Help from teenagers please! Our 16 year old doesn't want to come on Legend cruise!

[Karysa]

Maybe I am of a different mind than the other posters but I would not convince him to go. I would find someone that he can stay with and give him that option. To me a trip such as a cruise is a privilege and I would resent paying for someone to come who did not want to. The idea that I would have to beg or drag one of my teens onto a luxury cruise ship would make me so angry that I wouldn't want to even take them when the time came to go.

[Aknot]

Maybe I am of a different mind than the other posters but I would not convince him to go. I would find someone that he can stay with and give him that option. To me a trip such as a cruise is a privilege and I would resent paying for someone to come who did not want to. The idea that I would have to beg or drag one of my teens onto a luxury cruise ship would make me so angry that I wouldn't want to even take them when the time came to go.

 

You shouldnt have to beg, drag or convince them to go. You TELL them to go and thats it.

[Marie51]

Maybe I am of a different mind than the other posters but I would not convince him to go. I would find someone that he can stay with and give him that option. To me a trip such as a cruise is a privilege and I would resent paying for someone to come who did not want to. The idea that I would have to beg or drag one of my teens onto a luxury cruise ship would make me so angry that I wouldn't want to even take them when the time came to go.

 

I agree completely. Find someone he can stay with (relative, close friend) then tell him about the arrangemnets you have planned for him in your absence. He will either be fine with that, or else re-think his decision and want to go after all.

[sjn911]

I agree completely. Find someone he can stay with (relative, close friend) then tell him about the arrangemnets you have planned for him in your absence. He will either be fine with that, or else re-think his decision and want to go after all.

 

I agree as well. Freedom to make decisions within reason, consequences of those decisions, setting up safe stay at home plan with boundaries and conversely giving kid some examples of how cruise could be fun with some of "his" (whatever he likes to do that is ok) activities...helps the kid sort out choices and consequences.

 

A lot of tug of war can be eliminated..lessons learned..with as little guilt and control as necessary.

[roundthebend]

If you can just get him on the ship, he'll be OK. Like a lot of adults, he probably has misconceptions about cruising. Tell him there's 24-hour a day room service and pizza!

 

Roz

 

Love it! It's the most excited I have seen my 16yo son when I told him about the 24hr food options.

[steveaaaaa]

We are so excited about our first cruise on the Legend, 12/12/10 but have two teen boys , 15 and 16, the 15 is really excited too but the 16 says it's his worst nightmare and doesn't want to come.

Any families with teens who can write something to change his mind? PLEEEEEASE!

 

 

Change ships.

 

He might be bored. There is not a whole lot to brag about this class of ship from a teen standpoint.

 

RCCL Voyager class would be better. Sports court,ice skating,rock climbing,flow riders,inline skating,mini golf.

 

Steve

 

Steve

[GayleR]

I am planning a 25th anniversary cruise for DH and myself. Our 3 teenagers (18, 17, 17) are upset that they cannot go. :rolleyes: They love cruising as much as we do.

 

As others have suggested, I think once he's on board he will have a blast. Everyone has different ideas on parenting. You know your kid better than any of us at CC. Do what you think is best for him. I am curious, though, as to his reasons why he doesn't want to cruise.

[cruisin07family]

Did the OP come back and say why her 16 yr old doesn't want to go? Is it just typical oppositional defiant 16 yr old baloney? I had three pretty unhappy teens last year (19, 16, and 13) when I announced that our family vacation was to Disney (MY happy place) but they sucked it up and found stuff to do that they liked. It isn't like they will be glued to the parents on a cruise.

 

We took our boys on a cruise in 2007 for the first time and they complained about dressing for dinner, suits???? for formal night, etc. They didn't want to but they had a blast. They have asked every summer if we can take another cruise. Their favorites were definitely ordering room service at 2am, 24-hr pizza, and nonstop ice cream. After all the complaining about dressing for dinner, do you know that those same three dressed in their khakis and polos and went to the dining room without us when dh and I had date night at the steak house?!! That says a lot about how much they loved the food and service!

[gtouch]

We are so excited about our first cruise on the Legend, 12/12/10 but have two teen boys , 15 and 16, the 15 is really excited too but the 16 says it's his worst nightmare and doesn't want to come.

Any families with teens who can write something to change his mind? PLEEEEEASE!

 

I agree once on board he will probably have a great time. But you need to find out does he have a phobia of some kind about this? You used the term "his worst nightmare". If he has a psych condition about this it may ruin it for all of you if he went.

[mykdsmom]

My dad has a saying to live by:

If one person has to be miserable, make sure it's the other person!

Your father is brilliant! Love this saying.

 

I have 2 boys ages almost 13 and 15 and both find it "cool" to be not so cool to go on the cruise but I can see through their "coolness" and they are going with us in 12 days "NO EXCUSES". I am purposely not saying how great the cruise will be because if I want it they will go out of their way to not want it.

 

I'm just going about our business getting clothing/packing done and I do believe it's rubbing off on them. They are both saying they won't be spending any time in their "groups" but I know otherwise. I have learned in my 27 years of being a parent, that sometimes you have to push them out of their comfort zone, and they will end up having fun in spite of themselves.

[cruisingaddict10]

My parents always took us cruising when my sister and I were younger. When we were 15-17 it was the best age to be on a cruise. We met so many people our age and did everything with them throughout the cruise. It is the best experience he won't have a bad time. Plus having our own independence going around the ship at that age made us feel special. I always tell people my experiences as a teen and cruising.. it is where i created some great memories and friends.

[imapilotaz]

I guess unlike many of the folks on here, that I can relate to both sides of this. I am now 30 years old with 2 sons (7 and 4, with the 7 year old very questioning of authority) plus I traveled alot as a kid and went through periods in my teens of being very "awkward" in any social setting.

 

Since we havent heard back from the OP, we dont know the whole story, but at 16, I would guess that the reason is completely social. Even if they have alot of friends, they may be very uncomfortable and shy around strangers. I know I was. I luckily didnt pull this crap too badly (my dad woulda taken out the belt if I had), but I did pull this type of stunt many times in my childhood (I dont wanna go, you cant make me). I was always forced into going, and EVERY time my parents ended up being right. It's an amazing thing that you realize once you become a parent that your own parents really were right most of the time and they only had your best interests in mind.

 

My take is that the kid is trying to push the boundaries and establish another example of him being in charge. To me, it is incredible important for a parent to not give in to them and to make sure they are there. I guarantee you that he will be a pain in the A$$ the first day, but there is nothing you can do about it. Leave him alone, let him wander the boat by himself and do what he wants. He will ultimately end up with kids his own age and realize that there are other kids there with his same interests and end up having fun.

 

In the end, you just need to force him there. What port is it out of? Try to add something in nearby the day before hand that he wants to do... ie, if its Port Canaveral, add in a day at Disney World or Universal Studios. If he has an interest in something else, get on the web and look for ideas on doing a day of things just for him before the cruise. He'll appreciate it and likely will not be a little ***** on the boat the first day or two.

[shrews1]

Thanks for all your comments in reply to my post, most helpful some not!!

Just to clarify, although I said he didn't WANT to come and wants to stay at home, he WILL be coming! I just wanted some positive comments from other teens to help persuade him it will be fun.

It's just sad that we give our kids such great opportunities these day and they don't appreciate things.

I know once he gets there he will love it and will party the whole week. And so will I !!!!

PS any other teens going? Legend 12 December.

[islandwannabee]

Thanks for all your comments in reply to my post, most helpful some not!!

Just to clarify, although I said he didn't WANT to come and wants to stay at home, he WILL be coming! I just wanted some positive comments from other teens to help persuade him it will be fun.

It's just sad that we give our kids such great opportunities these day and they don't appreciate things.

I know once he gets there he will love it and will party the whole week. And so will I !!!!

PS any other teens going? Legend 12 December.

 

In my professional cruise opinion, there won't be many children on board that week, most schools are in session. You could check out your roll call for that week and see if anyone with children are on your cruise.

 

Cindy

[MrPete]

Thanks for all your comments in reply to my post, most helpful some not!!

Just to clarify, although I said he didn't WANT to come and wants to stay at home, he WILL be coming! I just wanted some positive comments from other teens to help persuade him it will be fun.

It's just sad that we give our kids such great opportunities these day and they don't appreciate things.

I know once he gets there he will love it and will party the whole week. And so will I !!!!

PS any other teens going? Legend 12 December.

 

Although I didn't read this other post (did it get poofed or something?) I would try to find out WHY he thinks he would not enjoy something he's never done before.

 

But all he really needs is ONE on board sweetheart to meet. :)

[gone_cruisin]

As my parents always told me growing up -

"Want in one hand and @%$& in the other"

 

He will enjoy it after the first day!

 

Enjoy!

[Frank12]

I've never been on a cruise without teenagers on board, no matter what time of year.

[Aknot]

Thanks for all your comments in reply to my post, most helpful some not!!

Just to clarify, although I said he didn't WANT to come and wants to stay at home, he WILL be coming! I just wanted some positive comments from other teens to help persuade him it will be fun.

It's just sad that we give our kids such great opportunities these day and they don't appreciate things.

I know once he gets there he will love it and will party the whole week. And so will I !!!!

PS any other teens going? Legend 12 December.

 

Also I dont believe there are a lot of "teens" on the boards. At teen it just depends on the type of person he is and what he really likes.

 

If he were a "nature" type person he could easily find stuff to do over a "tech" type teen.

 

On top of that he may find out something he likes that he didnt even know he likes.

 

Glad to hear he is going regardless as to why. NOW if he goes and has a completely terrible time he may have a better reason for not going next time.. ;)

[JerseyshoreBruce]

My parents never took me to Disney or on a cruise....so i always tell my kids they don't know how lucky they are. They will have a great time. Also this is not a knock on my parents they were great...just never did or maybe couldn't afford these things. God i love cruising!

[Perfect Stranger]

What kid would complain about a cruise when the alternative is school?:confused:

[Aknot]

What kid would complain about a cruise when the alternative is school?:confused:

 

A very studious one.... :D

[tracyvansmith]

As my parents always told me growing up -

"Want in one hand and @%$& in the other"

 

He will enjoy it after the first day!

 

Enjoy!

 

Did we have the same parents?:D

 

Mine would end the saying with "and see which one gets full faster."

[newbieMom]

My teen son LOVES cruising! Is it for the ship? The itinerary? The quality time with family? NO! It's the pizza station. No joke.:rolleyes:

[Green Boy]

Did we have the same parents?:D

 

Mine would end the saying with "and see which one gets full faster."

 

My Father said the same thing to me all the time.

and find myself saying the same thing these days... I can't remember

what age I was when I turned into my Father... :D

[Normal 1]

My 16 year old daughter had a blast on her first cruise this year over spring break. She ate dinner with the family and we did excursions together. That was all I saw of her other than the 'check-ins' I required in the late evening hours.

 

She had a 'group' of 10-12 others in the 15-17 age range that still talk and are even planning a summer get together.

 

Club 02 has a meet/greet the first night he should attend. Set some ground rules and allow him to stay at Club 02 until they close (usually, 1 a.m.) We met 2 other families with similar aged kids on the roll-call and arranged to 'do' an excursion together at the first port. The kids 'clicked' and hung together all week.

 

He'll loosen up on board.....there really is a ton to do. Have him do a search for the Club 02 Fun Times. And let him chime in on the roll-call forum seeking other teens with similar likes. Worst case..... he'll see lots of water, foreigh countries, new foods..AND...it may rain, the sun may shine, he may order room service, get a chocolate on his pillow, see some shows, and maybe even make a new friend.

 

Enjoy your cruise.