How formal should we be on "Formal night"

[Already In Love]

Or better yet, how Unformal can we be without being rude or sticking out?

 

I bought a couple of dresses at Ross the other day, One of them (the teal blue) is a jersy wrap and so I KNOW is not formal enough for formal night (it's just in the picture because I was emailing the pic of my purchases to my sister in law), but would the other one work, or is it too short to be considered formal?

 

http://img133.imageshack.us/img133/1224/cruisedresses4ov.jpg (sorry, the quality isn't great, and you can't see my face. I hadn't done makeup yet so I didn't want in included! LOL)

 

Also, for my husband, I assume he must have a suit jacket to be considered formal, right? He has nice black slacks and nice shoes, and a couple of nice long-sleeved shirts and ties, but unfortunately he doesn't have a suit jacket. Can he wear a crisp shirt and tie, or would it be improper not to have the jacket as well?

 

sorry for the naive questions. We're in our late 20s/early 30s and haven't done a cruise before, and we're pretty casual in our day-to-day lives.

[madelinerose]

Your cruiseline's website will explain what is suggested for formal nights. ;)

[thechandlers99]

The black one will be fine for the formal night. Add some sparkly jewelry and a pashmina (if you want to) and you will be set. The teal one is a little too casual but wuld work every other night. As far as your husband is concerned, he really needs a jacket to be considered "formal". A long sleeve shirt and tie is not formal enough. We are in our late 20's, early 30's as well. In years past, my husband has not had a suit so we rented a tux from the cruise ship. It worked wonderful. It was ready when you boarded. It came with 2 shirts and the shoes and all. It was so easy and I think only $79. Possibly cheaper than buying a suit coat or renting a tux and bringing it with you.

[happysinglemom]

Formal night definitely calls for a suit jacket, at least. I think your dresses are fine for non-formal nights. The black one might do for formal, IF, as the other poster suggested, you dress it up.

 

That said, no one will consider you "rude" if you wear either one. Certainly beats wearing black jeans. ;)

[Happy ks]

You will see every interpretation of formal on formal nights, from office wear, Sunday best all the way to ballgown. Actually, what you have pictured is kind of middle of the road, from what I've seen lately.

 

I'm not one to look down upon, stare at, or make rude remarks about anyones clothes (OK, sometimes:p ), but your husband will not be formal without a suit or tuxedo. That he can wear a shirt with no jacket is what you will see a few men do, but it just isn't formal. He won't be denied entry into the dining room, he'll just be underdressed.

 

Personally, I believe every man should have a suit, whether they feel an immediate need for it or not. There are times when it is just appropriate, like at funerals, weddings and formal nights on cruises. You don't have to go and break the bank on the most expensive suit, there are plenty of sales on all the time where he could be completely outfitted for under $200.

 

My 17 year old son has a black sports coat and dark tan pants, with an assortment of shirts and ties. He's worn the ensemble to so many events, the jacket needs replacing. I'm considering buying him a tuxedo soon, he has at least 2 more formals next year, plus a cruise in December.

 

That your husband does not wear a suit on a regular basis should not be a consideration. My husband is a barber and wears jeans and dockers (and even shorts) to work, with sports shirts. He owns a suit and wears it maybe only 3-4 times per year, but it's there when he needs it.

 

Before getting down off my soapbox, I have to say that I spend far more money on formal attire than my husband does. I might get the dress on sale, but I've got many more pair of shoes, purses, jewelry etc... to go with, he wears the same $200 suit every time.

 

OK, that's just my own personal take on it, you have to do what works for you :) ! Have fun planning your cruise, we'll be on that very same ship for Christmas.

[sgttami]

We have run the gamut on formal night from tuxes and gowns to "can we get away with this??"

 

On one cruise where we were doing a post cruise for 2 weeks, we just didn't want to bring the fancy stuff.

 

I wore black Chico's pants and brought 2 dressy tops to match. Hubby wore black dress pants, cream shirt and black tie and another shirt and tie for 2nd night. No jacket.

 

Believe me, no one noticed...we had a table for 2 for dinner and after that went to our cabin to sit on the balcony.

 

For us, each cruise is different, depending on where we are going and who we are going with...we don't pose for formal photos no matter what we wear!!

 

We're doing a cruise in October and will travel with family. We will get a bit more dressed for this since we aren't flying and have no post cruise plans..(and no luggage weight limits)

 

Personally, I hate the dress up all the way around.

 

Just have a good time....

[Happy ks]

You know, sgttami, I feel the same way, I could actually do without the formal nights. But, I dress appropriately because it is politely requested to do so and I will continue to do so whenever I'm on a cruise with formal nights.

 

It would be lovely to have only semi-formal or resort casual on a cruise ship and not have to schlep the formal stuff along. Interestingly, some of the higher end ships already do this.

 

The problem I would see with mainstream cruise ships is that people already want to take the dress code down as far as they can get away with. What would end up happening if the dress code was listed as all casual? Too many people equate the word casual with sloppy, or "come as you are".

[maggieworkman]

I bought my DH a tuxedo from JCPenneys last year when we went on our firs cruise. It was a nice quaity for the price, IMHO.

 

http://www4.jcpenney.com/jcp/Products.aspx?DeptID=469&CatID=36764&CatTyp=FEA&ItemTyp=G&GrpTyp=PRD&ItemID=0c75114&ProdSeq=3&Cat=coats&Dep=&PCat=&PCatID=36623&RefPage=ProductList&Sale=&ProdCount=3&RecPtr=&ShowMenu=&TTYP=&ShopBy=0&RefPageName=CategoryAll%252Easpx&RefCatID=36623&RefDeptID=469&Page=1&CmCatId=469|28109|36623|36764

 

The price has gone up a little since I purchased it to $149, but still a good price.

 

You can also try eBay or the thrift shop for an inexpensive, but appropriate jacket. If he does not know his size, go to a tux shop and they will measure him.

 

Maggie

[jp2001]

Your dress is ok for formal night since they allow cocktail dresses.

Can your husband borrow a black jacket for the cruise? Renting a tuxedo on the ship is a good idea too. Without a jacket, his attire is not considered formal. I don't think they will deny him entry to the dinning room but they can if they enforce the dress code.

Another option would be the buffet or room service for food and then, your and your husband attire would be ok for the rest of the night aboard the ship (a casual attire would look weird at the show on formal night but not the attire you describe... IMHO).

[Laetitia]

One more idea for your husband - try thrift / resale / consignment stores. My mom's husband wears a lot of suits (he's a minister), and she gets loads of clothes for him at places like Goodwill - usually for less than $25. Plus, Goodwill even has a 7-day return policy (so long as their tags are still attached). Good luck!

[grod19]

I would say every man over 20 should have a suit as a just in case. Keep your eyes open in the papers etc and you can pick something up cheap. I think i spent 79 bucks on the jacket and JC penneys had a sale buy a jacket get a pair of pants for a dollar. Cant beat that. Most times i wear it it ends up on the back of my chair for a majority of the night but its atleast nice to wear for pics etc.

 

Besides every girl loves to see their man in a suit. And most guys that dont wear them often feel a little more prestigeous when they do. I know i do

[Already In Love]

Thanks for the ideas and suggestions.

 

I'll continue to look for good sales and maybe even browse the goodwill racks for nicer items for my husband and I.

 

We're not rich, but we like to do a fun vacation every year, even if it means we're on a tight budget. Because of this, it is hard for me to justify spending a lot of money on our "outfits". I agree that it would be best if my husband owned a suit for formal occasions, I should probably own at least one dressier thing also. We just don't live that kind of life most of the time. Don't know if it's an Oregon thing (small city) but even the weddings and funerals we attend aren't THAT fancy.;)

 

Anyhow, thanks again for the advice. Like I said, we'd like the option of partaking in formal night but certainly don't want to ruin anyone elses time (as I've seen posted before when people are offended by other diners' attire)

 

To be honest, the formal thing isn't a huge appeal to me--it isn't a put-off either--I dont' mean it that way, I'm just not a girly-girl who enjoys getting dressed up. I was just going to do it because FOOD appeals to me, and I assumed that the formal night would be when the best food is served? (is this incorrect?)

[Happy ks]

I think the food is about the same every night. They do serve lobster on formal nights on many ships but, quite frankly, I don't know why people get excited about it. Every time I've had it, it's overcooked and rubbery. The room does seem more formal and festive, though. The dining rooms are always very elegant, every night. It's not often we go out and have 4-5 course dinners every night, so we like to make it special.

 

While many people rave about the food on cruise ships, it's generally like banquet food, sometimes like a chain restaurant type of food. Don't expect gourmet dining. It's not horrible, we always find something to our liking and we've never gone hungry on a cruise. We just find that nicer land based restaurants have a finer quality of food.

 

All that said, it's probably quite a chore to prepare food for over 2000 people every day, 3 times a day, plus room service and the buffet.

 

Many people don't bother with the dining room for breakfast and lunch, thinking it will take too long to eat there. Nothing could be further from the truth, it's far more civilised and you can get out of there as quick as you wish. Our kids have, at times, slept later than the dining room was open for breakfast and it actually took longer at the buffet and what a hassle it is. Lines to wait in, carrying your own tray searching for a decent, clean table. Then, you have to make an additional trip for your own beverage service. So, spoil yourself and be waited on!

[suziescruzin]

Thanks for the ideas and suggestions.

 

I'll continue to look for good sales and maybe even browse the goodwill racks for nicer items for my husband and I.

 

We're not rich, but we like to do a fun vacation every year, even if it means we're on a tight budget. Because of this, it is hard for me to justify spending a lot of money on our "outfits". I agree that it would be best if my husband owned a suit for formal occasions, I should probably own at least one dressier thing also. We just don't live that kind of life most of the time. Don't know if it's an Oregon thing (small city) but even the weddings and funerals we attend aren't THAT fancy.;)

 

Anyhow, thanks again for the advice. Like I said, we'd like the option of partaking in formal night but certainly don't want to ruin anyone elses time (as I've seen posted before when people are offended by other diners' attire)

 

To be honest, the formal thing isn't a huge appeal to me--it isn't a put-off either--I dont' mean it that way, I'm just not a girly-girl who enjoys getting dressed up. I was just going to do it because FOOD appeals to me, and I assumed that the formal night would be when the best food is served? (is this incorrect?)

 

It sure does seem like an Oregon thing to me too! Nothing fancy occurs around my small town either!!!

 

On a great fashion note, Macy's was having a huge sale today and I bought an awesome black halter dress that was regularly 78.00 for 13.00! I can't wait to wear it. All their marked down special occasion dresses were an additional 60% off!! I think the sale is on tomorrow also.

 

Happy Cruising

Suze

[themoon]

Already in Love, your dresses are both nice and won't offend anyone. The black one is especially flattering to your figure.

As for the hubby, I think the best investment that you can make is a classic blue blazer. It can then be paired with slacks or khakis and dressed up or down...it never goes out of style so as long as his weight doesn't change it should be good for a lot of occasions. You might even find a nice one at a second hand shop, good luck and have fun!

[sgttami]

Don't fret...

 

It's too bad that demographics sometimes play a part in what one considers formal and another doesn't. Don't we wish that everyone thought alike!!!

 

I was in NYC a few months ago to see a play and I've always loved Macy's on 34th Street. Don't know why, but I do!! ( I grew up in NY, went to school in Manhattan and then moved to the Jersey shore) After browsing the store a bit and seeing some things I liked. It was like..."wow..they don't sell this by us." NY..more formal, NJ shore...more casual...

 

A store ( no matter what chain) caters to the clientele of the area...Macy's at the Jersey Shore has nothing in stock compared to Macy's in NYC..my sister lives in NY and comes to NJ to buy summer clothes because she likes what we have better...

 

I'm sure if we went to a store in Texas, Oregon, Florida, Canada, Kansas, Alaska, London the choice of formal would be different than ours.

 

The point: everyone's idea of formal is different...and on a ship with 2000+ people you will see all variations of what they consider formal.

 

(And I'm not talking jeans, baseball hats and the "I'll do what I want

type)..

 

We met a couple on one cruise (formal night) who said they were uncomfortable being dressed up...and to us they were "smart casual. They were wonderful people...

 

Just have a good time and enjoy the experience of who you meet rather than what they are wearing..you will remember them more than you remember their clothes.....

[happysinglemom]

it is hard for me to justify spending a lot of money on our "outfits". ...We just don't live that kind of life most of the time. ...

 

To be honest, the formal thing isn't a huge appeal to me--it isn't a put-off either--I dont' mean it that way, I'm just not a girly-girl who enjoys getting dressed up. I was just going to do it because FOOD appeals to me, and I assumed that the formal night would be when the best food is served? (is this incorrect?)

 

Isn't it funny how different we all are? I'm not a "girly-girl" either, but I love nice clothes, and though I had never worn a formal gown before my first cruise, I am now officially hooked on formal nights. The food has little appeal to me, though I thought it was delicious. I just thoroughly enjoy the environment, the doting staff, the elegance. I will always be dressing to the nines, as long as they allow me. :D

[jp2001]

Thanks for the ideas and suggestions.

 

I'll continue to look for good sales and maybe even browse the goodwill racks for nicer items for my husband and I.

 

We're not rich, but we like to do a fun vacation every year, even if it means we're on a tight budget. Because of this, it is hard for me to justify spending a lot of money on our "outfits".

 

Your dress is fine, don't spend extra money or maybe for a wrap or shawl. I'm sure you can find an inexpensive jacket for your husband, just continue to look around.http://search.ebay.com/search/search.dll?sofocus=bs&sbrftog=1&from=R10&satitle=men+black+jacket&sacat=-1%26catref%3DC6&bs=Search&fsop=1%26fsoo%3D1&coaction=compare&copagenum=1&coentrypage=search&fgtp=&sargn=-1%26saslc%3D2&sadis=200&fpos=ZIP%2FPostal&ftrt=1&ftrv=1&saprclo=&saprchi=

 

It's good to see that you are concerned about having appropriate clothes but DON'T WORRY too much about being dressed to the perfection.

[suziescruzin]

I am another one that is not a girly-girl. I am a meat cutter in a grocery store and I spend 40 hours plus a week wearing black levi's and a grey polo shirt!! I drive a pick up and spend my weekends in the summer camping and wake boarding and my winter weekends riding snowmobiles. But......................I love to "dress up". I am usually over dressed for many occasions but I always get complimented on what I have on. I shop sales and I stock up on things before I need them so I am never searching at the last minute and paying full price for what I am buying.

 

My husband is a contractor and spends his days in Carhart shorts and work boots and does not share my love of dressing up. For cruise wear he does wear button up shirts on casual nights and rents a tux from the cruiseline for our formal nights. It seems like a small price to pay for the convenience of having the tux waiting for him without lugging it around.

 

Suze

[awrightsd]

I think both dresses are very pretty. The black one is more formal. I would also wear black strappy sandals to dress it up.

 

I am travelling with my two kids and my son's suit came from ebay...great price and quality. I am a firm believer in ebay and wearing perfectly good clothes that someone can no longer use.

 

The most important thing is to enjoy yourself!!!

 

Amy in San Diego