Awkward Solo Moments

[artist47]

You should write a book

Dinner tables can make or break a cruise

 

Thanks for sharing

Greg:)

 

 

 

 

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You are the third person this week to tell me that (write a book.)

Perhaps one day, I will....

 

You're right about the dinner arrangements. A few pages back, I told my horror story of being so mortified by someone who did not want a "single" at "her" table. It was awful.

 

These days, I just have given up --- if I am seated at a table with uncouth people, I don't hesitate to get up and leave, even in the middle of a meal.

 

On one my last cruises, I was seated with a family of 6 on an 8 top. They were from Oklahoma. Now, I'm sure people from Oklahoma are NOT at all like this family, but it was really awful.

 

The other solo was a very nice gay man named Barry, from England. He and I got on well. But on that first night, this family we were seated with suddenly started discussing WW2 and the ****'s. Barry and I could not really figure out later, how that subject even got started, but when the elder son of the family suddenly said, "Well, who's to say the ****'s were wrong?" (sorry for this edit...apparently CC edits out the name for the prevailing German political party of WW2...probably for good reasons. But the word is na zi.)

 

:eek:

 

Barry and I looked at each other, and not a word passed between us, but immediately he and I were both on the same "wavelength". We both rose from our seats, we turned to the family and we both said at the same time "You are abominable"/"Please tell me you are not that evil?".

 

(his statement was the former, mine was the latter.)

 

We both went straight to the maitre'd and got a new table that very night. Our plates were replaced with fresh entrees and we got a bottle of wine from the maitre'd. Who was from Italy and whose family had suffered greatly during WW2. ;)

 

 

I have to be honest, and say that as I have gotten older, I'm now 47, although I won't hesitate to move, I am also more anxious because of past experiences. I am honest enough to admit that these unpleasant things, though they have turned out for the better (as in the case with my acquaintance Barry, who was delightful) I am not looking forward to the dinner arrangements on the NCL Star on 3/16. I am dreading it a bit. (Packing list: Xanax...check! LOL)

 

If the first night is anything like the unpleasant experiences I have had in the past, I may very well have to suffer through it. NCL's Freestyle does offer choices in dining arrangements, but I just can't bear to think about going through that again. This upcoming cruise date has a lot of singles booked as a group, so I am hoping to be able to be seated with some of them.

 

I can't take another ill-educated family from anywhere.

 

:(

Edited February 25, 2014 by artist47

[dancinman66]

You are the third person this week to tell me that (write a book.)

Perhaps one day, I will....

 

You're right about the dinner arrangements. A few pages back, I told my horror story of being so mortified by someone who did not want a "single" at "her" table. It was awful.

 

These days, I just have given up --- if I am seated at a table with uncouth people, I don't hesitate to get up and leave, even in the middle of a meal.

 

On one my last cruises, I was seated with a family of 6 on an 8 top. They were from Oklahoma. Now, I'm sure people from Oklahoma are NOT at all like this family, but it was really awful.

 

The other solo was a very nice gay man named Barry, from England. He and I got on well. But on that first night, this family we were seated with suddenly started discussing WW2 and the ****'s. Barry and I could not really figure out later, how that subject even got started, but when the elder son of the family suddenly said, "Well, who's to say the ****'s were wrong?" (sorry for this edit...apparently CC edits out the synonym for the prevailing German political party of WW2.)

 

:eek:

 

Barry and I looked at each other, and not a word passed between us, but immediately he and I were both on the same "wavelength". We both rose from our seats, we turned to the family and we both said at the same time "You are abominable"/"Please tell me you are not that evil?".

 

(his statement was the former, mine was the latter.)

 

We both went straight to the maitre'd and got a new table that very night. Our plates were replaced with fresh entrees and we got a bottle of wine from the maitre'd. Who was from Italy and whose family had suffered greatly during WW2. ;)

 

 

I have to be honest, and say that as I have gotten older, I'm now 47, although I won't hesitate to move, I am also more anxious because of past experiences. I am honest enough to admit that these unpleasant things, though they have turned out for the better (as in the case with my acquaintance Barry, who was delightful) I am not looking forward to the dinner arrangements on the NCL Star on 3/16. I am dreading it a bit. (Packing list: Xanax...check! LOL)

 

If the first night is anything like the unpleasant experiences I have had in the past, I may very well have to suffer through it. NCL's Freestyle does offer choices in dining arrangements, but I just can't bear to think about going through that again. This upcoming cruise date has a lot of singles booked as a group, so I am hoping to be able to be seated with some of them.

 

I can't take another ill-educated family from anywhere.

 

:(

 

 

I know where your coming from and even last cruise and the one before just got up and left asking for another table

 

You do end up just giving in sometimes, but then the last cruise I ended with the liveliest people on the replacement table

 

As long as there are alternative dining venues I am good

 

Take it easy and happy cruising

 

Interesting if you were older like 60 you have less of an issue being single as people assume you are widowed or maybe divorced but acceptable to be single

But at 47 like you and me, it appears to be unacceptable

 

Oh well, who am I to fit into norms

:)

Greg

 

 

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[Thoth]

I know also what you mean as I have lots who know me also. It is usually table mates and just ransoms with their thoughts

 

Plus the dancing makes you stand out more

 

The one thing dancing taught me is to not worry what others think

 

Enjoy cruising

Cheers

Greg

 

 

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Correct you are Greg. It is not about what others think, but what we think of ourselves. :)

[Thoth]

I'll keep that in mind - play every game possible!

The same people tend to attend trivia each time and it is an easy place to make friends. Same with karaoke....basically the same ones each evening. With 3000 people on a ship, I need to cull things down into smaller groups. :D

[dancinman66]

Correct you are Greg. It is not about what others think, but what we think of ourselves. :)

 

 

Took me many years to work that one out

 

Add to that - living in a way according to my own morals, standing and behavioral mannerisms then I am happy

 

Ie. I try not to be offensive, but I don't run my life around an impossibility of life

 

Smile when all else around is dim and everyone will wonder what you are up to:)

Greg

 

 

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[Thoth]

Here's another game I have played:

 

When people keep remarking how "sad" they are for me that I am alone, I start making up stories about why. Here's my personal favorite and I give all the ladies permission to use it as you see fit. :p

 

"Well, you see it all started in Rome. I had wanted to join a convent there but they wouldn't take me because well....I was divorced and had a love-child by one of the local politicians there. I can't tell you who, because then my life would be in danger. So, I had to go to Russia for awhile, and I met a man there who was very wealthy. But he too was a bit dangerous and so I left in the middle of the night, and ended up on a flight to Malta. The only affordable way off the island was by ship, and I've been cruising ever since, trying to avoid the father of my child. It's been 20 years and I know he is still looking for me. I was offered the Witness Protection Program (because of what I know about his "associates") but it would have required me to live in Peoria. I felt that my safety was better assured by just continuing to cruise, so here I am."

 

:D

excellent comeback ! That will end the stupid questions. Sounds like the things I would love to say.

[Thoth]

You are the third person this week to tell me that (write a book.)

Perhaps one day, I will....

 

You're right about the dinner arrangements. A few pages back, I told my horror story of being so mortified by someone who did not want a "single" at "her" table. It was awful.

 

These days, I just have given up --- if I am seated at a table with uncouth people, I don't hesitate to get up and leave, even in the middle of a meal.

 

On one my last cruises, I was seated with a family of 6 on an 8 top. They were from Oklahoma. Now, I'm sure people from Oklahoma are NOT at all like this family, but it was really awful.

 

The other solo was a very nice gay man named Barry, from England. He and I got on well. But on that first night, this family we were seated with suddenly started discussing WW2 and the ****'s. Barry and I could not really figure out later, how that subject even got started, but when the elder son of the family suddenly said, "Well, who's to say the ****'s were wrong?" (sorry for this edit...apparently CC edits out the name for the prevailing German political party of WW2...probably for good reasons. But the word is na zi.)

 

:eek:

 

Barry and I looked at each other, and not a word passed between us, but immediately he and I were both on the same "wavelength". We both rose from our seats, we turned to the family and we both said at the same time "You are abominable"/"Please tell me you are not that evil?".

 

(his statement was the former, mine was the latter.)

 

We both went straight to the maitre'd and got a new table that very night. Our plates were replaced with fresh entrees and we got a bottle of wine from the maitre'd. Who was from Italy and whose family had suffered greatly during WW2. ;)

 

 

I have to be honest, and say that as I have gotten older, I'm now 47, although I won't hesitate to move, I am also more anxious because of past experiences. I am honest enough to admit that these unpleasant things, though they have turned out for the better (as in the case with my acquaintance Barry, who was delightful) I am not looking forward to the dinner arrangements on the NCL Star on 3/16. I am dreading it a bit. (Packing list: Xanax...check! LOL)

 

If the first night is anything like the unpleasant experiences I have had in the past, I may very well have to suffer through it. NCL's Freestyle does offer choices in dining arrangements, but I just can't bear to think about going through that again. This upcoming cruise date has a lot of singles booked as a group, so I am hoping to be able to be seated with some of them.

 

I can't take another ill-educated family from anywhere.

 

:(

That just reiterates the "no politics on a cruise" rule ;) There a few things more boorish than than taking one's political debate on vacation. Let's talk FUN :D

[laedw]

The same people tend to attend trivia each time and it is an easy place to make friends. Same with karaoke....basically the same ones each evening. With 3000 people on a ship, I need to cull things down into smaller groups. :D

 

No Karaoke:D I don't want to be known on the ship as the one that murdered a hit song!!! LOL

[dancinman66]

No Karaoke:D I don't want to be known on the ship as the one that murdered a hit song!!! LOL

 

 

Can't do that as that is my name:)

 

 

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[Thoth]

No Karaoke:D I don't want to be known on the ship as the one that murdered a hit song!!! LOL

At least one would be remembered :D Maybe that is why karaoke works for me? ??? :eek:

[Thoth]

Took me many years to work that one out

 

Add to that - living in a way according to my own morals, standing and behavioral mannerisms then I am happy

 

Ie. I try not to be offensive, but I don't run my life around an impossibility of life

 

Smile when all else around is dim and everyone will wonder what you are up to:)

Greg

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

I cannot agree with you more there Greg !

I learned self love in the US military where there were no family and close friends to build me up every day. Those unable to think for themselves don't earn my respect.

I never intend to offend anyone, but it inadvertently happens. There are those who are always seeking an apology from others...that's a weakness. Yes people from time to time will say something that I dislike so I attempt to counter with facts.

" Smile when all else around is dim and everyone will wonder what you are up to " = initiate the sense of humor. ;) Yep !

[dancinman66]

I cannot agree with you more there Greg !

 

I learned self love in the US military where there were no family and close friends to build me up every day. Those unable to think for themselves don't earn my respect.

 

I never intend to offend anyone, but it inadvertently happens. There are those who are always seeking an apology from others...that's a weakness. Yes people from time to time will say something that I dislike so I attempt to counter with facts.

 

" Smile when all else around is dim and everyone will wonder what you are up to " = initiate the sense of humor. ;) Yep !

 

 

Touché

:)

 

 

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[charmed101]

OK, here is my two cents on this. I do have a partner now and we enjoy cruising very much, but, I would not hesitate to travel/cruise alone. I consider it a treat to myself for all the ups and downs that life seems to throw in our paths. Also, I think I work hard for my money so I'm not going to let anyone spoil or take away from me having a great cruise! its just not worth it. Another way to look at it is this,,, you may be thinking that all the couples at your table is talking about you there single,,,, but consider how many of those people are wishing they were you,,, able to come and go as you please, do what you want and not answer to anyone,,, instead they are "stuck" with their partner either through finances or fear of the unknown and are mostly unhappy with their lives. So ! If you have a partner enjoy it,,,,, if your going solo, enjoy that too, life is too short ! :-)

[yellowbird23]

OK, here is my two cents on this. I do have a partner now and we enjoy cruising very much, but, I would not hesitate to travel/cruise alone. I consider it a treat to myself for all the ups and downs that life seems to throw in our paths. Also, I think I work hard for my money so I'm not going to let anyone spoil or take away from me having a great cruise! its just not worth it. Another way to look at it is this,,, you may be thinking that all the couples at your table is talking about you there single,,,, but consider how many of those people are wishing they were you,,, able to come and go as you please, do what you want and not answer to anyone,,, instead they are "stuck" with their partner either through finances or fear of the unknown and are mostly unhappy with their lives. So ! If you have a partner enjoy it,,,,, if your going solo, enjoy that too, life is too short ! :-)

 

I totally agree with you. On more than one occasion crossing paths with the "wishing people", I have seen them dickering back and forth and I just look them in the eye and say, "that's why I leave mine at home". You don't always have to be joined at the hip.

[Thoth]

OK, here is my two cents on this. I do have a partner now and we enjoy cruising very much, but, I would not hesitate to travel/cruise alone. I consider it a treat to myself for all the ups and downs that life seems to throw in our paths. Also, I think I work hard for my money so I'm not going to let anyone spoil or take away from me having a great cruise! its just not worth it. Another way to look at it is this,,, you may be thinking that all the couples at your table is talking about you there single,,,, but consider how many of those people are wishing they were you,,, able to come and go as you please, do what you want and not answer to anyone,,, instead they are "stuck" with their partner either through finances or fear of the unknown and are mostly unhappy with their lives. So ! If you have a partner enjoy it,,,,, if your going solo, enjoy that too, life is too short ! :-)

correct you are :)

[Thoth]

I totally agree with you. On more than one occasion crossing paths with the "wishing people", I have seen them dickering back and forth and I just look them in the eye and say, "that's why I leave mine at home". You don't always have to be joined at the hip.

I can't lie very well and keep a straight face, but just once I would like to tell everyone that I'm traveling with my lady but she was put into the ship's brig. :eek: Then after the next port proclaim..."she got kicked off ".

[42CruiseCrazy]

I can't lie very well and keep a straight face, but just once I would like to tell everyone that I'm traveling with my lady but she was put into the ship's brig. :eek: Then after the next port proclaim..."she got kicked off ".

 

 

You would need to explain why. What comes to mind is soliciting, but then that might not get her kicked off the ship. Maybe an invitation to cruise again..... for free! LOL

 

 

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[artist47]

I can't lie very well and keep a straight face, but just once I would like to tell everyone that I'm traveling with my lady but she was put into the ship's brig. :eek: Then after the next port proclaim..."she got kicked off ".

 

Do it. Please. I don't want to be the only one making up lies. LOL

[dancinman66]

I can't lie very well and keep a straight face, but just once I would like to tell everyone that I'm traveling with my lady but she was put into the ship's brig. :eek: Then after the next port proclaim..."she got kicked off ".

 

 

These answers and stories just keep getting better

 

 

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[laedw]

At least one would be remembered :D Maybe that is why karaoke works for me? ??? :eek:

 

 

Never thought of that - I may just give it a try!:D

[dancinman66]

Never thought of that - I may just give it a try!:D

 

 

Now I know why babies start crying when I walk into a room :D

 

 

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[Thoth]

You would need to explain why. What comes to mind is soliciting, but then that might not get her kicked off the ship. Maybe an invitation to cruise again..... for free! LOL

 

 

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When they ask why did your lady get kicked off the ship? < I could say ..."I'm not at liberty to discuss it ...but..."

"you haven't adjusted that automatic gratuity have you ?" ~OR~

"The adult only deck has changed,you know that don't you ?..topless doesn't mean..." :eek:

~OR~ "you know that hallway on B deck with the do not enter sign ? "

~OR~ " The Lido buffet has very strict queuing up rules"

~OR~ " Same reason she ran off with that cook from Papua New Guinea"

Edited February 26, 2014 by Thoth

[dancinman66]

When they ask why did your lady get kicked off the ship? < I could say ..."I'm not at liberty to discuss it ...but..."

"you haven't adjusted that automatic gratuity have you ?" ~OR~

"The adult only deck has changed,you know that don't you ?..topless doesn't mean..." :eek:

~OR~ "you know that hallway on B deck with the do not enter sign ? "

~OR~ " The Lido buffet has very strict queuing up rules"

~OR~ " Same reason she ran off with that cook from Papua New Guinea"

 

 

Now that's funny

Greg:D lmao

 

 

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[Cruzin-K]

Hmmm....have you noticed that on the forms at doctors' offices, they ask for both your birth date and your age? There is a reason for this -- they are checking for your mental state. If you know your birth date but don't know how old you are, you may be experiencing early onset alzheimer's or other memory issues. It's a little test...

 

I actually have to think for a second when writing down my age because I don't feel 45 :D I know "age is just a number" but dang, aren't you supposed to be all over the hill and "middle aged" at 45, not gallivanting about the globe solo :D

 

I've had a few awkward solo moments on cruises, usually finding myself unsure of how to respond to someone who calls me "brave" :confused:

 

However, the most awkward moment that comes to mind though was a land vacation to Australia. I spent two and a half weeks traveling by myself. It was truly the trip of a lifetime. I was so excited to find a really great deal on a room at the Hotel Windsor in Melbourne, a fancy schmancy 5-star old hotel complete with a doorman in a top hat. I'd recommend this hotel to anyone, BUT, the doorman seemed so concerned that I was by myself and inquired about my relationship/parental status. When I responded that I'd never been married or had children, but enjoyed seeing the world by myself, he said something along the lines of "well you're young, there's still plenty of time". I was 42 at the time and had already decided that kids would not be part of my life after the age of 40. He made comments about my solo status a few times, and I never really figured out how to respond.

 

It really bothers me when people make comments like "you still have time" and "plenty of women have kids well into their 40's". Well, good for them :mad: Having babies at my age (now almost 46) is ridiculous for me. I'm not knocking others who do it (a college friend just had her first child at 45), but it is NOT for me at this point and yes, it is a big disappointment that things never worked out when I was younger but it just got to a point that it was no longer an option. Life goes on.

 

I guess the people who bother me the most are the married couples with kids/grandkids who think that if you're not married with a bunch of kids/grandkids that you are somehow a lesser human being. I was actually told something along those lines by a co-worker once :rolleyes: Thankfully, he was moved out of my group and I no longer have to speak to him at the office.

[42CruiseCrazy]

You could respond when asked "Do you have kids?" "Just me. I baby myself."

To which I say "Good for you". Be proud not ashamed of your lifestyle choice.

 

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Edited February 27, 2014 by 42CruiseCrazy