Cruising with others - tips??

[neosmom]

DH and I have always cruised by ourselves, but his sister and her husband asked if they could cruise with us. So...we're booked on the Ecstasy next April. I want to make sure they have a great time, but on the other hand, don't want to feel joined at the hip! Any tips on cruising with another couple? Thanks in advance for the help!

[Cruzin2paradise09]

Cruised with friends once ... unfortunately, they are no longer our friends, but that's us.

 

When we were in the planning stages, and this was their first cruise, we tried to give them all the great 'heads-up' tips we learned on our first cruise and on CC. We also told them that we understood we have different taste on what we like to do and that it would be fun to meet up at dinner, discuss our days and see what night-life we wanted to do together.

 

It didn't work out so well. But, the bottom line is to just communicate with them alot.

[H82seaUgo]

DH and I have always cruised by ourselves, but his sister and her husband asked if they could cruise with us. So...we're booked on the Ecstasy next April. I want to make sure they have a great time, but on the other hand, don't want to feel joined at the hip! Any tips on cruising with another couple? Thanks in advance for the help!

 

we did this a bunch of times with another couple. as far as what to do, we did it democratically. unanimous and 3 votes won.

 

a 50 / 50 split, and we did just that, split, with plans to meet up later.

 

if you need help deciding, bring a yellow and a blue marker; one for you, and one for the other couple.

 

use the funtimes to highlite anything you guys want to do each day, using the same sheet.

 

anything highlighted green, you will all just want to do together.

[flounder315]

I suggest ya'll make plans to meet for breakfast. Have the funtimes paper with you so ya'll can decide what your going to do that day and decide when and where to meet up if ya'll want to do something together.

[k2]

WE always cruise with friends and family. This time we are adding friends that have never cruised. My approach is to set up the atmosphere before we go. We link for dinner so we at least have an opportunity to spend time together there. I am a planner, I involve whoever wants to be involved in this stage. Once I decide what I am doing for excursions, I send the information to everyone, let them know that I am doing this and ask if they want to join us. Give them a deadline for a decision and let them know that you will not be offended if they are not interested. I also take time to make sure that everyone understands that there is no preconceived commitment to each other on a daily basis, we will decide what we want to do and anyone can join us if they wish. We all take this approach and it works out great. Sometimes we join them, sometimes they join us, sometimes we are in a large group, sometimes we all head off in different directions. Just be open with each other and don't take anything personal. It is nice to have people you know to share the experience with... Have a great time!

[sparkscruiser]

We've cruised with other couples and large groups as well. Our philosphy was to meet up before the cruise to discuss excursion and the like and provide some tips and once we were onboard - we did some stuff together, and some stuff all by ourselves. This worked out well as we were linked for dinner seating at a large table and we all shared our day with each other and the rest of the folks at the table. It was a lot of fun. One couple we met years ago on our Triumph cruise are joining us on our upcoming Dream cruise.... and we met them on these boards!

[MamaParrotHead]

I'm the "group leader" for all of our cruises. It started with one other couple and has been as large as 50 people from all over the country and Europe. I basically plan my own cruise. Let everyone know what we're planning and lay it out AHEAD OF TIME that NO ONE IS OBLIGATED to do ANYTHING. Although everyone is welcome, they can do their own excursions if they want to. They can eat as a family/couple rather than with the larger group. I let them know that I'm more than willing to lay out a few alternate options if they're not into what we're planning (as far as cabin, excursions, dining options, sea day activities, whatever). As long as you go into it with the ground rules (good-naturedly) laid out ahead of time, things will most likely run smoothly.

[serene56]

I let people know whats happening-- and what I am going to do-

 

Under no obligation is any one made to do things I want to do. We will meet up at dinner-- but if you want to do the buffet-- thats fine too.

 

Ship is not that big that I will not be seeing you at sometime or another.

[CupKayke]

We just got back from a trip with the in-laws. It was so-so. :rolleyes:

 

Things we would absolutely insist if we EVER traveled with family again...

 

*everyone makes their way to/fro the cruise on their own... get your own flights and your own hotel and do your own thing and meet on the ship

 

*do whatever you want on the cruise all day long and we'll all meet for dinner every night and share stories

 

*excursions together are completely optional - don't be bullied or talked into doing something you know you won't like - you will regret it!

 

We had a good time but the problem for us was their style of travel versus ours... they insisted on a non-smoking hotel in Beverly Hills whereas we wanted a smoking hotel in LA - and their son smokes (so do they but that's another story)... their idea of a good excursion is sitting in a van or on a bus all day looking out the window which equals our idea of a horrible excursion... they wanted early dining, we wanted late so anytime worked to please both of us around 7:00pm... they don't eat dessert and we do - and eating dessert is a bit of a taboo for their family (eating disorders)... they wanted to get to the airport ~3 hours prior to departure and we were fine with 2 hours... they wanted to spend all day long in an SUV with relatives driving down Sunset Strip and we were miserable doing so...etc...

 

Hubby & I had a good cruise and his parents, in the end, were fine to travel with and most went well however, there was so much ugliness about the hotel situation months and weeks before we traveled that we both promised each other we will never travel with family again - under any circumstances - even if it's a free trip to China - which seriously could be coming-up as a Christmas gift this year. :( I REALLY wanna do China... but we will NOT do it if it's going to be 1/2 miserable. Live and learn.

 

Which reminds me... my sister and her husband want to cruise the Bahamas with us this Spring and as much as I would love-love-love that cruise and to spend that time with my sister.... my husband would greatly dislike it as they do not drink or smoke under any circumstances. It would be uncomfortable for hubby and I and we already made our promise about no more trips with family, thanks to his mom. :( I think a BIG group of people traveling with lots of diversification and some going here and some going there would be better than just two couples... but your opinion and experience may be different. Good luck!!

[GloriaF]

I found this thread of interest because we, who usually cruise alone, are going on a cruise with our adult son and his wife. We love them and they love us, but we all acknowledge that we will want and need some separate time. I've tried to take notice of all tips.

 

This is their first cruise, and our first Carnival cruise although we have several cruises under out belt. I sent our d-i-l the link to CC and she has learned so much more than we knew before our first cruise.

 

Our cabins are side by side, and we plan to take walkie-talkies so we can keep up with one another on the ship or in port. Also some post-it notes to leave on the door or in the mailbox, depending on the set-up for the Ecstasy. And we plan to encourage the use of the "Do Not Disturb" door hangers for private times for all of us.

 

We will probably meet up for breakfast on port days, and have our dining time linked with theirs, so we will definitely be together at dinner. As for being in port, we will leave the ship together and may split up once onshore. The evening entertainment is up for discussion - DH and I love production shows, the "kids" may want to do something livelier and that is fine with us.

[Gtownmom]

Cruising with others is fun!! BUT, It can get sooooo involved "discussing" options. UGH We now let everyone know what excursions we have booked before the cruise. They can join or not.

 

We highlight a copy of the fun times where we think we might be any given time... but no guarantee...we drop it in their mailbox on the way to breakfast.

 

We always meet for assigned time dinner, and most of the time go to a show afterwards together.

 

What works for us... It's YOUR vacation and MY vacation. Where our vacations cross is awesome!

[Geebee8]

We cruise with my parents every year and have a great time!! Mom and I like to shop while DH and Dad like to people watch so it works out great!!! We will always leave notes for each other (slip under the door) if we are heading to the pool, show, etc. and if we meet up, that's fine and if not, see you at dinner!! We also try to sit in the same area and same time at the buffet for breakfast so we can meet up in the morning and decide what the day will hold for us if there aren't any excursions planned.

 

Just don't stress too much - it's everyone's vacation and not everyone likes to do the same things.:)

[neosmom]

Thanks so much for all of the great tips!

[CanadianTwosome]

The most important - VITAL - discussion to have with your sister and her husband prior to the cruise is the one about not having to be joined at the hip!! Nobody should feel obligated to do anything they don't want to do just because someone else in the party wants to do it. The beauty of having a couple of extra bodies along though, is that the same can be applied between spouses. If you and your sister want to do something that neither husband wants to do, you've got someone to do it with - and the boys may find something you're not interested in also.

 

You do NOT have to take the same excursions. You do NOT have to eat every meal together (this will be affected by your choice for traditional or anytime dining). You do NOT have to participate in the same on-board activities. You do NOT have to make the same entertainment choices. Obviously you CAN do all of these things, but you're all adults and nobody wants to spend their hard earned vacation dollars to have someone else's idea of a vacation.

 

We had a group of 13 on a cruise a few years ago, and the only time we were all in the same place at the same time was on one of the formal nights when we all got together to eat and then take a group photo. On my birthday 'most' of us took a day sail in Cozumel and went to a specialty restaurant for supper, but three missed the day sail and two missed the supper. Even though it was my birthday, I was happy that nobody felt obligated to join me in activities of MY choosing.

 

We did most of our 'scheduling' on the fly on that trip, and it was on NCL, so if we decided that some of us wanted to dine together, we could just do it at a moment's notice. While we were planning, anyone who found an interesting looking excursion would share it with the group in case anyone else was interested. Whenever we'd get together with someone else, it was always interesting to hear about what they'd done and seen.

 

Since we have always travelled with our daughter, and at least half of our cruises my mom has been along, we've gotten into the habit of checking the daily as soon as we have access to it in the evening so that we can make plans for the next day if there's something people want to do. It will depend on how you spend your evenings whether you do that in the evening or in the morning, but breakfast is a great time to get together and figure it out also - and if you see something the night before that starts early you can always call the other cabin. One of the great things about having companions along is that if one of you doesn't want to do something, you've got two more people along who might. :)

 

Just remember, their good time is not your responsibility and yours is not theirs. :)

[grgsgrl]

I'm the "group leader" for all of our cruises. It started with one other couple and has been as large as 50 people from all over the country and Europe. I basically plan my own cruise. Let everyone know what we're planning and lay it out AHEAD OF TIME that NO ONE IS OBLIGATED to do ANYTHING. Although everyone is welcome, they can do their own excursions if they want to. They can eat as a family/couple rather than with the larger group. I let them know that I'm more than willing to lay out a few alternate options if they're not into what we're planning (as far as cabin, excursions, dining options, sea day activities, whatever). As long as you go into it with the ground rules (good-naturedly) laid out ahead of time, things will most likely run smoothly.

 

 

We rarely cruise with less then 10 people. I am in 100% agreement with Mama Parrothead. I do basically what she does.

I am a control freak and love everything planned out. I tell everyone what I have found, get opinions, make final counts for excursions, collect the $$ but always stress that if you do not want to it is NOT a big deal - It is your vacation too and you can do what you want. Makes for a really good time and no hurt feelings

[CupKayke]

By the way... a GROUP cruise is a little different than family/close friends... I planned a group cruise for a total of 32 co-workers/friends and their family members in 2007. My first cruise and almost all of their first cruises too. I arranged a bus to take us from our town to the port and back and an all-day beach excursion for everyone (who wanted too, about 90%) in Cozumel... and everyone had tables together at dinner.

 

IT WENT FANTASTIC!! Some of those first-timers are now second and even third time cruisers. Several of them still call me or see me in town and ask me when I am going to do a group cruise again. They all thanked me and bought me gifts, etc. It was a good cruise for all with only some very minor hangups. I would do a group cruise like that again in a heartbeat!!

 

I think family is entirely different ...you feel more obligated to do things others want you too.. which puts a damper on vacation, IMHO. :(

[Gayle V]

We highlight a copy of the fun times where we think we might be any given time... but no guarantee...we drop it in their mailbox on the way to breakfast.

 

We always meet for assigned time dinner, and most of the time go to a show afterwards together.

 

What a great idea! We are cruising with good friends again, in February. We always meet for dinner and the show, just like you. And plan ahead, one excursion to do together. But I like your idea for using the Fun Times to mark places where we can connect during the rest of the day. They are early risers and we sleep late. So if we each do this, it would be perfect. I especially like the "no guarantee" part of the plan.

 

Thank you.

[H82seaUgo]

By the way... a GROUP cruise is a little different than family/close friends... I planned a group cruise for a total of 32 co-workers/friends and their family members in 2007. My first cruise and almost all of their first cruises too. I arranged a bus to take us from our town to the port and back and an all-day beach excursion for everyone (who wanted too, about 90%) in Cozumel... and everyone had tables together at dinner.

 

IT WENT FANTASTIC!! Some of those first-timers are now second and even third time cruisers. Several of them still call me or see me in town and ask me when I am going to do a group cruise again. They all thanked me and bought me gifts, etc. It was a good cruise for all with only some very minor hangups. I would do a group cruise like that again in a heartbeat!!

 

I think family is entirely different ...you feel more obligated to do things others want you too.. which puts a damper on vacation, IMHO. :(

 

i just like all those little perks they throw at you on board! :D

[elzapato]

We cruised with my parents a few years back and it worked out great-we always ended up having dinner together (no one felt obligated but we happen to like eating around the same time) and if we happened to be on the same excursions then great but if not it gave us something to compare notes on at the end of the day. We would give each other a heads-up the night before on what we planned to do the next day. We were surprised on how often we ran in to each other on the ship. I'd leave a note on their door if we went to breakfast before them and vice-versa. No waiting, just a great time.

[iTouch]

We cruise with family and close friends all the time. We all must be easy because all of us just go with the flow. But we do things at home together all the time also. Having the same things in common help. If I had to set someone down and set rules or if they had to do that with me.......we wouldn't be friends period. We don't hang with drama llamas.....

[Mekamax]

SORRY - BUT DISCUSSION about NOT being JOINED AT THE HIP - DOESN'T WORK~!!!! We did this and they agreed and when they hit a ship with 2000 people they didn't know guess where they were??? At our hip! So we found another couple and introduced them and more or less thankfully got them to go their own way with the other couple. They were worried that we would feel left out and we just laughed to ourselves... :D We travel best alone. We love to meet new people and do and old friends tend to get jealous that we are not spending all our time with them. One time we had about 4 couples in the hot tub having drinks that we had met between the airport and excursions and the old friends were jealous - to us the more the merrier on a cruise - we just want to relax. We also will do our own thing - meet up for dinner fine but they didnt' like this even when we planned it out ahead of time. We did this with friends twice - the first time was a disaster and the second we pawned them off on another couple when they got attached to us and it gave us breathing room and worked ok. BUT when we got home they started making up stories about the cruise that were not flattering (and they were made up) to people we knew. SO with Facebook and all it would not be very relaxing if they were going to post everytime you did even the tiniest thing.

 

BO NOT GET CABINS NEXT DOOR TO EACH OTHER - if things go wrong it is TOO close and the walls are thin so you can not only not talk about them but you also have to know they will hear everything you do.. :rolleyes:

[hockeyluver]

DH and I have always cruised by ourselves, but his sister and her husband asked if they could cruise with us. So...we're booked on the Ecstasy next April. I want to make sure they have a great time, but on the other hand, don't want to feel joined at the hip! Any tips on cruising with another couple? Thanks in advance for the help!

 

We have cruised with a group of friends the last 4 cruises, the one thing we all stress is.. if you want to do something go do it, ask if others want to join, if not dont worry about it. It is your vacation too. One year 5 of us went ziplining the other 3 didnt want to go so they found other things to do in port.

 

also the first day on the cruise we usually meet up at the aft lido bar, of the 10 of us we are the only platinum couple so since we get v.i.p and they dont, we know where to meet up once on the ship. This usually becomes our daytime gathering place, our evening one is in the casino since i gamble and one couple that comes with us smokes. My hubby and girlfriend love the shows, me and her hubby dont so we usually hang out while they are at the show, our adult kids are usually at the disco and the senior couple is in bed by 9 :O

[iTouch]

BO NOT GET CABINS NEXT DOOR TO EACH OTHER - if things go wrong it is TOO close and the walls are thin so you can not only not talk about them but you also have to know they will hear everything you do.. :rolleyes:

 

This is our favorite thing to do.....3 cabins in a row and open of up the balcony dividers.

[H82seaUgo]

BO NOT GET CABINS NEXT DOOR TO EACH OTHER - if things go wrong it is TOO close and the walls are thin so you can not only not talk about them but you also have to know they will hear everything you do.. :rolleyes:

 

truer words were never typed! and above all, do not open your balcony partition between yas!

[skitraveller]

Cruising in a group can be very rewarding but watch out for the hangers-on! Tip is to IDENTIFY THEM EARLY :)

We have successfully cruised in groups but you always get one or 2 that smoother you, that want to be in your very shadow yet talk over you because they have 'done everything' way better, these types have very deep pockets that cash rarely sees the light of day.

 

Oh & if you are a scuba diver.....check your new buddies dive credentials carefully BEFORE you get into the water :eek:

 

Lay out boundaries & if all else fails lock yourself on your balcony with a bottle of your favorite drop!

 

Above all, just smile through it all cause it will have everyone guessing!