Young Teens & Formal Dinner

[huskerdude]

I haven't been on these boards long since I never took a cruise, but we'll be going on one in April, so I have been reading here a lot lately and have found a ton of information. One thing I have found is, this topic is a very heated one! ;)

 

One of the main reasons we haven't taken a cruise yet is the formal dress code. My DH owns one suit (his funeral/wedding suit) and I don't own a dress (I hate wearing dresses. I do have very nice pants suits, though). Anyway, I have heard about these formal nights and how you must get dressed up, which turned us off of cruising. I have, since, found out that we have an option to the formal night and we don't have to get dressed up to eat, if we don't want to, so I booked our first cruise!

 

Now, just to be sure we're doing this right, I'm going to ask if this attire is acceptable and you can tell me yes or no.

 

DH is planning on taking his Dockers and button-down short sleeved shirts, jeans, polo shirts, shorts, tshirts, casual/dress shoes and sneakers.

 

I am planning on taking capris, blouses, nicer tops, shorts and tshirt, jeans, sandals and sneakers.

 

We are not eating in the main dining room on formal night, but plan to the other nights. What, from my list from above, can we wear in the dining room for each meal? And, if the casual buffet isn't open the last night, do they relax on the dress code that night, in the main dining room?

 

I, personally, could care less what someone is wearing to eat dinner, as long as they are neat and clean. My food doesn't taste any different if the person sitting next to me is wearing a tux or shorts and a shirt, and the food is what I go to a restaurant for.

 

We also are not "dress" up kind of people. But you really don't have to be. We went to both formal nights on our last cruise after skipping them the first time. It really is kind of nice to put on some things that you normally don't wear and enjoy the evening. We enjoyed it so much I would wear my suit almost all evening after dinner. But that does not mean he would have to wear a suit. The other nights dockers and a dress shirt for the men, would be fine. As far as the women, capris are often seen, open toed shoes are fine, but not flip flops. Now we did see a couple of nights (not Formal) that people were not dressed "right". One person was wearing baggy shorts and a tank top, he did have an excuse though, one of his bags of luggage was missing, we even got a letter under our door that night from Carnival asking if some one had an "extra" bag of luggage that was not theirs. The other time a lady was about 20 minutes late:eek: and was wearing her bathing suit with flips flops:eek: . No body made a scene about it but you could tell she was embaressed.

The only thing I would leave off the dinner clothes you mentioned is the shorts (for men) and sneakers.

All of this of course is just my opion.:D

And they really do serve the best meals on formal nights.:)

[huskerdude]

Frankly Scarlet I don't really care what you wear. If you wish to teach your children that rules and requests are subject to their own interpretation and when they feel like it they can simply ignore the rules (and laws for that matter) you go ahead. Then when the police show up some night because they decided that they would ignore some other rule or law, you can see if you can get them out of that responsibility also. I realize that the last thing taught in a class room these days is education in any form. So you just go ahead and do anything that tickles your pink. I have no plans to sail on any ship that you would ever consider using so it does not bother me.

 

Now we all know the problem with kids today, they don't dress right.

[sailinglisa]

It takes so little effort to meet the MINIMUM suggested dress for formal nights! I have been on Celebrity, Princess, RCCL, Carnival and a now defunct cruise line (Premier) - all it takes for women is a nice pair of black slacks and a sparkly top. For men AND BOYS all it takes is a pair of dress slacks, collared shirt and tie and a sport coat. What is so wrong with asking that people adhere to the MINIMUMS? Why do not parents encourage their children to at least adhere to the MINIMUM requirements? It is not like you are asking them to dress in a tux or a ball gown! When your kids get older, they will be asked to meet standards in dress and behavior that may be surprising to them if they are permitted to be lax when they are younger. Life is tougher than parents are.....maybe parents should be tougher than reality and prepare their kids for the future..................and that includes instilling that dress codes or requirements or suggestions are important (think job interviews, etc.) A cruise is a great way to start that process! And before you think I dress in formal gowns on formal night, I am of the nice black slacks and sparkly top contingent....at least I make an effort to meet the minimum standard! And in my life, I have been well served by doing that!

[CaribbeanKim]

*Wildly Applauding QueenTeacher*

 

 

*DITTO*

[momof4boys]

There must be something wrong with my boys (12, 16, 19, 22). They can't wait to wear their tuxes on the Elation in two weeks. When I suggested they just bring shirts and ties, they said, "No way", they want to be "stylin'!" LOL The funny thing is they are the fip-flop, shorts, t-shirt, backpacking, mountain climbing type of guys. They said this is their chance to try on something fun and new! :)

[big_duck]

There must be something wrong with my boys (12, 16, 19, 22). They can't wait to wear their tuxes on the Elation in two weeks. When I suggested they just bring shirts and ties, they said, "No way", they want to be "stylin'!" LOL The funny thing is they are the fip-flop, shorts, t-shirt, backpacking, mountain climbing type of guys. They said this is their chance to try on something fun and new! :)

 

They know what will happen when they head to the teen disco after dinner that's why. :D

[Keksie]

Once again the old Formal Nite question. As usual whats really being asked is, "Can I get away with ignoring the dress code?" Yes you can because Carnival is unlikely to be equally rude and enforce the rules. I guess they feel that if the person is going to be rude and ignore the completely understandable dress code, they will be even more rude if their social gaff is pointed out.

You don't have to dress up, just go to the Lido deck buffet.

Flame away, I wear a tux, if you don't dress up it just proves I'm right and you're WRONG.:eek:

 

Dan:D

 

What an incredible talent to be able to read minds. The OP actually reiterated that she was posting to get useful comments and answers to her question not the "what can I get away with" question.

 

I personally think it is a waste to purchase a suit or a jacket for a young teen who doesn't have a need for one other than one or two formal nights on a cruise. They grow so fast that by the time they need one again (we are talking about a young teen not some boy who will be looking for jobs etc.) they will have outgrown the clothes. I know you can get them on sale but it is still seems like a waste of time and money to me.

 

Lighten up people. This is a vacation it is for fun. Not a job interview, not meeting the parents, just a week or so of good times to relax with formal night being only a small percentage of your time onboard and except for the people you came with you will probably never see them again anyway.

 

FYI: I dress up and so does my boyfriend because it is fun to play dress up.

[SharonD]

Sharon, you and hubby can enjoy formal night. Let him wear his funeral/wedding suit. You can just wear a pair of black dress pants w/a sparkly top and black sandals and be just fine. Wear them for 2 hours and then go change. That's what we did - right back into shorts and shirts for the late shows, casino, karaoke and such. As for the teenagers - we made it a requirement that they eat dinner w/ us each night. That way we could catch up w/ them on what the day was like and what their evening plans were. We did give them a reprieve for the 2nd formal night and only the twin 15 yr old boys opted out. 16 yr old daughter and 10 yr old son still wanted to go to formal night and eat w/us.

 

But, he's not taking his suit and I'm not taking my pants suit. He will be taking Dockers and a couple dress shirts, no tie. I will be bringing capris and a couple dressy blouses.

 

I guess we will play it by ear. We have a late dinner seating. We can go scope out the dining room and see what people are wearing. If we won't be the only ones that are "under dresses", then we will go, if everyone is dressed up, then we won't.

[hdawson]

Sharon. Just FYI. Second seating seems to be the dressiest. Families with young children choose early seating so first seating may not be truely indicative of what you will find later.

[dan40]

Keksie,

The mind reading talent is a gift.....................called experience. Having read many Formal nite posts.

They already know they are going to violate the dress code, just want justification for doing so. [And like minded idiots give it to them.]

I REALLY don't care what any guy is wearing, thats not where I'm letching, errr looking.

I do care when our intelligence is insulted with claims of not understanding the rules. I think its outrageous so I post outrageous [but true] statements to let them know that at least one is not fooled by their silliness.

I have posted on this and the old board thousands of times. All but a small percentage of them as helpful as I could be.

But sometimes I cannot be tolerant of baloney.

Dan

[Keksie]

Keksie,

The mind reading talent is a gift.....................called experience. Having read many Formal nite posts.

They already know they are going to violate the dress code, just want justification for doing so. [And like minded idiots give it to them.]

I REALLY don't care what any guy is wearing, thats not where I'm letching, errr looking.

I do care when our intelligence is insulted with claims of not understanding the rules. I think its outrageous so I post outrageous [but true] statements to let them know that at least one is not fooled by their silliness.

I have posted on this and the old board thousands of times. All but a small percentage of them as helpful as I could be.

But sometimes I cannot be tolerant of baloney.

Dan

 

I prefer to give people the benefit of the doubt. If they really wanted to violate the dress code they just would without asking. I think most people just want a sense of what is actually worn instead of what is written. At least for RCI their written policy is not what is actually followed. They always list a smart casual night for 7 day cruises and the reality is there are 2 formal nights and 5 casual nights. The rules are not black and white. Formal to one person could mean a ball gown while formal to another can mean a beaded top and black pants. Women like to find out what others are wearing. I still think it would be a waste to buy a young teen boy a suit for just a couple of dinners. I suggest since you have such a low tolerence for these dress posts you just pass them on by and save yourself the grief.

[tumeroll]

Now we all know the problem with kids today, they don't dress right.

 

That is one of the problems. You know the saying sloppy dress = sloppy mind.

[tumeroll]

FYI: I dress up and so does my boyfriend because it is fun to play dress up.

 

Is it fun to play being an adult also?

[rosinryanz]

Here's how I see it:

 

If you don't like, or want to follow, the dress code on the cruise you booked, you should have booked with another line. I constantly remind people that NCL is completey casual with no required formal nights. If you prefer that casual style, then NCL is right for you. However, if you end up going on a cruise line with a strict dress code, please respect it. If you don't like the rule, then patronize another line. It is common courtesy, much like relegating your smoking to the smoking areas (another endlessly hot topic on these boards.)

 

In conclusion, please respect the dress codes, but don't make it the focus of your cruise. Have a blast and enjoy your vacation.

[Susky]

The OP actually reiterated that she was posting to get useful comments and answers to her question not the "what can I get away with" question.

 

Thanks for reiterating that. Part of the problem with this topic is that people are injecting their personal agendas into the discussion.

[sailinglisa]

For those of you who bemoan the cost of a suit or sports jacket for someone who will grow out of it soon.....have you ever heard of resale or second-hand shops? Or how about Ebay? One can get great outfits at very low cost!

[Keksie]

Is it fun to play being an adult also?

 

 

Very much fun!

[SharonD]

Sharon. Just FYI. Second seating seems to be the dressiest. Families with young children choose early seating so first seating may not be truely indicative of what you will find later.

 

 

 

Thanks for the info.

 

I guess we'll just wait and see when we get there. We'll probably end up just grabbing something from the buffet because we won't be dressing up.

[hdawson]

Sharon. Thank you for your consideration of those that desire and expect a formal setting. You have alot of class and your parents must have done a very good job. Enjoy your cruise and by all means, HAVE FUN!

[NoNoNanette]

Thanks for the info.

 

I guess we'll just wait and see when we get there. We'll probably end up just grabbing something from the buffet because we won't be dressing up.

 

Hi Sharon-

 

You had the right idea a few posts ago. You and your hubby might wish to grab a cocktail and "people-watch" during a prior dinner hour.

 

Trust me, honey. You'll be more than comfortable after you check out the others. ;)

 

Don't deprive yourself of a lovely dinner menu because others might not approve of your attire. Big deal!:rolleyes:

 

Have a blast!

[Garryjac]

Frankly Scarlet I don't really care what you wear. If you wish to teach your children that rules and requests are subject to their own interpretation and when they feel like it they can simply ignore the rules (and laws for that matter) you go ahead. Then when the police show up some night because they decided that they would ignore some other rule or law, you can see if you can get them out of that responsibility also. I realize that the last thing taught in a class room these days is education in any form. So you just go ahead and do anything that tickles your pink. I have no plans to sail on any ship that you would ever consider using so it does not bother me.

 

OK tumeroll, lets discuss a few things, shall we.

 

First, you appear to be a very foolish person who apparently is quite insecure. My childern are very well mannered and respectful and I have instilled in them the proper values needed to do well in life. What does this have to do with a cruise?

 

That being said, I would not force a child to put on a suit and tie if they were going to be uncomfortable while on vacation. In my opinon, there is a difference between a formal night on a cruise (VACATION) and going to a wedding, funeral or another formal event. I never said that I would not permit my son to wear a suit.

 

Second, adults should wear appropriate attire during the formal nights and it is nice to see our young people doing the same if they like. There would be nothing wrong if a young man (age 15 or younger for example) dressing in a pair of slacks, shirt and tie. I ask you again "Why would that bother you?????"

 

As for your statement about the police going to my home one night, I don't worry about that becase my childern have been taught respect for the law and proper rules regarding their behavior.

 

One last thing, I'm glad that you would never sail on the same cruise as me. Frankly, you would spoil the trip for everyone with your apparent dislike for people who like to have fun and enjoy themselves.

 

STOP BERATING THE USERS OF THIS SITE. Most want to use this site for what it was entended for, not your personal views about how terrible we all are. There are other places online to air your opinions and views, NOT HERE.

 

If you want to respond, please do so to me directly, my e-mail is listed in the directory.

 

My apologies to my fellow Cruise Critic users, this person just irks me.....

 

GM

[sotadragon]

My apologies to my fellow Cruise Critic users, this person just irks me.....

 

GM

That's okay, Garry, he irks most of us. :p