loosing sleep and ready to sell my boarding pass

[cruisenotbooze]

i do trust the grandparents. my hubby and i go on weekend trips at least 3 times a year and they do an awesome job. i feel that my anxiety arises from the fact that i will loose all control if i cant even talk to them. but as i said, i will do what i need to do to talk to my babies, DH said that quote "dont worry about the money. we will do what we need to do dear so you can talk to the kiddos."

I am blessed to have such a great hubby :D

[maggie cruises]

i do trust the grandparents. my hubby and i go on weekend trips at least 3 times a year and they do an awesome job. i feel that my anxiety arises from the fact that i will loose all control if i cant even talk to them. but as i said, i will do what i need to do to talk to my babies, DH said that quote "dont worry about the money. we will do what we need to do dear so you can talk to the kiddos."

I am blessed to have such a great hubby :D

 

The money is such as non issue..seriously

 

What would bother me most is leaving my asthmatic child with smokers...

 

as a doctor..you must know of a nurse or nursing student that would be glad to come in to your home for a week to care for your ill child....and of course pay him/her at the going nursing rate...not babysitter rate.....

 

maybe even a med student...sounds better to me than grandparents who smoke.......because even if they smoke on the porch..which I doubt they will do...the house still smells as do their clothing.

 

 

I am really dumbfounded that the cost of the call and the inability to be in easy reach of the kids is your real concern....or couple time..or whatever.....

 

FWIW Doc...you are OK with leaving them with smokers? When the child has asthma? In your first post you yourself describe the child as being very ill.

 

I am not saying cancel your cruise...I am just suggesting that you leave your child with qualified medical people that can care properly for him.

[cruisenotbooze]

.

okay. thanks

[debster11]

The money is such as non issue..seriously

 

What would bother me most is leaving my asthmatic child with smokers...

 

as a doctor..you must know of a nurse or nursing student that would be glad to come in to your home for a week to care for your ill child....and of course pay him/her at the going nursing rate...not babysitter rate.....

 

maybe even a med student...sounds better to me than grandparents who smoke.......because even if they smoke on the porch..which I doubt they will do...the house still smells as do their clothing.

 

 

I am really dumbfounded that the cost of the call and the inability to be in easy reach of the kids is your real concern....or couple time..or whatever.....

 

FWIW Doc...you are OK with leaving them with smokers? When the child has asthma? In your first post you yourself describe the child as being very ill.

 

I am not saying cancel your cruise...I am just suggesting that you leave your child with qualified medical people that can care properly for him.

 

Do you really think the grandparents are going to blow smoke in this childs face? You don't even know these people. They may smoke outside and not in the house. Are you so perfect that you can be so judgemental?

 

OP, my son has asthma. He is 11 and was diagnosed at 9. It didn't take him long to know when he needed to either slow down, or when to use his inhaler. He knows his limits. I think your son will be fine. As long as he is on his meds, he should be ok.

 

Go and have a great time. Also, Carnival ships have their own cell tower so if you make sure you have international cell service, even for the week, your parents should be able to get in touch with you and you with them if need be. Usually cell service is cheaper then using ship to shore. I think mine charges around $2.99/min. Make sure you cancel the international when you get home though.

 

Have a fabulous cruise. Your son will be in good hands.

[WendyVF]

Our cell company (Verizon) allows you to add international coverage at no charge so that the calls are cheaper. The best deal is text messages. It's something like 10 cents a message to receive and 50 cents to send. It's a great way to touch base.

[DebJ14]

No time like the present to adjust to live with a kid with a chronic ailment. Otherwise, you will drive your self crazy when they go on sleepovers, go to school, church trips etc. As a doctor you should know that it is controllable with avoidance of triggers and medications when necessary. My kid was in 5th grade when diagnosed. He quickly learned to handle the episodes. Turns out his trigger were gluten and milk, but that was not diagnosed until he was much older. No more breathing or digestive problems for him as long as he avoids those foods, which he gladly does.

[maggie cruises]

Do you really think the grandparents are going to blow smoke in this childs face? You don't even know these people. They may smoke outside and not in the house. Are you so perfect that you can be so judgemental?

 

OP, my son has asthma. He is 11 and was diagnosed at 9. It didn't take him long to know when he needed to either slow down, or when to use his inhaler. He knows his limits. I think your son will be fine. As long as he is on his meds, he should be ok.

 

Go and have a great time. Also, Carnival ships have their own cell tower so if you make sure you have international cell service, even for the week, your parents should be able to get in touch with you and you with them if need be. Usually cell service is cheaper then using ship to shore. I think mine charges around $2.99/min. Make sure you cancel the international when you get home though.

 

Have a fabulous cruise. Your son will be in good hands.

 

the OP herself suggested bringing in a house sitter....with the child's medical issue...a person with medical training is a viable suggestion..and since she is a doctor it should not be as difficult for her to find someone with medical training as it might be for a layperson.

 

I find it interesting that people are telling this parent..who is a doctor...that her son will be fine...I am suggesting that...she is concerned...and as a doctor....maybe she should be...

 

To tell a medical person to go and have a good time and that her asthmatic son will be in good hands with 2 smokers is just as ridiculous as you saying that ..I don't know these people....of course I don't know these people...neither do you....so again...in reading the first post over...the OP herself calls the medical condition serious....based on that alone......it becomes a logical suggestion to suggest that leaving an asthmatic child with smokers does not seem wise...to my silly little non medical mind.

 

 

everyone here is so gun ho on saying..leave the kids...have a great time...you need couple time.....but very few have the guts to say what I am saying...

 

personally...who cares if anyone agrees with me.....but it doesn't take a brain surgeon to realize that leaving a recently "very ill" asthmatic child with smokers is not a good move....btw...in your second paragraph you do realize that you are giving the doc medical advice.....I guess you know better than her.....talk about judgemental.

 

The OP is expressing her concern......and wisely so

 

 

and btw...while I do not think they will blow smoke in his face...yes...they will smoke in the house.....and there is noting anyone can do to prevent that....

[debster11]

the OP herself suggested bringing in a house sitter....with the child's medical issue...a person with medical training is a viable suggestion..and since she is a doctor it should not be as difficult for her to find someone with medical training as it might be for a layperson.

 

I find it interesting that people are telling this parent..who is a doctor...that her son will be fine...I am suggesting that...she is concerned...and as a doctor....maybe she should be...

 

To tell a medical person to go and have a good time and that her asthmatic son will be in good hands with 2 smokers is just as ridiculous as you saying that ..I don't know these people....of course I don't know these people...neither do you....so again...in reading the first post over...the OP herself calls the medical condition serious....based on that alone......it becomes a logical suggestion to suggest that leaving an asthmatic child with smokers does not seem wise...to my silly little non medical mind.

 

 

everyone here is so gun ho on saying..leave the kids...have a great time...you need couple time.....but very few have the guts to say what I am saying...

 

personally...who cares if anyone agrees with me.....but it doesn't take a brain surgeon to realize that leaving a recently "very ill" asthmatic child with smokers is not a good move....btw...in your second paragraph you do realize that you are giving the doc medical advice.....I guess you know better than her.....talk about judgemental.

 

The OP is expressing her concern......and wisely so

 

 

and btw...while I do not think they will blow smoke in his face...yes...they will smoke in the house.....and there is noting anyone can do to prevent that....

 

I am not giving her medical advice. I am speaking from experience. I have a child with asthma. Do you? Do you know anything about asthma at all? If treated the child can lead a completely normal life. The only thing I agree with you about is the fact that I do not know the grandparents or the OP but for you to say that for sure they will smoke in the house with the child there is, using your words, ridiculous. You don't know that for sure. The OP herself said that his lungs were almost clear and he was going back to school. That is telling me the crisis is over. If he stays on his meds, SPEAKING FROM EXPERIENCE, he should be fine, but I don't know that for sure so don't throw that back in my face.

 

I am not saying you are wrong in your opinion, everyone has one and no ones is either right or wrong. I respect that.

[maggie cruises]

I am not giving her medical advice. I am speaking from experience. I have a child with asthma. Do you? Do you know anything about asthma at all? If treated the child can lead a completely normal life. The only thing I agree with you about is the fact that I do not know the grandparents or the OP but for you to say that for sure they will smoke in the house with the child there is, using your words, ridiculous. You don't know that for sure. The OP herself said that his lungs were almost clear and he was going back to school. That is telling me the crisis is over. If he stays on his meds, SPEAKING FROM EXPERIENCE, he should be fine, but I don't know that for sure so don't throw that back in my face.

 

I am not saying you are wrong in your opinion, everyone has one and no ones is either right or wrong. I respect that.

 

 

yep..have experience with asthma...

 

 

but the real clincher with this thread is...the OP is a doctor....and is concerned about leaving her asthmatic child with smokers....

 

and the truth is the OP..as a doctor....should be asking her colleagues for their advice....and I find it funny that she posted here at all....and would even consider making any sort of decision for her child's medical condition and her cruising based on any of our opinions.....

 

a little off the topic..but...why is everyone so quick to tell parents that they NEED to get away...even when said parent voices uneasiness about doing so? So easy for strangers to give advice, isn't it? And so easy for posters to ask advice..medical or otherwise... about their most precious asset...their kids....

 

 

No answer please...just a rhetorical question......

 

 

and btw...you do tell the OP to go and have a good time and that her son will be fine...how do you know he will be fine? You should have suggested she ask her colleagues their opinion.

[RuthlessBoss]

My two cents. Enough about grandparents smoking in the home. They can go outside like I do when I visit up north. I've been known to sit out in the cold and snow while I'm there. My grandkids have NO illness.

What no one has questioned is the fact the child got sick in a non smoking home!

He will have to learn management of his disease for the rest of his life.

Grandparents DO know how to drive a car to an emergency room if something arises. Likely not required because things are improved.

So, all you people being concerned about smoking grandparents need to step back.

And for the parents, go on your trip. An exaccerbation of asthma can occur at any time in the boy's life, or maybe never.

[RuthlessBoss]

i cant sleep! my son (8yrs) got very ill this past week. he just got dx with asthma, and its been rough!!! after 8 days, his lungs are sounding a lot better today and i expect him to be in school on monday.

 

so... as a result, i am no longer seeing myself soaking up the sun and having a grand ole time with hubby, I am seeing my child sick and no one can get in touch with me, or they get in touch with me and theres nothing i can do, or the g-parents dont even realize how sick he is and dont even bother to try to get in touch with me. im really freaking out!!!

 

i dont know if i am going.

 

when i booked.. i did not really think about my two kids not being able to contact me. i feel like a bad mom. cant really take them because its a family (my DH's) reunion trip and NO ONE else will take the kids. i dont want to be the rude one. if its kids free they want, i will comply.

 

PARENTS: what has been your experience with leaving the kids behind, how did you handle this? were you as freaked out about being so far away as i am?

any tips on how to make this a little less stressful? please? lol

I looked back at this first post. The boy still has 24 days to recover till you set sail:rolleyes:

[luv2sweat]

My son, now 19, has multiple chronic illnesses. As long as you make arrangments for your child to receive proper care, you should take the vacation. Yes, it can be hard to find care for a sick child, but it is important to rest, recharge and reconnect. We took vacations when DS was younger, and he was always in good hands.

 

DH and I just got back from a cruise. DS has been sick since the beginning of October when he reacted badly to a vaccine. He's in college, but we still made arrangements for him. The family doctor even gave him his home phone number in case DS needed anything. He did wind up with an ER visit while we were away, but was well taken care of. He even told us that it was more fun to be in the ER with his sister than with me!

 

So make the arrangements for his care and go and have a good time. Oh, one thing we always have done was to let our doctor know that we would be away and that if one of the children got sick so and so would be bringing them in and that he had permission to treat as necessary.

 

Wendy

[bplazo]

Whenever my daughter was ill my mother-in-law always insisting on taking care of my daughter and my daughter really enjoyed all the coddling and attention. So, I would think that your son should be find with his grandparents.

[bythehex]

yep..have experience with asthma...

 

 

but the real clincher with this thread is...the OP is a doctor....and is concerned about leaving her asthmatic child with smokers....

 

and the truth is the OP..as a doctor....should be asking her colleagues for their advice....and I find it funny that she posted here at all....and would even consider making any sort of decision for her child's medical condition and her cruising based on any of our opinions.....

 

a little off the topic..but...why is everyone so quick to tell parents that they NEED to get away...even when said parent voices uneasiness about doing so? So easy for strangers to give advice, isn't it? And so easy for posters to ask advice..medical or otherwise... about their most precious asset...their kids....

 

 

No answer please...just a rhetorical question......

 

 

and btw...you do tell the OP to go and have a good time and that her son will be fine...how do you know he will be fine? You should have suggested she ask her colleagues their opinion.

 

I don't understand your negativity. Did you even read her original post, or did you just not understand it? She didn't come here to ask for medical advice. She's a doctor, she doesn't need you or anyone else to tell her to seek medical advice from her colleagues, I'm sure she's competent enough to know what to do. Nor does she need a critique on who she should or shouldn't be leaving her children with, or an assumption that the grandparents will smoke around her asthmatic child.

 

What she came here for, appropriately enough, was reassurance about leaving her son and relaxing on a cruise. Her fear was something happening and not being able to be reached. Now she knows that there are emergency contact numbers for the ship, and that she can call home and for how much. The rest is up to her to decide.

[cruisenotbooze]

Alright everyone... this is way out of hand. Let’s let this thread die out. I now see the error of my ways. Should have simply said "need help with how to stay in contact with children at home while at sea." Geez... sure wish I had. I am very wordy, I realize. Probably because it was a very slow day today, and I had a little time to post and goof off. I would like to apologize to anyone who in any way felt offended, or who was offended by others who responded to my thread. I never should have included personal ‘feelings’ and personal 'worries' with you all. I will consider it a lesson learned. It seems that no matter what words I use, they will be judged on a level they were never meant to be judged on. And although others seem to feel that as long as you are behind a keyboard, you can insult others, I do not share those values and hope to never behave in such a way. Have a great night, God bless you all, happy sailings.

[cruisenotbooze]

and....

Thanks to all of you that gave helpful information. I do feel much better. part of the reason i was so worried is because i care for children with asthma every day, and i know how fast it can go bad. But i also know how to manage it with allergy meds, inhaled steroids, bronchodilators, ect... Its just that he is MY kid. And for those of you who can not understand this.... hes my kid. :(

[Crystalbast]

When I was growing up my Dad had to travel fairly often and at times his trip would coincide with my Mom having to go back home on some issue related to my grandparents. They would arrange for a lady to come in our home to look after us while they were away (and we all survived - even the time that I was jumping on my bed, fell off and cracked my head and had to go to the ER for stitches - totally my fault - :D). Our sitter was totally great and took great care of me.

 

If you don't have anybody in mind to stay with your kids I have one suggestion you might consider. If there is a college with a college with a nursing program where you live you might consider seeing if you could hire a student who is in the advanced stage of the program. Such a student would be more aware of potential issues with asthma.

[maggie cruises]

When I was growing up my Dad had to travel fairly often and at times his trip would coincide with my Mom having to go back home on some issue related to my grandparents. They would arrange for a lady to come in our home to look after us while they were away (and we all survived - even the time that I was jumping on my bed, fell off and cracked my head and had to go to the ER for stitches - totally my fault - :D). Our sitter was totally great and took great care of me.

 

If you don't have anybody in mind to stay with your kids I have one suggestion you might consider. If there is a college with a college with a nursing program where you live you might consider seeing if you could hire a student who is in the advanced stage of the program. Such a student would be more aware of potential issues with asthma.

 

I suggested this several posts ago..my post #27......but of course no one agreed with me because I was taking the stand that an asthmatic child should not be left with smokers.

 

We have since found out the Op is a doc that has treated pediatric asthma patients...which tells me that she really knows she should be concerned and our sugar coating the illness is just plain stupid....

 

I actually trust that the OP is justifiably concerned and refuse to say like some other posters that she should just go and have a good time and the child will be perfectly OK with smoking grandparents as the caregivers.

 

I still cannot fathom how many posters refuse to say that maybe the child's health comes first....

 

And I also can't fathom how many posters are telling a pediatic doc that she should leave and not worry...

 

If the OP did not say she was a doc...then maybe..just maybe...the posters could reassure her about her son's illness and suggest that she ask the child physician what they think she should do...

 

But when a doc...with experience as she says in treating pediatic asthma patients..comes on and says she has concerns contacting her son and leaving him with smoking grandparents...that takes the cake....so I suggested a medical type of babysitter just as you did....why? Because I do not believe in being PC and just saying...sure, the kid will be fine..go and enjoy yourself..you deserve couple time with your DH....or something to that effect....

 

I believe in addressing a serious concern....with a viable well thought out serious answer.....just as you do...

 

to say to the OP..go and everything with be OK.....is a totally unacceptable..inconsiderate answer to any parent...especially one who is a doctor

 

 

The most appropriate answer to this OP would have been to consult with her colleagues..plain and simple

[cruisenotbooze]

This is the last post because I am done giving attention to the posters on here who obviously are seeking it.

1. YES, I really am a Dr. I didn’t advertise that, someone outted me. Only reason she knew is because she spent several days on another post talking about how my posts make her sick (because I used an abbreviation she was unfamiliar with=NE1=anyone. what’s so hard about that?) so I did tell her I was not stupid and I was a Dr. dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb. So now, every post is going to be judged based on the fact that I am a strong intelligent woman, but my posts may not be 'perfect' enough.

2. No, I didn’t ask for medical advice at all. Go back and read. I was addressing my anxiety about leaving my children. Sorry it did not come out perfectly

3. I shouldn’t have to defend this but- Grandpa is 65 years old. Smokes OUTSIDE in his WORKSHOP a cigar every once in a while. So you were WRONG in your assumptions there as well. I was concerned because as a Dr., I understand that smoke is still carried on clothes, and is a major asthma trigger. But so are seasonal allergies. I plan to use preventative meds.

4. I am not RICH. And yes, price is always a concern for me. I donate to charities and volunteer my time as well. I didn't become a Dr. to get rich. That is a myth. I am a pediatrician. Any idea what a pediatrician makes in comparison to - lets say- a surgeon?

5. I get the felling that for some of you, cruising is your life. My life is supposed to be to serve God, and serve others as a reflection of his love. I don’t think I fit in here, and I don’t think I have done a great job of any of the above. I have let people (who I don’t even know!) get the better of me and make me angry, when I will never see any of you! It was never my goal to come here and be put down, treated like an idiot and insulted for no good reason. Yes, for some of you, cruising is your life. Not me, I have never even gone, and I have a feeling I won’t fit in on any ship either.

Cruising is not for me. Enjoy, and happy sailing.

[jetsfan]

These are the threads that really make me dislike CC. OP I am very sad that you had to post that last comment.

 

I hope your son will be fine. Our kids are our most precious gifts. When they are sick we hurt. When a child has a chronic condition it is scary as all get out. The truth is, as you know, we can't prevent all things from going badly, we can just anticipate and prevent the things we can.

 

The great thing is we live in a more connected world (for better or worse) and you can have more contact with home than 10 years ago, ie Skype, and what not. Whatever you decide, do not let others make you feel bad. If you do go on your trip have a great time and I wish your son good health.

[not-enough-cruising]

i cant sleep! my son (8yrs) got very ill this past week. he just got dx with asthma, and its been rough!!! after 8 days, his lungs are sounding a lot better today and i expect him to be in school on monday.

 

so... as a result, i am no longer seeing myself soaking up the sun and having a grand ole time with hubby, I am seeing my child sick and no one can get in touch with me, or they get in touch with me and theres nothing i can do, or the g-parents dont even realize how sick he is and dont even bother to try to get in touch with me. im really freaking out!!!

 

i dont know if i am going.

 

when i booked.. i did not really think about my two kids not being able to contact me. i feel like a bad mom. cant really take them because its a family (my DH's) reunion trip and NO ONE else will take the kids. i dont want to be the rude one. if its kids free they want, i will comply.

 

PARENTS: what has been your experience with leaving the kids behind, how did you handle this? were you as freaked out about being so far away as i am?

any tips on how to make this a little less stressful? please? lol

 

 

Sounds like you need/deserve the break. Go, enjoy, everything will be fine!!

[emmysmommy]

Cruisenotbooze: Sorry for the less than helpful responses here... As a mother of a son who had asthma as a child - I completely understand your anxiety. I hope you go enjoy your cruise and know that your son is in good hands. Just wanted to give you my good wishes and support. :)

[megs1954]

Bring your passport and not just a birth certificate in case you have to fly home from a foreign port. They aren't required to take most cruises but an excellent idea.

 

You can also have people at home text your phone with frequent updates. Turn your phone on once a day and see what's happening. The texts will drop in and you can return texts or calls as needed and desired. This is how we handle traveling in this type of instance. Turn email off if desired to save on the bill. Use wifi in foreign ports. Best wishes.

[Mrs. Wilburforce]

You're a great mom and you came here for advise about contacting your children's caretakers and I can't believe some of the posts I've just read. Anonymity does strange things to people.

I'm a retired healthcare professional and totally understand where you're coming from. You stop being the professional when you start having to deal with the illnesses of the people you hold dear. You don't lose your good judgement, it's just that the heart rules over the head.

Do whatever you think is right and take the good information that some posters kindly took the time to offer.

I hope you will give cruising another chance. You sound like a fun person and someone I'd like to meet on a ship.

My best wishes to you and your family,

Julieann

[kerrytens]

I am so sorry that the OP felt 'bullied' out of cc :mad: because that is exactly what seemed to have happened to her.

 

OP, I wish you and your family all the best.