Military uniform for formal night???

[GiniB]

My husband is retired from the US Army and I've been trying to talk him into wearing his dress uniform (called "dress mess" in Army, don't know what other services call it) on one of the formal nights. He always looked so handsome in it! He isn't sure it's appropriate for a cruise. Any advice for us? I think I've seen a few here or there and I always love seeing them. I think it's an honor he earned through his hard work and sacrifice.

 

What do you think?

[LARGIN]

It is appropriate for formal night.. He will not be out of place and will draw many a smile from other passengers knowing he served in the military..

[bandmom]

Gentleman wore his Marine dress last New Year's cruise. They made a striking couple. Go for it and thanks for your husband's service.

[ladycaveat]

My twenty-nine year old son will be wearing his Dress Whites for the first formal night on our cruise to the Mexican Riviera next month. You gotta love seeing a guy in uniform . . . ;)

[CDRMark]

GiniB:

There was a thread last year about this and Army Uniform Regs are apparently very clear on wear of the uniform by retired members. Rather than have a faded memory recollection, I would refer your DH to the regs.

Cheers

Mark

[ckrobyn]

I think it is totally appropriate!

 

There was a gentleman on my Radiance cruise last month that wore his full uniform and looked wonderful :)

[Lisa141]

Obviously check the regs, but I can't think of any reason why he could not. Here's a pic of me and DH on our last cruise, he has worn his dress blues and whites on prior cruises. It looks great and he gets lots of comments and thanks.

 

[Guest kookylabooka]

It is definitely most appropriate.

[Bunnynme]

It would most definitely be appropriate. A man in uniform always looking strikingly well dressed on formal night. Thanks to your husband for his service to our great country.

[Gingee]

Go for it. A man is so handsome in his uniform.

[GiniB]

Well, I followed the advice and looked up the Army regulations. They clearly prohibit the wearing of uniforms by retired soldiers (I do not know about other branches of the service) at an occasion such as this. They clearly specify what occasions are allowed (weddings in which the retired soldier is a wedding party member, military funerals, exclusively military functions, etc.). The wording is, unfortunately, very unambiguous.

 

I mentioned this to my husband (who has always refused to wear his on a cruise anyway) who said he already knew this. I should have known. He was always a "by the book" G.I.

 

Oh well...guess I'll have to wait for his daughter to get married to see him in it again. :(

 

Thanks for the advice anyway...it was worth a try.

 

Lisa141, you and your hubby both look wonderful. I absolutely love your gown...can I borrow it in February? (hee, hee)

[GalOverCs]

Sorry it won't work out for you, but Thanks for including the regulation information. I'm so by the book myself that I worry it's self implamented OCD!

For future reader though I do LOVE seeing fellows in uniform (my own handsome husband included!) for formal nights. Heck I know how much we pay for those sets and one should be able to get some use out of them!! :D

[wraithe]

Well, I followed the advice and looked up the Army regulations. They clearly prohibit the wearing of uniforms by retired soldiers (I do not know about other branches of the service) at an occasion such as this. They clearly specify what occasions are allowed (weddings in which the retired soldier is a wedding party member, military funerals, exclusively military functions, etc.). The wording is, unfortunately, very unambiguous.

 

I mentioned this to my husband (who has always refused to wear his on a cruise anyway) who said he already knew this. I should have known. He was always a "by the book" G.I.

 

Oh well...guess I'll have to wait for his daughter to get married to see him in it again. :(

 

Thanks for the advice anyway...it was worth a try.

 

Lisa141, you and your hubby both look wonderful. I absolutely love your gown...can I borrow it in February? (hee, hee)

 

Interesting, the wording in the Navy Uniform Regs is much less specific,

 

 
Retired personnel may wear uniforms at ceremonies or official functions 
when the dignity of the occasion and good taste dictate.  Wearing a 
uniform is appropriate for memorial services, weddings, funerals, balls, 
patriotic or military parades, ceremonies in which any active or reserve 
United States military unit is participating, and meetings or functions of 
military associations.

 

and very specific where it can't be worn,

 

 
Retired personnel are prohibited from wearing the uniform in connection 
with personal enterprises, business activities, or while attending or 
participating in any demonstration, assembly or activity for the purpose of 
furthering personal or partisan views on political, social, economic, or 
religious issues.

 

I've spoken to several Command Master Chiefs who have looked at the words with me and agreed that wearing uniforms on cruises meets the guidelines. Basically the instruction that I got was, if it doesn't say you can't wear it, and it's in good taste, you've met the grooming guidelines, and the uniform is in good repair, then there's no reason why you shouldn't or couldn't wear it under Navy regs. Sometimes, and I'm a retired Navy nuke, we were barely allowed to breathe without a specific instruction, military folk get a little too wrapped around the axle with specifics, you can't write an instruction to meet every instance or event, there has to be guidance that is interpreted. If the regs don't say he can't wear his uniform to a black tie dinner, then the regs probably don't mean he can't wear his uniform to the dining room. If he chooses not to, then that's cool, but don't read too much into the regs.

 

OBTW, thanks for the compliment, I'm the lucky devil in the pic with Lisa141.

[GiniB]

Wraith,

 

I agree that the Navy regs seem to allow you to wear your uniform on a cruise. However, I read the actual Army reg...it's not the case that it doesn't say you can't so that means you can. It specifies when you can and states unequivocally that wearing it at any other function is not allowed.

 

My husband's brother is retired Navy, and I am aware of several areas where the Navy's regulations differ greatly from the Army's. This just seems to be one of them.

 

I really wish he could wear it. I feel that his years of service and sacrifice earned him the right to wear it. I also always felt honored to be his wife when he wore it (actually, I always feel that, but you know what I mean). If it were up to me, I'd say sc**w the reg, wear it anyway. But he is a lifelong hardcore dyed-in-the-wool soldier and won't knowingly do anything against Army regulations. Period.

 

No worries! He owns a tuxedo and all 6'6" of him looks smashing in it! I am trying to work in a few interesting vests and/or bow ties, but he's a bit resistant to that...I'll keep working on him though.

[kalamari]

I can't speak for the Marines (who my darling represents) but I can say that when he is not working, he is definately not working and couldn't be bothered to be wearing any uniform, let alone dress mess.

 

Your husband has rightfully paid his dues. Did he even want to wear the uniform on the cruise this go round??

 

 

 

Wraith,

 

I agree that the Navy regs seem to allow you to wear your uniform on a cruise. However, I read the actual Army reg...it's not the case that it doesn't say you can't so that means you can. It specifies when you can and states unequivocally that wearing it at any other function is not allowed.

 

My husband's brother is retired Navy, and I am aware of several areas where the Navy's regulations differ greatly from the Army's. This just seems to be one of them.

 

I really wish he could wear it. I feel that his years of service and sacrifice earned him the right to wear it. I also always felt honored to be his wife when he wore it (actually, I always feel that, but you know what I mean). If it were up to me, I'd say sc**w the reg, wear it anyway. But he is a lifelong hardcore dyed-in-the-wool soldier and won't knowingly do anything against Army regulations. Period.

 

No worries! He owns a tuxedo and all 6'6" of him looks smashing in it! I am trying to work in a few interesting vests and/or bow ties, but he's a bit resistant to that...I'll keep working on him though.

[GiniB]

Kalamari,

 

No! LOL! I was really just trying to bring it up as a topic of discussion.

 

He has said all along that it was not appropriate for him to wear it because of the regulations. I have seen other retired service members in theirs on cruises and I was sort of trying to talk him into it.

 

I had a bunch of stuff typed out here about what he would or wouldn't have done and he just came in the room and corrected me after reading it(see what happens when you just ask?).

 

He says he probably would have worn it (if it was permissible) while he was in the military because we had sunk about $700 into it (those medals are outrageously expensive) and he would have felt it a waste not to. He didn't own a tux until after he retired and probably wouldn't have bought one if he could have worn his dress mess instead.

 

Here's the exerpt from the Army regs (in case anyone cares) that specifies what constitutes an "occasion of ceremony." This is from Army Regulation (AR) 670-1:

 

30–1. Occasions of ceremony

a. As used in this regulation, the phrase “occasions of ceremony” means occasions essentially of a military character, at which the uniform is more appropriate than civilian clothing. These functions include, but are not limited to: military balls, military parades, military weddings, and military funerals; memorial services, meetings and conferences; or functions of associations formed for military purposes, of which the membership is composed largely or entirely of current or honorably discharged veterans of the Armed Forces or reserve components. Authority to wear the uniform includes wear while traveling to and from the ceremony or function, provided the travel in uniform can be completed on the day of the ceremony or function.

[GalOverCs]

 

He says he probably would have worn it (if it was permissible) while he was in the military because we had sunk about $700 into it (those medals are outrageously expensive) and he would have felt it a waste not to.

 

 

No kidding! We've both had to buy new Air Force semi formal and the husband has to add new mess dress in the last year. It hurts to think you'll actually only wear it a handfull of times!

[wraithe]

Wraith,

 

I agree that the Navy regs seem to allow you to wear your uniform on a cruise. However, I read the actual Army reg...it's not the case that it doesn't say you can't so that means you can. It specifies when you can and states unequivocally that wearing it at any other function is not allowed.

 

My husband's brother is retired Navy, and I am aware of several areas where the Navy's regulations differ greatly from the Army's. This just seems to be one of them.

 

I really wish he could wear it. I feel that his years of service and sacrifice earned him the right to wear it. I also always felt honored to be his wife when he wore it (actually, I always feel that, but you know what I mean). If it were up to me, I'd say sc**w the reg, wear it anyway. But he is a lifelong hardcore dyed-in-the-wool soldier and won't knowingly do anything against Army regulations. Period.

 

No worries! He owns a tuxedo and all 6'6" of him looks smashing in it! I am trying to work in a few interesting vests and/or bow ties, but he's a bit resistant to that...I'll keep working on him though.

 

I agree completely with you that there are significant differences in the regs, which is funny considering that we all work for the same DOD, and I agree completely with your husband and would not do anything blatantly against the regs. Now if it's just skirting the ragged edge or the regs, well, I am a submariner after all, that's my job to test the limits! LOL. The Navy uniform regs also allow the wear of my mini-medals and breast insignia on the lapel of my tux, might want to check into that! It looks pretty nice, if I do say so myself. Example: http://i128.photobucket.com/albums/p192/wraithe4460/Grandeur%2010-2006%20Cruise/Pics/Grandeur10-13-2006TuxandRedGown.jpg. Have a wonderful cruise, take care.

 

PS your jewelry is beautiful, followed the link in your sig.

 

Kalamari, lots of folk in the military don't like to wear their uniform unless it's required, I was never like that, I earned it, and the right to wear it, and wear it whenever I have the opportunity. It's all good, takes all kinds to run the world, doesn't it? Take care.

[GiniB]

Wraithe,

 

Sorry, once I saw that photo of you and Lisa, I lost all interest in this topic! Her wardrobe is absolutely gorgeous and I just want to know where she shops! Tell her I'll lend her some cruise jewelry if she'll lend me some gowns!

 

The medals do look nice on the black tux jacket. I'll have to check into that.

[Lisa141]

Wraithe,

 

Sorry, once I saw that photo of you and Lisa, I lost all interest in this topic! Her wardrobe is absolutely gorgeous and I just want to know where she shops! Tell her I'll lend her some cruise jewelry if she'll lend me some gowns!

 

The medals do look nice on the black tux jacket. I'll have to check into that.

 

Most of my dresses are from David's Brdal or Dillards. I love to dress up and will go fancy every night. All my great dresses deserve a night out!!

[GiniB]

Lisa,

 

Your dresses are beautiful and you look gorgeous in them. You go girl!

[wraithe]

Wraithe,

 

Sorry, once I saw that photo of you and Lisa, I lost all interest in this topic! Her wardrobe is absolutely gorgeous and I just want to know where she shops! Tell her I'll lend her some cruise jewelry if she'll lend me some gowns!

 

The medals do look nice on the black tux jacket. I'll have to check into that.

 

She does clean up pretty good for a Yankee girl, don't she????? LOL :D :cool: :rolleyes:

[Sally Forth]

Obviously check the regs, but I can't think of any reason why he could not. Here's a pic of me and DH on our last cruise, he has worn his dress blues and whites on prior cruises. It looks great and he gets lots of comments and thanks.

 

Your DH looks handsome in his uniform, but I must say that you look STUNNING! What a perfect dress for you!

 

Viv