Shyhova

Bravo!!! Thanks Jane for a great review....

I know the worst thing ever is reading a good review and then the person seems to get hit by a Wonder Bread truck and disappears lol. I just wanted to let anyone who really was concerned on rather I was ok or not know that I am doing fine. Thanks for all your well wishes...I have missed everyone and cant wait to get back on a ship. Well, actually at work now and have mid-terms tonight in class so....Everyone Stay Blessed!!

P.S If you guys really want me to finish this one still, I certainly will try to accomodate that, because I miss doing it!!!Lemme Know..

Shy

Hey Guys!!!...

Does anyone else's life work like mines? You go on the most AMAZING VACATION of all time....everything is great...the world is your oyster, (insert another random cliche' here) and soon as you get back home soon after...

Everything goes to H@#$ in a handbasket?

That is the amazing thing about discovering cruising...Whenever things seem like they can be getting to be just a little too much, all it takes is few weeks of saving and a few days off and all those things can be cast aside :p

That is the addiction of cruising...the convenience of being able to get away from the trials and tribulations we all face on a day to day basis.....Oh how I need a DOD right now!!! And some "old school" cheese fries!!!...

But enough of all that....things are turning around for the kid finally and I have been able to breathe for a little bit, so the show must and WILL go on...Hopefully I can get this done before you guys that are leaving next week embark:D

In the meantime I'll leave you with this....

Shyhova "mans up" and leaves the fruity drinks behind for a bit and enters the ring with a Jamaican lady hell-bent on making sure I can breathe fire by the time I leave her shop.....20 mins and idk how many shots of various Jamaican rum I was reduced to this......

Hahaha....Stay tuned!!!

Look at that. I love the smiles.

Thanks!....You know...if you knew me before I started taking trips, going on cruises....You would say "B" would never EVER do THIS/THAT......But look at me now!! lol

We are not going to tell you how to edit it! lol The comment was only comically describing the actions of the guy. No big deal or need to edit.

 

Great review! I hope you sail often! :)

Thank You :D I hope so too!!!

I think I am going to have to start reading this review at home. This is 3rd time at work someone down the hall has come in asked me what is so funny. :p I can't very well say...this trip review I am reading on Cruise Critic!!:eek::D

 

I absolutely love this review and I love every word of this review. Do not change a thing in it. I read it exactly as the other 99% of the people read it. You will always have the few people that are offended in anything you do. That is life!:(

 

I leave next Sunday on the Magic and we are going to these ports so hurry and finish!

True....I just don't like to upset ANYONE...thats my nature, rather intended or not. Thank You so much!!! Every time I think about " where the hell is Leroy?" I start laughing....I couldnt make this stuff up if I tried.

Shy you're killing it fam! You make me want to write up a review on my next trip. I started this one, heard about the first one so I went back and read that one....both reviews are informative and HILARIOUS! Like everybody else said, you need to keep up the writing, you about to blow up!!! :D

Thanks...I appreciate it...more than ya know.

You crack me up! :p

I promise it doesnt seem so funny while its happening lol...:D

One word: HYSTERICAL!! :D

LoL...Thanks

We made It!!

There was people taking pictures in front of the " i did it" sign that didnt even step foot on the falls lol.....Hey..can't noone say you didnt unless they were there right?:p

The second couple we met were SOOO COOOL man...they managed to keep their IPAD dry ALL THE WAY UP THE FALLS....dont ask me how lol...And it took some awesome pictures with that retina display..

We exchanged Facebook information but she hasn't friended me as of yet and I forgot their information....I hope they do because they have some pics on the ipad that I want to post...

Quick Note for those interested...

Of course they sell everyone thing that u need to climb...like water shoes....but they cost more than is you bring your own. Carnival was selling them for like $10...We bought ours from Walmart for $4. We also bought a waterproof Nokia before the trip and that's what took all the falls pictures.

I'm not a swimmer....Let me just say that...So we get to this part of the falls where the rocks are really smooth and theres a little pool almost like a natural water slide....

And the GF is like " babe you gonna go down the slide?"

" ummm...hell to the no I aint going down no slide"

" Cmon babe...cmonnnn"

" Are You?"

*hits me with the you must be crazy face*

" Then why the hell you want ME togo then if you not??" I'm not understanding lol...

"Cmon babeeee...do it...pleaseee"

"Leroy" chimes in from a rock off to the side.." yea mon...go down thee slide cmon big man!!"

" Leroy, stay your @ss out of this ok?"

Why do I let people talk me into stuff??

UGHHH....I just dont like being completely submerged in water lol...But I gotta admit....I'd do it again.

Chilling...we were almost at the top on this pic...

I think this is one of the walkways where you can get off, it goes so close over the falls at this point that you have to almost crawl underneath...

So I'd say we about 600 feet or so up...You are always helping someone or being helped by someone up a big rock or something so it's a good workout....The guy behind me and his wife are constantly stepping into a deep hole or something and needing to be helped out lol....

It was fun, because the water feels GREAT.....The guide is constantly putting the camera in your face and saying " Gimme a Yea Mon!"

THe four of us were kind of lagging behind the group....stopping to take selfies and stuff lol...When we got to a pretty rocky, steep stretch of rocks that you are pretty much not going to navigate by yourself....

I'm reaching down helping my man and his wife up a rock when all of a sudden we see a blue and yellow BLUR flying up the rocks....

I said " Babe, you see that Jamaican rock monkey?"

Man, those guides are BAD...I know they climb the falls all day everyday, but I gotta give them credit....they FLYYYY up them rocks....no shoes....no nothing.....boing! boing! boing!....

Here you are....panting...slipping....stepping into holes...on your knees trying to find footing....and these dudes...Usain Bolts cousins....FLYINGGGG up the rocks " Cmon Mon follow meeeee...boing! boing! boing!

I looked at my man and he looks at me and goes " Where the hell is Leroy?!?"

LOL....ahh....I Loved Jamaica:D

"Babe...lemme get you in a "action" shot"

THis is what I got....

So we are gathered on the beach waiting for the group ahead of us to make it up a bit so we can start...."Leroy" is yelling " numbah WON group listen up!!!....We are the numbah WON group okay?? we are the BEST!!....Lets stay together and have fun!!...Any questions feel free to ask, and my number WON Pri-or-ah-tee is to get Evee Won to tee top with No Broken Bones Ok??"

Say what Leroy??

" Ok, now evee Won ready!?"

" yea!!!"

**** Face* " In Jamaica we say....Yeah Mon!!!"

"YEA MONNN!!!!"

So off we went.....

"Eveee body hold hand of the person in front....Like ah cheen....Start with Me"

Everybody grabs hands and my new friend looks at me and then his wife and goes...

" Oh hell no Leroy....Why I got tobe at the end of the damn chain?"

This dude was bigger than me....He prolly liked fruitier drinks than I do....and He's the link behind me at the end....scared then a mug...lol

So me and the GF is like this....Ok...forget this chain mess...I mean, if someone needs our help up a rock cool....but you got me and i got you ok?

I'm proud of the GF....she didn't quit....as much as she wanted to...

Spying through the trees...

Ok at this point you are saying...Oh it doesnt look that bad...and truthfully...It really isnt...Especially if you are a rock-climbing...trailblazing type person by nature...

The Dunn River Falls climb is a shade under 1,000 feet up from the bottom to the top....It is a natural waterfall, but it looks man-made...

There are some pretty tricky spots on the way up, and most people will need help getting up and around some spots...You have to be physically fit to climb them...If you have a bum knee...or a bad back...It will be very difficult to climb them. However....If you want the experience and can bear it...you can still give it a try, because you can always get off of the falls.....They have constructed "exits" off to the sides to allow people who have had enough the opportunity to quit the climb.

Lemme just say this...1,000 feet is HIGH...just when you think you are getting somewhere there is another section of falls....

You'll be like " well i be d#$n....I just knew we was getting to the top."

NOPE....press on..

My GF kept saying " babe...I think I'm gonna get off at this next section...I'm tired babe"....I kept pushing her...And she will tell you shes glad I did...We had so much fun and really felt accomplished after...

If you are Mr./Mrs. outdoors-y by nature....you may not think it was much.....but coming off the couch watching Real Housewives all year and eating Cheese Doodles to climbing these falls???...No Joke!!

Especially after a night full of DODs lol...

The bottom....Yes..the falls empty into the ocean...How freaking awesome is that???!!

We met two pretty cool couples in our group. One couple...the husband was an equally tall and equally off the chain black dude who named our guide "Leroy"....LoL

Aint no jamaican dude name Leroy....but hell, we went with it Lmao...

By the time we were in the falls we were all calling him Leroy...

Walking down to the base...

As you walk down, the falls are roaring to your left, and you can spy on it more and more through the trees...

You zig zag down the stairs....down the paths....through a few tunnels...

Mural on tunnel wall...

You come out the tunnel and you are almost at the bottom...

Waiting on tour to start....

So let me set the scene for those who have never been and are Jamaica-bound...

Its a pretty big park...You are dropped off at the entrance/ parking lot where you are given a guide...The guide gathers you into a group and walks you down into the park.

Along the way, they tell you about the climb, shops, and explain where to go etc. You can stop along the way at the shops and stuff but I suggest you DO NOT....keep with your group, at least until after the climb.

The jamaicans can be pretty pushy. Just ignore and keep it moving. They are trying to make a dollar so dont take offense, just say no and move on......(unless you really want what they selling obviously)...

The walk down to the falls is pretty cool in itself....like i said, the flowers and trees and everything are beautiful man...

Once you get down to the "entrance" thats where the organized chaos starts. By my estimate, there are 50 or so "fall guides" who handle the groups...It seems they assign every group of 20 or so people 2 guides....One armed with a video camera constantly telling you to say " hey mon!" or something like that lol.....Very cheesy yea...but still fun.

At the top, you can rent a lock for $5 and once you give it back after the climb is over they give you $2 back....or something like that. The lockers are big and can handle a few peoples belongings, so depending on how many people and how much stuff you have determines how many lockers you need to rent.

If you decide to climb the falls, you will not need to bring anything with you on the climb because you will get DRENCHED. No cell phone if its not waterproof...no valuables...you will want to leave them in the locker. The locker area stays HEAVY populated, so there is virtually ZERO chance someone will break into your locker so no need to worry....

Once you are assigned a guide and everyone is ready you make the trek down to the base of the falls....

Our guide...I forget his name but he was pretty funny and a good guide...He named our group the "numbah WON" group so anytime he wanted our attention he would yell out " numbah WON group!!...lets go!!"

We arrived to the falls and were met by an employee who gave us all a wristband and explained the process and what we would be doing etc...

The scenery at the falls area man....I'm not this big nature is everything type dude...but wow man. Between the flowers and the trees and everything, you really do have a sense of being in a special place. I know there will be trolls who have been to THIS PLACE...and THAT PLACE...and will say its just touristy and yadda yadda.....Yea, I understand why they say that. But, the way I approach vacation is....I dont worry much about the people around me...rather its "touristy" or not...I allow myself to take in the sights around me, enjoy the company I keep, and thank God for the experience....I REALLY enjoyed Dunn RIver Falls...

These guys were singing for tips right inside the entrance...

Inside of the building...

We were directed to a operator and after a few minutes we were escorted to our bus...

So someone in Jamaica had left the oven on BAKE at this point...SHEESH..

I was trying to work these little vents, but the heat was like "Boy Please"...so I let that go and just sat back and simmered on the way to Dunn RIver Falls...

The ride to the falls was 10 minutes at the most if that...The Jamaican "countryside" looks just about what you would think it looks like. I fell in love with this port man....

Why does Carnival have this "jamaican" dude for you to pose with after you get off the boat? LoL

You walk through this little building at the end of the pier, and thats where all the tour operators gather to herd people into their groups...right outside of that on the other end of the walk is where we scored the last minute excursion...

I was up early and READY for Jamaica on the third day....

You wanna talk about somebody excited????? We didnt book any excursion or anything, we figured we would play it by ear once in port. Boy, I'm glad we did that because as we walked to the end of the pier there was a representative from Carnival sitting at a little table offering last minute specials on shore excursions. We scored a excursion to Dunn RIver Falls with transportation, entry to falls and everything for $25 ea......#WINNING!!!!

We charged that to our sign and sail and was good togo....

Before we got off we stopped to grab breakfast...

I couldnt find any hot grits to save my life on the Victory....but let me tell you something...Carnival grits dont need heat.....who knew foreigners could make a mean vat of grits?? I thought you had to be from Alabama or something to make grits like that....They werent as good as the ones on Fantasy...but still....Carnival got some good @#% grits...

Of course "Chiquita" got fruit on her breakfast plate....

Who takes pictures of folk taking pictures??

It tasted Fine LoL....

I debated a bit on desert....I mean WCMC Mickey mouse style you can never go wrong with...And on the Fantasy back in October I was not blown away by the bitter and blanc....But I decided to give it one more try...I mean...I could always do something very CRUISE-Y and order BOTH right?...

I didnt need to...THis was what bitter and blanc would taste like inside the finest bed and breakfast in the heart of Jerusalem during the birth of our lord and savior....Such a heavenly bowl of baked perfection that I was in tears by the time the last spoonful went down...

While I enjoyed my bowl of holy Bethlehem Bread Pudding the GF shocked the world!!!!

FYI...it never gets old to her...I think her and the little smiling Mexican lady on the Chiquita banana sticker are first cousins lol....

We headed over to the Punchliner and caught both comedians...They were both pretty funny but Lester Bibbs had me in tears...Dean Gaines was also VERY funny, but when we caught him on the last sea day it seemed like he was mailing it in...but in his defense he said he wasn't feeling well....Everyone could echo that sentiment on that last sea day (more on that later)

We headed back to the room and finally on the second night this guy was sitting on our bed...

He asked could he spend the night so I cleared off the pink couch and threw him a pillow :p

We were pretty tired and plus we were super excited about Jamaica the next morning...

So after going up against Coyote Ugly we chilled out a bit then went and got dressed for dinner. TOnight was elegant night.....

They sang " Thats Amore"....

I did not really like the dining room on Victory because of the location....

It sits completely Aft and feels like you are RIGHT ON TOP of the engines...The whole time you are eating you are vibrating and bouncing...Maybe it was rougher seas and it's not like that all the time....I dont know...but on our trip it was pretty bad...More on that later....

We both started with the ceasar salad...

Uhh Boy...Everybody said this ceasar was so good....We must have got a bad batch LoL.....It tasted like mayonnaise..

We both also got the alligator fritters...

Of Course we both got...

I looked at the GF's plate and was like " Why does your lobster look orange?".....She goes " Ahhh dayum babe...Why'd you have togo and say that??" *hits me with the I cant believe you face*...

So of course I said..." man babe, there aint nothing wrong with that lobster, they just cooked yours a tad long?"

So she goes..." So that means that you will switch plates with me and eat this one?"...

"Huuuhhhh??" *Scooby Doo Face*

So she hits me with the *But youuu saiddd* Face....So I handed over my plate and took the Tangerine lobster...UgH...

Yay! Another Shyhova review!!

 

You really should write for a travel magazine.

My GF says I should blog lol....IdK...Thanks Tho!

We will be sailing on Victory in September and your review makes us more excited to be going. I agree with everyone else, your writing style is great! I can't wait to read the rest. I absolutely have to read the first one. I am from Charleston and have also sailed the Fantasy. Sailing her during College Spring Break provided us with lots of extra entertainment. Lord, if their momma's only knew......lol. Anyway, I can't wait to read more.

Thank You!!!

Waiting patiently, Shyhova, please come back.

Sry lol....I'm back now..Its been hectic, but thanks for being patient lol:D

Where are you man? I realize that you are trying to get an education and hold down a job and all that stuff...however you have cruise addicted friends waiting to here from you.

 

sorry, I didn't mean to come across pushy. ;)

Nah its all good :p I promise the pace will get better....uploading pics now

Loving your review - HAD to locate and read the 2013 review. Now i'm up to date. OMG~ i'm from Wilmington, NC and have never seen any others posted. I attended John T. Hoggard High....Small world after all!!

 

Eagerly awaiting the next update......

Yay....I graduated from Hoggard:p

Coming up next....Elegant Night...and Jamaica!!!!.....Where we encounter Jamaican rock monkeys at DUnn River Falls and I cheat on fruity drinks....and PAY for it.....Stay tuned...:)