Maasdam 11-8-06 Review, including a note on the near-grounding

[Operator]

Well now. Operator and spouse, having endured the "disabled-dam" debacle of Spring 2005, decided to give the Maasdam another go, running the same itinerary out of Norfolk and through the Caribbean (albeit at a different time of year). Since it makes me giggle, I will offer this objective report in Q & A format.

 

Q: Would you please set the stage with basic info on you and your spouse?

 

A: With pleasure. We are a patent attorney and a school administrator from Virginia. Mid 40's. Second cruise, both on HAL, same ship and itinerary.

 

Q: Why did you get back on the ship after the mess last year?

 

A: Simple. We are in close proximity to Norfolk, enjoy smaller ships, love the Caribbean, and wanted to see the upgrades included in the SOE. The "discount on your next booking" offered after the 2005 mess didn't hurt, either.

 

Q: Why did you put the discount part in quotes?

 

A: You're very perceptive. It is in quotes to underscore my contempt for this industry-wide retention practice. When my hotel room is inadequate, my bill is reduced. When a restaurant has a problem, my bill is reduced. When a cruise line screws up, they invite me back for a lower price. Would anyone have bought a second Ford Pinto - even at a discount - after the first one exploded? True, it appears to have worked in this case, but there are other circumstances that also contributed to our decision to repeat on the Maasdam; these other circumstances are irrelevant and so are not included here.

 

Q: So how did it go?

 

A: That's the subject of this review. Please be more specific.

 

Q: Okay, how was Norfolk?

 

A: Unseasonably warm, on both ends. But - assuming you meant to ask

about embarkation - I am pleased to report that embarkation went smoothly and on schedule. We were onboard shortly after 1200, and in our room at 1300.

 

Q: Where did you stay?

 

A: In a deluxe suite on the starboard side (Nav deck, obviously).

 

Q: No, I mean where did you stay in Norfolk?

 

A: My apologies. We stayed at the Radisson, and found it average. The transfers and free parking are handy. We prefer coming in a day early in order to avoid any possible problems attendant a last-minute (read "day of departure") arrival, such as traffic, car trouble, etc. The food was hideous in the hotel restaurant.

 

Q: How was the suite?

 

A: At the Radisson, or on the ship?

 

Q: Touche. How was the suite on the ship?

 

A: About the same as it was 18 months ago. Flat panel TV saved some space - I believe it was a 20" LG - but we rarely turned it on. We prefer a deluxe for the space - we had contemplated a verandah suite but went ahead with the deluxe - while we find the suite amenities only mildly interesting. Tragically, the AC in our suite was nonfunctional for several days.

 

Q: What are the suite amenities?

 

A: They are well-described in other posts, but the ones we found most compelling were the preferred tendering at HMC (though this perk was unusable - more on HMC later) and (I'm assuming here) higher staff/guest ratio. Our steward was seemingly omnipresent, and very efficient. Of course we tipped him heavily and frequently; perhaps this helped. The Neptune lounge we found handy only for the presence of the concierge, through whom we booked our excursions and made other arrangements (spa, etc.).

 

Q: How was the ride?

 

A: I love the motion of the ocean, and had the chance to enjoy it during the first two and last two days of this cruise. YMMV, of course.

 

Q: How was the weather?

 

A: Perfect. Occasional showers in the islands, but plenty of luxuriant hot sun.

 

Q: How was HMC?

 

A: Beautiful. We were in a cabana, and found the beach and ocean delightful. Tendering was an unmanaged free-for-all. Our preferred tendering priviliges would have required us to walk to the front of a long and cranky line of pax, many of whom became angry and combative when other suite-dwellers attempted this maneuver. No crew present, no separate line, no announcement about people with gold cards jumping line, just a wing and a prayer. We waited our turn. Beach was crowded near the dock, less so farther out. Don't even ask about the lunch.

 

Q: What was wrong with the lunch?

 

A: !

 

Q: Sorry. Any complaints?

 

A: Yes - the food was average or worse, and they ran out of several items (including all hamburger and hot dog buns) by 1:30.

 

Q: How was the staff on-ship?

 

A: Stewards were fantastic. All managers except the Captain were combative and uncooperative. Ms. Coomer and Mr. Streuding deserve special mention, and not it a positive light.

 

Q: Were you on time to the ports on this cruise? I seem to remember you missed HMC and Puerto Rico last time...

 

A: Ah, you are very astute, and I appreciate your remembering our travails. The ship made all ports on time this trip.

 

Q: Did you have to row to make that happen?

 

A: Funny. We don't think they even had to shut down the AC at night for extra power (as we believe they did last year; reviewing tech specs to ascertain if accessory power can be rerouted to propulsion in an emergency, but I am pretty sure it can be). We can only assume that - at least for this cruise - the mechanicals functioned as they are intended. I expected this, as monitoring of the ship's position during the weeks preceding our departure showed several runs with average speeds approaching 20 knots (vs. the 14-15 we made last Spring).

 

Q: How was the ship?

 

A: Surprisingly poor. AC was a prevalent problem, and CS handling of the issue was insulting and ridiculous. The deteriorating condition of the ship was evident throughout, from the split vinyl banquettes on A deck to the frayed fabric of the Ocean Bar chairs. The gym was an exception - beautifully restored and updated. Truthfully, it seemed that the ship was in worse shape after the SOE refits. The ship was clean - probably because of the army of staff that were charged with keeping it so - and seemed to have many of the previous defects repaired (Lido door, plumbing, etc.).

 

Q: How about the food?

 

A: How about it?

 

Q: Argh! Did you enjoy the food?

 

A: Not really. A shade worse than it was in 2005. The menus have been updated to offer more interesting options, and I continue to marvel at the crew's ability to prepare 6000 meals per day. The Pinnacle was essentially unchanged, save the increased upcharge and the installation of Indonesian staff.

 

Q: That's not very enthusiastic.

 

A: That's not a question.

 

Q: Okay, why aren't you more enthusiastic about the food?

 

A: Much better. Simply because it is not - in our opinion - anything about which to write home. I have heard discussions contemplating a plainer menu as a concession to the more delicate consititution of the older passengers, but I suspect the truth is that the massive number of meals prepared simply require less labor-intensive dishes - which tend to be less stellar than dishes that do require a great deal of labor all at the last minute. And, yes, I took the kitchen tour. I know the ingredients are fresh (or frozen when necessary, as the lobster), and I am not knocking the chefs nor the overall food quality under the circumstances. To put it in perspective, I'd rate a top restaurant meal at 95-100, my personal preparations as 85-95, chain restaurants (take your pick) as 60-70, and the food onboard as 60-65.

 

Q: How were the ports?

 

A: Numerous. St. Thomas (which we have visited many times over the years) has continued to develop and is now a bit too touristy for our taste. Still a beautiful place, however, with excellent prices on jewelry and watches. Barbados is beautiful with that lovely equatorial sky. Barbados and the ABC islands are among our favorites, by the way. Dominica and...

 

Q: ABC?

 

A: Please don't interrupt. Aruba, Bonaire, Curacao.

 

Q: Sorry.

 

A: No problem. Dominica and St. Kitt's are rustic, with agressive local vendors and hawkers. Our stop at Puerto Rico was quite short, though - as memory serves - there isn't much there save the rum factory, the fort, and a handful of very old churches.

 

Q: What did you do on the sea days?

 

A: Enjoyed breakfast en suite, laid out in the sun, read many books, watched an occasional movie (The Breakup is possibly the worst waste of celluloid in the history of movies), and generally relaxed. That reminds me - the Wajang theater enjoyed significant improvements with the SOE upgrades - better projector and better screen. The audio system was HEAVILY calibrated toward the low end, with much too much bass. Cooking 'classes' were okay.

 

Q: Did you meet lots of interesting people onboard?

 

A: Nice phraseology. Yes. Even in the face of problems, the pax were friendly and outgoing (sometimes to a fault).

 

Q: Would you describe the average passenger, being more diplomatic than you were in the Maasdam 2005 review?

 

A: Ahem. Certainly: the passengers tend to be older couples (60's+).

 

Q: That's it?

 

A: You told me to be nice. More fully, the crowd thins out significantly as the evening latens. Many folks seem to have unique interpretations of dress codes. Sedentary might be a diplomatic capsule. Many more wheelchairs and canes in evidence this time.

 

Q: Okayyyy.... Anything else to report?

 

A: Yes.

 

Q: Namely?

 

A: As we followed the pilot into Norfolk early this morning, the bridge somehow managed to misunderstand the pilot's instructions and had to make an emergency maneuver to avoid running aground. The ship listed severely (at least 30-35 degrees), sending furniture and glass crashing everywhere, wreaking havoc in the kitchen, and emptying the Lido pool into the forward elevator shafts. I honestly thought we were going over or down.

 

Q: Are you kidding?

 

A: Not a bit. One wonders if the generally observed decrease in English language skills throughout the crew might have contributed to this near-disaster. One also expects the HAL apologists to blame it on the pilot.

 

Q: Why do you say that?

 

A: Because HAL has artfully created a large and impenetrable "white wall of silence", in which the senior staff all categorically deny that HAL ever does anything wrong. I believe this rubs off on many pax.

 

Q: Could you give an example?

 

A: I could, but anonymity and decorum tie my hands. Here's a parallel. Imagine asking a Sr. Manager if there was any way to have the completely non-functioning lights in your suite illuminated. Their answer would be one or more of these:

"We've already provided you with a flashlight"

"Many guests prefer that lighting level and it is within our acceptable range"

"We are sorry you find the lighting unsatisfactory"

"I personally keep the lights off in my home and prefer it that way"

 

Q: Really?

 

A: Yes.

 

Q: Would you cruise on HAL again, and why or why not?

 

A: Absolutely not. We'd prefer a higher quality experience (the SOE changes made only minor improvements, leaving needed changes undone) and the HAL culture is not (in our experience, based on the 2005 mess and on the consistent apathy of senior staff to obvious problems this time) particularly interested in the satisfaction of the customer. We believe that the limitless population of aging boomers allows HAL to take a cavalier attitude towards its customers, on the assumption that for every one who decides to leave there are probably three more waiting in the wings at a travel agency. We also met several people who blamed problems on the Captain, the CD, or the ship, all the while proclaiming loyalty to the line even as they sweated through nights in 80-degree rooms.

 

Q: Would you cruise again on any line?

 

A: Most definitely. We greatly enjoy the ability to visit multiple ports without packing/unpacking/island-hopping on rickety little planes. The solitude of sea days - with the clear air, sounds of the sea, and nothing one must do for hours on end - is a highlight for us. We'd seek a line with enrichment activities plus better food.

 

Q: Thank you.

 

A: You are quite welcome. We also welcome questions from the community, though we discourage replies in the vein of "HAL is the best, you are just a malcontent"; this is simply not true in any way, and if I ever get written satisfaction from Seattle, I'll post it here. Don't hold your breath - I couldn't get anyone to write down their repeatedly stated position that "74 degrees is an acceptable temperature in a room with the AC on full cold".

 

-Operator

[AirGorilla]

That is one of the funniest, best written posts that I have read in a long time. Thank you.

 

I hope that your next cruise is much better!!

[Krazy Kruizers]

Thanks for your review.

 

You didn't mention if the ship listed to port or starboard.

 

74 degrees -- horrible!!

[Sea King]

very well written review ..

 

Q&A format something I haven't seen in the past .. interesting way of sharing comments .. must be the "lawyer in you";)

 

have been on Maasdam a number of times .. admittedly, she has her "failings" such as "less than perfect" A/C:) but overall the crew, IMHO, compensates for many of the problems which for the most part are corrected fairly quickly

 

if you were having consistent problems, though, did you consider taking those directly to the concierge, or the GRM or the HM? I've met Mr. Streuding on more than 1 occasion and have found him to be nothing less than an absolute gentleman .. I actually mentioned my cabin "deficiencies" to him one time; not only did he listen but as importantly saw they were resolved by the next morning .. sorry, just can't share your opinion about him

 

I'm also wondering about this: you did not criticize the captain and in fact appeared to at least imply he was cordial .. did you ever attempt to speak with him? I know that Maasdam has 2 captains who alternate: which one was aboard your cruise? I have sailed with each; both (Capts. Draper and Vanderloo) are very out-going, friendly and approachable

 

before you "totally give up" on HAL, suggest you might wish to consider another cruise aboard a newer ship than Maasdam: my recommendation(s) would be Rotterdam, Zaandam, Volendam, Noordam, Amsterdam or Veendam

 

you might also be interested in knowing the Maasdam finishes sailing out of Norfolk at the end of this year and returns to Port Everglades

 

really enjoyed your comments ..

[Operator]

Ship listed to starboard, with smaller 'snap-back' list to port.

 

We concur that other HAL ships are likely better, but will try another line first.

 

We did of course escalate all issues as appropriate, but found all levels of management (except Capt. Draper) to be similar; polite tone, yes, but combative content, as described in OP. More specifically, mgmt. would counter any reported problem with either a deflection as described OR a true fact that does not address the complaint. Examples (fabricated for clarity and confidentiality - these did not actually occur):

 

Pax: "Our toilet does not flush" HAL: "Our toilets are consistently the most reliable in the industry. Perhaps you don't understand how the mechanism works".

 

or

 

Pax: "Our lights have not worked for days, and we've been stumbling around in the dark. Look at these bruises" HAL: "Your lights are working now".

 

This style dialogue must be intended to avoid EVER admitting that a problem exists. We were never once able to get anyone at HAL to admit anything was wrong anywhere on the ship; they instead made it seem that any complainant was a malcontent or too picky. This was a consistent experience across many pax (with whom we spoke frequently). No negative construction, no negative rebuttal, just polite deflection and misdirection. And yes, the "lawyer in me" found this infuriating.

 

-Operator

[cruisecache&squash]

WOW. I can't believe that list! :eek: What an unfortunate cruise! I can see why you would not cruise again with that line.

 

We are going on its next cruise on the 30th, so I hope they fix the A/C by then. From the repeated reports of A/C trouble, I kind of doubt it. I wonder why the list didn't make the news like the Princess one? I'd definitely like to hear more details about that! Wow.

[fann1sh]

I was on Maasdam February 2005 and also experienced a/c problems. After frantic requests because of health issues, 74 degrees (which I was also told was "normal") came down to 70 with curtains kept closed. There seems to be some ability to shunt a/c flow from one place to another, and in this case it was the dining room (and Pinnacle) that went without. Early seating temp began around 74 degrees, climbed to 80 - late seating was even warmer.

 

I'm booked on Zuiderdam for next December. I'm a former family law lawyer, just turned 50, travelling with 80something parents in a deluxe aft suite. HAL makes sense for us, but the "S" class ships aren't aging well mechanically. Zuidy is the oldest Vista class, and if I hear of similar a/c problems, I'll bail.

[diboja]

A very concise, well written report.

 

But it doesn't leave me with a nice warm fuzzy feeling - as we sail on the Maasdam in January!!!

[sail7seas]

Thanks for your report. Sorry you found Maasdam lacking.

 

While I do not claim her (or any ship) to be perfect, we love her. Sailed her for 14 days this past August and are booked for 4 more cruises next summer.

 

Sea King commented about the Captains who alternate aboard Maasdam and you'd be hard pressed to find better anywhere. Captain Draper and Captain van der Loo are both such gentleman and so eager for all guests to have the best cruise possible. Captain Draper is currently Master and seeing as you were in an "S" cabin, if you attended, you should have met him at the Suite Welcome Aboard. Seeing as you (presumably) knew who he was, and knowing he is very visible out and about the ship, I think it likely he would have been approachable with any issues you might have had. Kees Streuding is an excellent HM (and very nice man) ..... I'm shocked if you got no help from him. Did you speak with him?

 

Rather than give up on HAL, I think Sea King's recommendation you try another ship might be something to consider. Upon researching, you will find every ship at any time can have a/c problems and food is so subjective and different on the same ship depending upon Chef. One Chef's style may be more to your taste than another. Seeing as you like the stewards so well (and I can't imagine how anyone would not ---they are incredible IMO), why give up the line?

 

Thanks for sharing with us. Always enjoy hearing about people's varying experiences aboard the ships.

 

Welcome Back.

 

[tomc]

Uh-oh, I've got competition. :D And darned well-written, funny competition at that.

[Old As Dirt Mom]

Yes, yes, very clever, witty, observant, informative, enjoyable, and entertaining, but not original.

 

For a little bit of context, I post here Operator's review of Maasdam from April, 2005, and his follow-up to questions from that time. You will note that at the end of his follow-up last year, he stated that he probably wouldn't sail with HAL again. He has reiterated in his latest review that he won't sail HAL again. I look forward to next year's version of his Maasdam review.;)

 

Karin

[BumperII]

With apologies to Operator, I just couldn't resist this.:o

Well now. Bumper and spouse, (SF49erfan) having enjoyed the "beautiful and elegant Maasdam” over Christmas, 2005, decided to give the Maasdam another go, running a different itinerary out of Norfolk and through the Caribbean, I will offer this subjective report in Q & A format.

 

Q: Would you please set the stage with basic info on you and your spouse?

 

A: We are a retired police commander and a school teacher from Philadelphia, Mid 60’s, tenth cruise, fourth on HAL, two each, Maasdam and Statendam.

 

Q: Why did you get back on the ship after last year?

 

A: Simple. We can drive to Norfolk, enjoy smaller ships, love the Caribbean, and wanted to see the upgrades included in the SOE. The “police and fire” “discount” didn’t hurt either. At the prices offered, why, we can’t afford to stay home.

Q: Why did you put the discount part in quotes?

 

A: It is in quotes to underscore my appreciation for this Holland America courtesy extended to military, police, fire and teachers.

Q: So how did it go?

 

A: That's the subject of this review. Please be more specific.

 

Q: Okay, how was Norfolk?

 

A: Unseasonably warm, on both ends. But - assuming you meant to ask

about embarkation - I am pleased to report that embarkation went smoothly and on schedule. We were onboard shortly after 1200, and in our room at 1300.

 

Q: Where did you stay?

 

A: We booked the cheap seats, MM inside guarantee. HAL upgraded us to a category E outside stateroom amidships.

 

Q: No, I mean where did you stay in Norfolk?

 

A: We stayed overnight at a Microtel in Salsberry Maryland. Super clean and comfortable. Free long distance and Internet.

 

Q: How was the cabin?

 

A: About the same as it was ten months ago except that they threw in a bathtub and a window. We only use the cabin for the four S’s. (Sleep, shower, shave, etc.)

 

Q: How was the ride?

 

A: I love the motion of the ocean, and had the chance to enjoy it during the first two and last two days of this cruise. Cape Hatteras does give one a bit of a ride.

 

Q: How was the weather?

 

A: Perfect. Occasional showers in the islands, but plenty of luxuriant hot sun.

 

Q: How was HMC?

 

A: Beautiful. We left the ship aboard the new land based tenders. These were a real improvement as they can now board twice as many passengers per loop. They had just about everyone ashore that wanted to go ashore in less than forty-five minutes. We left the ship and proceeded directly to one of the bars to listen to the calypso combo.

Q: What was wrong with the lunch?

 

A There was no food served on the island. We were late getting into HMC, so they served the barbeque by the pool on the Lido deck.

 

Q: Sorry. Any complaints?

 

A: Yes, some scoundrel stole the cork out of my lunch.

 

Q: How was the staff on-ship?

 

A: Stewards were fantastic. All managers including the Captain were cooperative. Every request was fulfilled cheerfully, and every need was accommodated gracefully.

Q: Were you on time to the ports on this cruise?

A: Other than HMC, the ship made all ports on time this trip.

 

Q: Did you have to row to make that happen?

 

A. Actually no, everything went smoothly.

 

Q: How was the ship?

 

A: Surprisingly good. AC was a problem at first. Our cabin steward called a maintenance man. He fixed the problem in short order; we had no problem for the rest of the cruise.

Q: How about the food?

 

A: How about it?

 

Q: Argh! Did you enjoy the food?

 

A: Yes, but bear in mind they prepare six thousand meal a day aboard ship. What they are serving up really isn’t fine dining, it is closer to banquet dining, and the HAL chefs serve it exceptionally well. But no bonvivant would ever confuse it with fine dining.

 

Q: That's not very enthusiastic.

 

A: HAL more than made up for it, they treated our table to a complimentary bottle of wine the second night out. Then a few nights later, one of the ship’s officers joined us for dinner, and he popped to three more bottles of wine.

 

Q: Okay, why aren't you more enthusiastic about the food?

 

A: Simply because the entire world’s truly great food is poor folks food. Only the peasants of this world had to learn how to make tasty, inviting meals out of the remnants while the upper crust was eating high off the hog.

Q: How were the ports?

 

A: St. Thomas has become touristy. The prices on jewelry and watches are higher than on Jeweler’s here in Philadelphia. Barbados and Dominica were fantastic, loved the rain forest tram. St. Kitts, the narrow gage railroad was a hoot. San Juan, well if you’ve ever been in one city, you have been in them both.

 

Q: What did you do on the sea days?

 

A: Enjoyed breakfast meeting other couples in the dining room. We attended the guest speaker lectures, read two books, played team trivia, and joined our cruise mates for adult beverages. The entertainment included an excellent soprano, a master of string instruments, (country, folk, Spanish and classical guitar), and a rib aching funny juggler-comedian.

Q: Did you meet lots of interesting people onboard?

 

A: We were seated at the late main seating, table of nine, who can only be described as the best dinner companions you could hope for. The conversation and light banter went on endlessly and we were the last ones to leave the dining room every night.

Q: Would you describe the average passenger, being more diplomatic than you?

 

A: Certainly: the passengers tend to be older couples. They haven’t even been to law school.

 

Q: That's it?

 

A: The crowd thins out significantly as the evening progresses. Sedentary might be a diplomatic capsule. Several wheelchairs and canes in evidence. Nothing stops these folks from cruising; HAL does an excellent job of accommodating special needs.

 

Q: Okayyyy.... Anything else to report?

 

A: Yes.

 

Q: Namely?

 

A:. One also expects the HAL apologists to pass the buck.

 

Q: Why do you say that?

 

A: Because HAL lawyers have artfully created a large and impenetrable "white wall of silence", in which the senior staff all categorically deny that they ever do anything wrong, just like lawyers and bureaucrats. (The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers.... Henry IV, Part 2, Act V, Scene II, Wm. Shakespeare)

If you want a problem addressed, see your cabin steward or waiter. The staff at the front desk are pretty good too.

 

Q: Would you cruise on HAL again, and why or why not?

 

A: Absolutely. We have two more HAL Cruises booked in the next three months. We are part of that the limitless population of aging boomers. We also met several people who were able to have every problem addressed promptly and courteously.

Q: Would you cruise again on any line?

 

A: Most definitely. We greatly enjoy the ability to visit multiple ports without packing/unpacking. We also enjoy island hopping on a forty-year-old DeHaviland floatplane, one of the finest airframes ever manufactured. The solitude of sea days - with the clear air, sounds of the sea, and nothing one must do for hours on end - is a highlight for us. We take advantage of the HAL enrichment activities.

Q. What about the fact that the Maasdam is showing her age, you know, rust spots, cracks in the upholstery, and frayed fabric on the bar stools?

A: I didn’t have time to locate these defects, I was momentarily distracted by the assistant cruise director with the hauntingly beautiful eyes, legs than went on forever, and the soft warm curves of that youthful, nubile body. But of course, I hardly ever notice things like that anymore.

Q: Were you on the same ship as Operator, or were you on that other Maasdam?

 

A: It is hard to believe we were on the same ship isn’t it?

Q: Thank you.

A: You are quite welcome. We also welcome questions from the community, though we discourage replies in the vein of "HAL is the best, you are just a malcontent". Please remember that I’ve only been wrong once in my entire life, and that was when I said that I thought I made a mistake.

- Bumper

[Operator]

S7S: Yes, of course we spoke with both Draper and Streuding. I agree with your assessment of the Captain (and of Capt. van der Loo, who was Master during our last trip). We saw Draper at the Suite reception, as well as at the last day's Suite Lunch in the Crow's Nest, and he was solicitous and concerned. I have nothing but praise for Draper, though I was disappointed I could not find similar professionalism in his senior staff. No comment on Streuding. Why give up on the line? Because after 22 days and $15,000, I've had numerous unresolved (or very slowly resolved - over the course of 4-5 days) complaints and written two letters to HAL Corporate. My land vacations average similar cost, but rarely give cause for any concern, and I've only written one letter to a hotel in the last 15 years. When we next cruise, we'll roll the dice on Regent or Silversea (probably the latter, as my Italian is passable already), again with the benefit of significant insights gleaned on these boards.

 

Middle-Aged Mom: There will be no more reviews of any HAL vessels by me, I can assure you. Note that my 2005 review (the "original original" :) ) said I most likely would not repeat on HAL. This year's review (the "second original" :D ) alludes to ancillary factors that encouraged us to repeat, but concludes firmly that we will "absolutely not" repeat on HAL again. I am, of course, flattered that you remembered or found my 2005 notes...

 

Bumper: Apology accepted, royalties anticipated. I must get to Jeweler's Row sometime soon. I take exception to some of your culinary notes, but not strongly enough to debate them. I concur with one point - you'd never confuse it with fine dining. We didn't expect to, but we did expect to find better food quality. Finally, no, I don't find it hard at all to believe we were on the same ship. Our reviews match up and align quite well, both in content and in style (though the latter was expected...).

 

-Operator

[ger_77]

Operator: g-r-e-a-t . . . we've booked with a number of friends for our anniversary cruise in February; now you've got me re-thinking the whole thing.:(

 

BumperII: you've made me feel a bit better about our choice.

 

I hope some of the things will be fixed by the time we board the Maasdam in February, like the shabby chairs, etc. Some of our friends have never cruised before, while others have been on different lines and never on HAL, and I'd like to have them have a good impression of our favorite cruise line.

 

Smooth Sailing! :) :) :)

[Maryandi]

Thanks for such a great review. It makes me glad that in 2004 on 28 days on the Maasdam, when the AC went out, we complained for 2 days and finally they moved us to another cabin.

 

I wonder if we would have gotten the 'royal runaround 'as you did - if we were on the ship now.

 

M.A.

[Sea King]

wasn't tuned into CC in 2005

 

after having read April 05 critique (thanks to another poster) and taking into consideration Operator's response on this thread to what he himself wrote a year ago, must state respectfully that IMHO there is no credibility behind what was said

 

if I had sailed on a line that treated me like "dirt", coupled with the obvious dissatisfaction with the dining fare and the pax mix (it sounded like the "old age farm";)), the odds of me returning to the scene of the crime would have been the same as the odds of my being elected President

 

sorry: great review up to the point of when the "old one" reared its ugly head

 

in any event, still like the Q&A format:)

[BumperII]

Operator wrote one of the most entertaining reviews I've ever seen in this forum. I couldn't resist the opportunity to poke a little fun, but that was a terrific review. I would really enjoy meeting these folks on a future HAL cruise.

The credibility of Operator's obversations is not in question, one opinion is every bit as valid as any other. Operator's quick wit and sharp sense of humor are certainly evident and for that reason alone, one can only hope they will continue to contribute to this forum.

If Operator should have aanother change of heart, I'll bet my house that HAL will gladly accept their booking.:D

[djallar]

A: As we followed the pilot into Norfolk early this morning, the bridge somehow managed to misunderstand the pilot's instructions and had to make an emergency maneuver to avoid running aground. The ship listed severely (at least 30-35 degrees), sending furniture and glass crashing everywhere, wreaking havoc in the kitchen, and emptying the Lido pool into the forward elevator shafts. I honestly thought we were going over or down.

 

Q: Are you kidding?

 

A: Not a bit. One wonders if the generally observed decrease in English language skills throughout the crew might have contributed to this near-disaster. One also expects the HAL apologists to blame it on the pilot.

I wonder why, if the ship almost ran aground and the Lido pool was emptied into the forward elevator shafts, this forum hasn't been lit completely on fire. I went back to the roll-call and one of the posters wrote

I was surprised to hear that we almost went a ground on the final morning. I never felt anything.[/Quote]

Seems to me a 35 degree list would dump everyone out of bed :confused:

[Grumpy1]

Q. OK, Grumpy, you have a cruise booked on the Maasdam in June. Does this review give you second thoughts about sailing on that worn out old tub?

 

A. What worn out old tub? Oops, never answer a question with a question... Anyway, HAL doesn't own any worn out old tubs. Well, come to think of it there was a crack in the tub in my bathroom on Westerdam a couple of weeks ago, but it didn't leak, so no problem...

 

Grumpy, are you evading the question?

 

A. No, it just takes me a little time to get around to the answer sometimes... A little background first, though. My first HAL cruise was on Prinsendam in 2005... a little jaunt of 113 days... something called a Grand World Voyage. I had never heard of CruiseCritic when I booked, but a Google search on "Prinsendam" led me to this site and a few other places where reviews had been posted. After reading the reviews, I was almost convinced that I had made a huge mistake. Almost everything I found said that everything about the ship was bad.

 

Q. So you went onboard expecting the worst?

 

A. Are you kidding? I dug a little deeper and found threads here on CruiseCritic that were more recent than the reviews I had read. I figured out who the "players" were, who had an axe to grind and who was being honest about what one should expect. I went onboard fully expecting a fantastic voyage with better than average food, great service and a ship load of really nice people to get acquainted with.

 

Q. So were your expectations met?

 

A. Absolutely. Sure, there were a few glitches... over a period of 113 days there are bound to be. There were a couple of rude passengers, a couple of mechanical problems, but the good so far out weighed the negatives that there wasn't much impact from the negatives. It truly was a fantastic voyage.

 

Q. So what about your expectations for your Maasdam cruise.

 

A. Same as my expectations for Prinsendam. Well... maybe a bit higher since it is an official CruiseCritic Group Cruise and if everything isn't perfect Host Doug will swim with the fishes...

 

Q. So you expect that all of the problems noted by the OP will be completely resolved by then?

 

A. Maybe, maybe not... probably not. But I didn't see anything in the OP's list that would seriously hamper my enjoyment of the cruise. In fact, Slinkie is hoping the A/C is a little toward the warm side. 74-75 will be just fine with me, but she'll probably complain that it's still too chilly. Somewhat worn chairs in various lounges is not going to affect my cruise. We had some really worn faux wicker chairs and loungers on our balcony on Westerdam a few weeks ago. They weren't bad enough to fall through, so there was no need to make an issue of it. It was noted on the comment card. Had it been a safety issue, I'm sure it could have been easily handled with a comment to our room steward.

 

Q. So you aren't too picky about the little things?

 

A. I believe in letting the person that is most likely to be of help know about things that I know are not as they should be. If it is something that affects my enjoyment of the cruise, I expect and get action. Otherwise, I prefer to let the people do their jobs without me adding to their problems.

 

Q. Can you give an example of getting things accomplished?

 

A. Yes. When we boarded the Westerdam, our cabin, a Category SC aft balcony, absolutely reeked of cigarette smoke. This is totally unacceptable for us.. two reformed smokers. Now I have met people that would immediately storm the front desk demanding to be moved, escalate up to the GRM and then to the HM. My method was to comment to the room steward that we were expecting the cabin to not smell like stale cigarette smoke. Within seconds he was back with a little tub of a putty like material that he spread on the A/C vents. Within minutes the problem was gone. The steward explained that there had been a surprise Coast Guard inspection and he had to rush to get cabins ready. He apologized and accepted full responsibility for not doing his job. Problem solved, no hard feelings anywhere, and our steward not only received extra at the end of the cruise, he got very good comments from us on our comment cards. He took care of every request that we made and always asked if there was anything else he could do for us. If I had gone over his head and complained, it likely would have caused him problems and there probably would have been some resentment that would have resulted in only adequate service, not outstanding service.

 

Q. So you've never experienced any major problems on your cruises?

 

A. Ummm, a cabin flooded and carpet soaked wall to wall because an O-ring broke and got stuck in the toilet fill valve... that's sort of major I would say.

 

Q. Wow! I'll bet there was a ruckus raised about that!

 

A. That was a statement, not a question, but you bet wrong. I didn't see the steward in the hallway, so I called the front desk. Within a minute there was a team on the project with shop vacs and carpet cleaning equipment taking care of the aftermath while the plumbers fixed the cause. There were several calls from the front desk over the next few days wanting to make sure that everything had been or was being handled to our satisfaction.

 

Q. So you would describe your overall experiences on HAL ships as very good?

 

A. Yes, I would.

 

Q. Have you sailed on other lines?

 

A. Yes. On Celebrity, Royal Caribbean, Carnival and American Hawaii. They were all very good... except for Carnival Fascination, which was OK, but that was all I was expecting for a four night cruise.

 

Q. Will you sail on other lines again, or are you planning to stay with HAL in the future?

 

A. I have two more booked on HAL, but if I see an itinerary that I like, or if there is a group I want to sail with, I'll book other cruise lines. But I'll probably book some future cruises on HAL.

 

Q. Do you consider yourself to be one of the HAL apologists that some people refer to?

 

A. Not at all. But I have a background that has given me more insight into maintenance issues than most people have. I've been in the position of catching the flak from people that are clueless as to what it takes to maintain and repair complex systems. Ship happens! Sometimes there are easy fixes, sometimes a fix is almost impossible to accomplish quickly... witness the Oosterdam pod problems. There are always some people that demand that every problem be fixed immediately. If I have some insight to share as to why it can't be fixed immediately, I'll share that. If my insight tells me that it could have and should have been handled differently, I'll be the first to take HAL to task. And I've noticed the same about some of the other so-called apologists. there have been times when they have supported the person with the complaint.

 

Q. Do you have any other comments you would like to make?

 

A. Well of course I do! But brevity is my motto and this is getting long already, so I'll save it for another time. Have your people call my people if you wish to be further enlightened.

[DesertSunset]

I have never posted on CruiseCritic before; however, after reading this review, I feel compelled to add my two cents. To begin, my wife and I are in the 40-something crowd and HAL “loyalists” (as some would describe). Prior to discovering Holland America Line, we sailed with six other cruise companies (11 sailings). Our last 12 cruises have been with HAL – all in SA/Deluxe Verandah Suite accommodations.

 

We, too, were on the November 8, Maasdam sailing; Navigation Deck, starboard side; however, had quite a different experience than Operator. Ours was extremely positive.

 

Addressing the “hot topic” first, we also had problems with our suite’s plumbing system. The toilet malfunctioned and was repaired on day one - only to malfunction again the following day. Each time, through the coordination of the Neptune Concierge, Aizel (we didn’t feel it necessary to contact a senior officer), the crew worked diligently to fix the problem. All ships, old and new, encounter unforeseen technical issues. Accepting this fact, we were never stressed over the inconvenience. The Hotel Manager, Kees Streuding, was aware of the problem, expressed his genuine concern and made certain the situation was remedied quickly. At all times, he was friendly, courteous and professional, as was Captain Draper on the several occasions we had the opportunity to speak with him.

 

As for the Maasdam’s appearance and condition … in our opinion, the Maasdam was in excellent condition. We were fortunate enough to recently sail on the Noordam - a beautiful, new ship in perfect condition. However, you can’t compare a new vessel to a ship that is 13 years old (not that anyone was comparing); and an older vessel will, of course, show occasional signs of wear.

 

As for the food, we believe that no cruise ship truly has “fine dining” – as much as they may claim. We, personally, don't base our cruise experience on the food – quality or quantity. If we want “gourmet”, there are plenty of fine dining restaurants on land. However, WE thought the food was quite good!!

 

We are sorry to learn of Operator’s A/C problems, which seems to be at the root of his bad experience. Luckily, we had no issues with air-conditioning.

 

Hmmm, as for the listing ... like other pax, we did feel the movement, BUT it was no traumatic experience (has anyone confirmed 30 dgs?). After picking up a few pieces of broken glass, we were off to bed again. Not once did we feel there was a chance of us “going down”. And IMO, the comment about “communication due to language” was pure speculation and uncalled for.

 

In conclusion, from our perspective, the Maasdam is a beautiful ship and we would absolutely recommend her to anyone and everyone. And to those reading this board for information prior to making travel plans, Holland America Line offers an excellent product. We have many, many years of cruising ahead (the good Lord willing) and plan on spending our hard-earned dollars sailing on one “dam” ship or another. ~The End~

[Copper10-8]

I would like to publically thank Operator, Bumper II and the Grumpmeister for taking the time, effort and no doubt, hard work to entertain all of us here at the happy family of CC members with their reviews, reports and remarks!:) As a quick sidenote, (retired) Commander Bumper, you only listed three out of the four "S";).

These have been without a doubt some of the funniest cruise reviews I have seen in a long time!! Excellent job gentlemen! Since Operator took the well thought of yet obvious risk of identifying himself as a practicing baritone........banister.......barrister.................., sorry.........lawyer, I took the liberty to add just a couple of quick anecdotes from actual trial questions and answers:

Q: "Is your appearance this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?"

A: "No, this is how I dress when I go to work."

Q: "Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?"

A: "All my autopsies are performed on dead people."

 

Q: "All your responses must be oral, okay? What school did you go to?"

A: "Oral."

Q: "Do you recall the time you examined the body?"

A: "The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m."

Q: "And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?"

A: "No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him."

Q: "You were not shot in the fracas?"

A: "No, I was shot midway between the fracas and the navel."

Q: "Are you qualified to give a urine sample?"

A: "I have been since early childhood."

Q: "Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?"

A: "No."

Q: "Did you check for blood pressure?"

A: "No."

Q: "Did you check for breathing?"

A: "No."

Q: "So then is it possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?"

A: "No."

Q: "How can you be so sure, Doctor?"

A: "Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar."

Q: "But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?"

A: "It is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.":D

[the2ofus]

My thanks to one and all for helping to supply my daily quota of giggles!!

[bepsf]

I often hear of folks on the same sailing having differences in opinion regarding AC issues - what one thinks is perfectly functional the other thinks is absolutely trashed.

 

From personal experience, I know that a neighbor leaving their verandah door open can cause havoc w/ the AC system in adjacent staterooms.* I have the feeling that this was probably the issue given that the maintenance folks could find no fault w/ the system.

 

 

As far as the "30-35 degree " list:* It's a fact that Crown Princess during the recent incident that caused multiple injuries and excessive news coverage didn't exceed 10 degrees, much less the 30-45 degrees that some folks onboard claimed.*

 

Do I believe that a few glasses and other objects fell over and broke aboard Maasdam?*

Yes.

 

Do I believe that the Lido Pool emptied into the forward elevators? **

Not on your life!* It's laughably implausable that a roll (side-to-side motion) would cause water to move up and forward! *I've been in seas so rough that the water in the Midship pool smacked the end and splashed up against the glass of the Magrodome, but NEVER came close to the doors exiting the midship Lido, much less the elevators!

 

Perhaps some water did come down the elevator shafts from somewhere (spilled ice from nearby ice machines?), but it certainly wasn't from the pool.

[hammybee]

Well this has been a delightful read.

 

Sorry to hear the OP had another dissappointing cruise on the same ship. I think the OP will probably be happier sailing beyond mass marketed cruise lines. Perhaps Crystal will be more to their liking, in the future.

 

As for the list.....The early morning scare and uncertainty probably made it feel like it was more significant than it really was. It's understandable.

[CruiserRev]

I just returned from this cruise, and the story about the pool water is correct....as reported by the cruise director himself. That said, our room was unaffected by the list, and I heard of no reports of damage. All 4 of the forward elevators were temporarily down due to a short caused by the water. 2 were in operation by about 9AM during the bulk of debarkation.

 

While I enjoyed the format the OP used, and while some observations were apt, I think that most passengers on board had a good cruise experience. The air conditioning was an issue in some rooms, including ours. They actually came out to work on it--and found the temperature to be 5 degrees cooler by the vent than by the window. The cruise director even made a pre-show joke about the fact that turning the AC dial would do nothing. The food overall was good, but if you like red meat (as we do), the preparation was lacking. On the last formal night, we were served "filet mignon" that was more like flank steak, and the very best beef and lamb that we had was still inferior to Celebrity. All of that being said, we encountered gracious service, and enjoyed the ship and our fellow passengers. While we were not converted to HAL as our first choice, we would not hesitate to sail with HAL again.