Kids/teens at formal night?

[Keishaw]

I guess I should have expected there would be a range of strong opinions on this topic! I can certainly see both sides of this one.

 

Our boys are already very polite, well-behaved and respectful (at least many people have told us so - it's not that way at home always:) lol)

... so I don't really see it as a missed opportunity to learn some social graces. But practice makes perfect!

 

I think we will sit down and have a real heart-to-heart talk over this, but I'll still let them decide. They lost their much-loved Grandmother this year, so thinking about it in the context of special time with their widowed Grandfather will probably put it into a different perspective for them. And the photo-ops I'm thinking of are with me as the photographer, not the on-site photo-snappers that I've heard about.

 

The more I think about it, the more I'm realizing that we will probably all be so flat-out all day, everyday, and not always together, that the dinner hour will be our sacred time to get together and discuss the day's events.

 

I'm pretty confident that they'll make the right choice for the family, whatever that may be.

 

Plus, it's nice to hear that just a shirt and tie would be adequate, IF that is what they would prefer. That's not too much to ask, and well within the budget. But if they want to rent those tuxes, we'll do that too.

 

Thanks again for the input everyone!

 

Karen

[Schplinky]

I agree 100%. As always, on these boards, we can agree to disagree.

 

Beth,

 

The green font is hard on these 39 year-old eyes. Please consider another color

[jazzmanfive]

Hmmm c'mon caviargal no one suggested that the kids enter the dining room not properly attired!

I apologise if anyone took offence to the "monkey suit" comment,just looking at it from a young mans perspective.I am that father and i like to dress up in my good togs too,but i do it for me and not for others.

Personally i love formal night,not for the "pomp" but for the glamour (not sure if that is quite the right word but--) the outfits are truly amazing. A cruise really seems to bring out people's creativity,ranging from the spectacular to the downright ridiculous,i just love it.:D

To everyone who has a cruise imminent have fun,enjoy and make some memories.

Jazz from London.:cool:

[FJTinSC]

Just my 2 cents worth here!

 

If your boys are planning on comming to the main dining room on formal nights then you should require them to dress appropriately. On the other hand, if you choose to allow them to eat elsewhere, then that is fine too.

 

I agree about allowing a certain amount of freedom, but, at the same time, I follow the established protocols, and do not respect those who do not.

[QuitMyDayJob]

When my son was still believing in Santa Claus, we told him that if he wore the dress up clothes (that he HATED) maybe Santa would think he didn't have any cool clothes and there would be some under the tree.

 

:o

[QuitMyDayJob]

Double post--sorry.

[Man314]

I disagree with that philosophy, Jazzmanfive. I think there are certain social graces that kids need to learn and social settings that they need to experience. Always having their own way and never having any expectations to live up to leads, in part, to the poor behavior we all hear about. If the kids are allowed to do pretty much as they please during the day, I see no reason that they cannot be expected to attend dinner with the family and dress appropriately. There are certain things I expect of my kids, like attending church, giving a firm handshake when they meet someone, dressing in smart casual on Thanksgiving and Christmas (even if it's just the immediate family there), not wearing grungy clothes of any sort on cruises, and eating in the dining room with DH and myself every night, dressed appropriately.

 

Right on beth4652!! Our expectation are that our children (14 & 16 girls)dine with us and on formal nights they dress up. They absolutely loved it! Just be careful if you send you teenage girls to the spa for a formal hair styling . . . both girls went with their Seapass card and came back with beautiful hair and a $120 styling charge! It was worth it though as they looked stunning!!:D

[smrtypnts]

Thanks for the feedback.

 

I guess it was our thought as much as the boys' ... partly because of the added expense of the clothing & shoes. They are both growing so much right now that buying them something formal would be quite a waste.

 

Does anyone know if the tux rental for their age would be the same price as the adult rental, which I believe is $85 each for the week? I'm not sure how the fitting works - they might actually fit into small men's tuxes, but perhaps there is a junior size?

 

If I was splurging for a tux rental for them, I would insist they go to both formal nights for sure!

 

This is a once-in-a-lifetime trip with their grandfather, so maybe the photo-ops at the formal dinners would be well worth the extra $$$!

 

Karen

 

My son is 11 and takes a size 12 boys. i bought him a brand new tux on ebay for $40!!! I was very pleased, it fits him perfect and I'm hoping to sell it for $20 or $25 upon our return. 12/11 cruise seems to me like you have the time, you may want to choose to look at ebay. If your 12yo would fit into a size 12, I'd be happy to sell you my son's, upon our return on 11/26. That would put you in the position of only buying one outfit. Email me at smrtypnts at hotmail dot com, if you're interested.

Ronni

[smrtypnts]

Thanks for the feedback.

 

I guess it was our thought as much as the boys' ... partly because of the added expense of the clothing & shoes. They are both growing so much right now that buying them something formal would be quite a waste.

 

Does anyone know if the tux rental for their age would be the same price as the adult rental, which I believe is $85 each for the week? I'm not sure how the fitting works - they might actually fit into small men's tuxes, but perhaps there is a junior size?

 

If I was splurging for a tux rental for them, I would insist they go to both formal nights for sure!

 

This is a once-in-a-lifetime trip with their grandfather, so maybe the photo-ops at the formal dinners would be well worth the extra $$$!

 

Karen

 

My son is 11 and takes a size 12 boys. i bought him a brand new tux on ebay for $40!!! I was very pleased, it fits him perfect and I'm hoping to sell it for $20 or $25 upon our return. 12/11 cruise seems to me like you have the time, you may want to choose to look at ebay. If your 12yo would fit into a size 12, I'd be happy to sell you my son's, upon our return on 11/26. That would put you in the position of only buying one outfit. Email me at smrtypnts at hotmail dot com, if you're interested.

Ronni

[Ohunion Cruzers]

$200 for Plane Ride

$600 for Caribbean Cruise

$300 for Shore Excursions

$0 - to look like a slob on formal night

PRICELESS.

 

I like it ! ! !

 

The following expectation can be found on RCI’s Web Page:

 

http://www.royalcaribbean.com/customersupport/faq/lifeOnboardFaq.do;jsessionid=00003r7uyfPObwi9-KWfJ3UFI4U:v2mocc7o#8

 

What are the dress codes onboard?

There are three distinct types of evenings onboard: casual, smart casual and formal. Suggested guidelines for these nights are:

 

Casual: Sport shirts and slacks for men, sundresses or pants for women

Smart Casual: Jackets and ties for men, dresses or pantsuits for women

Formal: Suits and ties or tuxedos for men, cocktail dresses for women

 

3 to 4-night cruises include one formal night and the remainder are casual nights.

5 – night cruises include one formal and the remainder casual nights.

6 – night cruises include two formal nights, one smart casual and the remainder are casual nights .

7 to 9-night cruises include two formal nights, one smart casual night and the remainder nights are casual nights.

10 to13-night cruises include two formal nights and two smart casual nights, and the remainder are casual nights.

14+ -night cruises include three formal nights and four smart casual nights and the remainder are casual nights.

 

We appreciate your usual parental guidance and cooperation in observing these easy guidelines with your children.

[Keishaw]

Thanks Ronni,

 

My 12 year old is into a size 16 at least. He's 5'4" and 120 lbs. And as I mentioned, still growing like a weed. I think I'll go to our local consignment stores and see what I can find in the smaller men's suit/jacket area. He's the type of guy who really needs to try it on and see if it fits! And if they do want a tux, I think I'll rent. It sounds like it will beat the hassle of shopping/packing/lugging around (we are adding WDW for a week after our cruise). But thanks for the offer! Have a good cruise.

 

And as far as the dresscode, I certainly wouldn't be taking them in to the dining room on the formal or smart casual nights unless they were suitably dressed. If they choose not to dress accordingly, they'll go elsewhere!

 

Karen

[Merion_Mom]

Beth,

 

The green font is hard on these 39 year-old eyes. Please consider another color

Lee, agreed. But if you "highlight" the green with your cursor, it becomes a very manageable shade. :)

[Merion_Mom]

I would also add: If you asked my son if he wanted to wear his tux (Yes, I bought one - he has already worn it half a dozen times, between cruises and proms), he would say NO.

 

Once he has it on, and the admiring glances and comments come his way, he forgets all about that "no" and is VERY happy to be in his tux! (which is why, in my profound maternal wisdom, I do NOT ask him what he "wants to do". Is he intelligent? Yes. Is he wise and mature? Not yet. :D)

 

Such is the nature of the (teenaged) beast.

 

Carol

[hdcobur]

We have one steadfast rule about cruising (ok - a few more), but near and dear to my heart - is that we will eat dinner together everynight in the dining room - formal or casual. Please do not miss out on this wonderful opportunity with your kids - they may grumble, but I will tell you that they make for some of the best memories. We still talk about our dinners in the dining room and it has always been absolutely great family time. You will be so proud of your kids all dressed up and to be honest - grown up. At least make sure that you go to at least one of the formal night as a family - even if you don't rent/buy tuxes - Even in a suit/or nice dress shirt with a tie - all of the teenage girls will be swooning.

 

Of course if my DH reads this, it will be the moment that he complains about all of the formal gowns in the closet and no room for anything else. Is it wrong that I can't part with them and my kids have outgrown them??:D

 

Most importantly, do what is best for your family. For our family, this is special/quality family time, that we work entirely too hard to pass up.

[Calicruisefamily]

I must say I'm glad I have a girl LOL:D Mine is 8 going on 16:) This is going to be her first cruise and we have gone out and bought her 2 outfits for formal night and she is realy looking forward to formal night. Sure it cost alot to get them all dolled up but the way they look and feel is priceless.;)

 

 

 

 

Voyager of the Seas 11/26/05 Wooooo Hooooo

[smrtypnts]

Thanks Ronni,

 

My 12 year old is into a size 16 at least. He's 5'4" and 120 lbs. And as I mentioned, still growing like a weed. I think I'll go to our local consignment stores and see what I can find in the smaller men's suit/jacket area. He's the type of guy who really needs to try it on and see if it fits! And if they do want a tux, I think I'll rent. It sounds like it will beat the hassle of shopping/packing/lugging around (we are adding WDW for a week after our cruise). But thanks for the offer! Have a good cruise.

 

And as far as the dresscode, I certainly wouldn't be taking them in to the dining room on the formal or smart casual nights unless they were suitably dressed. If they choose not to dress accordingly, they'll go elsewhere!

 

Karen

 

5'4" HOLY MACKERAL!! I can't imagine my kid sprouting to that size in a year! He's not even 5ft. He plays basketball and while he's not the tallest on his team, he's certainly the average. I wish he was 5'4", he'd be the envy of the team!!!

 

Good luck in your decisions. :)

[Keishaw]

Would you believe my son is only slightly taller than average in his grade, and he just turned 12 a few weeks ago. I coach the grade 7 boys volleyball team (as a parent volunteer), and there are at least 5 that are taller than him out of 15. And we were all quite delighted last week when a new 12-year-old boy came to our school and showed up for volleyball practice ... he's 5'10" or 5'11". I guess we grow 'em big up here in Canada (coincidentally, the NBA's Steve Nash went to our small school!).

 

The boys have decided that they would like to join us for all dinners, including formal, but that they don't want the tuxes. Fine. As soon as they catch any swooning looks coming their way (Thanks hdcobur, hadn't really thought of that angle!), they will be quite happy and content. Well, the 15-year-old will, anyway.

 

Looks like we're going shopping this weekend! Woohoo! Clothes shopping with impatient boys!:eek: Maybe I should take them separately... lol

 

Karen

[tupper]

I have one girl and 2 boys...My 2 boys haven't protested too much, so far about the dressing up, but I know they would rather wear something more comfortable, IF they were given the choice to dress another way.

Actually I did give them a choice:

A-dress formally and come to formal dinner with us

B-Go eat dinner with the other kids in the kid's program on those nights

 

The result: All 3 will be joining us! My boys are at the age where they want to try the lobster and the things that the rest of us wait the whole week for. Basically, I told them, "the best menu is on formal nights, but it's up to you..." They can always change after dinner, if they want.

 

I totally and personally understand the cost issue here...I mulled it over it myself. BUT I did get lucky and found brand new boy's dress jackets for $20 and matching dress pants for $8, just last week at Macy's (boys 8-20 dept). I just need to work on the shoe thing now!

 

If you live near a Macy's, it might be worth checking out!

[Keishaw]

There's not a single Macy's in Canada that I know of. But thanks for the tip!

And I didn't know about the lobster ... they both LOVE it. There's another incentive I hadn't thought of.:)

Karen

[steve20832]

We are planning to attend the formal night dinners WITHOUT our 12 and 15 year old sons. Is this fairly common? This is our first cruise, and we're just wondering if this is what parents tend to do. They're just not into the dress-up/formal thing at all.

Karen

 

If your kids don't want to dress up then don't bring them to the dining room for dinner on the formal night. I think it is very rude to show up on formal night in anything less than a slacks, sport jacket and tie. I bet they won't go to a wedding or high school prom in shorts and a t-shirt so you shouldn't show up on formal night wearing the same thing.

[stargate fan]

Our two sons are going on their third cruise in February. There was never a discussion about dinners, it was just expected that they would join us as they do at home.

That said, my opinion is that we all have to do things that we may not like. I bet their grandfather would enjoy having them at dinner so much. Sometimes it's not just about us...we have to think of others. Life is too short and if they can make their grandfather happy on a cruise, then that's what they should do.

The idea of e-bay is excellent. Also check out thrift stores. I know someone who buys all famous label clothes at her nearest Salvation Army store. People gain and lose weight and get rid of perfect clothing.

Memories are wonderful things. Regret can haunt a person for a lifetime. Making a grandfather happy at dinner is so worth it. I bet the boys will never forget those formal nights as long as they live. Make sure you have a camera and take many, many pictures. They will be treasured some day.

Best wishes.

 

I guess I should have expected there would be a range of strong opinions on this topic! I can certainly see both sides of this one.

 

Our boys are already very polite, well-behaved and respectful (at least many people have told us so - it's not that way at home always:) lol)

... so I don't really see it as a missed opportunity to learn some social graces. But practice makes perfect!

 

I think we will sit down and have a real heart-to-heart talk over this, but I'll still let them decide. They lost their much-loved Grandmother this year, so thinking about it in the context of special time with their widowed Grandfather will probably put it into a different perspective for them. And the photo-ops I'm thinking of are with me as the photographer, not the on-site photo-snappers that I've heard about.

 

The more I think about it, the more I'm realizing that we will probably all be so flat-out all day, everyday, and not always together, that the dinner hour will be our sacred time to get together and discuss the day's events.

 

I'm pretty confident that they'll make the right choice for the family, whatever that may be.

 

Plus, it's nice to hear that just a shirt and tie would be adequate, IF that is what they would prefer. That's not too much to ask, and well within the budget. But if they want to rent those tuxes, we'll do that too.

 

Thanks again for the input everyone!

 

Karen

[larkwind]

Just a quick FYI--the other thing boys who grow fast early do is SLEEP! Don't be afraid to let him have all of Saturday morning if he needs it. Imagine 4'8" to 6'1" in a couple of years. Fall of 6th grade I bought his choir shoes in Sept and had to buy another pair 2 sizes bigger in Nov! But he sure liked having people ask him what he was planning to study in college--when he was just trying to pass 8th grade:rolleyes: and he still has the coaches drooling when he lifts weights in gym class (but choir wins!)

Just don't expect him to act as old as he looks!