Has your enthusiasm ever ruined someone's cruise?

[gailc]

My brother & his wife are going on an Hawaiian cruise on a Norweigan ship next week. I Emailed my sister-in-law a couple days ago & asked her if my brother was looking forward to the cruise. It is their 2nd one. She wrote back & said they both have always wanted to to go Hawaii, but one of the ladies that is going with them talks constantly about the cruise. She said it has gotten to the point where they don't even want to talk about it anymore. So that is a good lesson to me to use some restraint.

 

Here is a specific question from me. 2 couples in their early 30's that are going with us have never cruised said they don't want to eat in the Dining Room. They could change their minds once they get on the ship. Should I tell them that if they don't eat in the Dining Room any night or just a couple nights that they are still expected to tip those that work there? I would feel bad if they didn't, but I'm not sure if I should even tell them.

 

Gail

[afrayedknot]

Oh, my!

I have seen so much of myself in these posts- thanks so much!!

It is true- there are so many people who would rather complain than enjoy themselves, whatever the cost- just read the boards!!!

 

Anna Freud said "There are some people who just can't be pleased because they don't want to be."

 

That may be true.

 

And there is so much uncertainty and things to become accustomed to when cruising.

It may bring out our vulnerable side andd we may not feel in control.

It is a different experience.

 

Some of our friends and family may just roll with the punches

and delight in everything, some may not.

As they say, only 15% cruise and they just keep coming back.

I think some people may have a bad attitude toward the whole thing.

Maybe for those who enthuse with it, it's due to a "cruise gene".

 

Sometimes I have warned people against doing things on a cruise and then gone with them and actually enjoyed myself.

I have tried things that didn't appeal to me and found out I liked them.

I have given people advice based on my "experience" and later felt it was all unasked for and just plain wrong!!

 

It's just that I love cruising so very much and wish my friends and family could experience it, too.

I totally tend to go on about what, are to me, the positives.

And neglect to dwell on what, for others are the negatives.

(Embarkation, disembarkment, slowness of service, glitches, whatever.)

After 19 cruises, I go with the flow and refuse to let anything

take away from my experience.

 

However, with one exception, sharing my love for cruising has always been a positive experience.

 

You are all very generous people and your giving comes from wanting to share what gives you a great deal of pleasure-

the cruising experience.

 

May you live long and cruise well : )

 

 

Pam

[tinsel57]

Here is a specific question from me. 2 couples in their early 30's that are going with us have never cruised said they don't want to eat in the Dining Room. They could change their minds once they get on the ship. Should I tell them that if they don't eat in the Dining Room any night or just a couple nights that they are still expected to tip those that work there? I would feel bad if they didn't, but I'm not sure if I should even tell them.

 

Gail

 

Let me ask you this. Do you specifically know that the reason why they don't want to eat in the dining room is because they don't want to tip?

 

Not knowing the people, it's hard to say but you might try tact, and going about it from the rear. You can talk about how hard working the staff are, that they all have two jobs, many behind the scenes, how those at dinner then go onto work in the breakfast buffet or roomservice or the solarium cafe and perhaps mention the requsted tipping is so small compared to the amount of work they do. Hint hint. Not to mention the kind of service one receives.

 

And you can talk about putting tips on account where they're put into a pot and shared by all or the fact that this line still allows people to tip directly and isn't it wonderful the nature of the people who sail this line. That other lines have people that try to skip out on tipping so they've now made it a mandatory part of the cruise fare. Considering what the staff is paid and what long hours they work, tipping, much like the US waitress and waiter scale of $2.05 or whatever it is, tipping is the way they earn their living.

 

And if all else fails, as long as you don't want to be real close friends you can tell them just how appauling and cheap that kind of attitude is. :)

[gailc]

tinsel - I should have explained myself better. I'm not positive of the reason they might not want to go to the Dining Room. Tips were never mentioned. Their Mom told me that they would rather eat at the Buffet for dinner. I was just wondering if they do decide to eat in the Dining Room maybe 2 nights if I should tell them that everyone still gives tips for the whole week whether they ate there every night or not.

 

Gail

[Mike Henigan]

I have the same problem, I made a 22, yes 22:eek: page brochure for those going with us that have never been on a cruise. In the process of making their excursion brochure now that we have what's available. I hope I don't ruin it either but don't want them to be unhappy because they didn't bring the thermal mug or alarm clock :D

 

BonVoyage

Dawna

 

Dawna, LOL

 

Boy do we need to get together :) My first full cruise on The Carnival Triumph was a family cruise from my mother inlaw. I wanted to do everything right on my first cruise so I was rabid about the cruise boardsread everyting and took notes etc. LOL!

 

I also figured out that doing the cruise line tours could be cost prohibitive as I am fuly able to research and arrange for trips myself. So I did through research and put togather an excursion booklet that I have gave to each member at Christmas (6 months before th cruise) so they could be informed as to the ports and how to do the ports on thier own.

 

Did me proud when several members did just that and used the info I gave them. :)

 

Mike

...off to Western Carib in 3 weeks!

[tinsel57]

Since you don't know the reason, why not ask? Not the tipping, but say their mom mentioned they were thinking of just eating at the buffet. Then tell her how much you love the dinner service - which to me is a major part of the cruise charm. To be treated so well and fawned over, for lack of a better word, it's wonderful. That you hope they will give it a chance especially since ;) regardless of where you eat, you have to tip anyway, why not explore all the dining options.

 

I wouldn't dwell on it. You can't force people to do what they won't do! No matter how ill mannered it may be.

 

My daughter is working part of her way through college as a waitress. She's almost 22 and has been at the same place since she was 16. I know what it's like for her when she does not get tipped or is tipped $5 on a $100 meal bill and I am not going to debate quality of service here. I've seen more kids in the restaurant where she works get stiffed for no other reason than people are just plain cheap. Which is why, in Europe, tips are included in the price of the meal. End of story. All help taken care of and they can earn a living wage.

 

My own elderly father, coming from a different background and another time is the standard 10% tipper. When he comes to take us out to dinner, insisting on paying, one of us stays behind to use the ladies and then leaves extra money for the server. It's not everyone's way but it's our way.

 

I am not suggesting you do this, by any means! But it's just to illustrate that sometimes you can't change people.

 

Summery: Since they didn't bring it up and you don't really know why they're chosing a buffet when they've never cruise before, if you can find a way to delicately approach it without ruining your friendship, do so.

 

After all, they're adults. They know the tipping policy, it's written in their packet, it will be addressed in their shipboard newsletter. If they don't understand it they should be adult enough to ask questions. If they choose to ignore it I probably wouldn't cruise with them again. It would make me very uncomfortable.

[gailc]

tinsel - Good suggestions. We haven't gotten together to even talk about the cruise with the 1st timers. We'll be doing it this Summer. It's also possible they don't want to pack extra clothes for dinner. There could be many reasons they said that. My parents owned bars & restaurants when I was growing up. I had worked for them a couple Summers so I know how important tipping is to those that wait on us. Some do not understand if they've never worked in a restaurant. It's hard work!! That's one reason my husband & I are generous with our tips.

 

Gail

[tinsel57]

I think that's nice, maybe you can have dinner and touch on the cruise highlights and leave the door open for any questions!

[gailc]

They will for sure find out what cruise addicts my husband & I are when we get together. I will be careful & not give them too much information.

 

Gail

[tinsel57]

I deal with this on a daily basis and they're really two kinds of people. The ones that want the minutia and the ones that don't. :) I have folders in which I collect all the bits and pieces and if someone is interested we go over the folder together.

 

I have other people that just don't want all that. They want it booked, they want it monitored and if they've got a question, they'll call me.

 

For newbees I try to walk the middle of the road, I make offerings, tip lists, pro's and cons on every thing from lines to cabins to ship board excursions vs. private, ;), suggestion lists plus keep the lines of communication open.

 

It takes a ton of time but ultimately, the happiest cruisers are the ones that are best matched for their cruise, including budget, amenities, ports and cruise style. So if you want someone to be a happy camper, or rather cruiser, you do have to impart some words of wisdom!