Tipping etiquite in the "Specialty" resturants

[FinelyCruising]

I had spoken to the Maitre D as well, but in a more social situation. At first he told me that he couldn't discuss this matter at all. I pressed him for an honest answer. He made me promise that I didn't hear this from him, but that only part of the service charge goes to the staff in the Specialty restaurant. It is pooled by everyone. I asked him how much of the Service charge went to the staff, and after trying to change the subject several times he told me 1/3 of the service charge goes to the staff and 2/3 goes to the restaurant budget.

 

If this is the case, coupled with the site information that (gratuity) is what is being covered even if not 100%, this segment of staff is different then the wait staff in the main dining venues.

 

Regardless if it's a flat $30 paid to dine there, or more left for the service by individual choices, these servers have a very captive audience, it's not a venue that is lacking customers, and IMHO there must be quite a bit of money made night after night on these cruise ships in these specialty restaurants by this staff.

 

I think they make much, much more than a waiter in the main dining room, who may work much, much harder to achieve satisfaction levels with the nightly guests they provide service for.

[MonaCD]

That's an important point to recognize. The fact is that our relationship with the crew on board a ship is, at its heart, one of service provider to customer. They are doing their job, for which they get paid. We pay them, through our cruise fares and gratuities, to provide us with a service. They are not there to make friends with us...they are there to earn a living. If they give us the illusion that they are our friends, that only means they are doing their job well - but we need to remember that it IS an illusion. Keep in mind that every week or two, they get a whole new set of customers. If they made friends with customers from every cruise, they'd have more friends than they'd know what to do with!

 

We are not their friends...and nor are we their benefactors. We are their customers. As such, I do not feel a need to give them any more money than they earn through the service they provide. I expect them to meet my expectations, and if they do, I don't see any reason to hand them more cash. If they go beyond the norm and exceed my expectations by a significant amount, I may add to the standard gratuity by a comparable margin.

 

I work hard for my money, and I'm not in the habit of handing it out to people I don't know, for no reason.

Well said LeeAnne. I agree whole heartedly. I was one who tended to over tip, it was kind of a guilt thing I think, also the fact that I spent a brief period as a waitress in my youth. Since I met my partner, he’s re-trained me.

 

I don’t go on cruises to make friends with the staff. I respect and appreciate them and what they do for us while on holiday. I will sometimes make small talk with them, learn a bit about them and where they are from but mostly I don’t go out of my way to create great friendships with them. Mostly I’m there to relax, de-stress and enjoy my time with my partner and friends if we happen to be cruising with them.

 

I had an experience similar to 96740. I was on the Carnival Glory over Christmas. We had an excellent waiter in the dining room. He called us by name the first time we arrived at our table. His wife worked on the ship as well and he introduced her to us. Every evening he told us about dining options for the following day or if there were any special events we should take in. He recommended certain things on the menu and when things were a bit slow coming from the kitchen he entertained us with magic tricks or his napkin "creatures" (that’s opposed to towel animals).

 

At the end of our cruise we tipped him extra as we felt he had exceeded our expectations. We exchanged emails and hugs on the last night. I mentioned him particularly on my comment card and sent a separate letter to guest relations upon my return home in which I mentioned him as well as made other comments and criticisms about my cruise experience.

 

A few weeks later I found I was going to be sailing on the same ship. I emailed our waiter to tell him so and never received a response. When I got onboard, I never saw him and I asked a few people in the dining room and none knew of him, this was only 3 months later! Did I feel cheated or fleeced by the false friendship, no. I wasn’t too upset, just would have been cool to have him as a waiter again. The waiters we did have were efficient and we were served promptly but they never called us by name, never even spoke to us other then to take our order, never exceeded our expectations. They did not receive any tip over what Carnival charged to our onboard account automatically. Our cabin steward on the other hand was exceptional and did receive extra.

 

Now back to the original question, I’ve only dined in a specialty restaurant a couple times. Once with a group of solo cruisers on the Legend and we each tipped $5 extra. The second time was with friends and they treated but I imagine, knowing them, they tipped generously.

 

Don’t even get me started on tipping at All Inclusive resorts where the tips are supposed to be included along with everything else!

[Lou33]

Now back to the original question, I’ve only dined in a specialty restaurant a couple times. Once with a group of solo cruisers on the Legend and we each tipped $5 extra. The second time was with friends and they treated but I imagine, knowing them, they tipped generously.

 

You referred to the original question from the OP (what is the proper way to tip), but your response seems to imply that an extra tip is expected. There is certainly nothing wrong with leaving an extra tip. It's a personal choice. But with regard to the original question, the recommended gratuity is already included, and a person absolutely should not feel obligated to leave an extra tip.

 

When tipping questions come up on this board, many of the generous tippers like to reply with comments like "of course we tip extra", "they work very hard", "they receive minimal pay", "we are very generous people". But I think people who usually leave the recommended tip will not bother to reply.

 

In case anyone is wondering, we've been to the specialty restaurants only a few times. To be honest, I don't remember if we left an extra tip or not.

[Leejnd4]

 

When tipping questions come up on this board, many of the generous tippers like to reply with comments like "of course we tip extra", "they work very hard", "they receive minimal pay", "we are very generous people". But I think people who usually leave the recommended tip will not bother to reply.

 

 

Hey, I replied! ;) And I openly state that I do not normally leave an additional tip. And I too am a very generous person. I just choose to dole my generosity out to either my own loved ones, or to legitimate charities, rather than to random service people that I encounter in my travels. :)

[MonaCD]

You referred to the original question from the OP (what is the proper way to tip), but your response seems to imply that an extra tip is expected. There is certainly nothing wrong with leaving an extra tip. It's a personal choice. But with regard to the original question, the recommended gratuity is already included, and a person absolutely should not feel obligated to leave an extra tip.

 

When tipping questions come up on this board, many of the generous tippers like to reply with comments like "of course we tip extra", "they work very hard", "they receive minimal pay", "we are very generous people". But I think people who usually leave the recommended tip will not bother to reply.

 

In case anyone is wondering, we've been to the specialty restaurants only a few times. To be honest, I don't remember if we left an extra tip or not.

I didn't mean to imply a tip was expected. It was my first time in a specialty restaurant and someone at the table who had been previously suggested we each leave a $5 tip, that's what made me feel obligated. I was not aware at the time that the $30 charge also covered gratuities so I just went along with the crowd. Would I tip over and above the $30 charge again? Only if the service exceeded our expectations.

[nycglitter]

I have to say that I am floored by the number of people who simply give the bare minimum when it comes to tipping. That is to say that despite superior service, the cover charge should be just fine. I know this will get me flamed on this board, but so be it. (putting on my flame retardant suit now)

 

Whether on land or at sea, if I receive service above and beyond what is necessary to do the job, I do feel that it warrants additional tipping. How much is once again personal choice and should be directly proportionate to the service rendered.

 

I don't know anyone, myself included who wants to make the bare minimum in their industry. I work hard to be recognized and then paid accordingly. I along with many others in a variety of industries receive bonus money for a job well done. I would certainly hate it if my bosses said that they were not in the habit of handing out money to anyone other than charity or their family. WOW, how would one ever feel appreciated?

 

 

This is just my opinion of course and I am sure that most on this thread won't agree. I am a generous person, but wise in doing so. I, like others, am not in the habit of throwing around money for no reason, but if it is earned then I am more than happy to hand it over. In the end my vacation was made better by the person who went above and beyond (whether for just that night, or beyond.)

[FinelyCruising]

When tipping questions come up on this board, many of the generous tippers like to reply with comments like "of course we tip extra", "they work very hard", "they receive minimal pay", "we are very generous people". But I think people who usually leave the recommended tip will not bother to reply.

 

 

Lou--I think you and Brucen and I Fly did a good job keeping it on track for this topic. Bruce got the facts out there indicating the per person charge and the amount of it, with the indication it covers a gratuity. I Fly got it out there that about one-third of the charge is for gratuity, so that then can be quantified as $10.00 per person.

 

I think the comments that I quoted from you above are more commonly found on the tipping threads that relate to dining room staff, and do identify the majority of the commonly expressed heartfelt ideas that motivate others to be generous with those staff members and the reasons why.

 

I think the specialty dining staff is not considered in any ways similar, and the question raised by the OP is a prime example of the fair amount of confusion as to what the dining charge is for and what to do next about it, if anything.

 

Breaking it down mathematically, the charge per person apportioned to the food upcharge component is $20.00. So to have $10.00 go to gratuity is pretty darn good. For a couple $40.00 is the meal component and $20.00 is the gratuity componenet. That is a 50% tip.

 

I recognize that we are so programmed to understand the value of a high end meal and exceptional service that we think leaving nothing other than the admission seems irregular.

 

So leave that $30.00 break-out to stand alone and let the math equation be the guide rather than a matter of concern, and not like anyone needs to hear it from me, if anyone wants to leave more now that the math is in front of you because it makes you feel good for what you have received, then I say Karma knows.

 

Just for additional illustration a little outside the box, and putting this venues mathematical gratuity against the wait staff gratuity in the dining room, this one night hopefully earns a shared amount for the main dining room waiter and his/her assistant $12.00 per couple versus the automatic $20.00 shared in the specialty venue.

[Lou33]

I have to say that I am floored by the number of people who simply give the bare minimum when it comes to tipping.

 

If Celebrity publishes guidleines and says "This covers gratuities", then it means exactly what it says. They didn't say: "This service charge covers the bare minimum, and if the customer has generosity of a piece of coal, they will surely leave an extra tip".

 

I think a $20 tip/couple for dinner (food only, not wine) is a substantial tip. I would not consider this to be the bare minimum at all. If you chose to leave an extra $50 on top of that, then you are a very, very generous and/or rich person.

[SusieV]

We ate in Ocean Liners for half our last cruise on the Constellation and had absolutely fabulous service. We chose to give an extra $10/person gratuity to the dining staff (we felt the sommelier was taken care of given our taste in wine) because it was a wonderful experience and we wanted to thank the staff for it.

 

It has nothing to do with how much money they make or charity or whatnot (not sure how those things are at all relevant), it is simply a show of appreciation for helping us have a special evening.

[Leejnd4]

I have to say that I am floored by the number of people who simply give the bare minimum when it comes to tipping. That is to say that despite superior service, the cover charge should be just fine. I know this will get me flamed on this board, but so be it. (putting on my flame retardant suit now)

 

I have no intention to flame - but I do want to clarify, as your post hints that those of us who don't as a rule tip extra are somehow being ungenerous.

 

As Lou33 so aptly pointed out, none of us said we tip the "bare minimum". What we tip is what is asked of us. Not only that, we ALL stated that if we received "superior" service, we would feel compelled to leave more.

 

The key distinction is how you define "superior" service. You yourself defined it as "above and beyond what is necessary to do the job." I agree. The reality, however, is that I have rarely received service beyond what I would expect at a restaurant of the calibre of Celebrity's specialty dining rooms. Consequently, I have rarely felt compelled to tip higher than the expected amount.

 

I don't know anyone, myself included who wants to make the bare minimum in their industry. I work hard to be recognized and then paid accordingly. I along with many others in a variety of industries receive bonus money for a job well done. I would certainly hate it if my bosses said that they were not in the habit of handing out money to anyone other than charity or their family. WOW, how would one ever feel appreciated?

 

Um...first of all, I'm not the waiter's boss. I'm their customer. They DO get a paycheck beyond tips. I tip what is asked - not the "bare minimum", but the full, specific amount that is requested. IF they do an exceptional job, I increase the tip accordingly. Where's the problem?

 

I personally feel appreciated by getting paid at all - and by positive feedback. If I do a good job, I expect to get appropriate increases in salary commensurate with my performance. As, I'm sure, the waiters do. But again, I'm not the waiter's boss, so that's not my area of concern in that relationship.

[Leejnd4]

It has nothing to do with how much money they make or charity or whatnot (not sure how those things are at all relevant), it is simply a show of appreciation for helping us have a special evening.

 

I explained above why I brought "those things" up. Here, I'll re-post it:

 

The only reason I mentioned the charity issue is that on these tipping threads, you always get a bunch of posts telling everyone they need to tip more because these waiters are so underpaid, and they work so hard, and they come from such deprived circumstances, and gosh darn it they DESERVE it. The issue of how hard they work and how little they get paid is always raised, as a reason for handing out extra tips. My feeling is, there are lots of people out there who come from deprived circumstances and don't make a lot of money, and I can't hand out cash to every one I encounter. I help people in need through legitimate charities.

 

That's why I mentioned it. It was brought up early in this thread that some people feel a need to tip extra because the waiters "work so hard for so little money". That, to me, is not a valid reason to hand out additional cash. Lots of people work hard for little money - and if I felt a need to hand all of them extra cash out of my own pocket, I'd end up broke myself!

 

If I win the lottery, I might start tossing around fifties to strangers. But not until.

[FinelyCruising]

I think a $20 tip/couple for dinner (food only, not wine) is a substantial tip. I would not consider this to be the bare minimum at all. If you chose to leave an extra $50 on top of that, then you are a very, very generous and/or rich person.

 

Lou, I think people really don't know what the $30.00 stands for, and that is the crux of the problem. People don't know what to leave, so they almost feel like they have to *pay* for the meal again out of guilt since $60.00 is too light a price to pay for such a great and fabulous dinner, including tips, as we know from our experiences in our day to day lives away from cruises. :o

[Brucen]

I will weigh in one more time here. It is everyones personal choice how much to "reward" someone for exceptional service. For me, when I go to a local restaurant I know that the servers depend on my tip to make up their salary. I generally tip 20% in recognition of that if they give me the expected (good) service. If something stands out, I will tip more but I figure they signed up for this job knowing they would get 20% if they DID A GOOD JOB. There is no other job that provides such immediate feedback on your performance. If you are not getting 20% as a server, you had best look to what you are doing wrong.

 

Celebrity says that the $30.00 covers gratuities. They do not suggest tipping more. They advertise the specialty venues as an exceptional meal with exceptional service. That is what you should get for your $30.00. I am not sure what would be above "exceptional" service that would warrant an additional tip. Celebrity says the $30.00 gets you exceptional service - not "good" service. I guess I will decide for myself on our upcoming Connie cruise this October. We will be eating in the specialty restaurant and I will decide then if and how much extra to tip.

 

Finally I have to comment on the "friends" people make with the staff. One of my best friends is a wedding photographer. When he is shooting your wedding it is THE MOST beautiful, charming, classy, whatever wedding he has ever seen. The wedding party is the most charming, beautiful, funny, etc. he has ever seen. He says this for 2 main reasons. The first is that if the people at the wedding feel good and appreciated it makes his job easier, more fun and the photos come out better. The second reason is that if he is telling people these things, at that moment that is what he is thinking. Passing out compliments helps him get in and stay in the right frame of mind to do his job properly. While he has enjoyed visiting with people at the weddings he shoots, even exchanged e-mails etc. he has never become "friends" with any of them. The "friendship" is to situational and there usually is not really any thing much in common other than the time, place and a desire to hang out/joke with someone. I see obvious parallels to my friends behaviors and what I think the staff on X does.

 

The chances of really becoming friends (not friendly) with an X staffer seems remote to me. The fact that you can cruise and they can not even begin to afford that level of extravagance means you probably have very little in common. I did overhear a passenger on a cruise once "making friends" with a waiter. The intentions were great and the passenger was gracious and kind but many of the things they were saying showed that the passenger (even if they did not even know it) thought of the waiter as a special pet, not an equal. I was embarrased for the passenger and the waiter seemed uncomfortable but I think the passenger felt like he was doing a great job of making a lifelong friend.

 

Done with todays rant.

 

Best,

Bruce

[FinelyCruising]

No, not a rant, just a commentary that as we pass through life we make the acquaintance of many individuals along the way who have the ability to make our personal experience a positive one with lasting memories of a very favorable kind. :)

[Leejnd4]

Done with todays rant.

 

 

I agree with everything you wrote wholeheartedly. Well said. :)

[Ma Bell]

I must say that I don't go out of my way to make friends with all the staff on the ship but I have made friends with some. If you speak to them you may find that many of them are very well educated and are using their job as a stepping stone to another career. They are the same as you and I and certainly capable of friendship just as anyone else you may meet.

I receive regular emails from a couple of crew that I have met and we have kept up our friendships for 6 to ten years. They no longer even work for Celebrity.

I look at them just as I would anyone else I might meet in my travels. I have quite a few very good friends that I've met as fellow passengers while sailing. We meet and spend time together even when not cruising.

[96740]

$30.00 for gratuity pp. So be it. NO MORE GAMES!

[Texed]

I have quite a few very good friends that I've met as fellow passengers while sailing.

 

And, hopefully, we will get to sail with you some day. :)

[Blanco-Grande]

Thousands for a cruise and not an extra penny for the staff..how cheap!!

I always reward extra service with extra tip..

As far as crew "friends" I have many that I keep in touch with for years.

They are highly educated intellectual people.

[Ma Bell]

And, hopefully, we will get to sail with you some day. :)

 

Thanks Ed, I'm really looking forward to that day.:D

[andver13]

Newbie here! First cruise will be Mar/09 on the Connie and we plan on going to the specialty restaurant. Extra tip is left in cash or charge to cabin card?

[Leejnd4]

Thousands for a cruise and not an extra penny for the staff..how cheap!!

I always reward extra service with extra tip..

 

I knew there would be a post like this. :rolleyes: There always is.

 

I haven't seen a single poster in this thread that deserves to be called "cheap". Realistic and pragmatic, yes. Cheap? No. Have you READ any of the posts above? Like the ones in which we say we DO reward "extra" service? The question is...how do YOU define "extra" service? I personally expect "extra" service to actually have a component of "extra" to it before I'm willing to hand my money to people I don't know.

[Brucen]

I am just back from going out to dinner with my son. To many margaritas so I am not sure how coherent this will be....

 

First off, Lee Anne, I have seen your posts on this and other threads and have been impressed with the clarity and common sense that you display in all of these sometimes heated discussions. I hope to run into you on a cruise some day. I will by you a drink of my smuggled single malt scotch :)

 

At tonights dinner with my son, the waiter was almost non existent. I gave him about a 12% tip (that was what rounded off to a convenient number) but the bus boy was exceptional. He really took care of my son and I. I slipped him the equivalent of a 25% (in cash) tip because he went WAY beyond the expectations I have for a bus boy. The waiter was lucky to get his 12%. God forbid it would have rounded off conveniently to less than 10% :-)

 

Like I said before, if you are not earning what is expected as a server, look to your own performance. It may not be 20% all the time, but with the averages you will do fine.

 

Tip what makes you feel good and able to sleep well at night. Do not worry about what I or any one else thinks is appropriate. If this thread has not definitively illustrated that you can not match everyones expectations, nothing ever will. Worry about your own expectations. Not mine or any one else's.

 

Good night now,

 

Best,

Bruce

[Brucen]

Thousands for a cruise and not an extra penny for the staff..how cheap!!

I always reward extra service with extra tip..

As far as crew "friends" I have many that I keep in touch with for years.

They are highly educated intellectual people.

 

 

I may be misunderstanding your point here. Please explain in more detail. The Celebrity web site says that I will get an exceptional meal with exceptional service for $30.00 per person and that covers the gratuity. If I pay the $30.00 how am I being cheap? I have seen the argument the the food is way better than you could buy on land for $30.00 but I am not sure those people are taking into account that if you are eating in the specialty restaurant you are not eating in the main dining room that you already paid for.

 

I believe the the cost of your meal in ANY restaurant has less to do with the cost of the raw materials of your meal than the cost of providing the ambiance that you eat it in. Since Celebrity is not really scrimping in the main dining room, I am not sure that the costs (to X) for dinner in the specialty restaurants is very much more than the cost per person in the dining room.

 

We will probably never know the real answer, but that is my belief. Does that make me cheap because I believe that $30.00 per person is adequate compensation for the staff that served me? If $30.00 is not enough, how much should I tip? I have seen previous posters say they tipped an extra $50.00. I can not imagine a restaurant experience where I would feel like I should tip $80.00 per person for my service. Not trying to be argumentative here, I would really appreciate some clarification to a point of view that I can not comprehend.

 

Thanks and good night,

 

Best,

Bruce

[nycglitter]

You all clearly have this topic mastered. Well done.

 

To the original OP, good luck!