Newbie Question-How out of place will I be if I wear a full length gown

[wxtrix]

Of course he chose to "give in" by himself. He doesn't claim any other individual made him. He just doesn't like that he has to "give in" in order to sail his favorite cruise line. Obviously, he accepts the tradeoff in order to sail NCL, but he opines that he doesn't like it. So what?

 

the point is there is no reason to "give in". the policy allows for a variety of dress and no one is ostracized or mocked if they dress formally. it's a bit silly to complain about how you have to change if there is no real, concrete reason for the change.

 

If you still see this as someone with a problem because he yearns a milieu which does not occur if everyone does not go along, well, I will certainly not say that you have a problem. But I do think you are being a little narrow sighted in allowing different views of beauty.

 

 

Bill

 

 

he is certainly entitled to his opinion. my point has been that the reaction he got is due to the fact that his comments were derogatory to people who followed the cruise line's dress policy and that he complained about a choice he made of his own free will (implying it was somehow the fault of more casually dressed pax that he wasn't going to wear a tux anymore).

[Seago2]

But... what's better? A great looking guy in a T shirt or an obese, sloppy looking guy busting out of his ill fitting golf shirt? A woman in a sleeveless linen shirt or a woman in a nasty looking dress with her tata's spilling out over the menu? Does it matter if a man's shirt is a golf shirt or a t shirt if his arms are completely covered with ink?

 

Is anyone going to notice the difference in appearance of a guy in a tux or a dark suit- besides his traveling companion?

 

Shorts? Do we not see these same people day in and day out, everywhere BUT the dining room, wearing shorts? So is it a horrible shock to see them in the dining room wearing shorts? How about sweats instead? Or gross looking pants two sizes too small?

 

How about teenage and twenty-something girls wearing miniskirts and tank tops, with belly rings and tongue piercings? Is that better than if they wore shorts?

 

Is a long gown going to stand out against the hundreds of gowns with jagged bottoms with fringe?

 

I think, hey- if you can pull it off, go for it. If you look reasonably OK in shorts, bring it on. But there is NO WAY to possible codify that sentiment. So the old "no torn or ripped jeans" and "no shorts" survives, even though half the jeans now are sold already torn a little and look FINE.

 

I say wear what you look best in, feel best in, can eat the most in without exploding, and whatever makes you look best for the formal picture.

 

I'm taking a cruise in february where you have to wear evening clothes on ALL DECKS from 6-11. Formal night- formal clothes all night. I'll post back whether anyone actually does!

[CanadianTwosome]

"If I want to have the freedom to choose my own attire, though, I have to stick up for anyone else who wants to choose theirs - even if I don't appreciate their choice."

 

The best and most succinct answer I've yet seen!

 

Thanks Jolly! :)

 

I think it's unfortunate that some people are truly affected by those around them. I am in no way making any comment on why they are affected; it's simply their nature and that's neither good nor bad. I just think it's too bad because let's face it, we're all surrounded by idiots!! :p No matter what our beliefs are, what choices we make, or what attire we are most happy or comfortable in, there WILL be those around us that are going to have other beliefs, make other choices, and wear things we wouldn't be caught dead in. Goodness knows just going to a local restaurant gives us endless examples of poor manners (which we take advantage of by pointing them out to our daughter! :) ).

 

That being said, I have absolutely no difficulty whatsoever completely ignoring every other patron around me... I have no idea what people are wearing or what their table manners are like unless I make an effort to actually look. I just wish it was that easy for everyone, but sadly, it's like telling someone not to be nervous when they make a speech - no matter what techniques work for you or how comfortable you feel in front of a crowd, you cannot remove the butterflies from someone else's stomach. If I had a magic pattern for 'mental blinders' that people could use to block out all the offensive people in the world, I'd be a billionaire!! As it is, I would much rather be surrounded by happy, well behaved slobs than loud obnoxious impeccable dressers. :) Maybe the key is to just be thankful for small favours... ;)

[Lady Patriot]

Back to our subject.

 

DH and I dressed up for both formal nights on the Sun a few weeks ago. I had my fancy-schmancy gown with gloves and jewelry, and he had his Army dress blues (He is a retired Army Sergeant).

 

Well, several gentlemen in dark suits wished him a Happy Veteran's Day (The first formal night just happened to be Veteran's Day). Two ladies from Indonesia wanted to have their pictures taken with us. At the risk of sounding like I have an ego, I still love to wow a crowd when I can.

 

And if you prefer not to, hey. That's why they call it FREESTYLE dining. Just please dress in something clean and nice. Our culture has lost sight of the self-respect in dressing up nicely, neatly, and yes, modestly.

 

I did see something at another formal occasion I hope will catch on with cruises. Some couples will dress up in formal "themes" (A 1940's Swing style suit and fedora for the man, with a 1930's or 1940's Paris fashion knockoff for the woman). I imagine it would be okay for a couple that is into Renaissance Festivals to dress in their costume for that period as well (although I can just imagine trying to pack all that!)

[Susie51]

It's Freestyle. Wear the style you would like to wear. Enjoy your cruise.

[Ms belp]

:) We were so tired, and trying to figure out what we were going to wear; we didn't give a darn (or even look) at what anyone else was wearing. If you spend your time enjoying your companion, you won't even notice what anyone else is doing...or wearing. Happy cruising worriers.

[Flick]

O.K. Folks, here is the "bottom line". My wife and I decided AFTER our last NCL cruise that NCL was probably not our cruiseline of choice for a Variety of reasons. We would not be going on the Jade in July except for the fact that over 26 friends of ours invited us to join them on this unique itinerary (It will only be done once). Now let's make a deal....y'all wear whatever you want to wear, and "we'all will wear what we want to wear, o.k?

Now surely everybody has something better to do (or worry about) than my original "poor" choice of words........

[NorthernNeighbour]

It's Freestyle. Wear the style you would like to wear. Enjoy your cruise.

 

I agree, people should wear the 'style' they like to wear. But I think we can all agree that should be some limits -- showing up in the main dining room in tattered jeans with a smelly old t-shirt and a 'reversed' baseball cap worn all the time is probably not going to go down well with 95% of the rest of the passengers. It really is NOT asking too much for someone to put on a clean shirt, neat trousers and take off their cap during dining hours.

 

However, if you dressed in your worst old and smelly clothes at the outside lunch-time buffet, no one would think anything of it -- of if they did, they would just move on to a breezier part of the deck.

 

I agree we should respect other people's right to dress as they want -- but all of us have an obligation to dress on a cruise in the dining room other than in 'trailer park trash' style or as a homeless bum. There is a point where dressing down spoils the cruise for the other passengers. And I think most of us know what that point is. If it walks like a duck, has webbed feet and quacks, it probably is a . . . . (you fill in the rest).

[Lady Patriot]

Well said, NorthernNeighbour. Our experience was proof positive that people will treat you the way you treat yourself. If you hold yourself out with self respect, that's how people will treat you. If you hold yourself out like one of the unwashed masses, that's how people will treat you.

[jeffs55]

I don't think I could quite work the long gown thing, right Carla?

[Seago2]

I don't think I could quite work the long gown thing, right Carla?

 

The dual tux thing worked for me! Say hi to Bob-

[jeffs55]

Yeah I guess we'll stick to that. Say Hi to Tim also.

To get back on point, on NCL I wear a sport coat and tie on the "formal"

night but that puts me more formal than most.

[CanadianTwosome]

I agree, people should wear the 'style' they like to wear. But I think we can all agree that should be some limits -- showing up in the main dining room in tattered jeans with a smelly old t-shirt and a 'reversed' baseball cap worn all the time is probably not going to go down well with 95% of the rest of the passengers. It really is NOT asking too much for someone to put on a clean shirt, neat trousers and take off their cap during dining hours.

 

However, if you dressed in your worst old and smelly clothes at the outside lunch-time buffet, no one would think anything of it -- of if they did, they would just move on to a breezier part of the deck.

 

I agree we should respect other people's right to dress as they want -- but all of us have an obligation to dress on a cruise in the dining room other than in 'trailer park trash' style or as a homeless bum. There is a point where dressing down spoils the cruise for the other passengers. And I think most of us know what that point is. If it walks like a duck, has webbed feet and quacks, it probably is a . . . . (you fill in the rest).

 

As far as I know, there are some limits in the dining rooms - no shorts in the evening, and no torn jeans. I'm not sure about the actual rules since I always dress for dinner and haven't had to find out. Other than that, however, I disagree that anyone has any 'obligation' to dress any particular way - at least not on a ship where the option to decide for themselves is the focus. We definitely disagree that there is any point at which any passengers' fashion choices will 'spoil' someone else's cruise - unless that person allows it. In my opinion, if you let things that others do affect you that much, it's not their choices that spoil your cruise, it's that you choose to let them. You're giving them a LOT more credit and power in your life than a stranger deserves.

 

If NCL wants to implement a rule barring tee shirts from dining rooms, then I will agree that people shouldn't wear tee shirts there. Do I personally think tee shirts are appropriate for a formal dining room? No. I think I've also mentioned, one of my personal pet peeves is ball caps, but if I let every one I saw in a restaurant bother me, I'd never eat a happy meal outside of my own home! :eek:

 

Lady Patriot, I disagree about being treated differently - at least on an NCL cruise ship. Certainly there are many places in life where your fashion choices will affect how you are received - a job interview for instance, where your choice of attire can show your prospctive employer how much respect you have for their company. As I said above, though, on NCL the freedom to choose is the main selling point of the company, so their employees are trained to not make a distinction - as they should be.

[heisnuts]

By all means, if you want to dress up on formal night you should go ahead and do so. Who cares how many other people are dressed up?

 

I think that is one of the best things about freestyle dining. Those who want to dress up can, and those who do not don't have to just to get into the dining room. I personally do not like to dress up as I am in a suit and tie every day at work, nor do I like having to bring separate luggage just for all the formal wear. But, hey, if you like it that is why it's called freestyle. I don't think anyone will be saying "why did she dress up in a formal gown?" especially if it is on optional formal night that you dress up.