Bad Tablemates

[Petron]

Hello we are taking our first cruise this July on Celebrity Summit and one of our worries is sitting with a group that's not too "enlightened".

 

So could you spill your tablemate horror stories and how you coped with them?

 

Thanks!

[julieanne]

Oh my goodness! We had a large group on our last TA. Hubby and I are straight, but we knew in advance and many on our roll call board ended up dining together! Maybe that's a good suggestion? We had a terrific time with our group. Some encountered a few problems, but chose to move to other tables. :D

[Boytjie]

Hello we are taking our first cruise this July on Celebrity Summit and one of our worries is sitting with a group that's not too "enlightened".

 

So could you spill your tablemate horror stories and how you coped with them?

 

Thanks!

 

Oh, you can have problems with table mates even on an all-gay charter! Luckily we have not had too many of those, the worst being a couple on our Alaska cruise that we thought may have wanted to be at a more fabulous table than ours. Trying to keep a conversation going was so difficult, they answered all questions with mono-syllabic answers... "yes"... "no"... As we left after dinner my partner said to me "I have never worked so hard at trying to keep a conversation going!"

 

Then again, at other times we have encountered people at a table that we thought would make for a bad experience and it turned out quite the opposite; they were sweetest people you could imagine.

[MattInFLL]

There is truly a simple solution to this dilemma - change tables.

 

Seriously, people do it all the time. No one will be offended, and even if they are, you are doing nothing more than trying to enjoy your vacation.

 

And even when they say the dining room is "full" - $20 goes a long way (or even $10). There are some very nice maitre d' s out there who will "understand" and try to put you at a "friendlier" table. The other option these days is to simply eat in an alternative restaurant or in the buffet - the buffets have become extremely popular for dinners.

 

That said, of the now 14 or so times we have been assigned to a table, we have managed to have mostly positive experiences. In fact the only time I ever even thought of changing was on a gay group cruise, where we were seated with others in the group :)

[stebul]

Do not hesitate to change tables. People do it all the time.

 

We had the table mates from hell on a Celebrity cruise once. On the first night, the wives stayed in so it was just two husbands who were traveling together. One guy ordered 5 sodas. The waiter said he could only bring one at a time. The guy said he wanted 5, and he would keep sending him back until he had 5 sodas. He got his 5 sodas. Then he ordered multiple appetizers and entrees, making a dramatic scene about sending the ones back that he didn't like. They asked us how we could be away from work for 2 weeks. They asked us how much vacation time we had. Seriously, one of them looked like Larry Flynt and when we later saw his wife -- you got it, Tammy Faye.

 

We changed tables immediately, and ended up with great table mates for the rest of the cruise. Fortunately, we've only had to change once on about 10 cruises. The rest of the time we have had some great conversations with fellow passengers.

[Loftguys]

Have you ever been able to figure out how they matched up people at one table? On our last regular cruise, they put the three of us at a 4top so it wasnt even an issue. We ended up chatting with the people around us at the other booths.

 

dave

[flag fan]

I had the dilemma of a problem table on the Summit earlier this year. My two tablemates were great people, but they were a young couple whose primary language was Spanish (Summit sailed from San Juan and there were a lot of Spanish-speaking passengers on the ship; I don't speak Spanish). Although they were very pleasant and spoke to me in English that first night's dinner, it was clear that it was a strain for them so I absented myself from the table for the rest of the cruise. I did not bother switching tables, just ate at alternative locations--buffet a couple of nights, the casual eatery one night, the specialty restaurant (Normandie) one night, room service another night. Although I don't know what I missed by not eating in the main restaurant (gourmet food is not a priority with me), my only real regret is that I did not have another dinner in the Normandie--it was fantastic. Be sure to plan to eat there at least one night.

 

There are a lot of posts on various boards about traditional dining vs. freestyle/anytime dining. As long as there are a number of alternative restaurants, you're not stuck dining at the same table at the same time each night, even on a ship with only traditional dining offered.

[voyagerx]

My partner and I will be taking our 40th cruise in July and have rarely had a problem with table mates. A couple of times one couple at the table changed as they just didn't fit in with the rest, as they were just too out of it to follow the conversation. Sadly, my most unpleasant "table mate" experience occurred on a xatlantic crossing at a table with 4 gays who were friends traveling together. They often excluded us from their conversation and one was just totally nasty.

 

If the ship has assigned seating, it is only for dinner. Breakfast and lunch are alway open seating.

 

Our 35+ positive experiences have been mostly with all the others seated at the table being straight. Being amusing and a good conversationalist generally overrides any concern about sexual orientation. We don't flaunt but also don't hide.

 

I, personally, would never deny myself the pleasure of meeting new people or allow myself to be forced to eat in a cafeteria or alternative restaurant. Mealtimes on ship are a major part of the cruising experience. Don't let anyone spoil it for you.

 

Finally, many lines now have an open seating option. Find other gays (FOD meetings are just about de rigeur on all ships now) or people you meet at breakfast or lunch or at cocktail time and make arrangements to have dinner with them. If it works out, you can do it regularly.

[yaletown605]

we love the open dining option. This way, I am not forced to sit with people I don't know nor may not like. With open sitting, we get to choose who we dine with. That is why we cruise Princess a lot. We always are vigilante to ask for a table for 2 in assigned dining. We line up as soon as we get on board and ask to change.

[jmraggs]

Sadly, my most unpleasant "table mate" experience occurred on a xatlantic crossing at a table with 4 gays who were friends traveling together. They often excluded us from their conversation and one was just totally nasty.

 

That's why my partner and I only sail on "straight" cruises because of that. On my vacation, we don't want to deal with any of the gay drama issues that some people may have. We are simple outgoing friendly guys that just love meeting people and having fun. Some gays have way too much attitude for there own good.

[Boytjie]

That's why my partner and I only sail on "straight" cruises because of that. On my vacation, we don't want to deal with any of the gay drama issues that some people may have. We are simple outgoing friendly guys that just love meeting people and having fun. Some gays have way too much attitude for there own good.

 

I am sure one can get as much attitude and bad manners amongst straights on a regular cruise.

 

We have had 2 dinners in 3 seven-day gay cruises where there were some people with attitude or a rude streak, the rest have been most enjoyable. Disclosure: on the last cruise we ate mostly with a variety people we have met on the previous two cruises, some who have become friends of ours by now.

[jmraggs]

I am sure one can get as much attitude and bad manners amongst straights on a regular cruise.

 

We have had 2 dinners in 3 seven-day gay cruises where there were some people with attitude or a rude streak, the rest have been most enjoyable. Disclosure: on the last cruise we ate mostly with a variety people we have met on the previous two cruises, some who have become friends of ours by now.

 

I agree with you completely, you can get attitude anywhere you go, but we have only received it from fellow gays where we are supposed to support each other in this prejudice world we live in.

 

We have had 18 RCL "straight" cruises and have only had one person that "seemed" to have a problem with us (my perception) and all others on the cruise were great and welcoming to us. It's not like were goofy guys, we are both average straight acting professional in shape guys that will talk to anybody without any attitude as we think different types of people make the world go around. It's the inside of the person that matters to us, not the outside!:D

 

It would just ruin my cruise if I was on board a ship with other gays with attitude and rudeness as I cruise to relax and have fun!:)

[DCT61]

UHHHH...........never mind. Its just not worth it...LOL

[Boytjie]

I agree with you completely, you can get attitude anywhere you go, but we have only received it from fellow gays where we are supposed to support each other in this prejudice world we live in.

 

We have had 18 RCL "straight" cruises and have only had one person that "seemed" to have a problem with us (my perception) and all others on the cruise were great and welcoming to us. It's not like were goofy guys, we are both average straight acting professional in shape guys that will talk to anybody without any attitude as we think different types of people make the world go around. It's the inside of the person that matters to us, not the outside!:D

 

It would just ruin my cruise if I was on board a ship with other gays with attitude and rudeness as I cruise to relax and have fun!:)

 

I don't feel that I have to act in any way, I am just myself. ;)

 

Don't the straight people with attitudes ruin your cruises? :confused:

[Boytjie]

Double post

[chrisbd1]

Freestyle. Table for two every night for dinner. No tablemates from hell. Heaven :) .

[MattInFLL]

You know on Majesty last Fall, I was upset we did not get a table for 2, because I figured I did not want to deal with the whole dinner companion thing and it was our anniversary weekend. But there were no tables for 2, and we were at a 6 top, and ended up having a ball with our table mates. I have met some wonderful people over dinner, and as much I like the idea of Freestyle, there is something to be said for the traditional dining experience on a cruise, too.

[jmraggs]

You know on Majesty last Fall, I was upset we did not get a table for 2, because I figured I did not want to deal with the whole dinner companion thing and it was our anniversary weekend. But there were no tables for 2, and we were at a 6 top, and ended up having a ball with our table mates. I have met some wonderful people over dinner, and as much I like the idea of Freestyle, there is something to be said for the traditional dining experience on a cruise, too.

 

We love the traditional dining as we enjoy meeting new people and chatting with them over dinner. We sail on Majesty 3-4 times a year and love that ship! It's funny you mention you were originally upset about not getting a table for two, I am the opposite, once they gave us a table for two and I was upset but I got over it pretty quickly:D . I know it's a random chance when they stick you with other people, but we have always been pretty lucky!:)

 

Maybe we'll see you on Majesty in the future!

[MandB]

We have never encountered direct rudeness at dinner. We have had people not show up after the first day (we once got a table for 8 all to ourselves for an entire cruise - I was ready to change deodorants). We have also met some of the nicest people in the world at our tables. The one I remember most was a retired New York police officer. We were at a table for 4 with him and his wife. I was expecting the worst but he could not have been nicer. It turned out his wife had advanced alzheimer's disease. I guess based on his past experiences he made a point of telling us that he would certainly understand if we asked to be moved to another table. We did not even consider moving and I am very glad we didn't because I got to know a remarkable man. To see the patience and love he showed toward his partner of many years, notwithstanding her current problems, was amazing. A lot of words to basically say I think the potential good side of dining with new people far outweighs the bad.

[d&a Delaware]

3 cruises (see signature). 3 tables for 8, late seating. Absolutely no problems. Costa cruise was fine, but both Celebrity cruises were GREAT! We were the only gay couple among the 8 people at each table. Please don't anticipate things being bad. And, as has already been posted, if it is a table situation you don't like, request a table change and/or eat in alternative venues. We are looking forward to more late seating tables for 8:) .

 

David