My husband keeps trying to get me to cancel...

[suzy671]

Don't cancel. You will have a fantastic time, life is too short to not enjoy it.

[Mysticks1]

[quote name='KAWS']

Another poster also said that maybe you should not talk about it so much for a while. I think that's a good idea and that's also what hubby told me. He told me to please save SOME surprises for the actual vacation. I've been on these boards gathering up so much information and having such a blast doing it. Then I try to tell him all about it and get all frustrated when he doesn't share my same level of joy and anticipation.

Kim[/quote]

[B][COLOR=purple]I was the one reluctant about cruising to begin with. Hubby wanted to go. I got excited when I found these boards and learned all about it. I really like to plan things and know exactly what to expect with everything that I do. I also got really excited , learning about the ship and making my packing list. He thought I was crazy when I would tell him daily what I learned. (My tips got us on the ship first!)[/COLOR][/B]
[B][COLOR=purple][/COLOR][/B]
[B][COLOR=purple]We have been planning a family cruise(11 total - all his family)and I haven't been mentioning everything this time. He asked me recently when I was going to start getting all that information on this cruise so we could book excursions. He has been looking too somewhere because he mentioned the "secret door". [/COLOR][/B]
[B][COLOR=purple][/COLOR][/B]
[B][COLOR=purple]I think it would be good to back off a little on the information unless it is booking excursions or something that needs his input. Just stay on the boards here where others are also excited and can be excited for you. BTW my 17th anniversary is the 17th. You will be fine. Good Luck! [/COLOR][/B]

[L2J]

[quote name='Anatresia']He is ready for kids, because he suggested we cancel the cruise to start trying early for a baby...

[/quote]

Tell him the two of you can get jiggy on the balcony thrice daily :D

[Loves_Dogs]

Your post gave me flashbacks of my own marriage. I was married to the worlds biggest 'cheapskate' for 18 years...and having been happily divorced for 5 years now, I enjoy my vacations. No more begging or trying to convince someone to go while they try and rain all over my parade.

Actually I just wanted to tell you that your doggies are adorable!

[Anatresia]

[quote name='BlueJacketsFan1'][FONT=Comic Sans MS][COLOR=blue]Quit complaining, you knew what he was like before you got married. I'm sure he is no different now than he was before. If you are bitching about things he is doing now. Yes, you should definitely have kids right away. That will make everything better. Give your future kids a brake and get your lifes worked out before you even think about kids. You have the money so go get help from a professional, not the internet. [/COLOR][/FONT][/QUOTE]

Did you even read my post? I wanted REASONS he'd enjoy cruising, to strengthen my argument, not marital advice. I personally disagree with the marital advice given, though I don't think it was given to be cruel. We are FINE. He is cheap about vacations. We agree on the important things and I'm more worried about people like yourself breeding, who find fun in flaming others on the internet, than my husband and myself.

Your post was unnecessarily mean spirited and you missed the point. Seething words from a genius. How sound is YOUR life?

[Anatresia]

Thanks again, those of you who understand. I have received some good advice (regarding methods of selling the cruise idea, which is what I wanted.)

I appreciate the ideas. I'm taking over the cruise planning 100% and he can treat it as a "free" vacation. I will try to refrain from talking about it.

I know he will like it when we get there. I am 100% convinced- his natural reaction to most new things is trepidation, but he is the type that can let go and have fun once he gets there. :D

The suggestions regarding baby-making and the F deck will no doubt entice him a bit. :)

I can't change the week, because I'm a teacher and that's the week we have off this year. He can deal with crowds at the airport. He can bring one of his hundred books he's never cracked open. :D

[Bramcruiser]

I don't think you can get your husband to shut up but I am sure he will thank you for a lovely time when you get back. Oh there are lots of practical - aka unimaginative wallet watching - spouses out there. Probably not a bad thing as it puts curbs on those who are on the excessive side. However, sometimes people look at the dollars and not the value you get from the enjoyment and relaxation from a cruise. Sometimes spending money on something that seems nothing more than a big waste of funds turns out to be a wise investment. I have come to the conclusion my annual cruises are my saviour of my sanity as I work hard most of the year and hanging around the house for a week is just not going to cut it as you never really leave your problems at work and home behind.

I think you have the right attitude so just move on. Maybe you can use the age old comments that parents give to their kids like "Because........." or "Just do as I tell you!". LOL! I think you're only going to win when you finally go!

[iluvdoxies]

Love your doxies ! How many do you have ? We have 2.

My husband wasnt sure if he'd like our first cruise in 2003---23 cruises later- I'd say he;s hooked.

What ship are you going on ?

[L2J]

[quote name='Anatresia']The suggestions regarding baby-making and the F deck will no doubt entice him a bit. :)

[/quote]

A Wicked Weasel and something naughty from V.S. wouldn't hurt either ;)

[Anatresia]

[quote name='iluvdoxies']Love your doxies ! How many do you have ? We have 2.

My husband wasnt sure if he'd like our first cruise in 2003---23 cruises later- I'd say he;s hooked.

What ship are you going on ?[/QUOTE]

we have two red smoothies- a boy and a girl. there's a really great board like this for dachshunds- if you'd like it, you can email me and I'll send you the link! [email]eponinerose@yahoo.com[/email]

We're going on the Victory in April.

[BlueJacketsFan1]

[FONT=Comic Sans MS][COLOR=blue]Maybe you don't need counseling, but look how you word things. You are looking for advise to strengthen your argument. Arguments, over whether or not to do a cruise. Doesn't that sound a little ridiculous. Right along with asking people to help you win a argument over the internet. There are plenty of people out there writing reviews for you to read and research your cruise and find things that might be of interest to him or better yet the two of you. That sounds like a much better way to go about what you are trying to do. Good Luck[/COLOR][/FONT]

[TennisLover]

I just want to comment on your husband's issue with traveling on Easter weekend (since you have seemed to calm him down on the finance issue). From your posts, he is stressed about traveling on a busy weekend (not that he is cruising on a holiday -- can't tell if it's your holiday or not, but that doesn't seem to be the issue).

We travel with our kids and have to take our cruises during school breaks -- so it is very, very busy. The NY-Florida route during President's Week, Christmas Week and Easter week is insane. You are doing the right thing by flying in a day early. That should alleviate the stress of holiday travel -- you (and your luggage) have plenty of time to make it to the ship on time.

In addition, if finances allow, you might want to consider spending a few extra dollars on a nicer hotel the night before your cruise (not just an airport hotel or the cheapest place you can find). This way, you can have a nice quiet night, decompressing from the travel (especially if it is stressful) and be ready for all that the cruise has to offer.

We started doing this and it has been great for my family. My husband and I work full time and juggle the kids schedules (HS and MS). Our lives are crazy. We have mostly cruised from Florida and love getting there a couple of days early, just to decompress and relax. (We also go on the cruise usually with a lot of extended family, so this is really quiet time for us.)

We have had some travel issues, but they can happen anytime. By getting in a day early and relaxing somewhere nice, they are long forgotten by the time we step on the ship.

Have a great time on your cruise. I am sure that your husband will be hooked once he tries it. I would definitely get more tips from the guy who posted and said he was just like your husband. He sounds like a good resource for you.

[Anatresia]

[quote name='BlueJacketsFan1'][FONT=Comic Sans MS][COLOR=blue]Maybe you don't need counseling, but look how you word things. You are looking for advise to strengthen your argument. Arguments, over whether or not to do a cruise. Doesn't that sound a little ridiculous. Right along with asking people to help you win a argument over the internet. There are plenty of people out there writing reviews for you to read and research your cruise and find things that might be of interest to him or better yet the two of you. That sounds like a much better way to go about what you are trying to do. Good Luck[/COLOR][/FONT][/QUOTE]

Argument, in the sense of a good debate, not a screaming match, is how I meant it. My husband and I are good at talking through things, we just have to bring the right mental ammunition to the table, which is what I came on here seeking.

Sometimes people who have experienced a similar situation can offer insights into the situation as well. Not advice, just a little, "Hey, I've been there and here's what happened..." So I could show my husband that post that said, "I didn't want to go, wife dragged me, and i loved it" and it's stronger than me just saying to him, "You'll love it" without experience backing me up.

[K.T.B.]

[quote name='Anatresia']Did you even read my post? I wanted REASONS he'd enjoy cruising, to strengthen my argument, not marital advice. I personally disagree with the marital advice given, though I don't think it was given to be cruel. We are FINE. He is cheap about vacations. We agree on the important things and I'm more worried about people like yourself breeding, who find fun in flaming others on the internet, than my husband and myself.

Your post was unnecessarily mean spirited and you missed the point. Seething words from a genius. How sound is YOUR life?[/quote]Brava! Everyone offering marital advice and not cruise advice needs to read that post. :)

As for helping to get your husband more excited, start showing him the excursions. Tell him about the round-the-clock food. Tell him about the F-deck. ;)

By the way, for my first cruise, my wife was very concerned about the cost and the possibility of her getting seasick. She just was not excited about going. But, considering the job she had at the time, I told her she needs to get away and relax. Period. And while she did still complain slightly, she knew I was going to take her no matter what. Now 4 cruises later, we're hooked. :D

[TBR]

If his real objection is the date,then why not move it to May when no spring break or easter traffic will be the problem? I don't think forcing someone to go on a vacation is the best way to start a cruise vacation.
What if he hates it,you are going to have one loooooong week.

See if your TA will lend you a video or DVD on cruising,he may be excited about the whole idea,maybe just the time frame.

[Anatresia]

The problem with the date is I'm a teacher and can't get a week off any other time in the year, other than summer and we just don't want to go in summer (heat, hurricanes). we're from Buffalo, so getting away to someplace warm in April will be nice, too.

I'm not worried about him getting there and hating it. I know him too well- he will love it. The relaxation, the food... he can't NOT love it.

[nealsbabe]

[quote name='Anatresia']Thanks again, those of you who understand. I have received some good advice (regarding methods of selling the cruise idea, which is what I wanted.)

I appreciate the ideas. I'm taking over the cruise planning 100% and he can treat it as a "free" vacation. I will try to refrain from talking about it.

I know he will like it when we get there. I am 100% convinced- his natural reaction to most new things is trepidation, but he is the type that can let go and have fun once he gets there. :D

The suggestions regarding baby-making and the F deck will no doubt entice him a bit. :)

I can't change the week, because I'm a teacher and that's the week we have off this year. He can deal with crowds at the airport. He can bring one of his hundred books he's never cracked open. :D[/quote]



No one should judge until they walk a mile in someone else's shoes. Try to relax and ask him to come up with some ideas on the cruise so he feels like he is contributing to his own vacation. You sound very level headed and am sure things will work out. What seems like a big deal today will be tomorrow's old news. Good luck!

[nealstuber]

[quote name='Anatresia']Did you even read my post? I wanted REASONS he'd enjoy cruising, to strengthen my argument, not marital advice. I personally disagree with the marital advice given, though I don't think it was given to be cruel. We are FINE. He is cheap about vacations. We agree on the important things and I'm more worried about people like yourself breeding, who find fun in flaming others on the internet, than my husband and myself.

Your post was unnecessarily mean spirited and you missed the point. Seething words from a genius. How sound is YOUR life?[/QUOTE]


Folks, she asked for adivice how to get someone psyched for a cruise..

100 days out - Model your first formal night dress for him

90 days out -Make "umbrella drinks" and listen to carribean music (we like the Countdown Singers)

80 days out - Model your new swim suit

70 days out - Have a lobster night

60 days out - Good time for formal dress #2

50 days out - Get the cruise lines DVD (usually free) and watch it

40 days out - Book a couples massage locally

30 days out - Change the screen saver and background on your computer to topical themes.

20 days out - put grass skirts on your puppies

10 days out - plan your outfits for each night.

1 day after your cruise -Tell him how much you spent getting him pumped up for the cruise and inform him that if he wants to save that money next time, just shut up and go with it!

You two are gonna be just fine - don't let anyone tell you different!

[alphakitty]

[quote name='jerseygirl3']I can't say I've ever been in that situation...my husband counts on me to plan a vacation at least once every four months (we just finished with our fourth, and last, child's college tuition, so we're FREE!!!!). So I can't say I can relate to your particular circumstances, however....

I have many friends who just hate to part with a nickel to spend on a vacation. I just don't get it. I've seen too many people save every penny for a rainy day or for retirement. Unfortunately, sometimes things happen in life and one never gets to enjoy it. Maybe you should remind your husband that you never see a hearse pulling a U-Haul. Not to be morbid, but you should live life (and of course, be smart with your money), but enjoy life as you live it. You only get one chance at it.

Good luck and I wish you and your husband many years of happiness and happy, healthy children in your future. But take time out to smell the roses along the way....[/quote]

Jersey girl, you hit the nail on the head in my opinion. Your response reminded me of a writing I read years ago that sticks in my mind. To the OP show your husband this....it may make him rethink his attitude on vacations...it hit home with me years ago.

kitty

[FONT=Arial][SIZE=4]The Station
[/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial,Helvetica][SIZE=3]by Robert J. Hastings

Tucked away in our subconscious minds is an idyllic vision. We see ourselves on a long, long trip that almost spans the continent. We're traveling by passenger train, and out the windows we drink in the passing scene of cars on nearby highways, of children waving at a crossing, of cattle grazing on a distant hillside, of smoke pouring from a power plant, of row upon row of corn and wheat, of flatlands and valleys, of mountains and rolling hills, of biting winter and blazing summer and cavorting spring and docile fall.
But uppermost in our minds is the final destination. On a certain day at a certain hour we will pull into the station. There sill be bands playing, and flags waving. And once we get there so many wonderful dreams will come true. So many wishes will be fulfilled and so many pieces of our lives finally will be neatly fitted together like a completed jigsaw puzzle. How restlessly we pace the aisles, damning the minutes for loitering ... waiting, waiting, waiting, for the station.
However, sooner or later we must realize there is no one station, no one place to arrive at once and for all. The true joy of life is the trip. The station is only a dream. It constantly outdistances us.
"When we reach the station, that will be it !" we cry. Translated it means, "When I'm 18, that will be it ! When I buy a new 450 SL Mercedes Benz, that will be it ! When I put the last kid through college, that will be it ! When I have paid off the mortgage, that will be it ! When I win a promotion, that will be it ! When I reach the age of retirement, that will be it ! I shall live happily ever after !"
Unfortunately, once we get it, then it disappears. The station somehow hides itself at the end of an endless track.
"Relish the moment" is a good motto, especially when coupled with Psalm 118:24: "This is the day which the Lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it." It isn't the burdens of today that drive men mad. Rather, it is regret over yesterday or fear of tomorrow. Regret and fear are twin thieves who would rob us of today.
So, stop pacing the aisles and counting the miles. Instead, climb more mountains, eat more ice cream, go barefoot oftener, swim more rivers, watch more sunsets, laugh more and cry less. Life must be lived as we go along. The station will come soon enough. All Rights Reserved
Robert J. Hastings Estate [FONT=Arial,Helvetica][SIZE=2]
[/SIZE][/FONT][/SIZE][/FONT]

[trvlcrzy]

[URL="http://www.houseofpancake.com/index.php?action=viewVideoGallery&gid=36&page=0"]http://www.houseofpancake.com/index.php?action=viewVideoGallery&gid=36&page=0[/URL]

Get him to watch these videos! I felt like I was on the ship again... It was the Star, but it reminded me so much of the CB. The music is great, too!

[osiebosie]

Our friends conceived their one and only baby on board a ship!!! :eek: :D

In fact, they had been told they couldn't conceive!

That could be a nice way to start a family...

Shay

P.S. My daughter's husband also grew up not vacationing, where we took our kids everywhere all the time. After a couple of vacations with her/us, he began to love traveling. Now he wants to go all of the time. In fact, they are now expecting, and trying to get in their last traveling before the baby gets here next March. They know they'll be able to travel after the baby, but for a while it will be a different type of travel.

Good luck!

Shay

[DqALEX]

[quote name='Anatresia']My husband wants to cancel our cruise. He states his reasons as being he doesn't want to travel the Saturday before Easter (we leave on Easter) and he doesn't want to spend the money.

Financially, we are in a good place right now. We're both working, with young professional level salaries. We have no kids. We have a house that we can more than afford, two newish cars, and no debt. We have a savings account that the cruise will not put much of a dent into. In fact, his Christmas bonus will more than cover the remainder that we owe, and the airfare is already paid for.

We are very practical spenders. This was supposed to be the one big thing we did before we have kids. The one time to splurge on US. I should add that our honeymoon was so boring- we rented a house in Florida for a week- big deal- because he didn't want to do anything more expensive. I feel that I sacrificed then and I want one real vacation before we have children, because I know he won't want to travel anywhere once they arrive, and it won't be the same if we did!

This is not the first time he's brought up cancelling and everytime we have a big discussion and he decides we'll still go. Then a few months later, he does it all over again. Just to stress me out, I guess. I'm wishing we booked and went right away, instead of booking so far off!

Bottom line is I'm not cancelling and he IS going and I'm pretty sure he will love it. But I don't know how to get him to shut up about it until we get there. And it would be amazing and incredible if he were half as excited as I am- those of you with happy husbands/wives are very lucky!

Any suggestions? I'm sure most of you will think he's completely out of his mind, since you all love cruising so much!!!:D[/QUOTE]
Its time to trade up. LOL tell him to stay home and call a friend and still go

[SheilaS]

Just sounds like typical male behavior to me and it is a trick that I can't quite master. My husband uses it all the time. He gets in a couple reasons [U]now[/U] why you shouldn't go, and then if something goes wrong it is [I]all [B]your[/B] fault[/I]. :D
I like you. You seem like a level-headed young lady with lots of common sense. The [B]both[/B] of you will have a great time!

Sheila<-----------been cruising once a year for 8 years now:cool:

PS. I sometimes call it commitment remorse. Once my husband commits to it, he starts to think of all the other stuff he could be doing or spending the money on that week and it makes him crazy. I just reassure him it will be great, he will love it (and he does) and then block out the rest of it.;)

[Anatresia]

[quote name='SheilaS']Just sounds like typical male behavior to me and it is a trick that I can't quite master. My husband uses it all the time. He gets in a couple reasons [U]now[/U] why you shouldn't go, and then if something goes wrong it is [I]all [B]your[/B] fault[/I]. :D
I like you. You seem like a level-headed young lady with lots of common sense. The [B]both[/B] of you will have a great time!

Sheila<-----------been cruising once a year for 8 years now:cool:

PS. I sometimes call it commitment remorse. Once my husband commits to it, he starts to think of all the other stuff he could be doing or spending the money on that week and it makes him crazy. I just reassure him it will be great, he will love it (and he does) and then block out the rest of it.;)[/QUOTE]

I think you've hit the nail on the head- thank you for that!

[nealstuber]

[quote name='trvlcrzy'][URL="http://www.houseofpancake.com/index.php?action=viewVideoGallery&gid=36&page=0"]http://www.houseofpancake.com/index.php?action=viewVideoGallery&gid=36&page=0[/URL]

Get him to watch these videos! I felt like I was on the ship again... It was the Star, but it reminded me so much of the CB. The music is great, too![/QUOTE]
trvlcrzy -
Thank you so much for sharing your videos. Never seen home videos done so well. You made our morning!