - maybe 7 foot - stingray in the water below us, just hanging around.  We enjoyed watching it for a while.  DH noticed a little boy nearby, looking bored.  He pointed out the stingray.  The little guy was excited!  He watched it, said "Wow" a few times, then went running across the room to where his parents were sitting.

"Mom, Dad, there's a big stingray in the water over there; you have to see it!!"

Mom:  "No there's not."

Boy:  "There is, it's so cool!"

Mom:  "No there's not, Tommy."

Boy:  "There is, that man showed me, and we watched it!  Come and see!"

Mom:  "Stop lying right now, or we're leaving."

Boy:  "But I saw it.  I'll show you."

Mom takes boy's hand and they all leave the buffet.

 

[Elaine5715]

Last cruise night I was in the casino, woman approached her man and asked if he had any money.  He said no.  She said she couldn't get any more from the ATM and they needed money to get the car tomorrow.  His response, "not my car".

[OZ.]

I don’t have any, but enjoyed reading others.

[crystalspin]

This is sort of the opposite of OVERHEARD. In August 2018, we took 7 additional family members on a 2-week Alaska cruise. Two of whom were my step-mom and half-sister. My half-sister being the youngest and also a social butterfly, made lots of friends among passengers and crew alike. We were all free to spend "sea" days as we wanted to, but we had a 10-top every night for dinner.

 

One night on the second half of the cruise, my half-sister -- sitting across from me on the 10-top, asked "What is the elevation here, anyway?" I took a bite of my appetizer before answering, "Sea-level." Everyone at the table laughed.

 

Well, I do not know who overheard this exchange, but the rest of the cruise you could be sure to hear, "What is the elevation Michelle?" from many quarters!

[MBP&O2/O]

I once sailed with a lad who was the epitome of the Monty Python sketch “Upper Class Twit of the Year” ... very clever but with the charisma and common sense of a cactus.

 

One night, in a bar, and presumably In an effort to impress and prove his sophistication he loudly ordered

 

“Scotch on the rocks ............. no ice” 

 

 

[SteveH2508]

5 hours ago, MBP&O2/O said:

I once sailed with a lad who was the epitome of the Monty Python sketch “Upper Class Twit of the Year” ... very clever but with the charisma and common sense of a cactus.

 

One night, in a bar, and presumably In an effort to impress and prove his sophistication he loudly ordered

 

“Scotch on the rocks ............. no ice” 

 

 

Tim nice but dim?

[samiam0403]

DH and I took our first transatlantic Costa cruise to Venice a few years ago, and gained new passengers at each new port in Europe. One afternoon, as we were enjoying espresso and cocktails at the lobby bar, we overheard a few new-ish couples discussing their thoughts on their first Costa cruise. One gentleman was adamant that it was the worst cruise he'd ever been on. DH and I, having had an absolutely wonderful time so far, perked up our ears to hear what horrible things he had experienced. After repeating how terrible the cruise line was, and vowing he would never sail with Costa again, we overheard the reason - there were no cookies offered at the lunch buffet. I kid you not - that was it. The man was appalled and disgusted over the lack of cookies at lunch. 3 years later and we still like to joke about it whenever we don't have cookies. 😆

[ontheweb]

6 hours ago, samiam0403 said:

DH and I took our first transatlantic Costa cruise to Venice a few years ago, and gained new passengers at each new port in Europe. One afternoon, as we were enjoying espresso and cocktails at the lobby bar, we overheard a few new-ish couples discussing their thoughts on their first Costa cruise. One gentleman was adamant that it was the worst cruise he'd ever been on. DH and I, having had an absolutely wonderful time so far, perked up our ears to hear what horrible things he had experienced. After repeating how terrible the cruise line was, and vowing he would never sail with Costa again, we overheard the reason - there were no cookies offered at the lunch buffet. I kid you not - that was it. The man was appalled and disgusted over the lack of cookies at lunch. 3 years later and we still like to joke about it whenever we don't have cookies. 😆

That man should be very happy on the internet since so many sites have cookies.🤣

[LynnTTT]

On 2/24/2021 at 11:50 PM, samiam0403 said:

DH and I took our first transatlantic Costa cruise to Venice a few years ago, and gained new passengers at each new port in Europe. One afternoon, as we were enjoying espresso and cocktails at the lobby bar, we overheard a few new-ish couples discussing their thoughts on their first Costa cruise. One gentleman was adamant that it was the worst cruise he'd ever been on. DH and I, having had an absolutely wonderful time so far, perked up our ears to hear what horrible things he had experienced. After repeating how terrible the cruise line was, and vowing he would never sail with Costa again, we overheard the reason - there were no cookies offered at the lunch buffet. I kid you not - that was it. The man was appalled and disgusted over the lack of cookies at lunch. 3 years later and we still like to joke about it whenever we don't have cookies. 😆

We took the shortened World Cruise last year and although I had some problems with Costa, food was definatly not one of them!  

[ldubs]

On 2/25/2021 at 3:06 AM, ontheweb said:

That man should be very happy on the internet since so many sites have cookies.🤣

 

He was Kookie over Cookies!  😆

[AlanRRT]

On 2/23/2021 at 6:49 PM, crystalspin said:

This is sort of the opposite of OVERHEARD. In August 2018, we took 7 additional family members on a 2-week Alaska cruise. Two of whom were my step-mom and half-sister. My half-sister being the youngest and also a social butterfly, made lots of friends among passengers and crew alike. We were all free to spend "sea" days as we wanted to, but we had a 10-top every night for dinner.

 

One night on the second half of the cruise, my half-sister -- sitting across from me on the 10-top, asked "What is the elevation here, anyway?" I took a bite of my appetizer before answering, "Sea-level." Everyone at the table laughed.

 

Well, I do not know who overheard this exchange, but the rest of the cruise you could be sure to hear, "What is the elevation Michelle?" from many quarters!

My wife, who is actually quite intelligent, asked me that same question on an Alaska cruise.  Considering that the mountains in Alaska go right to the sea, it does feel like you should be at a higher elevation.  I did my best to not laugh at her though.

[MBP&O2/O]

I once sprung a surprise exam on a couple of our Navigation Cadets ...

 

Question:  What is the correct name for the heavenly body commonly known as the Dog Star?

Answer: Pluto.

 

Question: Explain the reasons why there is continuous daylight in the summer months at the pole?

Answer: The earth is flatter at the pole so there is less horizon for the sun to set behind.