barbgazz Posted September 23, 2004 #101 Share Posted September 23, 2004 Unfortunately Catnip, there are a lot of parents that think this way. This is what is wrong with the youth of today. It's not their fault, it's their parents fault. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
caregiver4ever Posted September 23, 2004 #102 Share Posted September 23, 2004 boy!!! I have no idea where you are getting the point that its o.k. for my son to do whatever he wants, whenever he wants including breaking the law??? Are you reading what Im saying?? Or are you interpreting what you think Im saying? My son has never broken the law and if you read the threads correctly he goes to school and works 3-4 days a week, drives a car, doesnt drink,has had his one and only girlfriend for over a year and loves to vacation. Hes going to be 17 in a couple of weeks and I have no idea how you people can think its sooo wrong to give kids freedom to have a good time .Where you get the idea im a "bad mother" boggles my mind. I have heard over and over that I need to cut the apron strings and let him be a kid. Thats no lie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mammallama Posted September 23, 2004 #103 Share Posted September 23, 2004 [quote name='barbgazz'] It's not their fault, it's their parents fault.[/QUOTE] We wouldn't want to diminish their 'self esteem' in any way now, would we. Hey, if the kid doesn't like school, why make him go? If he doesn't like rules and curfews, why make him follow them? Do you realize the damage we could to their young psyches if we don't give them their freedom???? To caregiver: I know many, many people who homeschool. [i]All[/i] of them, except one family, home schools for religious or moral reasons. They hope to instill in their children what the schools are forbidden to teach and protect them from some of the the things the schools are now teaching. The one family that doesn't home school for those reasons do it because their son was expelled from school. I don't know [i]anybody[/i] who does it because their child simply 'didn't like' school. I don't like cleaning house or paying taxes, but I do it. My kids complain about teachers they don't like. I tell them "This is only temporary. You are expected (read: required) to go to school and go to this particular class. Learning how to tolerate and get along with people/teachers you don't like is part of the learning process." It is a lesson that will serve them well later in life. Did you ever have a boss or coworker that you didn't like? Are you going to just quit your job? Or do you learn to work around the things that you 'don't like'? Enough on this subject. It's getting harder and harder to stomach. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mammallama Posted September 23, 2004 #104 Share Posted September 23, 2004 [quote name='caregiver4ever'] I dont limit the kids on what they can do, I book these vacations for the kids because I want to give them a childhood I never had.[/QUOTE]Here is where they get the idea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
caregiver4ever Posted September 23, 2004 #105 Share Posted September 23, 2004 well maybe I should have said "within reason"? i didnt think I had to. I figured that was a given. Like I said I vacation all the time and before the kids take off I tell them, behave, have fun, and dont ever let me get a phone call or visit from someone in the resort that you kids have done anything wrong. In all the years I have been traveling with the kids, never, ever, once have I heard a complaint from any one. My reason for even starting this subject, is because I have never been on a cruise, never even seen a cruise ship. Im not too sure what to expect as far as the kids being confined. How it got to the point about crime and turning into a lazy bum, and most important child abuse, because the kids stay out late is beyond me?? All these people who are bashing me are giving me the " hee-bee-gee-bees about what kind of people we will be cruising with. Maybe I shouldnt look at these boards as much as I do, but being home 24/7 with my job, I really get excited about getting away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nosnobunny Posted September 23, 2004 #106 Share Posted September 23, 2004 I think the point most posters have been trying to convey is that unsupervised teens have been the source of much aggravation to other passengers. They speak from experience. There are rules and if you won't enforce them, the cruise line will. Beth Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mammallama Posted September 23, 2004 #107 Share Posted September 23, 2004 Care--Have fun on your cruise with your good son. Just be aware that there are things on the ship that teens can and [i]will[/i] get into that they [i]shouldn't.[/i] If one boy is legal to drink, rest assured the other will get alcohol, too. If one boy is already known to be sexually active, there will be opportunity for that too. Remember, there will be girls on the ship who will have no limits. By the way, they don't use money on the ship, so there is no way for them to 'run out' of it. (Unless they use up all the credit on your card) ;) . We just took a family cruise with my 18 and 17 yr old. Last year it was just the hubby and I. We both agreed we enjoyed ourselves more without the kids...too much to worry about. We had to keep track of them, especially late at night. Couldn't sleep not knowing where they were or what they were up to. Busted them (and a group of other kids) with a bottle of vodka that they found someone to buy for them. Walkie talkies are not a substitute for parental supervision. Son on walkie talkie: "MOM? We're in the lounge just sitting around...talking". (Read: We're in someone elses cabin having a little party.) My kids are good, too. Both good in school, no trouble with the law. But as you know, kids will be kids. Parents have to be parents, too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bld16 Posted September 23, 2004 #108 Share Posted September 23, 2004 Interesting reading! In response to children on a cruise, why not? As with every person children can only learn about the world by experiencing it. If we put all children in a padded room until they were adults just think how they would behave and what little knowledge they would have. One night at dinner when my child was 2, her aunt handed her an expensive glass cup to use and I complained. Her response was how can the learn to handle something if they are never given the opportunity. Though the years I have found this applies to all phases of life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mammallama Posted September 23, 2004 #109 Share Posted September 23, 2004 [quote name='bld16'] how can the learn to handle something if they are never given the opportunity. Though the years I have found this applies to all phases of life.[/QUOTE]Would that include attending school?:rolleyes: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
caregiver4ever Posted September 23, 2004 #110 Share Posted September 23, 2004 exactly!!!! finally someone admitted they are not holding their hand throughout the cruise. I feel the same way when they are out, I cant sleep or relax either. Im always out looking for them or waiting in the room for them to return and take a shower and head out again. Many times they have been out late and come back to find out they are sitting in the jacuzzi or swimming in the pool with friends they have met. I always pop by to make sure they are where they say they are. Im not in the bars hoop-dee-doing and forgetting I have kids. NOT AT ALL. You can actually let your kids have independence without being neglectful. Yes, I agree about the older one being able to drink and mine not, but like I said hes really not a drinker.I hear all the time " ma will you stop worring about us and go out and have a good time" Maybe I will this time, seeing there isnt a lot on t.v.:rolleyes: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
caregiver4ever Posted September 23, 2004 #111 Share Posted September 23, 2004 School is supposto be about learning not about little groups of kids taunting and making fun of others. The whole school thing, sitting in a classroom for hours, waking up at 6:00am to catch the bus at 6:20am and getting a call from the hospital that my son is there with a broken nose because some kid told my kid to shut up and if he didnt he would bust his face. My kid of course told him go ahead, and he did. There were a lot of things I took into consideration before deciding to pay 200 dollars a week to have him home schooled, trust me. Im not rich here, by any means. but I had to decide how it was working for me, and it wasnt. As far as im concerned that "socialization" my kid can do without. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mammallama Posted September 23, 2004 #112 Share Posted September 23, 2004 Sorry...I thought he was no longer in school because he thought it was boring. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
caregiver4ever Posted September 23, 2004 #113 Share Posted September 23, 2004 that was part of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nliedel Posted September 23, 2004 #114 Share Posted September 23, 2004 I traveled all over the world as a child. I was removed from school, with plenty of notice, made up my work before we left and learned more traveling than I ever would in school. I was expected to use proper manners, behave resonably well (do not interupt, do not yell, no running around like my bottom is on fire) and in general learn that I would have fun time every day but sometimes I had to behave. I am a strong, smart, well educated woman who hopes to raise my children the same as I was (I really miss my mother) and works hard to teach them that there is a time and place for everything. My children are not to be seen and not heard. Cruise ships allow children and while they allow children people will bring children. Trying to stop someone from using the vacation they have the way they wish and can afford is useless. Educational opportunities exist outside of institutional settings. Learning is a part of life. Taking a child on a cruise does not reinforce instant gratification (I don't know about the rest of you but we save for our vacations and spending money). I get very frustrated when I read that people should just "send the kids to Grandma".. I don't know about the rest of the posters on the board but that is not an option for us and may not be an option for others. We have not cruised with our boys, we have felt they were too young for them, not for children in general, but we will take the eldest on our next cruise. It is our right and our privilage to do so. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beachchick Posted September 24, 2004 #115 Share Posted September 24, 2004 [I]Nliedel:[/I] And if you have raised your children the way it sounds like you were raised (with respect for others, to follow rules, to behave properly in public, etc.), they will be [I]very[/I] welcome to cruise with us any time. As long as their teachers agree and will make accomodations (like making up work and doing a special "travel" paper/project--which is what my mom did for her students for 30 years), then taking them out of school is your right. Just make sure they understand (as you do) that cruises are special events, not just play time--unless of course school is not in session at the time, then it's play time for all! beachchick Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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