Double standards maybe

[Blazerboy]

Thanks for the "props." Seems there's always a thread like that every few months, but I'm impressed that the responses have been either pro-gay or neutral- very few "I'm not a bigot, but there are little children involved!" comments. Seems to reflect cruising in general- 99.9% don't have an issue, but there's always one, usually the one that we'd all be happy to avoid in the first place!:D

 

 

Andrew

[bdjam]

I equal feel sorry for self loathing and internalised homophobia which to my mind some seem to demonstrate here.

For those of us who are gay men here I think that our efforts would be much better directed at not seeing the worst in others, appreciating humor, being consistent, overcoming the false moral indignation and getting on with life.

Turtle – HUSBAND!! :D

But the straight community in general has not delegated itself a specific time/location standard for public sex cruisin' in such an overt way as the well-known 4pm gay steam-room. There is, for example, no "discreet straight sex in the library at 9pm" motto. And there is no "6am straight sex everyday in the top-deck jacuzzi." Yes those things may occur from time to time with different people, but the straight community has not planted its flag in the earth, and proclaimed itself a right to a specific spot and time for debauchery every day aboard a ship.

So we have to catch flack because we’re organized? Can’t we get even one break?

There is a modicum of overt egotism in the existence of the "4pm gay steamroom" that does not exist in the straight community. And on behalf of myself, my husband, my friends, and my children, I am embarassed and mortified by this type of organized hedonism. The "4pm steam room" standard is basically giving the finger to society.

 

Having something fun and sexual happen in public areas is different from a community of people organizing their at-sea days around a scheduled debauchery event. Totally different.

I would really like to know how “community of people organizing” is defined here. I’m sorry, I realize these boards are popular and all, but anyone here who has posted advocacy for anything like what is described in this quote is certainly a small percentage – of gay posters on this board, of posters on this board and of people cruising. This makes it sound like there’s a battle going on and those of us in rainbow steam room towels have taken up arms.

The gay community owns part of the blame for double standards. Not the largest part, but a small part at least. The double standard will never go away or weaken if we continue to do things that play into the hands of those that would hold us down, demean us, imprison us, or worse.

Sorry, Bob – I totally disagree with you. There will be no broadening of any horizons if we as gay people become homogenized with the rest of society. No one will ever learn to accept or understand any minority group if that group crawls under a rock. Where do you draw the line about things that will play into the hands of those who will hold us down? Kissing in public? Holding hands in public? Looking at each other in public? Talking to each other in public? All that is needed is one psychopathic leader and soon there will be written language in federal documents forbidding our community from coming together at all – wait, isn’t that happening?

In any case, it is totally disrespectful to those who have come before us and who have helped us to earn the rights that we have today to follow your logic. Remember those first rebels at Stonewall were all drag queens, and they were totally disrespected – you think they helped our cause? Darn right they did.

Finally, to keep this somewhat under the topic of cruising, I have found some of the most accepting and brilliant people are those who I’ve met on cruise ships – none in steam rooms, by the way – and who are from different cultures. Their open minds and welcoming nature prove that there’s something wrong with the way some people in the United States think.