Interesting topic on the CCL board - how young is too young?

[Onessa]

It really depends upon the child. We have an only child (DD 13YO) When she was younger, she never wanted to "sign out" early and now when we cruise she has always met a few girls near her age on board. Once we have gotten comfortable with the girls, we allow her to go out-and-about as long as she is with friends and follows "the rules" (where she can and cannot go, when she has to check in, curfew, etc.). She's always been pretty level headed and is more than happy to "bail" if her friends want to do something that she is not comfortable with.

 

My husband's grand-niece (who is six weeks older than our DD) has travelled with us a few times, and she needs extra rules and extra supervision. She's a sweet girl but is WAY too likely to sucumb to peer pressure.

 

As a parent I believe I need to give her limited independence now so that she can learn how to handle it. She is ref'ing soccer this summer, and I am amazed with the amount of confidence she has dealing with adult coaches and parents.

[Ellanora]

I appreciate this thread being started here, the first went around the bend pretty quickly, and lost sight of the original issue.

 

We started cruising when my son was 9, now he's 12. I have always signed the paper to allow him to sign himself out so he could participate in the scavenger hunts with the other kids. HOWEVER, I made it very clear to him that it was for the scavenger hunts only. We always go over the Camp schedule together and he chooses the activities he wants to go for, and we both know what time I'm coming back to get him. He was never to leave the approved activites and wander off alone, nor has he ever. If a counselor ever made him sign himself out and leave, I would be furious. Yes, he always knows how to find his way back to the cabin in case of emergency, but that's not the point. I left him in a certain place that advertises itself to be safe and fun. I expect to retrieve him from that same place.

 

That said, out latest cruise was on Disney Wonder, and included my cousin and her girls, one was 13, one 10. We allowed them slightly more freedom as long as they were together at all times. They still weren't able to wander the ship at will, but they were able to travel from Point A to Point B without our supervision, together. Safety in numbers, and all that.

 

I just don't feel comfortable letting him come and go at this age, because if the worst happened, I would live forever knowing that a simple rule on my part could have prevented it.

[gracie65]

I just read one of Michele's posts above about Camp Carnival kids & signing themselves in & out age 9-11 for Scavenger Hunts etc. It doesn't sound like you can make to where they can only for those type of things. I guess my question & concern is, has anyone ever done this & the child know they could sign themselves in & out but you made it a rule that they only could for the Scavenger Hunt. The child knew that at any other time they had to wait for the parent. Hope that makes sense.

My son will be a week away from 10 on our next cruise & it will be his 4th Carnival. I don't feel comfortable yet with his signing himself in & out but would consider it just so he could do the Scavenger Hunts. I realize I couldn't do it just for that but has anyone done this with the understanding with their child that this was the only occasion they could sign in & out? It sounds like the previous poster has had good luck with this, would like to know if others have had success.

[crusinmama06]

Gracie - I did with my 9 year old. She had to be given sign out privledges and was told that she was not allowed to use them for anything other than the scavenger hunts (there were 3).

 

I also told the counselors that I would be picking her up, that she wasn't allowed to leave. She also told the counselors "My mom wil be here to pick me up, so I'll just wait" (she was told by a counselor that she could just sign out and head back to the cabin :eek: )

 

Here is the bad part. The items on the scavenger hunt. After telling my daughter that she wasn't allowed to be in the "cabin hallways" during the scavenger hunt, wasn't I shocked when she came running into the cabin with a few girls behind her saying "We need the towel animal!!!!!"

 

The items on the scavenger hunt included bermuda shorts, swimsuits (boys and girls), toilet paper, sunglasses and a towel animal. So the camp girls thought it would be ok to grab these items from their cabins, including mine.

 

I was not happy that the "unsupervised hunt" turned into a hunt in the cabins. :(

[gracie65]

Michele: That's what I was afraid of. My son is a big 9 at 5'2 & weighing 135 pounds but still thinks like a 9 year old. So they just go in groups on the scavenger hunts? Didn't the counselors tell them they could only stay on the public decks?

[crusinmama06]

Michele: That's what I was afraid of. My son is a big 9 at 5'2 & weighing 135 pounds but still thinks like a 9 year old. So they just go in groups on the scavenger hunts? Didn't the counselors tell them they could only stay on the public decks?

 

 

Quoting my 9 year old...who is standing right here..lol

 

The counselors said:

--No using the elevators

--They didn't say anything about the public areas or cabin areas

--They didn't say where to get the things like the Towel Animals

--The first scavenger hunt was 2 groups of 3, the 2nd one was 4 groups of TWO

[crusinmama06]

Oh and I forgot to add that the counselor told me that she HAD to be given her SS card "just in case" :rolleyes: I stressed to them that I didn't want her going back to the cabin for any reason. And the counselors said "Oh, ok, well we just want everyone to have one"

[gracie65]

Based on that would you let her do it again, after now being able to give her stricter rules?

[gracie65]

Oh and I forgot to add that the counselor told me that she HAD to be given her SS card "just in case" :rolleyes: I stressed to them that I didn't want her going back to the cabin for any reason. And the counselors said "Oh, ok, well we just want everyone to have one"

 

He's never been in this age group so far, they have always been wonderful but I can see where important instructions could get lost in translation since most of them are foreign.

[crusinmama06]

Based on that would you let her do it again, after now being able to give her stricter rules?

 

HAHAHAHAHAHA you don't want me to answer that question....lol :D I am hoping that RCCL doesn't have the same scavenger hunt in the cabin areas. If they do (and I will be requesting a copy of the list) then I will make sure she is not there for it. ;)

[gracie65]

HAHAHAHAHAHA you don't want me to answer that question....lol :D I am hoping that RCCL doesn't have the same scavenger hunt in the cabin areas. If they do (and I will be requesting a copy of the list) then I will make sure she is not there for it. ;)

 

How far into the week was the hunt?

[crusinmama06]

How far into the week was the hunt?

 

Ours was a 4 day cruise - at least one each day after Day 1

 

Names for the hunts were "Dress the Contestant", "Whats In The Bag", "People Bingo" and "Scavenger Hunt"

[boulders]

I am hoping that RCCL doesn't have the same scavenger hunt in the cabin areas. If they do (and I will be requesting a copy of the list) then I will make sure she is not there for it. ;)

 

Well, they had the scavenger hunt for the 9-11 age group 2 years ago on the Navigator. I distinctly remember because dd, who was 8 at the time, FORGOT that she was 8, and went with the older kids. :eek: She confessed later. :rolleyes: DD is bright, but scatterbrained at times.

[crusinmama06]

Well, they had the scavenger hunt for the 9-11 age group 2 years ago on the Navigator. I distinctly remember because dd, who was 8 at the time, FORGOT that she was 8, and went with the older kids. :eek: She confessed later. :rolleyes: DD is bright, but scatterbrained at times.

 

I know they have a scavenger hunt, but I was told that it was held on the open decks. We'll see. :D

[gracie65]

Ours was a 4 day cruise - at least one each day after Day 1

 

Names for the hunts were "Dress the Contestant", "Whats In The Bag", "People Bingo" and "Scavenger Hunt"

 

 

Thanks so much for the input. Ours is a 7-day. I guess this will be one of those situations where I will have to decide how comfortable I am or am not with it once we get there. It's great to have things to know to be on alert about because had it not been for your situation I would have thought it was fine & dandy to do!!!LOL I can't believe with the liabilty that they aren't required for each group to have a counselor????

[Cruising Aussie Mum]

We will let our 12 year-old daughter sign herself out on our next cruise in January - but with guidelines like only during the day and only going to meet up with us in public areas like the pool deck, buffet, etc. I wouldn't feel comfortable with her walking around alone in isolated hallways on cabin decks and, obviously, not going into strangers cabins or roaming the ship aimlessly.

 

She actually had sign-out privileges on our last cruise when she was 11 - but only because she had to have them to participate in the scavenger hunts - and she knew that was the only time she was allowed to sign herself out.

 

Our son will be 9 on our next cruise. We will give him sign-out privileges because of the scavenger hunts - but he will know that he is not allowed to sign himself out at any other time.

 

Both of my kids are quite responsible and safety conscious. They're not perfect but we can pretty well trust them to follow any rules like this that we set out for them.

[TimeYet?]

On our last 2 cruises, my son was 9 and I did not let him sign out for any reason. He didn't participate in any of the hunts and even though he thought he would feel left out, he didn't. He still had loads of fun.

 

My son is 11 now and I have decided to let him sign out for our cruise next month. He will have very stict ground rules complete with a signed contract just so there isn't anything left to interpretation. He knows full well that one slip-up will cause him to lose this much desired freedom.

I know that some think a contract is excessive, but I work with this age group kids (grade 6-8) on a daily basis and I know the contract works well for earning & losing benefits.

[crusinmama06]

I know that some think a contract is excessive, but I work with this age group kids (grade 6-8) on a daily basis and I know the contract works well for earning & losing benefits.

 

I think it's a great idea!!!! Kudos to you! :D

[happybooker1]

YIKES! This time next week we'll be @ sea!!!!! HOORAY.

 

But I digress. DS turned 12 in March. He is very levelheaded, very responsible, very trustworthy. Again, it's the OTHER folks I don't trust.

 

We will have walkie-talkies which, hopefully will work (most of the time). As soon as he finds some 'buddies' to hang with, I will relax the rules somewhat if he stays 'with the group' as they mostly tend to do. Until then, we will have specific times to meet up & check in with each other.

 

I find if I call it 'checking in with each other' he takes it much better than 'I need to check up on you and what you're doing.' LOL!

[gracie65]

YIKES! This time next week we'll be @ sea!!!!! HOORAY.

 

But I digress. DS turned 12 in March. He is very levelheaded, very responsible, very trustworthy. Again, it's the OTHER folks I don't trust.

 

We will have walkie-talkies which, hopefully will work (most of the time). As soon as he finds some 'buddies' to hang with, I will relax the rules somewhat if he stays 'with the group' as they mostly tend to do. Until then, we will have specific times to meet up & check in with each other.

 

I find if I call it 'checking in with each other' he takes it much better than 'I need to check up on you and what you're doing.' LOL!

 

DH & I had a date night last night so as I'm reading your post I'm a little blurry eyed. I had to do a double take at your username this morning. I guess you can imagine what I thought it said at first!!!LOL Thought everyone may need a Hump Day laugh.

Hope you have a great cruise next week!!!!

[kayguz]

This was the first year we let any of kids sign in/out and sort of roam. It was either in pairs or group of 4. The oldest in each pair was 14 (or 2 months shy of it) and the youngest was 12. They had to tell us where they wanted to go and what they wanted to do. Then they had to report back to us at a certain time even though they had walkie-talkies. They really enjoyed the freedom of "go to the arcade for 20 minutes then go to the theater and save seats for us (the adults)." Or send them on a "pick up cookies or a drink for us" run-- they loved it. It was also nice as I allowed my oldest to be a signor for my 5 yr old and twin 9 yr olds (who were allowed to sign in/out for the scavenger hunt, but were told they were NOT allowed to sign out any other time. They had to wait for their sister or parent to get them.) We found that we crossed paths with them many times as well as they were always where they should be for "spot" checks. The only thing that scared me, and it was my fault for not being explicit, was one evening the girls (14 and 12) walked outside after dark enroute to meet us. My heart dropped and I realized I had neglected to explain to them that they were not to be outside after dark- ever (without us.) The four of them found it thrilling to just sit in the Promenade people watching without the parents right beside them.

My twins on the other hand-- well, 16 may still be too young for them to go without a parent or big sister attached! It all depends on the maturity of the child and the common sense that they may or may not have. Both my 14 and 12 yrs old have started babysitting for me and other people-- with parameters. So, in light of that, we felt that we should loosen up the overprotective reigns and give them a bit of wiggle room on the trip.

Sorry so long- sort of rambled there!:rolleyes:

[happybooker1]

I'm a librarian. It was a toss up between that one & 'novel lover' -- LOL!

 

DH & I had a date night last night so as I'm reading your post I'm a little blurry eyed. I had to do a double take at your username this morning. I guess you can imagine what I thought it said at first!!!LOL Thought everyone may need a Hump Day laugh.

Hope you have a great cruise next week!!!!