***Welcome To The New Cruise Countdown Club***

[mstrc1]

Sharon, I just cannot believe how these kids are treating you. This whole situation sounds real tense. In one hand I can understand why you would want to withdraw to stay away from all of the crap. Step back and let your lawyer handle all of the crap. I would not let them push you away or let them take anything from you either. Having them keep you away from the farm. It is totally crazy how money affects people. Bill would not approve their actions at all.

 

We went to the fish fry yesterday. They also serve turkey and turkey breasts and also pasta and salads. All for $20 pp, all you can eat, and yes, I do not eat fish.

 

It has been very cool at night. But there is no rain in the forecast for the rest of this week, and temps warming into the 80's later on this week.

 

I'll pray for you and that those kids leave you alone and stop treating you the way they are. This behavior is very sad.

 

 

Kathy

[timeormoney]

Well like I say the son keeps saying "we want everyone to be happy" but changing the locks and acting like they are the only trust worthy ones is certainly not going to make anyone happy. Yes I am very mad really that they told me not to go there, I think I just might say something to them about it next Saturday when they want me to help them again. Obviously they don't like me anyway so what harm can there be to speak up.

 

I got up and went to the early service at church today, I usually go to the second one. I went to the early one because I don't know many people that go to that service and I didn't want everyone telling me how sorry they were and me crying. It worked, didn't know a soul.

 

People across the road had an auction today, they had a barn that was full of all kinds of stuff. They have had it for years so I don't know what they plan on doing now, moving or just not having the sale barn any loner. Lots of cars parked all over the road but left my driveway open.

 

Just been playing a computer game all afternoon, not much interested in doing anything today.

[mstrc1]

Sharon, you are right about what you are saying and feeling. But I would turn this over to your lawyer to handle them. There is no use in getting yourself all upset when saying anything to them. They do not care about you and only want to use you. So I would not help them at all, as they will only turn around and stab you in the back.

 

It will be warming up this week and temps will go into the 80's, and no rain in the forecast for this week. Our bocce banquet is next Wednesday. So this is it for us. We are not doing this anymore and will drop out of the club next June. The club has been sold, but it will be a few years before it is all complete.

 

I think that was a good move going to the earlier service to avoid talking to all of those people. Still just the same, remember to take good care of yourself and find the time to breath.

 

 

Kathy

[Oppalopa]

I am really sorry you are going thru all this. Maybe things will get better after the will is read.

[timeormoney]

No things will not get better for a long time, the will says to follow the trust. Since I resigned as one of the Trustee's these two are in charge. This will go on for a least 3 to 5 years as directed by the trust. In retrospect I should not have resigned as Trustee but had my lawyer deal with the Trusts lawyer.

 

These two have let the power go to their head and I think will eventually destroy the whole family.

 

On another subject, I did go out for lunch with my 3 friends from exercise. We went to Olive Garden and had a nice time. Then one of them mentioned the sale at Carson's (Boston Store in Janesville where we were). So we decided to go have a look. I mentioned to them about the friend I used to have, you remember Kathy, and how I hoped she wouldn't still be working there or that I would run into her. But sure enough as I was looking at a rack of clothes she came by and I had to talk with her. However, one of my friends was close and came right over to rescue me. She just said she was sorry about Bill and walked on, so that was fine.

 

You know I'm writing about how Bill's kids are and how my long ago friend was to me, I'm wondering is it just me or what? I do have other friends from dancing, exercise and church that seem to like me, so what is it? Guess I have too much time now to think about these things.

 

Unbeknownst to anyone I did take some of Bill's ashes out before I took them to his family cemetery and plan to take them and Tinkers up to the cemetery where my family is located today.

 

Kathy, you will miss the club, you do so many things over there. Don't you think you will want to continue to go, maybe things will even be better than they have been.

[mstrc1]

Sharon, in retrospect, yes you should have not resigned your trustee position. Bill would not have wanted you to do that, but he also would not have wanted all of this resentment going on either. It will for sure destroy the family as for some money does that to people. That is very sad.

 

We cannot justify paying those high cost just for the privilege to be a member. It is like $5,000 a year to be a member. Yes, you are right, that we have made a lot of friendships over the years, but we cannot justify paying those costs anymore.

 

Do not worry about those kids treating you the way they are. They are bottom feeders and they will get their just do some day. They have no right to treat you the way they are. Bill would be very upset knowing how they are treating you. Rest assured that you are a good person, and do not deserve to be treated the way you are.

 

 

Kathy

[timeormoney]

I have been thinking about that trust and the way those two are acting. I have decided to contact my lawyer tomorrow and ask him if since only the other beneficiaries were notified of my resignation and not the trust lawyer I can reinstate myself. I have to stop those teo, especially the daughter who will make a complete mess out of everthing. Don't know if its possible but have to try.

[Belle]

Glad you went out to lunch and got out some.

 

I'm glad you want to be trustee again. I hope

it works out. They will run the estate dry.

You better watch if their taking things..items

or money.

You need to be seeing what everyone is doing.

 

Take care and Good Luck!

[mstrc1]

Sharon, whatever you do it will put you in a real war against them. However it is what Bill would want you to do. You cannot let them get to you, and whatever happens, you have to remain calm. Have you signed anything, or was it just a verbal with drawl? Good luck and remain calm, let them be the one's to get upset.

 

Another day in the 80's and I think tomorrow and then the rain comes in on Friday, and much cooler temps for the weekend.

 

I hope your lawyer can do some good for you today.

 

 

Kathy

[timeormoney]

Found out today when I spoke with my lawyer's assistant, he had, unfortunately, already mailed out a letter yesterday to the Trust lawyer saying I was resigning. Should have thought of it sooner, even though we had talked about it, didn't know he was gong to mail it out without letting me know first. Maybe its for the best would have meant getting into the middle of the whole stinking mess. This way I can wash my hands of it and let them be responsible. When the other "kids" (all over 50) find out I'm sure there will be he** to pay. Just exactly what Bill did not want to happen.

 

Was supposed to go to the exercise class, Forever Fit today but just couldn't make myself get ready to go. Can't seem to get on an even keel and care about anything anymore.

[mstrc1]

Sharon, I know it is and will be difficult. But Belle gave the best advice to follow. Never feel that you cannot do anything or feel that you cannot do anything. You are the most important person and you must take the best care of you and do not worry about anyone else.

 

In hind sight, perhaps it is all for the best that you are not the trustee anymore. It only would have put you right in the middle and right on the firing line. You certainly do not need any of that kind of stress in your life. You are also right, that Bill would not wanted you to resign, but most definitely he would not have wanted all of this bad feelings either.

 

Another day in the 80's and then tonight much cooler temps for the weekend and a lot of rain coming as well.

 

Take good care of yourself,

 

 

Kathy

[timeormoney]

Made myself get out of the house, went up to Great clips and got a haircut. She did a terrible job but at least its shorter. I had started cutting here and there on it so I think its evened up now anyway.

 

Got an email from the "son" today, wants to meet with me tomorrow. Must be without the "daughter" because she doesn't usually get her until later in the day on Friday. Wondering what he wants. I told him I had between 12 and 2 pm open, but had an appointment I had to leave for then. I do too, I made an appmnt for a mammogram. Hoping that turns out ok. When I registered they said they saw I had a health care power of attorney with William listed, also said saw that I was married, I just said yes thats right. Couldn't get into telling them the changes too hard.

 

Terrible storms swept through here this afternoon and evening, lots of wind, rain and thunder. Luckily did not lose power. TV wouldn't work, couldn't find a signal it said. Was alright though because I have been reading. I have read an entire book each day for the last three days. Trying to keep my mind off of missing Bill.

[mstrc1]

Sharon, I hope the meeting with the son went well for you today. Let your lawyer do all of the talking for you once the time comes. You do not need all of that stress dealing with them.

 

We never got any of the rain that you got yesterday afternoon. We did not get the rain until very early this morning. Then, late this afternoon we got hit with real violent storms and tornado warnings. Tomorrow and all next week, temps only in the 70's.

 

Real bad day at work today. Take good care of your self.

 

 

Kathy

[timeormoney]

Good thing it was Friday so you can get the job out of your mind for a couple of days. That jerk never seems to remember anything that you have said to him about respecting you. Please tell me more about went on. I always seem to hog the "troubles" part.

 

The son came over and after talking with the Trust lawyer wanted Bill & my 2012, 2013 and 2014 tax returns. So I called my lawyer and he said in his 39 years of Trust administration he has never needed more than one year, but go ahead and give it to them. Also the son wanted to know what happened to his dads wedding ring when he was married to his mom. I had already given him Bill's wedding ring from our marriage, before I knew they were going to act like this, and his watch to another son. But anyway I told him he had it cut off and didn't save it, geesh what else are they going to ask for! My lawyer guesses he is trying to find assets to put in the Trust.

 

The "daughter" came over today and said how so so simple it was to do all the bookkeeping. She didn't need my help with anything, but was wondering about some insurance policies that her dad had. I told her I had went through them and already given them the ones that were life insurance, but she insisted she had looked through them a while back and there should be more. I gave her the box and told her I wanted it back because I am on some of them. All the other ones in the box are for hospital benefits, accident and disability and cancer. So she can knock herself out and look though them, obviously she didn't believe me. She also told me she had interviewed for a job pretty close and was planning to move into the farm, I told her that her dad did not want her living in the farm, she said she had asked him one time when she was visiting. I said I never heard that, she said I was talking to someone else at the time. But..and thank goodness, her sister said oh no you can't move in there that's not fair to anyone else. I know she lies so I am sure Bill never changed his mind, he might not have known what she said but he certainly was dead set against it.

 

Just one more day in my life, can't wait to see what comes next.

[Belle]

Your having so much trouble with his "children".

Their not adults their acting like "little children.

What greed does to some people.

 

If you have a lawyer and a trust then isn't everything

in writing what he wanted you to have and what he

wanted them to have?

How long were you married? Did they ever take to you?

Is this been ongoing? Sorry you have to go thru this.

[mstrc1]

Sharon, you have to be real careful with them. After 13 years of being married to Bill, you do have certain entitlements. I would not be giving them anything at all, as you have, as you will not be getting anything back from them. I would tell them to go to your lawyer for anything that they want or have questions with. Belle said everything right.

 

Also, you knew that was coming with that one daughter. She has been just doing whatever she pleases and also with her daughter. All of those other kids will have to keep a close eye on her, as I am she will just move in there even though her sister said no. She does not listen to anyone.

 

Do not ever give it a second thought on your situation, as you will never take up everything here on your end. Everything is perfectly all right. For Friday, for me, with the extreme bad weather, we had power outages, and phone and Internet down. Everything that could have gone wrong went wrong. The jerk did not cause anything, all was internal, and everyone comes to me as they are like children and cannot solve anything themselves. I was not feeling well and I did not take a lunch, and Bill gets all upset with me when I do that.

 

Enjoy and have a good Sunday today. There is no rain in the forecast for this entire week. I am real concerned with Bill as he is going in for surgery on Thursday. Whenever they put you asleep especially with his health issues, I always worry that he will not wake up. He is having his right elbow taken care of as he has a mussel that came detached from the bone. All is just outpatient. Then on October 14 he is going under again for a heal spur that they have to take care of as well.

 

 

Kathy

[timeormoney]

Belle the Trust was his and his first wife's, not mine and his. Also the Trust lawyer has never liked me and is trying to say everything I have or we had is half Bill's and should go into the Trust. He is under the mistaken belief that we lived in Wisconsin and it is a community property state. He does not know that we have lived in IL, me forever and Bill for the past 15 years, and it is not a community property state. We were married for almost 13 years and I'm thinking the "kids" never really liked me, just tolerated me for their dads sake. There is one nice one though and I like her. It has always been about the money. Bill also had wrote a note and stuck it in the Trust book that said he wanted the house paid off for me, but since it is not actually part of the Trust I do not think they will do it. Before Bill got sick none of them had ever come over to the house in all those years.

 

Kathy I'm glad it wasn't the boss this time, but all those other things can certainly add up and be very stressful. You should take your lunch time even if you don't eat, get a few minutes away from everything that is going on.

 

Hope your Bill's surgery goes well, yes it is always a worry when they put you to sleep but I'm sure they will monitor him very carefully to make sure all goes well. Hopefully it will heal up quickly and not be too painful at first either. Bill's on in law had that happen too and it took quite a while to heal completely.

 

I had a mammogram done on Friday, they said if I didn't hear anything by Tuesday all went well. I think they will probably call me to come back for an ultra sound because I know I have a couple of cists that were there last time and now have been very sore since they mashed me down like that.

 

I went and visited my sister today, couldn't stand to just stay in the quiet house again all day long. We went to lunch and then back to her house for a while and talked. She said her breast cancer is stage one but aggressive and they say the chemo is shrinking it, but it is very hard on her to take these chemo treatments. She has another one next week and then one more in 3 more weeks and that should be it before the lumpectomy.

[mstrc1]

Sharon, Bill would not have thought his kids were going to treat you the way they are. I am sure you have always known their feeling towards you. He should have put you in the trust. As it stands now, those kids are going to screw you around. But in IL since you have been married for more than 10 years, then the property should be divided evenly towards you. I am sure your lawyer will take care of that for you. It is really too bad that those kids are treating you this way.

 

I am glad to hear that you went to visit you sister. It is good that her family can be close to her to help her through this difficult time that she will be going through. I also hope that your own test results come back and that nothing is found, and you get an OK.

 

I am very concerned about the upcoming surgeries for Bill. Whenever they put you asleep, the concern is that you may not wake up. The recovery could be any where from 3 to 6 months.

 

We have been together playing bunco for over 40 years. As anyone and especially friends, after a while people get under you skin. Usually something very stupid. So after all of these years, we are now faced that our group could be splitting up. Two members have had a falling out and have left the group. So now we have to make up those 2 spots and if we cannot, then our group is finished. I have a game scheduled on Friday, so we shall see. It is not at my house, otherwise I would have to cancel.

 

 

Kathy

[timeormoney]

Kathy I am a beneficiary of the Trust also, I told Bill not to put me in but he wanted to. It will be divided into 8 parts. I went to the bank to change the address where our bank stmnts are mailed today since the daughter is not giving it to me and found out the son had been to the bank on Friday trying to get into the safe deposit box and the daughter had tried on Saturday, the bank manager told me, Her son was the only one Bill let hunt on his property.

. She said she told them both it was a joint account and was not in the Trust so they could not access it. She said the daughter got real huffy with her, I told her I wasn't surprised they would try that.

 

Went to exercise class again this morning and cut some grass this afternoon.The belt popped off the mower deck so I called a guy that fixed it before and he came right over and picked it up. He said he will call with an estimate before he fixes it.

 

Haven't heard about results of the test yet, guess no news is good news.

 

Don't worry about Bill having his surgery, as long as he is in a good hospital he will be just fine. They monitor you very carefully. He is lucky to have you to woorry about him though.

 

Too bad about the Bunco group, its amazing you stayed together as long as you did. Sometimes something is said or a look is made that just rubs someone the wrong way. Maybe they will get over it ot maybe someone new can help rejuvenate the group.Hope it works out for the others sake as well.

 

Watched Dancing With the Stars, as usual some good some not so good.

[mstrc1]

Sharon, we go to Northwestern Memorial for everything. All of our Dr's are there and all surgeries and tests are done there as well. He was down there yesterday and today having tests done before the surgery.

 

It is also too bad that those kids, if they had their way would leave you with nothing if they could get away with it. A god example was going and trying to get into you safe deposit box without even talking to you. So a very good example of what to expect down the line. Also that lawyer, sounds like he could be in with the rest of them. If Bill wanted the house to be paid off, then that is what should happen, with no if's and's or no but's.

 

With the fall new line-up, and when I saw the new season with BWTS, I figured that you would be watching. I have a bunch as well and record some of them when I will not be around. We have our end of season bocce banquet tomorrow night. Bill runs that. We will have 95 people at the banquet. This is the largest league in the club. As far as the bunco you are right about those things. I guess we will have to see what happens on Friday night. That is barring all going well for Bill.

 

I hope you are right about you test results.

 

 

Kathy

[timeormoney]

When is his surgery, Thursday? I will keep him and you in my prayers. In the meantime have fun at the banquet. This might be the last one if you don't join for another yeat.

 

I put the son on the see pot today, text him and said, you are going to honor your dads wishes snd pay off the mortgage aren't you? So far no response from him. Probably trying to figure out how not to have to pay.

 

Still haven't got any results from my test, again taking that as good news. My sister saw her cancer dr today, he said after the lumpectomy she will need 3 weeks of daily radiation. Seens like over kill if the lymp nodes turn out to be clear.

 

My pet sitter texted a picture of a black cocker spaniel 5 years old that needs a home. I told her no not ready for a dog, then she sent me an invitation to a barn dance they are having in October. Not sure I will go but will see how I feel then.

[Belle]

Kathy will be thinking of your husband on

Thursday. Sure everything will be fine.

Know your worried but will be praying with you.

 

I play Bunco too. Don't quit the group. You can play

with less than 12. Just write "dummy" on a couple of

score cards and keep playing. Just keep playing

with them, when a person has dummy card just rolls

for both. Works out fine. You don't have any sub's

you can call? Just look for two new people, don't

let the two women ruin it for the rest of you.

 

Sharon keep fighting for what's yours. You were

married 13 years. He planned to take care of you

forever. Trouble for some of us forever comes to soon.

Hope his kids grow up and do what their father wanted for you.

[mstrc1]

Sharon, yes the surgery is set for tomorrow. They will call him sometime this afternoon to let us know what time to be there. We do know that it will be in the morning and will have to wait for the exact time. You are right, that we will not be joining back next year at the end of June. We have been putting way too much money into that place.

 

Well that sounds like the step in the right direction with that son. But I would not hold your breath on this one, as I am sure he is trying to figure out a way to screw you out of that. But you really did put it to him in a very good way, as that is what his Dad wanted to happen.

 

So lets hope that not hearing anything is good news. Also once again, it is good that your sister will have her family close by to help her out.

 

Another nice day. Bill will be busy today getting everything done that he will not be able to do after today do it only having the use of 1 arm. He does a lot around the house, and now anything else, I will have to take over until he is recovered.

 

 

Kathy

[mstrc1]

Kathy will be thinking of your husband on

Thursday. Sure everything will be fine.

Know your worried but will be praying with you.

 

I play Bunco too. Don't quit the group. You can play

with less than 12. Just write "dummy" on a couple of

score cards and keep playing. Just keep playing

with them, when a person has dummy card just rolls

for both. Works out fine. You don't have any sub's

you can call? Just look for two new people, don't

let the two women ruin it for the rest of you.

 

Sharon keep fighting for what's yours. You were

married 13 years. He planned to take care of you

forever. Trouble for some of us forever comes to soon.

Hope his kids grow up and do what their father wanted for you.

 

Thank you for the kind words for my Bill tomorrow.

 

I was not planning to drop out, it really depends on the rest of them. So it is up to the person that is hosting to get subs. So we have or had a total of 8. We take turns in going to a different person's house to host every month. So it ends up that we only have to host once per year as there are some months like around the holidays that we just go out for lunch and shopping.

 

But think you for that suggestion. I never thought of it, and I will bring that up to the rest of them on Friday. But also another good point, that perhaps we will find two new, to add a breath of fresh air into our group.

 

 

Kathy

[timeormoney]

Thanks Belle, I'm trying to do the best I can to keep what Bill wanted for me. It certainly would help to have to have the house paid off! Nice to have you join us.

 

Kathy I know everything will go just fine tomorrow, it's out patient surgery isn't it? You get to be the nurse for a while. Hope he gets some meds so he can sleep at night. Seems everything is worse at night.

 

Took the garbage over to the farm (there is a dumpster for the renters we always used). Was a little worried to run into the son that has his business there, but stopped in and talked to him. He was fine, even said when I told him my mower broke, that he would come over and take a look at it. But I told him I had already called someone and had it picked up. He said too, whats going on? I said I didn't know anything. Nice to know, at least for now we seem to be good.

 

Still no test results, will call tomorrow, its been long enough. I should have heard by now.

 

Again let me know when you get back from the hospital how everything went.