Assistance for Disabled/Elderly Parents

[#1Daughter]

First let me say, Wow! What a great site! My question ... My Mom and Dad would like desperately to go on a Hawaiian cruise (10+ days) in the Spring/Summer. My mom is confined to a wheelchair, but does have some mobility using a walker. Because my Dad is not very heathly himself, he is completely afraid to go on vacation just he and Mom. He will not be able to help Mom 100% (pushing the chair, moving luggage, etc.). I suggested a scooter, but my mom has trouble using them. They have even offered to pay for myself, husband and 2 young children to go with them. Unfortunately that impossible for us. Does anyone have any suggestions? Are there groups/companies that offer this kind of assistance? I know my dad would be willing to pay costs. Any help would be GREATLY appreciated! Thanks!

[cjh]

My Princess experience has been we pull up drop off the luggage with the porter then someone comes over and takes us to the side because of my daughters in wheelchairs. Once we have our S&S cards someone takes us to the elevator and on to the ship. The luggage arrives about 1 hour after we get on outside our cabin doors.

 

At ports a cruise staff always pushes my kids off and on the ship and in the buffet someone is always there to carry their plates.

 

Basically cruising is very accessible. However, you need to book early because there are very few accessible cabins and they go quick (not always by those that need them)

[Arwenmark]

While you would get help boarding and disembarking they don't have anyone that will help out full time. what is the problem your mom has with a scooter? perhaps all she needs is more practice.

I am sure you could find someone willing to go along to help but it would have to be someone you trust.

if you do rent a scooter be sure you also reserve an HC cabin or it won't fit in.

[IrisF]

Hi #1Daughter,

It may be possible to hire an LPN or similar type person to help your parents to enjoy a cruise. There may be agencies in your town that would be able to help you with locating a reliable person. If your parents paid for their trip (perhaps in an adjoining cabin) they may all benefit from an arrangement like this. It may not cost as much as paying to have your whole family cruise with them.

 

Many of the HC cabins have adjoining regular rooms. If your Mother needs a wheel-in bathroom that would be a necessity, as other cabins have a small step up into the bathrooms.

 

By the way, small travel scooters do fit into the standard cabins on most ships. The standard doors are 22 to 23 inches wide and my scooter is 18.5 inches wide. You do need a bit of experience driving them to get comfortable when using them in small places such as the hallway into the cabin itself. Maybe she could rent one of the smaller sizes to try out at home? The scooters they have at Wal-Mart, Target and in the grocery stores are much to big and cumbersome for some people to start out with. They are also not very responsive. One that is designed to be used at home is much smaller and easier to use.

 

If I can be of any other help, please let me know.

IrisF

[montgomeryfamily]

Your parents definitely need to have a handicapped room with your mother primarily using the wheelchair and having limited mobility with the walker. This will enable her to enjoy the room and not need much assistance with the bathroom or getting around in the stateroom.

 

When making the dining reservations, have the TA request a table near the front of the dining room that will accommodate a wheelchair. Then when they get onboard, physically check out the table location to see if it will work--there are no steps or other obstacles. This will allow a table change before the dining that evening.

 

I agree that porters can help with luggage and the wheelchair both at the airport and at the port--both embarkation and disembarkation. But there will be more limited assistance onboard. So if your mother cannot use a scooter, then she will need to use the wheelchair because the distances are so far to walk for someone with limited mobility. She would probably be exhausted trying to get around on the walker. If your Dad can't push her and she really isn't physically able to push herself, then she does need to bring assistance with her.

 

The entertainment venues should have a wheelchair assessible viewing area--I know that Princess, RCI, and Royal Caribbean do. It is also possible to request special assistance here as well. Shore excursions may be more difficult--it is important to try to verify accessibility well before getting on the ship, as often the shipboard excursions folks really have no clue. In addition, usually the shore excursion vendor provides limited assistance--certainly no one to push the wheelchair.

 

Do they already have a ship/sailing booked? Do they know what dates during which they are looking to sail?

 

I have a couple of suggestions if you would like to email me at kacruiser@ev1.net.

[Splinter]

The Island Princess does this trip (15 days round trip from LA), and has a few cabins that are wheelchair accessible and sleep 3. The third bed is a bunk though, so you would need someone who is game to sleep "up the ladder". They book up far in advance though....it may be too late to book for the spring. Keep in mind that there are few if any round-trip mainland to Hawaii trips after early May, as many of these ships (Princess, Celebrity, RCCL) go to Alaska for the summer. I think only NCL has summer Hawaii cruises, and they would have to fly both ways for this islands only trip.

 

Is there another family member (grand-child, niece, etc.) who might go with them for the costs of a free cruise? It would be much cheaper than trying to hire a nurse and it does not sound like your mother needs one (LVNs in California working private duty get at least $200/day). Anyone can be hired to push a wheelchair if you have other no family, and you can often pay much less if you are throwing in a free cruise. It would be important to also pay for their shore excursions if they would be helping your mother with these as well.

[#1Daughter]

Thank you so much for your suggestions! I didn't even realize there were smaller scooters ~ my mother may not know this either! I will definitely check that out. My folks have been on many cruises in the past. My mother has Rheumatoid arthritis and has had several surgeries (knuckle replacement, knee replacement, etc.). Almost 2 years ago she had back surgery for stenosis and then 6 ~more~ back surgeries for fractures. She's definitely had a long haul ~ and still has a very long way to go. Sadly, I think she's worse now than she was in 2004. Last May my family (myself and my husband and 2 sons & my brother and parents) all went to Disney World ~ Great vacation ~ but, extremely difficult on Mom.

 

They do not have a trip booked yet. My mom is SO ready to go, but it's my dad that has doubts. He pretty much has decided he won't go without someone else to help. ~ I don't blame him! The funny thing is they want to go on a longer cruise (10-15 or even more! days) They've mentioned England as their first choice (I think the flight may be too long for mom), but have been to Hawaii and would like to go back.

 

They have mentioned their trip to one of the nurses at mom's rheumatologists office ~ I believe she's thinking about going (her kids are grown) if her husband doesn't mind!

 

I feel just awful about not being able to go with them. Too many factors ~ kids are in school, 2 weeks vacation wouldn't be possible for myself or my husband, etc. Guess it's that "daughter guilt" I put on myself!

 

OK, I believe I am rambling now! Thanks again for your help! I'll keep you all posted! :rolleyes:

[kimprior]

Hi, I don't know where you live but I'm from PA. I just found out about attendant care, it is a state program designed to keep disabled people out of hospitals. NO COST or VERY LOW COst. They have someone come into my home 25 hours a week to help out. They will also pay for the person to accompany me on vacation. I would have to pay their fare, but the salary if paid for.

 

I am very nervous about my upcoming cruise in Feb. It is in celebration of my 40 th birthday. We are taking the Grand out of Galveston. It will be myself, my husband and our three daughters. I don't know how we will manage with me being in a wheelchair. We only have a manual one. I need him to push as I don't have strenth in my arms to use it. Oh it will certainly be an adventure. My youngest is 3 and very active! We were not able to an handipped stateroom so we will be in a standard mini suite, with an inside across the hall. I don't need the wheelchair for short distances.

 

Good Luck

Kim