Travel without the kids!!!

[niso2]

Hi All,

We are considering a 7 inght cruise - just the 2 (husband and me) of us and would be leaving the kids with the grandparents. We would really love to go on a cruise and know the kids would be well taken care of. My question is- has anyone on the board done this? And if so, do you have nay tips on how to stay in touch when at sea?

Thanks for the replies!

[sysguy]

Hi!

DH and I did this for our first cruise. It was the first time we'd been away from the kids (then 9 & 6) for longer than a night or two. They also stayed with grandparents so I knew they'd be fine but staying in touch was still really important for me.

 

DH sent an e-mail every day and his Dad would send one to us (DH is a techno-dweeb, I say that with love;) , and is on the net every day anyway) and we called from every port. We are Canadian but have American cell phones as using those is so much cheaper for us. The phone calls were more for our peace of mind, even if they were only 3 minutes long and the kidlets didn't get on the phone.

 

I was quite nervous about going, you know first time away from kids etc..but I found that by the end of day 2 I was not obsessively thinking about them!!:D I was able to relax and we had a wonderful time.

 

When we got home the little darlings were having so much fun at Grandma and Grandpa's that they didn't even come to the airport to pick us up!!:eek:

 

Have a wonderful, relaxing time and enjoy the "alone" time with your DH. It'll be great.

 

Cindra

[Karysa]

We find e-mailing from ports to be the most economical way to keep in touch with our children.

I also left them little (dollar store) gifts and a hand written note to be opened every day. My mom told me that they looked forward to the gift but that they also liked hearing about what our plans were for each day. My oldest told my mom that even on a cruise ship mom was still their to remind them to brush their teeth!;)

The best advise that I got was from my older wiser DSis who told me that I should either go and relax knowing that everything is in order and they are in good hands or don't go at all. It was if I dropped a 100lb weight when I took my first step onto the ship. I totally surrendered and we had a wonderful vacation. All of us!:)

Enjoy your cruise.

Karysa

[Sweetest Sin]

Hi, our first two cruises we left our daughter with her grandparents. We use a combination of email and cell phone. We generally will take at least one vacation a year without our daughter, and have never had a problem keeping in contact. Go and have fun!

[Dr_DNA]

I don't get that much time off so if I'm going to spend a week cruising, I'm going to cruise with my entire family. That it is a personal preference though. By all means, if you want to have a romatic getaway, do it! For us, the good thing about a cruise is that we can spend lots of time together as a family. But, because of the kids club, my wife and I can also have some alone time together too. I personally think it is the best of both worlds!

[6rugrats]

We go on a vaction without the kids every year. I highly recommend it. It's easy to keep in touch by email and cell phone.

[Robin & Dan]

We did a cruise just us when DS was almost 3 and DD was 1. It was awesome. We were always soooo tired with the 2 kids, and the relaxing week long cruise was heaven. Just know, reality hits you like a brick when you step foot back in your home.

 

Last summer we did the family cruise and we're going back again this summer, kids are 5 and 3 now. We did get quite a bit of adult time with the kids in camp or us out on the balcony while they slept, but in no way did that time compare to a 7 day cruise without the kids.

 

Kids were well and good with my folks, we e-mailed from the ship, not everyday. I don't think we called.

 

robin

[mytee4ever]

This summer will be the first time that we will be cruising with the children. So, my panic is the total opposite of yours!:eek: Your parents will take great care of your kids. My mom has come to our house to stay with our children for each of our cruises. We get home & the house is usually cleaner than we left it, the kids are well fed & usually happy to see us!:D

 

Go, relax knowing that the children will be fine & have a great time. Use e-mail to stay in touch. Doesn't work for us as my mom is a technophobe, but we do reach our oldest that way.

 

Towanda

[Onessa]

My parents spent a week each year away on vacation. My sister and I stayed with our Aunt and her family. While we had a great time with our cousins and were very well taken care of, I can tell you that 40+ years later (or in my sister's case 50+ years later) both my sister and I keenly recall these trips.

 

While my sister seemed to be more deeply impacted by it (she is nearly 7years older than I and thus remembered what it was like prior to Mom and Dad "leaving" her every year). Now days it seems many people leave their kids behind, but when I was a child, few people took vactions so maybe that is part of the reason it was such a "big deal"

 

Not all children are effected this way -- and your normal relationship with your children is also important. It important on how you present the situation to your children, the timing of the trips (they twice missed my birthday 12YO and 16YO, and also missed school and extra curricular activities for both of us), and be certain that your children are ready for the situation.

[6rugrats]

While my sister seemed to be more deeply impacted by it

 

I am not exactly sure what you mean by this. Fifty years later, and your sister is still upset because your parents were gone one week out of the year? What about the other 51 weeks when you were all together?

 

If that's what you are saying, I honestly think it's a little strange and wonder what the rest of the story is.

 

My kids keenly recall the week mom and dad are away because of all the fun they have without us!

[crusinmama06]

A cruise, no. My oldest would try to disown me. :eek: ;)

 

But we did take a business trip to Florida a month ago and had to leave the kids with the inlaws. I did miss the kids terribly. :( But they were fine. And it's nice remembering life as a couple again. :) We always forget what brought us together to begin with. So it's nice to take some time alone to remember that again.

[calikak]

When I was a kid, my parents used to send my sister and I away to summer camp at the same time, so they'd have a week to themselves where they could take a vacation together or just enjoy alone time at home. As a college student I worked at the same camp I used to go to as a kid, and while a few kids would be homesick a little bit of the time, the vast majority of them were having the time of their lives all week. I know I sure did as a kid! DH and I are planning to send our son to camp when he's school-aged (he's only 10 months old now, a little young to be starting sleep-away camp :D) and enjoy a vacation alone together while he's at camp.

[niso2]

Thanks for all the advice- we decided to go and will be headed to Mexico on the Spirit in a couple of weeks!

The kids seem to be ok (and me so far, too!), However, like Michelle, they are wondering when they get to take their next cruise! We took the Golden Princess back in October 2007 and the NCL Star March 2007 with them and had a blast.

(if you have questions about the 2 ships let me know and I will try to help).

I get 5 weeks vacation a year so I feel pretty ok with taking one week- I am just kinda nervous about the middle of the week when I imagine I will wake up and really miss them and be in Mexico and realize we still have mroe days... But then, I think- why not, They are with their grandparents (who live right near us) and they see them a lot and are really comfortable with them.

So, I am going to do it a (all paid for now) and see how it goes.

[Onessa]

While my sister seemed to be more deeply impacted by it

 

I am not exactly sure what you mean by this. Fifty years later, and your sister is still upset because your parents were gone one week out of the year? What about the other 51 weeks when you were all together?

 

They only started the trips after I was born -- she somehow internalized it as my "fault" that they left. It has effected our relationship.

 

My father never made any attempt to "cover" that they "NEEDed to get away" from the kids. Now that I have a daughter (and my sister has a family as well) neither of us can understnad the "need to get away" from our kids. We both like our kids and thus both really cannot understand what we might have done that was so bad that our parents needed to get away from us.

 

A lot of it was that when I was young no really travelled, the mere fact that my parents were taking a trip was big news -- so of course everyone made a big deal of the fact that we were "left behind". It was kind of an ugly world back in the late sixties/early seventies. The fact that my mother worked outside of the house was scandalous as it was.

[dolphinwyo]

It will be relaxing for you, a different kind of fun that grown ups need once in a while for sure! We left my kids with my mother while we went to Cancun. I was nervous about being out of the country and out of touch, but I bought a calling card to use at payphones instead of using the hotel phone, and called everyday. Also - one thing I put together was a folder with important information - I had a guardian form with medical release completed in case they needed to see a doctor while we were away, a list of medications and dosing instructions, phone numbers of friends to call if she needed anything, and things like that. My family laughed that I was a little obsessive, but it was one less thing for me to worry about. We also left small gifts and notes for each morning. The kids had a great time with grandma and were spoiled rotten while we were gone. Most vacations we take them, but once in a while it is nice to truly relax. Enjoy!

[Giggles2007]

My first 2 cruises, I left my kids with their grandparents. They missed me but what kid doesn't have fun with their grandparents.

 

Prior to my trip, I would take them to the store and they all got to pick out something to play with while I was gone. Whether it was video games or art supplies. I told them that I would call as much as I could but there would be times that my cell could not get a signal. I also told them, if they just wanted to hear my voice then they could try calling me and if I did not answer, then just leave me a message. Although at times I could not be reached, I think it made them feel alot better just listening to my voicemail and being able to talk to it as if they were talking to me.

 

Now I am about to embark on cruise #3 and the kids are going with me this time. I am really excited because they are excited about their first cruise.

[MellowMel]

My DH and I take one trip a year without the kids. This year, we are actually doing two! It's great for our marriage and this benefits our children! I don't feel sorry for our kids. They are exposed to wonderful vacations (In 2008, my kids have gone or will go to Sea World San Antonio twice, been to New Braunfels (Schlitterbahn Water Park), been on a 7-day cruise to Alaska, been to Disney World and taken a 4-day cruise to the Bahamas.) They are not left behind! They love the time spent with Grandma and Grandpa. That's a vacation to them in itself!

 

The first time we left them, I felt horrible guilt for having time off from work and not being with them. Then I felt guilty for looking forward to having one-on-one time with my husband. But we had so much fun and were able to reconnect and that just makes us stronger. The last sea day is the one that I just can't wait to get home to see them. That's the benefit to cruising without them. You aren't that sad that your cruise is over because you get to see your kids again!

 

We communicate with them through email. We choose not to call them because DH can sometimes be a drama queen and she does better when we can't call them. She loves checking the email though to see what we've done and what we've bought them!

 

Enjoy your cruise and the time spent with your husband! You deserve it!

[dolphinwyo]

Isn't parental guilt fun? Even when there are with us on a cruise - I felt guilty if they were at camp babysitting and we were out and about on the ship, even though they were fine.....and usually sleeping....oh well! Part of being a mom I guess!

[niso2]

You guys are so great- it is so true "part of being a mom is the guilt!". The kids are looking forward to the week at Grandma and Grandpa- My work mates seem to be happy for me to go on vacation- now it is time to have fun.

They have already been on 2 cruises and have gone to Mexico and Disney and they are only 4 and 7! So, this one is for us and I have planned a few long weekends when I get back for just mom and kid time.

I cannot belive in 5 days I will be in in San Diego and ready to cruise!