Is this safe? or Against policy?

[itchin2cruz]

Hey its not how you get into a spot you are in, its how you deal with it and get out of it. I wish the best for you and your child.

 

You do the best you can and hope for the best

 

Lol thank you but he's no longer a child. He's almost 18! We both turned out just fine!

[babyher]

Lol thank you but he's no longer a child. He's almost 18! We both turned out just fine!

 

Now see there I have you beat :)

 

My youngest is 18. Then I have a 26, 24, and 19 yr old.

WEll actually the 26 and 19 year old are mine . The other two are DWs , but we have been one big happy for a pretty long time and all of them have turned out pretty terrific.

 

Mom and Dad are a little shaky sometimes *LOL* But the kids are doing fine :)

[newcatintown]

At 17 I had graduated high school, was going to college, working a part time job , and driving a car (albeit an old clunker) I paid for myself.

 

But God forbid I would have been left home alone for TWO WHOLE DAYS :)

 

 

Who would have washed me and fed me and kept me from walking out into traffic?

 

and at 17 I, too, had graduated, working a full time job, driving a car I paid for and living alone in another state. oh, the horror :eek:

[saskcruiser]

Most 12 year olds where I am from take their first aid course as well as their babysitting course. It was previously mentioned about all the strangers and that the crew are strangers as well, does that not include the babysitters that Carnival provides?:confused:

 

I would have no problem allowing my 12yo relative that has been properly trained watch over my two year old that is in bed.

[metsfan1968]

I also graduated at 17 and worked a full-time job while putting myself through college, was married with a kid at 19, and bought my house at 21 (meaning I was working a full-time job, going to school, and helping to raise my kid while paying all the bills, providing a roof over our heads, etc., etc. at a young age)… so I agree people can take on responsibilities at a young age when necessary … and maturity is an individual thing. But that wasn’t the point of my post. These were the points:

First – Cruise lines do not typically let you book a stateroom that doesn’t have at least one adult in it. My guess is this is done due to liability issues. So, it’s not a stretch for the OP to wonder if the cruise line had a policy of not leaving children unattended in the stateroom… because again, should something happen, maybe the cruise line could be held liable.

Second – Many people think it’s ok for their 18 year old child to drink alcohol, or for people of any age to smoke pot. They’re both still against the law. So, I was curious about what the legal view of this scenario might be and figured I’d share what I found. I wasn’t suggesting these are the “rules” that every parent has to follow or even saying that I agree or disagree with them, but they appear to be the basis a CPS agency will use to evaluate an investigation. So, I thought they were relevant to the discussion. That’s it.

[maggie cruises]

So can some adults:rolleyes:

 

maybe..maybe not

[maggie cruises]

On one cruise there was a guy that was at the craps table every night with myself and a couple of other regulars. This guy could drink like a dehydrated camel and was pretty much drunk by 6pm every night. He was a happy drunk, was never ugly or rude and was a blast to "throw" the dice with.

 

One night around 1am I was coming back from my late night cigar (don't start :rolleyes:) and I ran into him and his 11 year old daughter. It turned out that when he hadn't made it to the room by 12pm which was there set time for him to be back in the room, she went to look for him and found him drunk wandering around the boat.

 

The next day I saw him at dinner and I asked how he felt. As you would expect he was a hung over and not feeling so great. I made a comment about his daughter coming to his rescue and he said that she is such a great kid and that he would be lost without her. :eek:

 

My point of this story is that this young girl was much more responsible then her alcoholic dad any day of the week. Not that I approve of how the father behaved but it shows that there are kids out there that can be much more responsible than some adults.

 

true..the child did seem responsible..how could she not be with a father that drank so often and so much...she was unfortunately thrown into an adult situation of being responsible for her father...that is actually quite sad

 

 

But that begs another question to be asked...Just where was the 11 yo until 11pm? In Camp C? In her room? where? AND Was she told to stay in her room and not leave on her own? Regardless...the 11yo was roaming the ship at midnight.....the father should be ashamed..and the "mature" daughter was also roaming the ship at midnight.....you tell me..does that make her responsible or does it make her a frightened child in search of her drunk dad? She should have stayed put in her cabin and called the ships security to locate her father.

 

While you call her a responsible child..I think a better description is an irresponsible child who should have known NOT to roam the ship at midnight looking for him but should have called security...

 

And the moral is...even kids that we think are mature enough to handle certain situations...do not make the right decision at times...like this girl..

[B and C Blake]

I also graduated at 17 and worked a full-time job while putting myself through college, was married with a kid at 19, and bought my house at 21 (meaning I was working a full-time job, going to school, and helping to raise my kid while paying all the bills, providing a roof over our heads, etc., etc. at a young age)… so I agree people can take on responsibilities at a young age when necessary … and maturity is an individual thing. But that wasn’t the point of my post. These were the points:

First – Cruise lines do not typically let you book a stateroom that doesn’t have at least one adult in it. My guess is this is done due to liability issues. So, it’s not a stretch for the OP to wonder if the cruise line had a policy of not leaving children unattended in the stateroom… because again, should something happen, maybe the cruise line could be held liable.

Second – Many people think it’s ok for their 18 year old child to drink alcohol, or for people of any age to smoke pot. They’re both still against the law. So, I was curious about what the legal view of this scenario might be and figured I’d share what I found. I wasn’t suggesting these are the “rules” that every parent has to follow or even saying that I agree or disagree with them, but they appear to be the basis a CPS agency will use to evaluate an investigation. So, I thought they were relevant to the discussion. That’s it.

 

Thank you for the voice of reason. As I stated I'm not a whistle blower nor a tattle-tail as 1 person implied. ( if that were the case I would have posted entire review not only that which I am questioning.)

I am merely looking for opinions as I am planning a family cruise reunion. Yes I have some not so intelligent members great-nieces that have young children and would think this was OK. I searched Carnival FAQ's and did not find an answer about policy of leaving kids in balcony unattended.

If posters would read or skim they would know why I posted this thread instead of jumping to conclusions like they have done.

 

Thank You everyone for your thoughts. IMHO babysitting in a HOME environment is different then babysitting in a strange one. Especially one that has so much to explore.

[Razor_Poke]

I can't read through this whole thread, but I'm ok with a 12 year old watching his baby brother.

 

Many years ago when I was 12, I remember staying out until dark which was the point when my parents might start to worry. I rode a bike without a chain guard, elbow / knee pads or a helmet. And the most awful thing I did was carry a shotgun or 22 rifle down the road to get to the woods and hunt by myself. Let a 12 year old carry a firearm today out in public and wait on the news helicopters to start hovering over his house as the psycholgists analyze everything wrong in the kid's life. I actually took a pistol (not at 12 but later) to high school one day to show it to my PRINCIPAL. He offered to buy it:eek:

 

I'm fine with keeping the kids safe, and I realize that what is different today is that there are wierdo's that will harm children out there now.

 

But back on topic, these kids are going to be in locked room within a few hundered feet of mom and dad, most likely sound asleep. They'll be ok.

[maggie cruises]

LOL! My neighbor drove his son to college everyday:D

 

so what? Was public transportation avaialable? If so..that is an option you know...but not every college kid has the money or inclination to buy a car. It makes more sense to drive the kid to school than to pay for a car so he can drive himself...and maybe just maybe both the parent and student felt the money was better spent on tuition than a car.

 

 

I have known many parents who are able thankfully to drive their kids to college on a daily basis...and the kids aren't kicking and screaming about it either....they just may be trying to be fiscally responsible young adults.

 

I applaud parents who DONT encourage their kids to buy a car and who don't buy them for the kids.....

 

public transportation is excellent as well as dropping off and picking up if that is the feesible thing to do....

[debster11]

My daughter was 12 when she started babysitting. She went to a babysitting course run by the Red Cross and I would have no problem trusting her to care for a 2 year old. A 9 year old on the other hand I would have a problem with. Children mature at different levels and with my daughter, she is 13 going on 25. Very very responsible.

[babyher]

true..the child did seem responsible..how could she not be with a father that drank so often and so much...she was unfortunately thrown into an adult situation of being responsible for her father...that is actually quite sad

 

 

But that begs another question to be asked...Just where was the 11 yo until 11pm? In Camp C? In her room? where? AND Was she told to stay in her room and not leave on her own? Regardless...the 11yo was roaming the ship at midnight.....the father should be ashamed..and the "mature" daughter was also roaming the ship at midnight.....you tell me..does that make her responsible or does it make her a frightened child in search of her drunk dad? She should have stayed put in her cabin and called the ships security to locate her father.

 

While you call her a responsible child..I think a better description is an irresponsible child who should have known NOT to roam the ship at midnight looking for him but should have called security...

 

And the moral is...even kids that we think are mature enough to handle certain situations...do not make the right decision at times...like this girl..

 

Its one way of looking at it.

 

As sad as it is , it just might be the way it is in their home. I bartended a lot of years and have to say I have seen that family scenario a few times before .

 

The poster said he wasn't a bad guy. Actually a sweet guy with problem. he obviously loves his little girl and she loves him.

 

She has obviously done this before and knows how to handle him. His little girl is coming to get him and he knows its time to call it a night. Calling a security guard coukld be like calling a cop. She wouldn't want her dad to get in trouble she just wants him to get to bed and be safe .

 

You get some wanna be Blue Knight security guard , it could get comfrontational and make matters worse.

[maggie cruises]

Its one way of looking at it.

 

As sad as it is , it just might be the way it is in their home. I bartended a lot of years and have to say I have seen that family scenario a few times before .

 

The poster said he wasn't a bad guy. Actually a sweet guy with problem. he obviously loves his little girl and she loves him.

 

She has obviously done this before and knows how to handle him. His little girl is coming to get him and he knows its time to call it a night. Calling a security guard coukld be like calling a cop. She wouldn't want her dad to get in trouble she just wants him to get to bed and be safe .

 

You get some wanna be Blue Knight security guard , it could get comfrontational and make matters worse.

You are correct about the security guard and I am no fan of CCL security....

 

but still the girl was out on her own at midnight..doing the right thing in her mind..but I do wonder if she was under strict orders NOT to leave her room and she did anyway. We will never know...and I wonder if she knew the potential dangers to herself.

 

I also wonder why the person that posted this scenario would use such positive adjectives when describing this drunk guy...OK...maybe he is what some call a lovable drunk..but as soon as it surfaces how he is caring for his 11yo....and while we all want to believe he just loves her so much...he can't really love and care for her all that much if he gets drunk and doesn't return back to the cabin and to check on her....and leaves her to fend for herself..

 

 

there really is no defending this man......seriously

[babyher]

You are correct about the security guard and I am no fan of CCL security....

 

but still the girl was out on her own at midnight..doing the right thing in her mind..but I do wonder if she was under strict orders NOT to leave her room and she did anyway. We will never know...and I wonder if she knew the potential dangers to herself.

 

I also wonder why the person that posted this scenario would use such positive adjectives when describing this drunk guy...OK...maybe he is what some call a lovable drunk..but as soon as it surfaces how he is caring for his 11yo....and while we all want to believe he just loves her so much...he can't really love and care for her all that much if he gets drunk and doesn't return back to the cabin and to check on her....and leaves her to fend for herself..

 

 

there really is no defending this man......seriously

 

Not defending the man or his actions or his illness .

 

Like I said bartended a lot of years and there are happy drunks. They are mean, they aren't abusive , they don't start fights . They like to have a good time, know a ton of jokes and old songs and are just the life of the party.

 

I have also known some really great people that turn into monsters after they take a few drinks. Its the nature of the illness.

 

Not defending him , I just understand what the poster meant about him.

[MissDiva1]

so what? Was public transportation avaialable? If so..that is an option you know...but not every college kid has the money or inclination to buy a car. It makes more sense to drive the kid to school than to pay for a car so he can drive himself...and maybe just maybe both the parent and student felt the money was better spent on tuition than a car.

 

 

I have known many parents who are able thankfully to drive their kids to college on a daily basis...and the kids aren't kicking and screaming about it either....they just may be trying to be fiscally responsible young adults.

 

I applaud parents who DONT encourage their kids to buy a car and who don't buy them for the kids.....

 

public transportation is excellent as well as dropping off and picking up if that is the feesible thing to do....

 

The mother drove him to school in HIS car. Yes the son has a car. When he got his first job out of the city where he lived........his mother and father drove him to work......theis was just a couple months ago. He is 21 years old. He finally now gets to drive to work by himself.

He has been sheltered all his life. He is 21 and has the maturity of a 14 year old.......

[babyher]

The mother drove him to school in HIS car. Yes the son has a car. When he got his first job out of the city where he lived........his mother and father drove him to work......theis was just a couple months ago. He is 21 years old. He finally now gets to drive to work by himself.

He has been sheltered all his life. He is 21 and has the maturity of a 14 year old.......

 

 

 

 

WOW

 

 

You better tell your neighbor Mrs. Bates that if she doesn't let go , Little Norman is going to have a sick obsession with Taxidermy and women in showers *LOL*

[MissDiva1]

maybe..maybe not

 

:confused:

[MissDiva1]

WOW

 

 

You better tell your neighbor Mrs. Bates that if she doesn't let go , Little Norman is going to have a sick obsession with Taxidermy and women in showers *LOL*

 

It really is sad......nice kid too.....

[itchin2cruz]

WOW

 

 

You better tell your neighbor Mrs. Bates that if she doesn't let go , Little Norman is going to have a sick obsession with Taxidermy and women in showers *LOL*

 

Hey I resemble that! My cousin is a taxidermist lmao

[itchin2cruz]

The mother drove him to school in HIS car. Yes the son has a car. When he got his first job out of the city where he lived........his mother and father drove him to work......theis was just a couple months ago. He is 21 years old. He finally now gets to drive to work by himself.

He has been sheltered all his life. He is 21 and has the maturity of a 14 year old.......

 

I was the wife of a sheltered kid. They don't make good husbands. True story. Couldn't do a darned thing without momma, including pay his bills.

[Ratt]

You are correct about the security guard and I am no fan of CCL security....

 

but still the girl was out on her own at midnight..doing the right thing in her mind..but I do wonder if she was under strict orders NOT to leave her room and she did anyway. We will never know...and I wonder if she knew the potential dangers to herself.

 

I also wonder why the person that posted this scenario would use such positive adjectives when describing this drunk guy...OK...maybe he is what some call a lovable drunk..but as soon as it surfaces how he is caring for his 11yo....and while we all want to believe he just loves her so much...he can't really love and care for her all that much if he gets drunk and doesn't return back to the cabin and to check on her....and leaves her to fend for herself..

 

 

there really is no defending this man......seriously

 

 

While I didn't know the guy before the cruise I did get to know him and some of the people that he was on the cruise with. There was a large family celebrating a special occasion so there were parents, kids, and grand kids. This guy was a very close family friend who had been raised by the parents from time he was a young teenager when his parents were killed in a car accident (I think he was 15). Later he married had kids and had a great life. Then his wife was diagnosed with cancer of which she later died from. I know there were strangers and could have made it up but it is what it is.

 

The entire family knew how the guy was and they accepted him for the way he was. From what they told me he had had a pretty hard life before his parents died and when they died it made it even worse. They said that the death of his wife was really like part of him died. I really was amazed at how nice and happy the guy was considering what he had been through.

 

As for his daughter. I had met her and her brother who was 14 and they were both mature beyond their ages. Of course they would considering what they had been through and what they were dealing with. From what others in the family told me, he would drink regularly but he was never an out of control drunk. When I said he was wandering the ship it was meant as "he was drunk and wandering around the ship checking it out" not "he was wandering around the ship so drunk he didn't know where he was or how he got there". In my opinion the daughter was in no way scared when I saw he in the hall that night. She was smiling and I would even say she thought it was a little funny that she had to "rescue" her own dad. Every time I saw her and or her brother and they were speaking to an adult be it a family member or ship staff they would say "yes sir" or "yes ma'am". They were obviously raised well and were part of a very close and loving family.

 

As for her being allowed to be out and about on the ship late at night looking for her dad? I have a 24 year son and I wouldn't have let him do it at 11 years old! I would have allowed him to go to and from places with another child in the same age range during the day and early evening hours but never alone. I'm not saying other parents shouldn't but that I wouldn't.

 

As has been said on this and many other threads about kids on cruise ships, parents have to make the decision about what the children can and can't do. Each child is different just as the things that parents allow the children to do are different. Some parents thinks it fine for their child to walk around the ship by them self while others will think that that is close to being child abuse. My DW and I know that raising our son is the greatest responsibility that we will every have. While we agreed most of the time while we raised him, there were plenty of times that we disagreed. While most parents wouldn't allow an 11 year old to wander around a cruise ship at night, there are those that don't have a problem with it. If you came across this situation and felt it was wrong and want to say something to the person or to report the situation to ship security I wouldn't have a problem with that as it is your choice to do so. I didn't think there was a problem and I left it at that.

 

I hope all that makes sense. Sorry for the book :eek:

 

Hugh

[skylock]

While I didn't know the guy before the cruise I did get to know him and some of the people that he was on the cruise with. There was a large family celebrating a special occasion so there were parents, kids, and grand kids. This guy was a very close family friend who had been raised by the parents from time he was a young teenager when his parents were killed in a car accident (I think he was 15). Later he married had kids and had a great life. Then his wife was diagnosed with cancer of which she later died from. I know there were strangers and could have made it up but it is what it is.

 

The entire family knew how the guy was and they accepted him for the way he was. From what they told me he had had a pretty hard life before his parents died and when they died it made it even worse. They said that the death of his wife was really like part of him died. I really was amazed at how nice and happy the guy was considering what he had been through.

 

As for his daughter. I had met her and her brother who was 14 and they were both mature beyond their ages. Of course they would considering what they had been through and what they were dealing with. From what others in the family told me, he would drink regularly but he was never an out of control drunk. When I said he was wandering the ship it was meant as "he was drunk and wandering around the ship checking it out" not "he was wandering around the ship so drunk he didn't know where he was or how he got there". In my opinion the daughter was in no way scared when I saw he in the hall that night. She was smiling and I would even say she thought it was a little funny that she had to "rescue" her own dad. Every time I saw her and or her brother and they were speaking to an adult be it a family member or ship staff they would say "yes sir" or "yes ma'am". They were obviously raised well and were part of a very close and loving family.

 

As for her being allowed to be out and about on the ship late at night looking for her dad? I have a 24 year son and I wouldn't have let him do it at 11 years old! I would have allowed him to go to and from places with another child in the same age range during the day and early evening hours but never alone. I'm not saying other parents shouldn't but that I wouldn't.

 

As has been said on this and many other threads about kids on cruise ships, parents have to make the decision about what the children can and can't do. Each child is different just as the things that parents allow the children to do are different. Some parents thinks it fine for their child to walk around the ship by them self while others will think that that is close to being child abuse. My DW and I know that raising our son is the greatest responsibility that we will every have. While we agreed most of the time while we raised him, there were plenty of times that we disagreed. While most parents wouldn't allow an 11 year old to wander around a cruise ship at night, there are those that don't have a problem with it. If you came across this situation and felt it was wrong and want to say something to the person or to report the situation to ship security I wouldn't have a problem with that as it is your choice to do so. I didn't think there was a problem and I left it at that.

 

I hope all that makes sense. Sorry for the book :eek:

 

Hugh

 

I really wish you would quit defending this drunk guy. I don't care what his personal problems were, the fact is he was so drunk nightly his 11 yr old had to go find him at night to "bring him home". I am sure she was mature about it because it has probably been her way of life for a long time.

 

You need to unwrap yourself from his supposed problems and see it for what it really is.

[Tbay-eh]

I really wish you would quit defending this drunk guy. I don't care what his personal problems were, the fact is he was so drunk nightly his 11 yr old had to go find him at night to "bring him home". I am sure she was mature about it because it has probably been her way of life for a long time.

 

You need to unwrap yourself from his supposed problems and see it for what it really is.

 

I tend to agree with you - to take a young girl on a vacation of a life time and this is what she has to do, it is so sad. Some kids are not allowed to mature, some mature naturally and others are forced to - oh what a world we live in.

[Ratt]

I really wish you would quit defending this drunk guy. I don't care what his personal problems were, the fact is he was so drunk nightly his 11 yr old had to go find him at night to "bring him home". I am sure she was mature about it because it has probably been her way of life for a long time.

 

You need to unwrap yourself from his supposed problems and see it for what it really is.

 

In what way did I defend the guy? I stated what the family had told me the guy had been through. I didn't say that it was an excuse for his behavior. If you didn't notice I used an :eek: in the statement were he was saying he would be lost without his daughter. In cause you don't know, that represents shock or surprise. That in it self should let you know that I didn't approve.

[skylock]

In what way did I defend the guy? I stated what the family had told me the guy had been through. I didn't say that it was an excuse for his behavior. If you didn't notice I used an :eek: in the statement were he was saying he would be lost without his daughter. In cause you don't know, that represents shock or surprise. That in it self should let you know that I didn't approve.

 

If you were not sympathanizing with the guy you would not have taken the time to type out his life story as told to you by other family members.

 

To make sure I wasn't mis accusing you, I went back and reread your post. I could use a few shock faces myself. You are so sympatathic to this sorry excuse for a dad I am actually wondering why that would be.

 

THEN you go on about how well the children have been brought up. Yes ma'am, no ma'am. Clearly implying that while this poor excuse of a dad was a drunk lush requiring his eleven yr old to go look for him at night, he was doing an excellent job on raising his poor children.

 

Give me a break.