Why a set curfew for teens?

[reallyitsmema]

obviously you cant read I stated that I am 56yrs of age and you seem to fit "that certain type of cruiser" I can remember my teens can you give respect and you will get it, I wish all adults were like my teenage nieces and nephews my daughter is a teen no more "get over it" how adult regards

I think part of the reason that both Sally and I felt you were a teenager is because of the way you type your posts. Many teenagers, including my 16 yr old, come from the age of the text message. They don't capitalize or use punctuation thus making their sentences very hard to read.

[TMarie]

Quick thing- for those of you who are making posts mocking me when I say that us teens are paying customers just like yourselves, how do you know if I pay or not? Both of my parents never wanted to cruise, however, I always did. Instead, I always saved up my money from Christmas/Birthdays/Job, etc, to pay for a cruise with myself and my Grandparents. I know that they always appreciated the fact that I would save all of my money to take them on a great vacation. Same thing goes to the person who made the comment about who pays for college. How do you know I am not paying for college myself?

 

You know, teenagers are always me me me....it gets annoying. Wonderful if you actually paid for it 100% on your own, but the cheapest that could possibly be is atleast $2000 w/o airfare if the trip is for a week. Most teens work crappy jobs that pay minimum wage, so its just not very likely for a teen to pay their own way.

 

And all i said was, "who pays for college?" because teens tend to think that they are adults because they pay a few bills. whoop de doo. And, im on the merry go round known as FASFA, and i know that usually, if your parents can afford to send you, they are forced to put the aid in their name. If you dont do financial aid, and you are living on campus there is no way possible that you are paying for it yourself! Because living in a dorm is ridiculously expensive for a matchbox room and there would be no way for you to work enough hours to pay for tuition AND pay for every day expenses.

 

And guess what? I have DONE this before. I had my own place, and tried to work full time and go to work part time, I tried to work 30 hours and go to school full time, and now i work 25 hours and go to school fulltime. Its not easy finding a ratio that works for you, and usually full time students are forced to take an array of class hours that make it difficult to have a solid work schedule instead of one offered by a place that pays minimum wage. (BTW, I dont make minimum wage, and I couldnt afford to live on my own at this point, although i could when i worked full time- but guess what! Didnt have time to take classes!)

 

Anyway, good luck with your education and have fun on your cruise. And dont ruin your grandparents time by being a brat and refusing to come in at an appropriate time. My guess is, they dont want you running around all night- regardless of if you paid for it or not! According to RCCL, they are still in charge of you!

[TMarie]

why are we talking about teenagers then, some adults are fools some teenagers also, would we put a curfew on stupid adults, who exhibit drunken behaviour or rely on security to sort it out, the same should apply to teens, not blanket bans to placate a certain type of cruiser regards

 

They do put things on adults who act stupid when they are drunk! Its kinda like house arrest, but its in your room and you can only order off the room service menu and cant leave the room. It happened to one of the people on my family cruise. They were talking about kicking the whole room off at the next port, but we only had one at sea day left before getting home.

 

And, adults are held reliable for their actions. But when something happens to a teen, only the adult is held responsible. Or most likely their parents. Why didnt you know where little Johnny was at 2 am? Blah blah blah. Teenagers make me not want to have kids EVER. But, my S/O always tells me "our kids will be different" :rolleyes:

[cruzinnluvinit]

You know, teenagers are always me me me....it gets annoying. Wonderful if you actually paid for it 100% on your own, but the cheapest that could possibly be is atleast $2000 w/o airfare if the trip is for a week. Most teens work crappy jobs that pay minimum wage, so its just not very likely for a teen to pay their own way.

 

And all i said was, "who pays for college?" because teens tend to think that they are adults because they pay a few bills. whoop de doo. And, im on the merry go round known as FASFA, and i know that usually, if your parents can afford to send you, they are forced to put the aid in their name. If you dont do financial aid, and you are living on campus there is no way possible that you are paying for it yourself! Because living in a dorm is ridiculously expensive for a matchbox room and there would be no way for you to work enough hours to pay for tuition AND pay for every day expenses.

 

And guess what? I have DONE this before. I had my own place, and tried to work full time and go to work part time, I tried to work 30 hours and go to school full time, and now i work 25 hours and go to school fulltime. Its not easy finding a ratio that works for you, and usually full time students are forced to take an array of class hours that make it difficult to have a solid work schedule instead of one offered by a place that pays minimum wage. (BTW, I dont make minimum wage, and I couldnt afford to live on my own at this point, although i could when i worked full time- but guess what! Didnt have time to take classes!)

 

Anyway, good luck with your education and have fun on your cruise. And dont ruin your grandparents time by being a brat and refusing to come in at an appropriate time. My guess is, they dont want you running around all night- regardless of if you paid for it or not! According to RCCL, they are still in charge of you!

I think it is great that there is a curfew for teens on ships. As everyone knows, teens can sneak out of their rooms (homes). This way the parents can go to sleep and know that their teens will be found, and returned to their room maybe before they get in trouble. Let's face it unless the cruise line has a slumber party, the activities after 11 or 12 are for adults not teens or children. I don't know but I would guess if they were with their parents, the cruise line would not enforce the rule.

 

Can you imagine if there is no curfew and the teen falls overboard? No one would know till morning if then because their parent thinks they are at breakfast. If I had a teen onboard I would love the curfew and my teen would abide by it.

 

 

IMHO

 

Linda

[Mysticks1]

why are we talking about teenagers then, some adults are fools some teenagers also, would we put a curfew on stupid adults, who exhibit drunken behaviour or rely on security to sort it out, the same should apply to teens, not blanket bans to placate a certain type of cruiser regards

 

I would think that the cruise lines consider themselves at more risk legally and in the public eye if a teenager were to get hurt/killed while on a cruise ship than if an adult were to have the same mishap.

For example, look at rape. If it were a 25 year old adult female versus a 15 year old it would be looked at much differently. The public would say the 25 year old might have been an active participant and not think much about it but there would be much discussion if a 15 year old were raped. The cruise line would be crucified for not taking appropriate measures to protect their underage passengers.

If all of the parents or guardians of the teens onboard would take responsibility for each and every one of them there would not be a need for an enforceable curfew. Too many parents are more worried about having fun and getting their vacation time in than worrying about what their children are doing. The same problem exists on land.

[TMarie]

I started making good summer money working with my father when I was 13. Babysitting made me some more good money. By 16 I had a good bank account. I made several thousand a year as a teen. It can happen. :)

 

several thousand doesnt compare to $20,000 + for a year of college living on campus.

 

Then add on a car payment, or car insurance, and clothing, and entertainment and gas ect ect....oh yea, CELL PHONE

 

Been there done that. My tuition for the University of Cincinnati is $9350 a year and that doesnt include room and board! (I loathe dorms..)

[reallyitsmema]

I think it is great that there is a curfew for teens on ships. As everyone knows, teens can sneak out of their rooms (homes). This way the parents can go to sleep and know that their teens will be found, and returned to their room maybe before they get in trouble. Let's face it unless the cruise line has a slumber party, the activities after 11 or 12 are for adults not teens or children. I don't know but I would guess if they were with their parents, the cruise line would not enforce the rule.

 

Can you imagine if there is no curfew and the teen falls overboard? No one would know till morning if then because their parent thinks they are at breakfast. If I had a teen onboard I would love the curfew and my teen would abide by it.

 

 

IMHO

 

Linda

You are incorrect about teen activities. Fuel is open until 1am or later for dancing for 15-17 yr olds. That age group gets Fuel exclusively after 11PM. The first night on the Mariner, arcade games were free to all starting at 11PM. Many teens use these facilities up until curfew.

[reallyitsmema]

Just to back up the FACTS that I posted, here is a link to the 15-17 yr old teen compasses http://s204.photobucket.com/albums/bb196/cruisinmama06/Royal%20Caribean%20AO%20Compass/

 

Not all kids are running around the ship, many are taking advantage of what RCI has to offer. Many parents are also sitting in the outside booths of Johnny Rockets at 1AM waiting to pick up their kids at curfew. I know this as a FACT as I was waiting for my 16 yr old on the Mariner in June with other parents.

[MaryZ]

Don't places like this exist on most of the newer ships, or is it just the ones I've been on?

 

The problem is that the very kids who need to use these facitlities are exactly the ones who don't use them. They don't want the supervision. Unless you lock them in the facility, you are not going to keep them from roaming about at all hours.

 

 

Some have them. And you are clearly right, the kids should want to use the places available to them but lots of them don't. Over thanksgiving on carnival glory my then 16 yr old daughter would go to meet up at teen activities and the counselors would just say, sorry we aren't having it because not enough teens showed interest. They toss them out of the teen disco so it can become the disco for adults. We haven't been on rccl in years now, so I have no idea what it is they offer and won't be worried about it since my youngest will already be 18. Right now the thing she is looking forward to is trying a slot machine ;)

[TMarie]

Yes it is true that most have their parents/grandparents pay, etc. I'll even admit that now my parents pay for the cruises. I paid for my first first three cruises before my Mom or Dad would even think about going on a cruise (which is why I used to go with my Grandparents). I just wanted to mention that whole thing that you think is not relevant because some of the posters are saying that I did not ever pay my own way, when really I have before.

 

Like i said, paying SOME of your bills or expenses does not make you an adult! When you live on your own, and do EVERYTHING on your own, you are an adult. Until then someone else is responsible for you. My parents are still responsible for me. I will be 23 and my parents still want to know where i am before they go to bed. Why? because they are good parents. When i lived on my own (100%) for a few years, I still talked to my mom every night and she still asked if i was in for the night or if i was going out...

 

I feel bad for kids who dont have parents like mine. They may be over protective at times but they are one of a hand full (including my brother and S/O0 that I know will come to my rescue if i ever need it.

[rsscaptain]

several thousand doesnt compare to $20,000 + for a year of college living on campus.

 

Then add on a car payment, or car insurance, and clothing, and entertainment and gas ect ect....oh yea, CELL PHONE

 

Been there done that. My tuition for the University of Cincinnati is $9350 a year and that doesnt include room and board! (I loathe dorms..)

 

Most of us past a certain age are well aware of those costs as we have been there done that long ago and have now been there done that for our own kids! :D Yes, kids are very expensive, and school esspecially good ones are very expensive.

 

I just think that there are some kids out there who do work hard, and have great jobs and save. It's not so far from likely that good money, enough for a cruise could be saved.

 

One of my little friends worked as a busgirl on weekends and was such a little hustler that the waitstaff tipped her out really well. She made at least $200 a week just on weekends. That alone is almost $10,000 a year.

 

You remind me a bit of my daughter who now looks back and "gets it!" ;)

[OPSoccermom]

Some have them. And you are clearly right, the kids should want to use the places available to them but lots of them don't. Over thanksgiving on carnival glory my then 16 yr old daughter would go to meet up at teen activities and the counselors would just say, sorry we aren't having it because not enough teens showed interest. They toss them out of the teen disco so it can become the disco for adults. We haven't been on rccl in years now, so I have no idea what it is they offer and won't be worried about it since my youngest will already be 18. Right now the thing she is looking forward to is trying a slot machine ;)

Exactly - because many don't take advantage of the facilities, they cancel events. It's hard for cruise lines to justify building bigger and better facilities when the ones they currently have aren't utilized.

[cruzinnluvinit]

I would think that the cruise lines consider themselves at more risk legally and in the public eye if a teenager were to get hurt/killed while on a cruise ship than if an adult were to have the same mishap.

For example, look at rape. If it were a 25 year old adult female versus a 15 year old it would be looked at much differently. The public would say the 25 year old might have been an active participant and not think much about it but there would be much discussion if a 15 year old were raped. The cruise line would be crucified for not taking appropriate measures to protect their underage passengers.

If all of the parents or guardians of the teens onboard would take responsibility for each and every one of them there would not be a need for an enforceable curfew. Too many parents are more worried about having fun and getting their vacation time in than worrying about what their children are doing. The same problem exists on land.

Parent can only be so dilligent. Kids will find a way to get into trouble. If you have a big enough room for the teens to stay with you then you could be able to control when they are back in the room. If they need to be in another room because you have more than one child then you unfortunately can't lock their door from the outside (fire code violation). I was shocked at what went on in my own house with me being feet away. My son opened up and told me why he was feeling so guilty. WHEW I'm glad he told me but was I naive or what?

 

I never snuck out of the house when I was young (I know I sound wierd) but I know my friends did. I lived in fear of the consequences and it kept me pretty much in line. Now kids don't have that fear. If you give your child a swat, someone will turn you in for abuse. I don't know what I would have gotten into if I didn't have the fear of punishment. I didn't get many spankings so you can guess I was pretty compliant. I don't know how parents today can MAKE their child do much they don't WANT to do.

 

Linda

[rsscaptain]

Parent can only be so dilligent. Kids will find a way to get into trouble. If you have a big enough room for the teens to stay with you then you could be able to control when they are back in the room. If they need to be in another room because you have more than one child then you unfortunately can't lock their door from the outside (fire code violation). I was shocked at what went on in my own house with me being feet away. My son opened up and told me why he was feeling so guilty. WHEW I'm glad he told me but was I naive or what?

 

I never snuck out of the house when I was young (I know I sound wierd) but I know my friends did. I lived in fear of the consequences and it kept me pretty much in line. Now kids don't have that fear. If you give your child a swat, someone will turn you in for abuse. I don't know what I would have gotten into if I didn't have the fear of punishment. I didn't get many spankings so you can guess I was pretty compliant. I don't know how parents today can MAKE their child do much they don't WANT to do.

 

Linda

 

You said it! Consequenses! When ours was 18 living at home she didn't think she needed a curfew. She was wrong she did! Why because we said so. LOL When she came home one too many nights after curfew, off came the license plates on her car! Didn't get them back for a week and she had to be driven to work. How embaressing! Wanna be grown up, act like it. In the real world there are consequences, so you better get used to it now. :)

[TMarie]

Most of us past a certain age are well aware of those costs as we have been there done that long ago and have now been there done that for our own kids! :D Yes, kids are very expensive, and school esspecially good ones are very expensive.

 

I just think that there are some kids out there who do work hard, and have great jobs and save. It's not so far from likely that good money, enough for a cruise could be saved.

 

One of my little friends worked as a busgirl on weekends and was such a little hustler that the waitstaff tipped her out really well. She made at least $200 a week just on weekends. That alone is almost $10,000 a year.

 

You remind me a bit of my daughter who now looks back and "gets it!" ;)

 

LOL my mom always laughs at me, because I try to tell my cousins who are all just now starting college as fresh faced 18 year olds. I figure since I am alot closer to their age that they would relate better to me than to the "adults" but they dont listen. My future BIL was trying to get his S/O in a conversation with me about college since we both will be attending the same college and she all but rolled her eyes....Its funny....i think i went being that....to hating that :rolleyes:

 

But, no one listens to the ones before them. They have to make their own mistakes....I guess thats why teen pregnancy is on the rise.

[cruzinnluvinit]

Just to back up the FACTS that I posted, here is a link to the 15-17 yr old teen compasses http://s204.photobucket.com/albums/bb196/cruisinmama06/Royal%20Caribean%20AO%20Compass/

 

Not all kids are running around the ship, many are taking advantage of what RCI has to offer. Many parents are also sitting in the outside booths of Johnny Rockets at 1AM waiting to pick up their kids at curfew. I know this as a FACT as I was waiting for my 16 yr old on the Mariner in June with other parents.

I stand corrected on the times of the activities. Thanks.

 

So let me get this right, teens want to be out past 1 AM and adults want that? Like the song says "it's a different world, not a different time"

 

Linda

[standby 06.30]

I think part of the reason that both Sally and I felt you were a teenager is because of the way you type your posts. Many teenagers, including my 16 yr old, come from the age of the text message. They don't capitalize or use punctuation thus making their sentences very hard to read.

I suppose that is because, I communicate, with my teenage relatives,in which ever way, it helps! you should try it ? Instead of the "get over it" attitude, that only will create a us and them mentality, that may cause unwanted friction,regards.

[linda_22003]

They have to make their own mistakes....I guess thats why teen pregnancy is on the rise.

 

Actually, a new report says that isn't true.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/worldlatest/story/0,,-6777516,00.html

[reallyitsmema]

I stand corrected on the times of the activities. Thanks.

 

So let me get this right, teens want to be out past 1 AM and adults want that? Like the song says "it's a different world, not a different time"

 

Linda

We set a curfew for our son before we boarded the ship. Since the activities that were available for him ended after that curfew, we had to adjust that time so he didn't miss out on things like the free arcade and "the Prom". I would have happily had our son in earlier if the ship sponsored activities ended earlier.

 

Was he running all over the ship? Not to our knowledge. Did we sneak a peek and make sure he was where he told us he was going to be? Absolutely! Do I think he is going to break the rules at one time or another? Absolutely!

 

There were a lot of kids participating in the teen activities on our sailing, I do realize this isn't always the case. We had more issues with the "tweens" running around than with the teens. If all parents would keep track of what is up with their kids, we would all be happier.

[cruzinnluvinit]

We set a curfew for our son before we boarded the ship. Since the activities that were available for him ended after that curfew, we had to adjust that time so he didn't miss out on things like the free arcade and "the Prom". I would have happily had our son in earlier if the ship sponsored activities ended earlier.

 

Was he running all over the ship? Not to our knowledge. Did we sneak a peek and make sure he was where he told us he was going to be? Absolutely! Do I think he is going to break the rules at one time or another? Absolutely!

 

There were a lot of kids participating in the teen activities on our sailing, I do realize this isn't always the case. We had more issues with the "tweens" running around than with the teens. If all parents would keep track of what is up with their kids, we would all be happier.

If all parents would keep track of what is up with their kids, we would all be happier.

 

That is easier said than done. I don't have a teen or tween now. I was constantly checking as to what they were up to but still missed SO MUCH that I had no idea. Some things take 3 mintues or less if you know what I mean.

 

I used to think, "why can't they control that child?" Then God gave me my son. I no longer think, as dilligent as I was, that I did anywhere near a perfect job. Open mind, insert reality.

 

Linda

[reallyitsmema]

If all parents would keep track of what is up with their kids, we would all be happier.

 

That is easier said than done. I don't have a teen or tween now. I was constantly checking as to what they were up to but still missed SO MUCH that I had no idea. Some things take 3 mintues or less if you know what I mean.

 

I used to think, "why can't they control that child?" Then God gave me my son. I no longer think, as dilligent as I was, that I did anywhere near a perfect job. Open mind, insert reality.

 

Linda

Our minds are very open and we realize we aren't doing a perfect job, that is why I said we know he will break the rules at one point or another. I know we don't see everything but there is no way I am going to have him attached to us 24 hours a day. We trust but verify. Any parent would be naive to think they have a perfect child. We are there in the good times and the bad. We reward for the good and punish for the bad.

[sheilauk]

That was sort of my point, though. Teens don't need to be up all hours of the night unsupervised, and I don't think it's realistic to expect RC to provide supervision for them 24 hours a day. I really doubt that there would be a high enough demand for activities at 2 or 3 am to make it worth their while to hire the extra staff to supervise such an area all night long. So the alternative is to set a limit. They chose 1 am as that limit, which seems pretty reasonable to me. There really aren't a large number of adults out and about beyond that time, either. They've usually closed down all but the casino and maybe one or two bars by that time.

 

But that is eaxactly the point!

Of course there won't be much demand for activities because once you tell the teenagers they can stay up all night with youth crew supervision, it ceases to be as atrractive to them. If you put a curfew on a teenager then they are likely to kick against it, it's genetically programmed into all teenagers to push the rules, but we found with our teenage boys that they would back in the cabin between 1am and 2am. You know it's surprising, but once you start trusting teenagers to make decisions, then 99.9% of them will make a good one.

[dc-snoopy]

The point is that the rules are instigated or enforced when enough people cause problems that require these types of rules. There are mature tweeners and there are immature older teens. I have seen 13-15 year olds that are very well behaved and completely out-of-control problem causing 17 and 18 year olds. The point is that all it takes is a small handful to cause problems and the ship *WILL* do whatever they have to for the greater good of the majority of the cruise population and sometimes that means curfews.

 

Unfortunately, that is life. Once you get out into the real world, you'll see repeated instances of this. If you work in a large office, it only takes one or two to break the "unwritten rules" or abuse privileges for everyone to lose those privileges. Like the people who flex their hours too much and "core hours" and instituted. Or people who don't pick up after their pets when they walk them to get doggie laws about where and when you can walk pets. Or people who abuse free services and suddenly services are stopped. It's a part of life.

 

When I started cruising in 2001, they used to not enforce the liquor rules nearly as strongly and would turn a blind eye for one or two bottles of booze stashed in luggage. Now, because a few stupid adults and kids have abused the rules, problems with inappropriate drunken behaviour and alcohol being served to minors they are much more strict about confiscating alcohol as it comes aboard.

 

As long as it keeps the trouble from teens down (and it does), the curfews will be enforced because a few teens cannot keep out of trouble.

[Onessa]

Just looking for some personal experiences here, anyone with a 17 y.o., what time do you set there curfew for if there not on a cruise, if there just hanging out in the town they live in, and what time do you set there curfew for on any cruise?

 

My nephew will turn 18YO in November (like you he will be a Freshman in college b/f he turns 18). He's living with us for the summer. He works two part-time jobs this summer including a second shift at a printing company - as such he gets off of work at Midnight. There is a 24-hour fast food restaurant near the plant - and he and one or more of his co-workers often stop after work for some food and some winding down time. He can stay out if he calls us (I'd rather get a call at 12:10am than wake up and find he's not home yet). Generally if I know where he is, he can stay out as long as he wants to - since he has another part-time job most days, he's never out past 1:00 or 1:30am. Sometimes they will bypass the restaurant and just go to someone's house and sit out on the deck. Neither he nor any of his work friends have cars (they all bike to work), and they are all pretty good kids. Being 100% responsible for your all your college costs makes him pretty responsible (his high school graduation gift was a gift certificate to his college's book store).

He's never had the opportunity to go on a cruise, but would probably just "deal" with a ship-imposed curfew. He's a competitive swimmer and is generally up at 6:00am training.

Just a side note - if you'd clean up your grammar a bit, your posts would be easier to read and/or taken more seriously by others. For example your use of "there" when you should be using "their" or "they're" is very distracting! It will also help in your college courses.:)

[alcheme]

Here, here! Or should I say . . . Their, They're! :D