I'm not sure I "get" formal night

[CruiseLiz]

Back to the original post...

 

I see where you (or your friend) is coming from Linda. For me, the point of formal night is just to feel special. Don't you think that people act a little different when they're dressed up? Even if nothing else is changed onboard for formal night, you're dressed up and so is everyone else - which gives the ship a classier ambiance for the night.

 

Also, it warrants mentioning that the cruise lines love formal night b/c people spend more money those evenings - tuxedo rental, pre-dinner cocktails, wine with dinner, formal photos...these things add up.

If/When they ever eliminate formal night, they'll also be eliminating this extra revenue.

[numbersix]

We've often been on NCL (on the Crown in 06) & have never seen slobs in the Dining Room..Last year we cruised on Oceania for the first time..The service was Far Superior to the service we've received on HAL..I never observed any fellow passengers who looked like "Slobs" with one exception on the last night....

 

 

We were away from HAL for about 10 years, cruising Princess and Celebrity. We returned recently for a 15-day "European Capitals" (Athens to Harwich) cruise on the Rotterdam. We saw PLENTY of slobs ( or so as not to offend slobs everywhere, perhaps I should say, "Slobbily-dressed people") in the Dining Room. Most, but not all, were members of a television crew on board shooting some kind of reality cooking show for Dutch television....ripped, faded jeans, shorts, t-shirts, innapropriate headwear (ballcaps et cetera. Unfortunately, other guests took that as their cue that it was, therefore, somehow, acceptable to dress like slobs, and began to, as well. After the first couple of nights, the damage was done, and the (very nice, but) hapless Dining Room manager had lost control of the situation. Needless to say, I was appalled. It was only after some discussions with the Dining Room management and the Guest Relations manager, that I found out that HAL had scrapped the "No jeans in the Dining Room" rule....but that, I suspect, is a whole other thread.

 

As to why I like formal nights....for me, they harken back to a day wear class, and even, perhaps, chivalry ruled the day ...where gentlemen were gentlemen, and ladies were ladies. And....

 

Now...all I know is that if I, by wearing a tuxedo, can get just a little bit of that...that "je ne sais quoi".....why...why would there be a man alive that wouldn't want to emulate that?? And what woman wouldn't want to be by his side?;)

[numbersix]

The first time we cruised on HAL my son dressed in a shirt and tie even though my husband and my father were in tuxes. He felt he wasn't dressed enough - he was 14.

Our next cruise on Princess, he and the friend he brought with elected to wear tux's. They felt over dressed but enjoyed all the teenage ladies wanting pictures taken with them.

I will always treasure the picture of all my guys in tuxe's

 

Your son seems to have already gained wisdom and poise beyond his young years.

 

I've always thought ( and I'm not, particularly, an elitist, but) that in just about any situation, if there's one guy with a jacket on and one without out, the guy in the jacket wins. If there's one guy with a suit on, and one guy without, the guy with the suit wins. Other things being equal, if there's one guy with cuff links on, and one without , the guy with the cufflinks wins. Finally, if there's one guy in a tux, and one without....well, you know who wins. Ooh...I can feel the heat already.

 

Before the flames start, I'd also say, that even though expensive (but remember, there's no sitting fee), some of the nicest family portraits we have were from formal nights on cruises...in fact we have a couple of black-and-white formal portraits on the wall in our foyer....very few people pass them without commenting most effusively.

[numbersix]

My Bond plays Blackjack! :D

 

While possessing neither the skill of 007, nor unlimited amounts of MI6 cash to lose, this James Bond avoids the gaming tables altogether, but prefers strolling the decks ( in a tuxedo, of course)!!:rolleyes:

[navybankerteacher]

NCL has been referred to a number of times - I do enjoy being casual (and find the Bermuda cruise to St. Georges worth repeating over and over); however, the free-style approach HAS indeed led to a dumbing-down of attire in the dining rooms: many baseball caps (some worn backwards in true idiot fashion), stained tee shirts, jeans, some muscle shirts (bits of a neighbor's hairy back peeping out does not stimulate one's appetite), overly tight tank tops over painted-on capris and the occasional remarkably short shorts --all do lend a distinctive air.

 

Yes, what others wear DOES have an effect on me. If I continue to choose NCL for their destination, then I am willing to live with their ambience; however, when I choose HAL for their advertised ambience, I believe it should be maintained.

[mmcipdn]

I've always thought ( and I'm not, particularly, an elitist, but) that in just about any situation, if there's one guy with a jacket on and one without out, the guy in the jacket wins. If there's one guy with a suit on, and one guy without, the guy with the suit wins. Other things being equal, if there's one guy with cuff links on, and one without , the guy with the cufflinks wins. Finally, if there's one guy in a tux, and one without....well, you know who wi

ns

 

What do we win?

[usha]

Whenever I see DH in his tuxedo, I always feel like

I'm out with "Bond, James Bond".:D

[pipedreams62]

There's this look

 

 

and then there's this look

[numbersix]

ns

 

What do we win?

 

 

Well, for one thing, check out what's on each of Cary Grant's arms!:cool:

[mmcipdn]

Well, for one thing, check out what's on each of Cary Grant's arms!:cool:

all right..tux for me..i guess i will have to decide which arm goes home (cabin) with me ,,,decisions..decisions..decisions...:confused: i mean which gal on which arm.. i hope both arms go home with me.

[teltrainer]

Whenever I see DH in his tuxedo, I always feel like

I'm out with "Bond, James Bond".:D

 

...Precisely why my husband agreed to my suggestion that he finally purchase a tux last month. He understands the benefits ;) I love being a Bond girl.

[dan40]

Well, for one thing, check out what's on each of Cary Grant's arms!:cool:

 

 

Sleeves???

[mmcipdn]

He understands the benefits I love being a Bond girl

 

u'mmm and what are the benefits?

[cruzincurt]

u'mmm and what are the benefits?

 

He gets to cash in his chips?

[babyher]

If I ever did want to pretend to be James Bond , it would have to be Roger Moore as James Bond.

 

DW can't stand Sean Connery after his infamous remark something along the lines of "a woman needs a smack every once in a while to keep her in line."

[luxurysailer]

<P>Since we are taking a special vacation on an elegant cruise ship, something the vast majority of people will never be able to do, and are being waited on hand and foot, why not do something out of the ordinary and really dress up?  My wife and I look forward to formal nights and do not consider them an imposition.</P>

<P> </P>

<P>Some people complain that they prefer to wear comfortable clothes.  Formal clothes do not have to be uncomfortable.  Just buy something that fits properly.</P>

<P> </P>

<P>Others complain about airline baggage limits as an excuse for not wanting to take formal clothes.  Unless something has changed in the past two months, airlines are still allowing each passenger on international flights to have two fifty pound bags.  On our recent cruise my wife took along two formal outfits, and I took along my tux with proper shoes.  We had only three packed bags between the two of us: one weighing 42 pounds, another 44 pounds, and another only 26 pounds.  And we had all the other clothes that we needed as well.  In short, I do not believe that airline baggage restrictions can legitimately be cited as a reason to do away with formal nights.  Even if we had been required to pay $25 for our third bag, so what?  That is a pittance compared to the cost of the cruise, excursions, drinks, etc.  </P>

[Cruising-along]

If I ever did want to pretend to be James Bond , it would have to be Roger Moore as James Bond.

 

DW can't stand Sean Connery after his infamous remark something along the lines of "a woman needs a smack every once in a while to keep her in line."

 

Your DW and I would get along great. I've never been able to stand Sean Connery either!

[OTRlady]

I admit I'm a lurker, but I finally had to put in my two cents.

 

DH and I "dress up" on formal nights and we don't really consider it to be an imposition. However, our idea of dressing up does not meet the standard for men's dress on formal night, because DH will not wear a jacket or tie.

 

Some posters claim that "uncomfortableness" with formal clothes is a matter of fit. That may be true, but we have never yet found a ready-made suit that both fits properly and is also comfortable. The primary reasons for this are long sleeves on the jacket and the fine wool material used in the pants. There are silk suits available, but none of the jackets come in his size or cut. Linen suits (and silk too) wrinkle as soon as he sits down, which I think looks worse than ever. Besides, they aren't "dark".

 

As for long sleeves, he feels claustrophobic and physically ill because of the trapped body heat when wearing a suit coat. DH does not own a shirt with long sleeves, although we have several dress shirts with short sleeves. The problem with them is that his proper shirt size has too small a neck size and even with extenders, he cannot close the top button without half choking. The tie is the only reason he would need to close the top button at all.

 

So, what we have done for formal night in the dining room for him is a pair of silk dress trousers, dress shoes, and a silk short sleeve sweater with a round neck. I still wear my long gown or cocktail dress, though I can no longer wear heels due to a foot problem. If I want to go to the show afterward, I usually stay in my formal outfit, but DH changes immediately after dinner. He doesn't go to most of the shows because they are too loud, and our experience has always been that the big production shows are scheduled on formal nights, so he doesn't feel he's missing anything there.

 

We don't attend the Captain's cocktail party or other specific events that have a dress code requiring a jacket and tie, but we feel that dinner in the dining room is one of his main opportunities to meet people on a cruise and we are entitled to eat there every night--even without a jacket and tie. As DH is totally blind, the Lido buffet really isn't very workable for us, and we have a health-related policy about never eating in our cabin. We never order room service at any hotel, either. (And while it's another whole thread, we wish other people wouldn't either because the dishes sitting outside the doors are a safety hazard for blind people.)

 

For the record, DH also does not own a pair of tennis shoes, a pair of jeans, or a baseball cap either, and we would not think of wearing such things to the dining room. He prefers to wear shorts during the day, but we "dress" for dinner in the dining room every night. We just dress a little nicer on formal night. This is the same formal outfit DH wore at our wedding, and other dress-up events. He does own an actual suit now, but the only time he wears it is when introducing the Governor at a bill-signing (yes, he's really done that) or other such event where he is required to attend and it is important that he look the part of an executive--and no eating will be involved, since he really can't swallow with the tie on.

 

Maybe we could solve these problems by spending some money to have a custom suit and shirt made, but we can't justify the expense of creating and taking care of such an object for the 1-2 times per year it might actually need to be worn--and certainly not for cruising.

 

Regarding baggage, the airlines we have available to us are now charging for ALL checked luggage. We only have three hands between us, and cannot take more than two total bags. Because we have a lot of equipment and not very many clothes, we often accidentally exceed the 50-lb limit by a pound or two. Adding a suit coat and tie would practically guarantee we would also have to pay the overweight baggage fee, now that airlines are enforcing it.

 

I looked into renting formal clothes once and found that they don't have anything in our sizes. Now with the extra fuel surcharges and other airline taxes and fees, we also have less to spend on board. It really is an imposition to specify that formal options for men only include a tux or a dark suit with tie.

 

Would I like to have James Bond on my arm at an event? Yes. But it's not going to happen, and I love him just the same. I don't care if other people don't love how he looks.

 

We don't want to see formal night go away, but we also don't think we're actually ruining anyone else's vacation by having a little different definition of "formal" for dinner.

 

P.S. We have never been on a ship that could make prime rib without turning it into roast beef by accident! I wouldn't know about the seafood or caviar, since I never eat any.

[cf_chuck]

I admit I'm a lurker, but I finally had to put in my two cents.

 

DH and I "dress up" on formal nights and we don't really consider it to be an imposition. However, our idea of dressing up does not meet the standard for men's dress on formal night, because DH will not wear a jacket or tie.

 

Some posters claim that "uncomfortableness" with formal clothes is a matter of fit. That may be true, but we have never yet found a ready-made suit that both fits properly and is also comfortable. The primary reasons for this are long sleeves on the jacket and the fine wool material used in the pants. There are silk suits available, but none of the jackets come in his size or cut. Linen suits (and silk too) wrinkle as soon as he sits down, which I think looks worse than ever. Besides, they aren't "dark".

 

As for long sleeves, he feels claustrophobic and physically ill because of the trapped body heat when wearing a suit coat. DH does not own a shirt with long sleeves, although we have several dress shirts with short sleeves. The problem with them is that his proper shirt size has too small a neck size and even with extenders, he cannot close the top button without half choking. The tie is the only reason he would need to close the top button at all.

 

So, what we have done for formal night in the dining room for him is a pair of silk dress trousers, dress shoes, and a silk short sleeve sweater with a round neck. I still wear my long gown or cocktail dress, though I can no longer wear heels due to a foot problem. If I want to go to the show afterward, I usually stay in my formal outfit, but DH changes immediately after dinner. He doesn't go to most of the shows because they are too loud, and our experience has always been that the big production shows are scheduled on formal nights, so he doesn't feel he's missing anything there.

 

We don't attend the Captain's cocktail party or other specific events that have a dress code requiring a jacket and tie, but we feel that dinner in the dining room is one of his main opportunities to meet people on a cruise and we are entitled to eat there every night--even without a jacket and tie. As DH is totally blind, the Lido buffet really isn't very workable for us, and we have a health-related policy about never eating in our cabin. We never order room service at any hotel, either. (And while it's another whole thread, we wish other people wouldn't either because the dishes sitting outside the doors are a safety hazard for blind people.)

 

For the record, DH also does not own a pair of tennis shoes, a pair of jeans, or a baseball cap either, and we would not think of wearing such things to the dining room. He prefers to wear shorts during the day, but we "dress" for dinner in the dining room every night. We just dress a little nicer on formal night. This is the same formal outfit DH wore at our wedding, and other dress-up events. He does own an actual suit now, but the only time he wears it is when introducing the Governor at a bill-signing (yes, he's really done that) or other such event where he is required to attend and it is important that he look the part of an executive--and no eating will be involved, since he really can't swallow with the tie on.

 

Maybe we could solve these problems by spending some money to have a custom suit and shirt made, but we can't justify the expense of creating and taking care of such an object for the 1-2 times per year it might actually need to be worn--and certainly not for cruising.

 

Regarding baggage, the airlines we have available to us are now charging for ALL checked luggage. We only have three hands between us, and cannot take more than two total bags. Because we have a lot of equipment and not very many clothes, we often accidentally exceed the 50-lb limit by a pound or two. Adding a suit coat and tie would practically guarantee we would also have to pay the overweight baggage fee, now that airlines are enforcing it.

 

I looked into renting formal clothes once and found that they don't have anything in our sizes. Now with the extra fuel surcharges and other airline taxes and fees, we also have less to spend on board. It really is an imposition to specify that formal options for men only include a tux or a dark suit with tie.

 

Would I like to have James Bond on my arm at an event? Yes. But it's not going to happen, and I love him just the same. I don't care if other people don't love how he looks.

 

We don't want to see formal night go away, but we also don't think we're actually ruining anyone else's vacation by having a little different definition of "formal" for dinner.

 

P.S. We have never been on a ship that could make prime rib without turning it into roast beef by accident! I wouldn't know about the seafood or caviar, since I never eat any.

 

Thanks for your two cents. Here's a penny change.

 

The bottom line is that you understand the requested standard, and for your own reasons, choose to ignore them. Your rationalizations are yours, but it seems that many others are able to comply with the requests. You may feel justified in making the choices you make, but I find it an act of hubris to expect others to support your choices, especially when many others choose to support the spirit of the request. I have no doubt that you dress better than some that meet the letter of the request, but using their slovenliness to justify your lack of compliance is simply an expression of selfishness, IMO. Given that there are venues where this is a non-issue, I fail to understand the insistence of some, yourself included, that expect to be accepted based on the substandard choices you make. It's not as if the minimum expectations of dress are a big secret, suddenly sprung on you unawares and taking you by surprise.

 

The requested standards are clear. You choose to ignore them. End of story.

[Boytjie]

Phew, that's a lot of issues... OK, I will jump in with a couple of observations and hopefully they are not seen as judgments.

 

Dress shirts are usually bought by neck size and sleeve length. For me neck size is the most important since I need to be able to button it to wear a tie when called for. Sleeve length is also important. That does sometimes affect the look of the rest of the shirt since the correct neck/sleeve size may end up being a shirt that is way too big in the body.

 

There are places that sell suit separates: pants and jackets. Recently I even saw it in Target. I have an issue with off-the-rack suits: when the jacket fits the pants would be way too big for me and tailoring can only be done so much before the whole thing gets ruined. Buying separates is an option.

 

As for food trays being left in the corridors: that's just bad. IIRC on our last cruise they may have sent out a note to everyone not to leave trays outside the door but to call room service to have it removed or leave it in the room. We had some rough seas and those suckers were moving around! And it's not a pretty site to look at someone's dirty dishes, and it is a danger to others.

[pipedreams62]

[chrisbd1]

NCL has been referred to a number of times - I do enjoy being casual (and find the Bermuda cruise to St. Georges worth repeating over and over); however, the free-style approach HAS indeed led to a dumbing-down of attire in the dining rooms: many baseball caps (some worn backwards in true idiot fashion), stained tee shirts, jeans, some muscle shirts (bits of a neighbor's hairy back peeping out does not stimulate one's appetite), overly tight tank tops over painted-on capris and the occasional remarkably short shorts --all do lend a distinctive air.

 

Yes, what others wear DOES have an effect on me. If I continue to choose NCL for their destination, then I am willing to live with their ambience; however, when I choose HAL for their advertised ambience, I believe it should be maintained.

 

Sorry to intrude on your thread but I have to say that I've never seen anyone dressed like this for dinner in 4 NCL cruises. I'm not saying that you haven't. I'm just saying that I have not. Many people dress up on the Dress Up or Not night.

[Alexat2]

I hate to threadjack, but having the chance, want to ask.....Alexat2, were you able to make the transfer from Kobe to the airport for your onward trip to Thailand? Jacksan1 and I (Asia board) correspond privately and were genuinely concerned. Inquiring minds..... Kate

 

I changed my flight to a 12:50 departure which was perfect (except for the whole 8 hours layover in Seoul - at least there's a transit hotel in the terminal). Used the transfer by bus/speedboat to KIX right from the cruise ship terminal (they handled all my luggage and everything - I highly recommend it) $25. I probably could have made the earlier one if I had known we were docking the night before...

 

Thanks for asking.

 

Lydia

[cf_chuck]

As for food trays being left in the corridors: that's just bad. IIRC on our last cruise they may have sent out a note to everyone not to leave trays outside the door but to call room service to have it removed or leave it in the room. We had some rough seas and those suckers were moving around! And it's not a pretty site to look at someone's dirty dishes, and it is a danger to others.

 

On most (if not all) trays that I have received from room service over the last 3 cruises, there has been a card asking for people to call room service for a pick-up and not leave the tray in the hall. Even under the best of conditions they are a hazzard when left in the hall. I can't imagine the situation when the rock and roll band starts playing.

[cf_chuck]

Are you sure it's dead? - I mean really dead, not playing opossum. Love the pics, BTW.