Have to cancel son's reservation b/o sports!

[salty dingo]

Unless he aspires to be a pro baseball player some day, being cut from the team as a HS freshman is not going to be a big deal, but the cruise probably will be, in the long run.

 

He will have three more years to play in HS, also.

 

But if it is important to him and he would rather not cruise then I would not force him to go. Just try and persuade him.

[dannymissy]

When I was in HS I was in Marching Band, played basketball in winter and played softball in spring and summer. I also owned a horse and did horse shows almost year-round. The only thing we ever did for the years my sisters and I were in HS was a week in the summer to visit grandparents, and at Christmas time. Occasionally my parents would go away together, and once they and my little sister went somewhere, but they knew I wasn't going anywhere.

 

Fast forward 15 years. I am not a professional athlete, nor am I a famous musician or equestrian, but you know what? Not vacationing and choosing extracurriculars instead is STILL worth it to me. I have wonderful memories of jr. high and high school activities, and now I have wonderful memories of family vacations post-high school.

 

OP - I think you're doing the right thing, although I'm sorry you have to leave him behind.

[friedshrimp]

When I was in HS I was in Marching Band, played basketball in winter and played softball in spring and summer. I also owned a horse and did horse shows almost year-round. The only thing we ever did for the years my sisters and I were in HS was a week in the summer to visit grandparents, and at Christmas time. Occasionally my parents would go away together, and once they and my little sister went somewhere, but they knew I wasn't going anywhere.

 

Fast forward 15 years. I am not a professional athlete, nor am I a famous musician or equestrian, but you know what? Not vacationing and choosing extracurriculars instead is STILL worth it to me. I have wonderful memories of jr. high and high school activities, and now I have wonderful memories of family vacations post-high school.

 

OP - I think you're doing the right thing, although I'm sorry you have to leave him behind.

 

Okay, but was it worth it to your parents for not being able to take more vacations so that you could do all these activities??

[MissDiva1]

If you are a coach who chooses players based on work ethic over ability, so much the worse for you and your teams. Work ethic can be taught, innate ability/talent, cannot.

 

Practice makes perfect.....you can take a child with a spec of talent and with the right training and a level head and commitment, he will achieve far more then the cocky star who has his parents whining about having to schedule vacation around his schedules;) Childen learn from their parents.

 

I think your question is a bit off track since I am advocating that ALL players get Spring Break off, not that ONLY star players get Spring Break off.

 

As others have said you are still missing the point. Sports programs, parents and children involved don't have a problem playing during spring break. They love what they do.

 

Okay, but was it worth it to your parents for not being able to take more vacations so that you could do all these activities??

 

I can't speak for him but there are many more weeks in the year to vacation.......

[jenwales]

Okay, but was it worth it to your parents for not being able to take more vacations so that you could do all these activities??

 

Most parents who have very active kids are happy to make small sacrifices (vacationing one week rather than another) to ensure that their kids can participate in their chosen activities. It's called being supportive.

[SuiteTraveler]

Practice makes perfect.....you can take a child with a spec of talent and with the right training and a level head and commitment, he will achieve far more then the cocky star who has his parents whining about having to schedule vacation around his schedules;) Childen learn from their parents.

 

.

 

 

As others have said you are still missing the point. Sports programs, parents and children involved don't have a problem playing during spring break. They love what they do.

 

I can't speak for him but there are many more weeks in the year to vacation.......

 

Excuse me for pointint this out, but you are going off topic. This is NOT a star player wanting to take vacation, it's a new player who was not informed, nor were his parents informed PRIOR to his making the team, that their longstanding vacation would have to be cancelled (at least for him and other arrangements made for where he would stay while they were gone) if he made the team or he would be off the team.

 

A family vacation is of significantly more value educationally and in terms of family relations than the kid playing another game or going to practice a few more times. It just is. No high school sport should be so critical that a child misses out on an opportunity to see some of the world and spend valuable time with his parents. I recall a tragic incident while I was in school where we went on vacation overseas with 2 other families during spring break. The next September, the mother of one of the families was diagnosed with cancer and died less than a month later. (The family had absolutely no idea that she was ill up until she was diagnosed.) That vacation turned out to be the LAST one those kids ever shared with their mother. If the kids had stayed home to practice baseball, do you think that they would have been glad they chose sports over family after their mother died? I don't think so.

 

 

There may be other weeks the family could vacation, but this situation is a long standing plan that the familiy has already paid for and the parents WILL LOSE MONEY for their prepaid cruise due to the coach NOT informing the parents of the obligation beforehand.

[fourwaystreet]

Okay, but was it worth it to your parents for not being able to take more vacations so that you could do all these activities??

 

It is called being selfless for the sake of your children.

[MissDiva1]

Excuse me for pointint this out, but you are going off topic. This is NOT a star player wanting to take vacation, it's a new player who was not informed, nor were his parents informed PRIOR to his making the team, that their longstanding vacation would have to be cancelled (at least for him and other arrangements made for where he would stay while they were gone) if he made the team or he would be off the team.

 

A family vacation is of significantly more value educationally and in terms of family relations than the kid playing another game or going to practice a few more times. It just is. No high school sport should be so critical that a child misses out on an opportunity to see some of the world and spend valuable time with his parents. I recall a tragic incident while I was in school where we went on vacation overseas with 2 other families during spring break. The next September, the mother of one of the families was diagnosed with cancer and died less than a month later. (The family had absolutely no idea that she was ill up until she was diagnosed.) That vacation turned out to be the LAST one those kids ever shared with their mother. If the kids had stayed home to practice baseball, do you think that they would have been glad they chose sports over family after their mother died? I don't think so.

 

 

There may be other weeks the family could vacation, but this situation is a long standing plan that the familiy has already paid for and the parents WILL LOSE MONEY for their prepaid cruise due to the coach NOT informing the parents of the obligation beforehand.

 

The OP admitted that she should have checked her sons schedule BEFORE she scheduled the cruise.......if she would have taken that responsiblity, as any parent should have.....this would be a non issue. So the next responsible thing she did wascontact a family member to take care of her son during that week.......

Now that she is informed she will schedule around it next season.

Responsibility lies with everyone involved.....not just the coach.

[Luv2Travelnow]

Getting cut from the team for missing practice during the week of Spring Break? Is the coach high?

 

I am very athletic, I play sports and work out constantly. Even I know to take a week off and relax, like on my last cruise.

 

In fact there was a tennis tournament the weekend of the week of my cruise departure, and I waited several months to play in this tournament. I am especially good at it and would have won some prizes.

 

Guess what, I decided to forego the tournament, and take the cruise for my family's sake. It is simply too crazy to think otherwise. Family comes first, no matter what.

[jenwales]

Family comes first, no matter what.

 

People keep saying this and it is trite. Of course family is (should be) everyone's first priority, but vacation does not equal family. Telling a child that mom's cruise is more important than his passion is not going to instill love and admiration; it's going to create resentment.

 

Family is important every day, not just on vacation.

[Martini Mom]

People keep saying this and it is trite. Of course family is (should be) everyone's first priority, but vacation does not equal family. Telling a child that mom's cruise is more important than his passion is not going to instill love and admiration; it's going to create resentment.

 

Family is important every day, not just on vacation.

That's just the point though. How much family time do kids get these days with all of the sports practices and games? It used to be the workaholic dad who only saw his family during vacations. Now it's the kids.

[Luv2Travelnow]

People keep saying this and it is trite. Of course family is (should be) everyone's first priority, but vacation does not equal family. Telling a child that mom's cruise is more important than his passion is not going to instill love and admiration; it's going to create resentment.

 

Family is important every day, not just on vacation.

I disagree with you 100%. You have no idea of what family vacation is, then by your saying.

 

We all get caught up in the day to day living. A family vacation is exactly that, a chance to get away and enjoy family time together. I am sorry you do not have an understanding of what it means, to place family first.

[akcruz]

I haven not read all the posts on this thread but having read those that I did, it is obvious most of you don't have a clue about the position the OP is in. I have kids in and through high school and let me tell you sports are a huge deal especially in the large schools. From my own experience it is stated well before tryouts even begin that those that make the team will be required to attend practices and/or games on weekends and during any breaks/holidays. If you are not willing to adhere to those rules, don't bother trying out.

 

It is a hard lesson that the OP learned as it seems that this message did not get to them until after their son made the team. To any of you with up and coming high schoolers pay attention to what is communicated to your teens. It is your responsbility as the parent to know the rules going in since most teens won't tell you on their own.

 

As for taking the chance and taking your kids out during a break, unless they are a superstar there is always another kid waiting in the wing to take their place and the coaches would much rather have someone they can count on to be there on their team.

 

OP, sorry this happened, but glad you have found a way to make it work.

[jenwales]

That's just the point though. How much family time do kids get these days with all of the sports practices and games? It used to be the workaholic dad who only saw his family during vacations. Now it's the kids.

 

Nah, I disagree. As a parent, I attend all of my son's performances (no sports here, my kid is a musician) and spend a lot of time behind the scenes with the boosters supporting his activities. He rehearses 6 days a week, but we're also together every evening for dinner and family time. Kids aren't practicing 24/7; it's just a part of their lives.

 

It's funny though---on cruises, my kid heads to the teen club and I see him at dinner, just like at home. It's not like we spend every second of the day bonding. I'd guess that on vacation we spend a couple of extra hours a day together, max, and he's not the only kid up in the clubs. :)

[jenwales]

I disagree with you 100%. You have no idea of what family vacation is, then by your saying.

 

We all get caught up in the day to day living. A family vacation is exactly that, a chance to get away and enjoy family time together. I am sorry you do not have an understanding of what it means, to place family first.

 

Whatever!

[akcruz]

Okay, but was it worth it to your parents for not being able to take more vacations so that you could do all these activities??

 

Being a parent involves making sacrifices for your kids. If you don't want to be there to support your kids as they are growing up and just continue to live your life as you desire then don't have kids.

 

Family time can be any time. Those of you that take cruises to get family time, how much time do you actually spend together? I know my teens are off with friends they met quite a bit. The reason we cruise is that it allows each of us to do things we enjoy and still have time together. We do insist that dinner is together every night as well as time in ports. Other than that, we each do our own thing, sometimes that means being together, sometimes not.

[MissDiva1]

Family comes first, no matter what.

 

Wouldn't that be supporting your childs ambitions to play sports too:confused:

We don't need to get away to have family time......but we do choose to go on vacation a couple times a year.

[CanadianTwosome]

I've only read the first few posts, so I'm unaware of much of the conversation. I'm commenting only on the idea of someone expecting to dictate my child's holidays because of their involvement in extracurricular activities.

 

I think it stinks. I think that school activities are SCHOOL activities, and should take place during the regular school year - meaning times when school is not officially out for holidays. Would the coach schedule games over Christmas break? How about summer holidays? Even if they did, though, it's still HOLIDAY time, not school time, and if a family has specificially chosen that time to leave town - so that their children do not miss school in most cases - threatening them with 'punishment' or expulsion from the team is just crappy, in my opinion.

 

School is like 'practice' for adulthood. The biggest difference between students travelling and adults travelling, though, is that adults get to choose when they ask for time off from work. Students have a set schedule, and as a parent I can say that I rely on the schedule to make plans. As a coach that works for the school system that has dictated this schedule, they should be expected to follow the same schedule. In the event that they choose to schedule practices or even games over holidays, at the very least they should be optional.

[friedshrimp]

I can't speak for him but there are many more weeks in the year to vacation.......

 

And most of those are taken by the actually schooling the child is in school for. You really can't be advocating that it's okay to take a child out of school for a vacation as long as it doesn't interfere with sports?? Also, many jobs that parents have dictate when vacation can be taken, such as when a factory shuts down for two weeks and all workers must take their vacation then.

[MissDiva1]

I've only read the first few posts, so I'm unaware of much of the conversation. I'm commenting only on the idea of someone expecting to dictate my child's holidays because of their involvement in extracurricular activities.

 

I think it stinks. I think that school activities are SCHOOL activities, and should take place during the regular school year - meaning times when school is not officially out for holidays. Would the coach schedule games over Christmas break? How about summer holidays? Even if they did, though, it's still HOLIDAY time, not school time, and if a family has specificially chosen that time to leave town - so that their children do not miss school in most cases - threatening them with 'punishment' or expulsion from the team is just crappy, in my opinion.

 

School is like 'practice' for adulthood. The biggest difference between students travelling and adults travelling, though, is that adults get to choose when they ask for time off from work. Students have a set schedule, and as a parent I can say that I rely on the schedule to make plans. As a coach that works for the school system that has dictated this schedule, they should be expected to follow the same schedule. In the event that they choose to schedule practices or even games over holidays, at the very least they should be optional.

 

High school football practice starts in the summer before school starts.....and also play games/practice during Christmas break...hope that answers one of your question.....obviously you have never had child athletes:D Obviously the ones whining about this have not either. Sports in high school is a class......you can't pick and choose when you want to show up to any other class can you:confused:

[MissDiva1]

And most of those are taken by the actually schooling the child is in school for. You really can't be advocating that it's okay to take a child out of school for a vacation as long as it doesn't interfere with sports?? Also, many jobs that parents have dictate when vacation can be taken, such as when a factory shuts down for two weeks and all workers must take their vacation then.

 

Easy answer.......don't sign up if you feel that your vacation trumps organized school sports........

Our child played baseball and basketball......we still vacationed in the off season during the summer.....

[friedshrimp]

Being a parent involves making sacrifices for your kids. If you don't want to be there to support your kids as they are growing up and just continue to live your life as you desire then don't have kids.

 

Family time can be any time. Those of you that take cruises to get family time, how much time do you actually spend together? I know my teens are off with friends they met quite a bit. The reason we cruise is that it allows each of us to do things we enjoy and still have time together. We do insist that dinner is together every night as well as time in ports. Other than that, we each do our own thing, sometimes that means being together, sometimes not.

 

The fact that my children have a roof over their heads, food in their stomachs, all of the necessities in life and some of the wants prove that my wife and I make sacrifices for our kids. How silly of you to state that if we do not want to bend over backwards for our kids and let their desires run the family that we shouldn't have kids. My kids understand that the times I can take vacation from my job is limited and therefore we will take a vacation, from school, sports, band, and other distractions when that time arises. None of them plan on making any sport or music a career, it's just something fun to do. We bust our butts getting them to and from practices and games but when vacation time comes, their sports and such get put on hold until our return. If they can't agree to that then the sports and music go bye-bye.

[jenwales]

I think it's like this:

 

Let's say you do taxes for a living. You aren't going to take off during your busiest time - Jan through April 15. Most likely, your boss is going to make that decision for you, but if you are a good employee you know that it would be silly to even consider a vacation at that time.

 

If your kid is a football player, you know that he is going to have tryouts then practice and games from August until November. It would be silly to plan a vacation during that time, but again, the coach (boss) is going to tell you that you can't do it.

 

If you don't want to have restrictions on your time, don't sign up for activities or jobs that will implement them.

[jenjens1023]

I think that school activities are SCHOOL activities, and should take place during the regular school year - meaning times when school is not officially out for holidays. Would the coach schedule games over Christmas break? How about summer holidays? Even if they did, though, it's still HOLIDAY time, not school time, and if a family has specificially chosen that time to leave town - so that their children do not miss school in most cases - threatening them with 'punishment' or expulsion from the team is just crappy, in my opinion.

 

There are many school activities that begin in the summer. Band camp is in July, football, soccer, tennis, cross country, and golf all start practices, and games, by early August. Swimming and basketball continue through Christmas break. The coach doesn't set these dates for the games, the state athletic department does.

 

Part of the problem with spring break is that different schools have different weeks off. It would make it almost impossible for those sports to have any games scheduled for several weeks.

[Martini Mom]

Wonder how much longer before this thread gets locked...:rolleyes: