Is my wife over reacting...

[maddmaxx]

Brief scenario: Unnamed cruise line that puts a premium price tag on their three and four day rides to the Bahamas. On recent four day cruise left wife and five year old grand daughter in cabin so house ape could take a nap and wife could shower and relax from day at the beach. Came back to find wife very upset. Maintenance man (not cabin steward) knocked on door, grand kid says her na na is in the shower, man lets himself into room starts to work on lamp alone in room with unsupervised child and someone obviously in shower w/bathroom door open. Wife steps out of shower in her natural state to find maintenance man tinkering w/lamp with grand kid sitting in bed watching. Maintenance man sees naked woman and departs room.

 

Brought incident to attention of cruise staff and all were great, especially security... he was a pro. Wife still embarassed and more concerned that a man would let himself into a cabin with an unattended child. I kind of blew the incident off while onboard to lighten the mood... wife wanted off ship immediately... convinced her it was not the thing to do. She had reasonably miserable the rest of the trip (she really was embarassed) and the grand kid did not like me to leave them in the room alone... seriously cut into my rum consumption. They gave her a bottle of wine at dinner which made her think that all of the cruise staff now knew her as the cat 12 flasher. I drank wine. Wine gave me a serious case of the runs that I kept secret out of the fear of being locked up in my room as a possbile virus pusher.

 

Wife writes letter to cruise line president which I have no doubt that he never saw it. Cruise line rep called to respond to letter and was more or less patronizing to my wife. My wife is not satisfied with cruise line's response... she wants her money back under the simple pretense that the incident kept her from enjoying the cruise (I told her the maintenance man had a camera phone and she was probably already on the cruise critic's cruise babe bulliten board... she was not amused. Is she over reacting? What would Judge Wapner do? Let the debate begin.

[babyher]

I feel your pain,

 

My first wife would have similar out bursts to things like this and then make similar outrageous demands.

 

Fortunately new girlfriend was a nurse in a state run psychiatric hospital. She would provide me with samples of Thorzine , which I would grind up and put in her pints of Ben and Jerry's which she would eat religiously everyday while watching "The View" and "Oprah".

 

Not only did this make the outbursts stop, but we have been divorced over 5 years and I am not sure she is even aware of it :)

 

I cleaned up in the divorce settlement. A good judge looks at an empty stare and a listless nod as agreement :)

[CARIBBEANBLUESKY]

I kind of agree with your wife. I think that maintenance man should have been fired IMMEDIATELY. What would make him think it is okay to enter a cabin knowing someone is in the shower and not aware of his presence??? And, of all things, to work on a LAMP?? I don't know about demanding her money back for the cruise, though. That might be a bit much. But they certainly should do something for her, and you, since I assume her being so upset probably put a damper on your cruise, too. I am a pretty easygoing, go-with-the-flow kind of person, but this is just too much. JMHO.

[cusyl]

I also agree with your with that it was unacceptable for the man to come into the room without an adult letting him in. I would be embarrased too, but wouldn't let it ruin my cruise.

I think expecting a refund, however is a bit unreasonable. It would be nice if they would have a discount on your next cruise.

[mom x4,grandma x4]

I too agree that the maintenance man should NEVER have entered the room without an adult giving him permission. Personally I wouldnt let him in unless my husband was in the room with me.

 

But I also wonder how old was the grandkid?? Not blaming him at all but if he is old enough to open the door he should be taught to NEVER open the door without an adult there to say it was ok to do. He could put himself in danger if he was some where else and did this.

 

I would of been extrememly embarassed as your wife was, but would not expect a refund. I do think an appology from the maintenace man would of helped. If she didnt want to see him in person, it could of been written. At least then she would have the satisfaction of knowing that he had been talked to about the situation.

A discount for a future crusie would of been a nice gesture. But I think a bottle of wine as a nice gesture too.

 

I'm sure in time she will get over this and perhaps have a good laugh about it in 100 years!!

 

Sorry it ruined her cruise,

 

mom x4,grandma x4

[gatour]

And your wife being concerned about the whole crew knowing her as the "flasher" because of the bottle wine, shouldn't be a big worry. Getting "free" bottles of wine happens all of the time on cruise ships. For example my TA has sent bottles on several cruises. Also having the the bottle coming from the "ship's" account probably occurs for other things. For example maybe someone's cabin air conditioning wasn't working for an extend time, so the line may comp a bottle of wine to the party with the issue.

[MrPete]

Why didn't she just second lock the door, which is what I do if kid is in cabin and I'm in bathroom. :confused:

[firefly333]

I had a cabin steward come into the room when I had put a "do not disturb" sign on the door the last morning. He did not even claim to not have seen my sign. It was 6:30 a.m.!! He never even acknowledged my point that the sign meant him, I wanted to pack and had self assist disembark and would have been gone by 7 a.m. He claimed he needed the time to get ready for the next folks and excused his behavior to me. he was not the least bit apologetic is what got me.

 

I had wanted to take the stuff out of the safe and finally decided to err on the side of caution, luckily so no harm done except I spent at least 5 minutes trying to pack with him in the cabin making up the bed before he finally left. He still did not leave even after I complained to him!!! He kept right on finishing up making up the bed for the next folks.

 

That being said Im sorry your wife was so upset, but letting it ruin her cruise is going too far to me too. Write a letter, put it in writing, that's about all you can do, try to let them know that they need to train their help better. Its just one person who made a mistake, dont let it ruin everything for you is how I feel.

[vijoge]

maddmaxx vbmenu_register("postmenu_9881420", true);

Cool Cruiser

Join Date: Jan 2001

Posts: 42

 

 

Is my wife over reacting...

 

 

 

As a wife and a grandmother I will have to say yes.

[cuyahoga11]

I too agree that the maintenance man should NEVER have entered the room without an adult giving him permission. Personally I wouldnt let him in unless my husband was in the room with me.

 

But I also wonder how old was the grandkid?? Not blaming him at all but if he is old enough to open the door he should be taught to NEVER open the door without an adult there to say it was ok to do. He could put himself in danger if he was some where else and did this.

 

I would of been extrememly embarassed as your wife was, but would not expect a refund. I do think an appology from the maintenace man would of helped. If she didnt want to see him in person, it could of been written. At least then she would have the satisfaction of knowing that he had been talked to about the situation.

A discount for a future crusie would of been a nice gesture. But I think a bottle of wine as a nice gesture too.

 

I'm sure in time she will get over this and perhaps have a good laugh about it in 100 years!!

 

Sorry it ruined her cruise,

 

mom x4,grandma x4

 

OP states five year old grandaughter

[cruiserbryce]

The maintenance guy was wrong to work in the room in that situation and I'm sure the necassary steps have been taken to make sure he knows that...but simply put...for something like that you aren't likely to get your $$ back for the cruise...I think the wine was a nice gesture, as a guest service manager at a hotel I would have gone wit a massage as well...but hey...I dont work on a ship, and if unspecified cruise line was Disney...they dont really let things go for free too often

[CARIBBEANBLUESKY]

Why didn't she just second lock the door, which is what I do if kid is in cabin and I'm in bathroom. :confused:

 

 

Maybe she should have double-locked the door, but he NEVER should have entered that room after being told BY A CHILD that there was somebody in the shower. Inexcusable, as far as I am concerned.

[lookingforward]

I don't think your wife is overreacting at all. How embarrassing and just plain wrong! My concern as a police advocate is the safety issue involving the child. NO ONE should ever enter a cabin in which a child is basically unattended. It opens up the cruise line to liability and the child to danger. Not to mention the invasion of privacy that your wife was subjected to. I would expect some sort of apology and compensation. I think a full refund is not reasonable but certainly a letter of apology and perhaps a discount on a future cruise.

 

What noone has addressed is that this crew member was not sanctioned?? Considering the fact that his judgement was so far off the mark for even entering the room it bothers me to know that he is still on board. YIKES!

[toodycat]

It sounds like communication and bad judgment are the two culprits here. I would want to know how good the maintenance man's English was since many cruise staff come from other countries and how clear the five-year-olds articulation was. If his English was bad and her speech was even a little less than clear, he may have had no idea what was said at the door. However, once he was inside, the sound of a shower running is something that can be comprehended in any language. Once he grasped that someone was in the shower, he should have said he would come back later. It is a bad idea to do maintenance when there is an unsupervised child in the room, but on that "unnamed" cruise line, it is probably not uncommon to find an unsupervised child in the room. Perhaps stronger guidelines should be established.

 

I think a full refund is asking a lot. It sounds more like a faux pas, rather than premeditated perversion, your wife's understandable embarrassment, notwithstanding. I would say that getting the price of that one day back would be fair settlement. I am surprised that the cruise line was not more forthcoming with an adjustment and I wouldn't give up on one just yet; my son was badly bruised on a ship once because of a flaw in the furniture and we received 50% off vouchers for a future cruise.

[CARIBBEANBLUESKY]

my son was badly bruised on a ship once because of a flaw in the furniture and we received 50% off vouchers for a future cruise.

 

They probably thought you were going to sue them. You know how quick everybody is to sue over every little thing these days, unfortunately.

[cruiserbryce]

Considering the fact that his judgement was so far off the mark for even entering the room it bothers me to know that he is still on board. YIKES!

 

how do we know that this particular crew member is still on board????

[metrowon]

This is all to Bizarre! Bad lamp. Bad timing. Bad locking of the cabin door. Bad signology on the door. Bad instuctions to the grandaughter about letting people in. Bad exspectations of being seen naked, but a free cruise will make that all better. And if the lamp would not have been fixed, that would have been bad also. This is a no fault situation, and anyone who thinks maintenance was at fault is just Wrong. The Comp bottle of wine wasn't refused either. A cruise is an ADVENTURE for us, and actually this can become a Funny story in the future, if the wife can laugh at herself, instead of placing Blame! Metrowon

[Ellanora]

anyone who thinks maintenance was at fault is just Wrong

 

I respectfully - but wholeheartedly- disagree. The maintenance man should not have entered the room without an adult to welcome him in. If the room had been empty, and if maintenance has rules allowing them to enter when guests are away, that's fine. But when a child opened the door, and no adult was visible, the maintenance man should have waited and come back a few minutes later to try again.

 

To the OP: IMHO, a refund is asking a bit much, I think. I would have preferred if they at least paid some lip service to "reviewing their policies" with their staff to be sure the incident didn't occur again. I think if it were me, I would attempt another letter, explaining in simple terms what happened, and your concern for it happening again, then wait and see if you get a second response, with someone taking it a little more seriously.

[CARIBBEANBLUESKY]

This is a no fault situation, and anyone who thinks maintenance was at fault is just Wrong. The Comp bottle of wine wasn't refused either. A cruise is an ADVENTURE for us, and actually this can become a Funny story in the future, if the wife can laugh at herself, instead of placing Blame! Metrowon

 

 

But she CAN place blame - on the idiot maintenance man who did not have enough sense not to enter a cabin when a CHILD has already told him somebody is taking a shower. How you can call this situation no-fault is beyond me. You think this is a funny story? There is not one damn thing funny about getting out of the shower and finding a strange man in your cabin. Anybody with one ounce of common sense would be able to see that.

[Creepella]

I had a cabin steward come into the room when I had put a "do not disturb" sign on the door the last morning.

 

I'm guessing he'd already gotten his tip?

[RIGirl]

Why didn't she just second lock the door, which is what I do if kid is in cabin and I'm in bathroom. :confused:

 

Even when you double lock the door, the staff can still enter your cabin. It's a safety precaution. Not saying I agree with it - just the way it is.

 

BTW, I completely appreciated the first two posters' sense of humor. Made me chuckle!

[polarismom]

If there was a 5 years old child in my room I would not be coming out of the bathroom naked, lesson learned:o

[Atomica]

If there was a 5 years old child in my room I would not be coming out of the bathroom naked, lesson learned:o

 

Touche!

[max2987]

Your wife is not overreacting. This whole thread is very disturbing! I have a five year old CHILD if this happened to me I would be furious and let me assure you I would have taken it further on the boat! Not from the 'nude' mother factor-hey I can live with that mortification BUT the child with a stranger entering the room! Disgraceful, totally unaccepatable and plain wrong! I would have felt sick for the possibilty of what could have happened. My husband-father of three girls would have hit the roof!!!

 

So, what come back would the cruise line have had IF an accussation had been made! The fellow involved is in the wrong job for fixing lamps!

 

We leave for our cruise in three weeks-It has given me a reminder to double lock my cabin.

[Ceecat]

If there was a 5 years old child in my room I would not be coming out of the bathroom naked, lesson learned:o

 

ITA with this. Even my own 4 year old no longer sees Mommy "in the buff" and I would come completely unglued if granny was parading around in front of them nekkid!