Has anyone been "kicked out" of their dining table?

[patches05]

The OP's story sounds like an awful experience! It's not something anyone should have to go through.

 

My DH and I had an odd dining experience on our honeymoon last month. We were on a European cruise on the Golden Princess and when we booked the trip with our TA we arranged for a table for 2. We were assured that this was confirmed and taken care of.

 

When we arrived at the dining room on the 1st night (traditional dining room) we were shown to a table for 6 with a very nice view of the water. We were the first people there. At first, I wanted to say something to try to get reassigned to a table for 2, but decided to go with the flow and see what happened.

 

Another couple, also on their honeymoon, was seated at the table. The remaining 2 seats were never filled. We were all about the same age, recently married, had very similar jobs and life experiences. We were at dinner over 2 hours talking and having a very pleasant time. As we left we both said things like, "have a good night, see you tomorrow" etc.

 

Well, to make a long story short, we never saw this couple again. They never came back to the table, but must have never said anything to the servers or the head waiter. Our servers had no clue that they weren't coming back. Then, a few days into the cruise, the head waiter came to the table to ask what our cabin number was so they they could track who wasn't there.

 

Well, we ended up with our "table for 2" with a fabulous view for the entire cruise. :)

[karfest]

On our first cruise we were seated at a table with 6 others. I believe it was a party of four and another couple. We had dinner the first night and thought everything went well. None of them ever ate at our table again for the rest of the cruise. My hubby and I sat at this table for 8 everynight. They offered to move us but we actually enjoyed the extra attention from our waiter (he felt sorry for us) and other cruisers who would say things like "eating with ALL your friends again?" We never did find out where the others went or why they abandoned us.

 

Now we will only cruise personal choice or freestyle so other cruisers aren't stuck with us for a whole week...;)

[Blazerboy]

Caviargal, I'm usually so in sync with your opinions about cruising that your last post surprised me. :(

 

Letting "strangers" at a table know that you've made other plans is merely good manners and the only civil thing to do. Yes, you don't owe an explanation about your specific preferences, i.e. WHY you prefer a table for two, or WHO your friends are that you've decided to join. But to leave without a word is rude. Telling a white lie is fine, even polite: "We ran into old friends and they asked us to join them, have a nice cruise, and I'm sure we'll see you around" or "we were waitlisted for a table for two, and the Maitre d' was so nice to accommodate us, enjoy your cruise." If you are uncomfortable with lying, a simple "just wanted to let you know that we've made other plans for dining, and hope you enjoy the rest of your cruise" should cover it.

 

 

 

We've had people leave our table before, and one does wonder about it. Even if the white lie is transparent, it allows everyone to continue to enjoy their cruise. One time, we had a family of five with a small child (70's, 30's and a five y.o., an elderly single lady (80's), my (same sex) partner and me.(30's) The last two at the table were a couple from CT(not that that matters:D ), probably in their 50's, and they left, but gave the most charming and gracious excuse so that the family didn't feel that it was because of the child, the elderly lady didn't feel it was because she was so much older, and my partner and I didn't feel it was because of us. Who knows what the real reason was? We actually discussed it at the table (the rest of us and the new couple got along really well!) and decided we'd all learned something: That a little effort on your part to be charming and gracious makes others feel better. And what's the argument against (and what's so hard about) that?

 

 

 

The "I'm on vacation, I paid for it, so why should I have to say anything" is the same argument that the people who don't want to follow the dress code make. Given the state of the World today, we should encourage more civility, not less! :)

[woodz]

We had 8 of us in our party. My children and in-laws. When we showed up to our assigned table for 8 there were 3 people sitting at it (a mom and two girls). She had already had a few pre-dinner drinks and had already started on the bread. She was very loud when she said she wasn't moving, we were wrong, go find somewhere else to sit..... The waiter came over and told us we would need to sit somewhere else. We explained that the women would be sitting with a 14 and 16 year old, two 70 year olds and one of us. He asked to see our cards told us the table had been booked twice. We were unhappy, but what could we do. The waiter finally brought over the Head Waiter and he asked the drunk lady to see her cruise card. She yelled at him and told him she wasn't stupid and she knew she was sitting in her assigned seat. Once again we explained the situation. The drunk lady got louder and louder (we weren't all that upset or embarassed, because no one was looking at us - she had the floor). Finally she dug out her card and suprise!! she was sitting at the wrong table. During the week she would come by our table and say a quick hi, but we mostly felt sorry for her and for her teenagers.

[caviargal]

Caviargal, I'm usually so in sync with your opinions about cruising that your last post surprised me. :(

 

Letting "strangers" at a table know that you've made other plans is merely good manners and the only civil thing to do. Yes, you don't owe an explanation about your specific preferences, i.e. WHY you prefer a table for two, or WHO your friends are that you've decided to join. But to leave without a word is rude. Telling a white lie is fine, even polite: "We ran into old friends and they asked us to join them, have a nice cruise, and I'm sure we'll see you around" or "we were waitlisted for a table for two, and the Maitre d' was so nice to accommodate us, enjoy your cruise." If you are uncomfortable with lying, a simple "just wanted to let you know that we've made other plans for dining, and hope you enjoy the rest of your cruise" should cover it.

 

 

There are several incidents that stand out in my experience on this topic.

 

Once, my friend and I were seated at a table with two latin Honeymoon couples. They did not speak - or chose not to speak - English. We got up and left soon after we sat down and I did not see a need to say anything as our presence was not even acknowledged.

 

Another incident occured when we - two single women - were sat at a table with a large family who were also speaking only Spanish. They did not acknowledge us when we sat down and we did not say anything when we left.

 

Another cruise we were seated in the smoking section (I am dating myself). When we got up to leave, we did mention that we had requested non smoking and did not want to be around cigarette smoke. We were polite and left.

 

So, I agree that in some situations, an explanation is polite. In the first two I mention above, I did not feel a need to offer any explanation.

 

We've had people leave our table before, and one does wonder about it. Even if the white lie is transparent, it allows everyone to continue to enjoy their cruise. One time, we had a family of five with a small child (70's, 30's and a five y.o., an elderly single lady (80's), my (same sex) partner and me.(30's) The last two at the table were a couple from CT(not that that matters:D ), probably in their 50's, and they left, but gave the most charming and gracious excuse so that the family didn't feel that it was because of the child, the elderly lady didn't feel it was because she was so much older, and my partner and I didn't feel it was because of us. Who knows what the real reason was? We actually discussed it at the table (the rest of us and the new couple got along really well!) and decided we'd all learned something: That a little effort on your part to be charming and gracious makes others feel better. And what's the argument against (and what's so hard about) that?

 

 

 

The "I'm on vacation, I paid for it, so why should I have to say anything" is the same argument that the people who don't want to follow the dress code make. Given the state of the World today, we should encourage more civility, not less! :)

 

 

 

There are several incidents that stand out in my experience on this topic.

 

Once, my friend and I were seated at a table with two latin Honeymoon couples. They did not speak - or chose not to speak - English. We got up and left soon after we sat down and I did not see a need to say anything as our presence was not even acknowledged.

 

Another incident occured when we - two single women - were sat at a table with a large family who were also speaking only Spanish. They did not acknowledge us when we sat down and we did not say anything when we left.

 

Another cruise we were seated in the smoking section (I am dating myself). When we got up to leave, we did mention that we had requested non smoking and did not want to be around cigarette smoke. We were polite and left.

 

So, I agree that in some situations, an explanation is polite. In the first two I mention above, I did not feel a need to offer any explanation.

[NCmom]

On our Alaskan cruise, RCCl did double book seats at our table. We were part of a large group travelling together with our travel agent. OUr table seated 10. The first night, no one was aware of the problem, because, due to jet lag, several people slept thru dinner. The second night, wasn't an issue because it was formal night, and the other family at the table with us decided not to dress up. I thought it was odd that there were other people at the table that night, but we were sort of swapping around. Then on the third night, 14 showed up for a table for 10. Our travel agent was the one who took us to one side and asked if we would be willing to move to another table. It worked out OK, except they then put the 3 of us with 4 other people at a table for 6 (thank goodness, DD decided to eat at the Windjammer most nights, so we would go with her to dinner then take her to the kids club, then go to our less crowded table.) Could have been handled better, but at least we weren't booted off my the boors at the table.

[Boo Boo]

I am very sorry for the OP (and everyone else who has had to put up with selfish behaviour from other cruisers) - people should not behave like that.

 

I wonder if some of these problems are caused by people getting used to "freedom dining" type programmes with cruise lines like Princess and NCL? It is certainly no excuse, but I wonder if people get used to sitting where they want, when they want, with whom they want?

 

I wont knock freedom dining - personally I prefer it. But traditional dining has things going for it too (better service generally...).

 

Nothing excuses rude bahaviour and any "sticky situations" should be handled with the utmost sensitivity by dinign room staff.

 

Boo

[lkb125]

Caviargal, I'm usually so in sync with your opinions about cruising that your last post surprised me. :(

 

Letting "strangers" at a table know that you've made other plans is merely good manners and the only civil thing to do. Yes, you don't owe an explanation about your specific preferences, i.e. WHY you prefer a table for two, or WHO your friends are that you've decided to join. But to leave without a word is rude. Telling a white lie is fine, even polite: "We ran into old friends and they asked us to join them, have a nice cruise, and I'm sure we'll see you around" or "we were waitlisted for a table for two, and the Maitre d' was so nice to accommodate us, enjoy your cruise." If you are uncomfortable with lying, a simple "just wanted to let you know that we've made other plans for dining, and hope you enjoy the rest of your cruise" should cover it.

 

 

 

We've had people leave our table before, and one does wonder about it. Even if the white lie is transparent, it allows everyone to continue to enjoy their cruise. One time, we had a family of five with a small child (70's, 30's and a five y.o., an elderly single lady (80's), my (same sex) partner and me.(30's) The last two at the table were a couple from CT(not that that matters:D ), probably in their 50's, and they left, but gave the most charming and gracious excuse so that the family didn't feel that it was because of the child, the elderly lady didn't feel it was because she was so much older, and my partner and I didn't feel it was because of us. Who knows what the real reason was? We actually discussed it at the table (the rest of us and the new couple got along really well!) and decided we'd all learned something: That a little effort on your part to be charming and gracious makes others feel better. And what's the argument against (and what's so hard about) that?

 

 

 

The "I'm on vacation, I paid for it, so why should I have to say anything" is the same argument that the people who don't want to follow the dress code make. Given the state of the World today, we should encourage more civility, not less! :)

I do agree with you about civility and good manners but I just wonder where people get the notion that they can ask to have people removed from their table and why would such a request be honored? We were on the Celebrity Mille last fall and a lovely couple ended up at our table for 8 they had been asked to leave their previous table they were so hurt and they did not want to discuss it. I can't imagine people being so cruel. Lorelle

[Schplinky]

I think the only things that could get you removed from a table are sex, plolitics and religion. While I think that intelligent adults should be able to discuss religion or politics, even if they disagree, I draw the line at people having sex at the table. That's just me.

 

Kidding aside, I do think that some people confuse their opinions on religion, politics or sexual politics with who they are as people and feel the need to bluntly state their beliefs when they are neither relevant nor welcomed. At a wedding, banquet or cruise dining room, I think folks should be trying to find neutral things to discuss in order to keep the conversation light. Things that spring to mind are the day's excursions, plans for the rest of the evening and the weather. While this may lead to superficial gab, it surely should avoid hurt feelings and ejections from tables.

[piercetc4]

i have only read the 1st page of these posts on this thread- plan to read all later- but did want to say this can happen on other cruise lines as well- i use to be a flight attendant-- heard complaints of all kinds and threats to fly another airline - had friends that worked for 2-3 other airlines -- all the things the complaints were regarding happened on all the airlines , not just the one i worked for-- not defending this cruiseline.............just saying that stuff happens and it happens on them all at one time or another- best thing to do is to get the lemons and make some lemonade- :)

[LenaDaLlama]

Wow....interesting reading...sorry to those who have had troubles in the dining room. It made me think about the tables we have been assigned to. Personally, we don't like to have a "set" time to eat when on vacation. So, that was difficult for us. But anyhow, we actually only ate in the dining room one night out of the seven on each cruise. It was simply because we always seemed hungry at the wrong time!! Now, after reading all these stories, I certainly hope the nice people assigned to our tables didn't think we were avoiding them or had a problem with them.... :eek:

 

Now I am feeling bad.... :( :(

[boomboom51]

I hadn't given it a lot of thought but on the Enchantment of the Seas 7/31 sailing, we were originally to be seated at a table for 8 (according to our Sea Pass Card). However before dinner the first night we recieved a note in our room stating due to overbooking (ya right) that our table had been changed to another for 6 (for which only ourselves and another couple shared the whole cruise). I can only assume a group or family had been disconnected and they moved us to accomodate. No big deal and it was handled in a reasonable way (of course the truth would have been nice). Especially since we had not sat with or met any of the others yet, it didn't matter to us, except that we do like to sit with other couples. The folks we dined with were very nice and all was well.

 

 

I am always amased at the number of great friends we make on cruises and likewise the number of idots (sorry I use the word in a general way to include all of the above mentioned types none of us care to be around) you see on board.

 

Why RCL and some of the others also can't find there way to be a little more costomer service oriented is beyond me. I hope the OP never has to relive a situation like this again and hope they let us know if RCL ever gets their act together and makes things right.

[JanMD]

We had something similar but worst on the Granduar of the Seas over the 4th of July. We were placed on the 2nd night at a table of 8. We got there and was about to get our entree and the father of the family arrived and said- YOU DO NOT BELONG HERE AT THIS TABLE- THIS IS OUR TABLE AND IT IS A FAMILY TABLE AND YOU ARE NOT FAMILY!! We just got up and stood up the head waiter came over and moved us upstairs to a very nice table. Why did they not place us there in the first place- we have no idea. But the man was rude and his tune. We were in a state of shock. Never have been talked to like that ever. Had to wait for the table to get to the entree until we were able to eat-- it was formal night also.

I went after dinner and filed a written complaint with the pursers desk= nothing happened at all. We were told that there were be an explaination,et= nothing.

We did write a letter to RCI and they did get in contact with us within 2.5 weeks of the letter. It was not professional of the Maitre D to not address it himself- he was like I don't want to hear anything.

If they would just have the upstairs- personal choice then that would eliminate the whole seating arrangements.

[Emdee]

Our experience was even worse. We were three set together in a family group who wanted to be by themselves. My 15 year old went down to the table before us on the first night only to be treated very rudely by the elders of the family. When we arrived she whispered that we were not wanted. Thereafter the grandfather of the group came at us complaining that he had asked for a table for 7 and not 10 and they didnt want to sit with us etc. Even tried to pull rank on us saying he was a repeat passenger( he was on his 2nd cruise! We were platinum at that time!). In between courses my husband excused himself and went to see the head waiter and asked for another table. Our obnoxious tablemates had already tried that even going so far as grabbing the head waiter's collar. Fortunately they agreed to move to a small table in an alcove. Nothing great but a lot better than sitting with this rude lot................

[keeper236]

It is a good thing thing they are building bigger ships these days, it seems from many of these posts they need them to fit in all the egos that take cruises.

[moisture]

That stinks, I feel for you. We always request to be alone, so that doesn't happen. Even for breakfast, I don't want to share my table with others.

[KamloopsCruisers]

We have not been removed from our dining table, but we have asked to be moved - twice - and on the same cruise, our first!

 

We were cruising with our teenage daughter. First night, first cruise, we were seated with another couple also sailing with their teenage daughter. I thought, how considerate of RCCL to place our families together. Wrong! This couple also had two teenage boys, left a home, because teenage boys were "animals" and they didn't deserve a cruise. No matter how we tried to change the conversation to ports of call, etc. the conversation returned to their boys. Several times the mom announced how lucky we were not to be raising sons, not knowing that we had lost our teenage son in an accident. We tried to be polite, but this was one long, painful dinner, so we asked the Maitre D to move us.

 

Second night, new table of 10. This table was filled with with a family travelling together - grandparents, children & grandchild. What a fun family. They made us feel so at home and we all laughed throughout the evening. Over desert they explained that three members of their family were dining at another table. Despite their efforts, they had been unsuccessful in having their son, daughter-in-law and grandson be seated at the same table. So, DH & I made another visit to the Maitre D, and asked to be moved again and requested our seats to be given to their family members. (Happily this was done).

 

Third time lucky. We were seated with two retired ladies from Belgium and a younger couple from New York. Delightful people. Daughter was quite embarrassed about all this moving about and did not join us for nights 3, 4 & 5. Our new tablemates were very surprised when she showed up to dine with us on night 6. While we had talked about her during our dinnertime conversations, they didn't realize she was sailing with us. We still exchange Christmas cards with our tablemates.

 

Since then, we've had some great (and not so great) dining companions. Some have become good friends and others, well have been "different". But, we have not asked, nor have we been asked, to move dining tables.

[Blazerboy]

First, Thanks, Caviargal! Knew there had to be a good explanation!:) No, even I would be hard pressed to make polite excuses to people who didn't speak English and evinced no desire to make an effort to acknowledge me! ( If they tried to communicate, I'd have a harder time, probably break down and see if my rusty French worked.:rolleyes: ) Thanks for correcting my assumptions.

 

For everyone else: Just want to say that I'm a HUGE fan of the assigned seating thing, as it has, at its best, truly added to the cruise experience with new friendships and pleasants evenings in the dining room, and, at worse, provided good stories for later. Obviously, it's been more of the good than bad. The only thing I didn't like about Free-style/personal choice is that we missed out on opportunities to meet people and develop a freindship over meals because we either ate alone, or never saw the people again on these large ships! But I guess I'm pretty social, too. Imagine this can be hard for people who aren't.

 

And Schplinky, usually I don't agree with you (those darned clothing threads! Just kidding;) ) but I think what you said about conversation is absolutely correct, and the art and enjoyment of pleasant conversation is being lost. Small talk DOES have social value, and can be fun! (now I sound like a camp councelor/cheer leader for the socially timid!:D )

[caviargal]

For everyone else: Just want to say that I'm a HUGE fan of the assigned seating thing, as it has, at its best, truly added to the cruise experience with new friendships and pleasants evenings in the dining room, and, at worse, provided good stories for later. Obviously, it's been more of the good than bad. The only thing I didn't like about Free-style/personal choice is that we missed out on opportunities to meet people and develop a freindship over meals because we either ate alone, or never saw the people again on these large ships! But I guess I'm pretty social, too. Imagine this can be hard for people who aren't.

 

)

 

For me, dinner in the dining room has always been a highlight of the day! I can take my time getting ready, enjoy a nice glass of wine in the Champagne Bar prior, and then sit down to a lovely meal. The food comes in second to the company and I, too, have made many a friend over a cruise ship dining table.

 

As one that sometimes sails solo, Freestyle made this experience impossible to duplicate, and I felt like I really missed out. I LIKE dining at the same time, same table each evening, except for those nights when I enjoy the option of a specialty restaurant. My dining table assignments on RCI as a solo sailor have always resulted in a pleasant experience.

[cdollaz]

While I think it is very valid to ask to be moved if you are at a table with people with horrible social skills, I can't imagine asking to have others removed. If you have a problem, then you should be the one moving, not the others at the table. People suck.

[Schplinky]

While I think it is very valid to ask to be moved if you are at a table with people with horrible social skills, I can't imagine asking to have others removed. If you have a problem, then you should be the one moving, not the others at the table. People suck.

 

Given the way head waiters seem to work, the HW here may have decided it was easier to move two people than six. Who knows? Maybe the people asked to move and the HW said it was just easier to get rid of this couple.

[cdollaz]

Given the way head waiters seem to work, the HW here may have decided it was easier to move two people than six. Who knows? Maybe the people asked to move and the HW said it was just easier to get rid of this couple.

 

That scenario doesn't reconcile with the OP's statement that the others "asked" for she and her husband to be removed.

[PhoenixCruiser]

Given the way head waiters seem to work, the HW here may have decided it was easier to move two people than six. Who knows? Maybe the people asked to move and the HW said it was just easier to get rid of this couple.

 

That is exactly what I was thinking.

 

###

[Schplinky]

That scenario doesn't reconcile with the OP's statement that the others "asked" for she and her husband to be removed.

 

Agreed, but she was getting her info from the HW

[cdollaz]

Agreed, but she was getting her info from the HW

 

If that were the case, the HW would be lying. I'm really not buying that but anything's possible.