Always Angry?

[Leejnd4]

I really don't have anything to add to this little rant, but a quirky little observation.

 

Does anyone but me find it humorous that a thread about why are people angry has a bunch of people labeling members of the forum as all sorts of things, from keyboard cowboys, chronic complainers, almost trolls, cowards, snobby, cruiseline apologists, and a few other similar things in the first 50 or so posts. I can't wait til it gets to a few 100.

 

O, I lied, I do have one thing to actually add....

 

I think a lot of people think because someone doesn't agree with them that they are wrong or wrong headed, and therefore they must be angry.

 

Cheerio...:D

 

jc

 

Jc, I understand your point - but just please be aware that there are a number of us who have found ourselves the target of some pretty harsh personal attacks (including being called horrendous names and accused of serious character flaws) from some of these members that we've described. And this often seems to happen when we are having perfectly polite discussions about things that don't even impact these people - but they disagree with us, so they attack us.

 

I am always up for a lively discussion, even a debate, provided it remains within the bounds of civility - meaning, sticking to the TOPIC, and refraining from insulting the PEOPLE. Unfortunately, there are a few notorious members in here who appear to be utterly unable to do that.

 

An example: Some of us disagree with RCI's policies on alcohol, and choose to smuggle. That's a personal choice, and one that not every agrees with. However, we make this choice for ourselves, and we do not insist that anyone else do it, or even agree with it. Sometimes we want to discuss our methods for bringing alcohol on board...tips, products, etc. Inevitably, in any conversation about that, someone will barge into the discussion and start telling us that we're all alcoholics, cheapskates, scofflaws, bottom-feeders, and a number of other choice epithets. These are usually conversations that have no impact on these people - and yet they just can't seem to refrain from doing this, even though it has nothing whatsoever to do with what we're talking about. And this is just one example of the types of topics that draw these folks.

 

These are the people I've referred to as "message board cowboys". They do this unprovoked, and generally add nothing to the thread. I often think they do this for the sole purpose of getting these threads pulled, effectively ending our conversations...which results in our inability to have our conversations at all!

 

When I see this happen, I've taken to posting replies imploring everyone to ignore them and not take the bait - because that's usually what it is. Sadly, sometimes the insults are just too toxic, and people (understandbly) get upset and respond...and then, poof. Conversation over, "message board cowboy" wins.

 

I am writing about this because I hope at least some people will see this and begin to recognize when that's what's happening, and not take their bait. Although I fully acknowledge that I have been just as guilty of taking the bait myself, when I've been personally attacked. Hey, the fact is, it just doesn't feel good to be the target of insults and character assassinations, ya know?

[KKeeganS]

There are always some people who have condescending, rude, or even cruel attitudes toward others on the board. When I come across someone who really crosses the line, I either report the post and have it taken down, or, for repeat offenders, I go into their profile and add them to my ignore list. That way, I don't have to read their garbage, and I don't have to struggle with the natural inclination to respond and tell them I think they are being "donkeys". I think responses, positive or negative, fuel these people to carry on with the negativity.

 

Perhaps I am missing great insight from these folks by blocking out all their posts...but somehow, I doubt it.

[whyrlygig]

There are always some people who have condescending, rude, or even cruel attitudes toward others on the board. When I come across someone who really crosses the line, I either report the post and have it taken down, or, for repeat offenders, I go into their profile and add them to my ignore list. That way, I don't have to read their garbage, and I don't have to struggle with the natural inclination to respond and tell them I think they are being "donkeys". I think responses, positive or negative, fuel these people to carry on with the negativity.

 

Perhaps I am missing great insight from these folks by blocking out all their posts...but somehow, I doubt it.

 

I recently started using the "ignore" list. It does help to avoid seeing so much of the gargage.

[xpcdoojk]

Gosh, I think everyone who has ever posted in an internet forum any opinion that veers outside of a completely vanilla opinion more than one time has been attacked. I have had personal stalkers from this forum. I think unprovoked personal attacks are very sad, and the people who do that or stalk members is sad and pathetic, but seriously, you can't expect to share opinions that are even slightly controversial without earning fans and those who disagree who often become "enemies". I think the biggest problem with most folks who tend to get outraged and those that "think" they are being attacked is that they lack a sense of humor.

 

There are moments when I read something blatantly wrong or mean and I get angry, fortunately, for me it usually lasts about 10 seconds.

 

jc

[melbur]

I think this thread was long overdue. I am a frequent cruiser, and use this board for info on destinations, guides, etc. I love the Roll Call area, where I meet my fellow cruisers on specific sailings, and I try to post when I feel I have relevant info to share or ask. But, lately, I hear the same handful of CC'ers get on and rant, apologize, humiliate and embarass. When I realized there was an "ignore" opportunity, I went through the board to see if I could do this. What I ended up finding out was this handful of people are on the boards from early in the morning til late at night, with obviously nothing else to do with their lives. They post on every thread they can, and do this for hours at a time. Once I discovered that (and stopped laughing) I started to understand the "why" of all the negativity.

[rclcruzer]

Jc, I understand your point - but just please be aware that there are a number of us who have found ourselves the target of some pretty harsh personal attacks (including being called horrendous names and accused of serious character flaws) from some of these members that we've described. And this often seems to happen when we are having perfectly polite discussions about things that don't even impact these people - but they disagree with us, so they attack us.

 

I am always up for a lively discussion, even a debate, provided it remains within the bounds of civility - meaning, sticking to the TOPIC, and refraining from insulting the PEOPLE. Unfortunately, there are a few notorious members in here who appear to be utterly unable to do that.

 

An example: Some of us disagree with RCI's policies on alcohol, and choose to smuggle. That's a personal choice, and one that not every agrees with. However, we make this choice for ourselves, and we do not insist that anyone else do it, or even agree with it. Sometimes we want to discuss our methods for bringing alcohol on board...tips, products, etc. Inevitably, in any conversation about that, someone will barge into the discussion and start telling us that we're all alcoholics, cheapskates, scofflaws, bottom-feeders, and a number of other choice epithets. These are usually conversations that have no impact on these people - and yet they just can't seem to refrain from doing this, even though it has nothing whatsoever to do with what we're talking about. And this is just one example of the types of topics that draw these folks.

 

These are the people I've referred to as "message board cowboys". They do this unprovoked, and generally add nothing to the thread. I often think they do this for the sole purpose of getting these threads pulled, effectively ending our conversations...which results in our inability to have our conversations at all!

 

When I see this happen, I've taken to posting replies imploring everyone to ignore them and not take the bait - because that's usually what it is. Sadly, sometimes the insults are just too toxic, and people (understandbly) get upset and respond...and then, poof. Conversation over, "message board cowboy" wins.

 

I am writing about this because I hope at least some people will see this and begin to recognize when that's what's happening, and not take their bait. Although I fully acknowledge that I have been just as guilty of taking the bait myself, when I've been personally attacked. Hey, the fact is, it just doesn't feel good to be the target of insults and character assassinations, ya know?

I totally agree with you....great post;)

[Shipyard Cruiser]

I really don't have anything to add to this little rant, but a quirky little observation.

 

Does anyone but me find it humorous that a thread about why are people angry has a bunch of people labeling members of the forum as all sorts of things, from keyboard cowboys, chronic complainers, almost trolls, cowards, snobby, cruiseline apologists, and a few other similar things in the first 50 or so posts. I can't wait til it gets to a few 100.

 

O, I lied, I do have one thing to actually add....

 

I think a lot of people think because someone doesn't agree with them that they are wrong or wrong headed, and therefore they must be angry.

 

Cheerio...:D

 

jc

 

So do you think there are such folks as "keyboard cowboys, chronic complainers, almost trolls, cowards, snobby and cruiseline apologists" around the RCI boards?

 

What would you call them if anything?

[Darkwolfe]

There's always going to be someone who has to drag people down into the mud for whatever reason they can think of. Honestly, I think that's it just a bad part of human nature that these poor folks haven't figured out how to overcome.

 

Admittedly, I don't usually manage to avoid making some comment on those threads myself, but I much prefer humor in disagreements over name calling so I tend to drop in some goofy dead horse or troll graphic and go from there. (LeeAnn can attest to that! LOL)

 

As for people enjoying their cruises, I haven't heard (or had) any real complaints on the two I have been on so far.

 

Yes, I know my post count is up quite a ways given that I've only been out twice, but I spend a lot of time on here learning and researching. But I'm also a noisy guy in person too, so a lot of my posts are just quips for fun to pass the time. (Work gets real slow after 5pm most nights) Still, what I have learned on those two trips has been immense and someone who hasn't gone out at all, may find it useful.

 

I have a lot more to learn and way more places to visit than I can even count. What wonderful adventures to come!

[Host Kewlguy]

I agree with JC. I enjoy a lively debate. I really don't see all these personal attacks I'm reading about. I feel it's being overblown. If someone violates the community guidelines that's what the triangle is for. Or simply use your "ignore list" if someone's opinions offend you. This web site would get awfully boring if everyone agreed with each other.

[Darkwolfe]

I agree with JC. I enjoy a lively debate. I really don't see all these personal attacks I'm reading about. I feel it's being overblown. If someone violates the community guidelines that's what the triangle is for. Or simply use your "ignore list" if someone's opinions offend you. This web site would get awfully boring if everyone agreed with each other.

 

 

Ain't that the truth! :D

[Leejnd4]

I agree with JC. I enjoy a lively debate. I really don't see all these personal attacks I'm reading about. I feel it's being overblown. If someone violates the community guidelines that's what the triangle is for. Or simply use your "ignore list" if someone's opinions offend you. This web site would get awfully boring if everyone agreed with each other.

 

There's a very good reason why you don't see all these personal attacks we're talking about. That's because most of them, and certainly the worst ones, are no longer here. They've either been taken out (often because we've used the little triangle), or the entire thread went poof.

 

But trust me that this is not overblown. I have been the target of many of them myself. I was once called a bottom feeder, and told that I am a cheapskate scumbag stealing money directly out of the wallets of hard-working TA's, simply because I prefer to shop around for the best OBC before I book a cruise, and was helping new cruisers to understand how OBC's work. It's hard to have a sense of humor when someone calls you things like that.

 

I enjoy talking about cruising, and I feel that I have learned a few things in my years of cruises. I like to share what I've learned with newbies, as I continue to learn new things myself. But it is that *type* of negative poster who can severely impact our enjoyment, and the ultimate usefulness, of this site.

 

I have tried the "ignore" list, but then found out later that I "ignored" a post that was a direct attack on me, saying things that were flat-out false. I have met and cruised with many of the members on this board, and I simply will not allow someone to publicly besmirch my name without defending myself.

[Leejnd4]

 

Admittedly, I don't usually manage to avoid making some comment on those threads myself, but I much prefer humor in disagreements over name calling so I tend to drop in some goofy dead horse or troll graphic and go from there. (LeeAnn can attest to that! LOL)

 

And I always SO enjoy your humorous quips and graphics! Sometimes we all need to be reminded to lighten up. :D

[Host Kewlguy]

There's a very good reason why you don't see all these personal attacks we're talking about. That's because most of them, and certainly the worst ones, are no longer here. They've either been taken out (often because we've used the little triangle), or the entire thread went poof.

 

But trust me that this is not overblown. I have been the target of many of them myself. I was once called a bottom feeder, and told that I am a cheapskate scumbag stealing money directly out of the wallets of hard-working TA's, simply because I prefer to shop around for the best OBC before I book a cruise, and was helping new cruisers to understand how OBC's work. It's hard to have a sense of humor when someone calls you things like that.

 

I enjoy talking about cruising, and I feel that I have learned a few things in my years of cruises. I like to share what I've learned with newbies, as I continue to learn new things myself. But it is that *type* of negative poster who can severely impact our enjoyment, and the ultimate usefulness, of this site.

 

I have tried the "ignore" list, but then found out later that I "ignored" a post that was a direct attack on me, saying things that were flat-out false. I have met and cruised with many of the members on this board, and I simply will not allow someone to publicly besmirch my name without defending myself.

 

I understand what you're saying and when that type of talk takes place it's totally uncalled for and the offender should be punished. No doubt about it. Name calling is never acceptable and I personally find it detestable. There's a big difference between a lively debate and a personal attack. Of course my definition of a personal attack may differ from others. Although I'm opinionated and not afraid to voice my opinion I always try to do it in a respectable way.

[Dremac373]

I agree with JC. I enjoy a lively debate. I really don't see all these personal attacks I'm reading about. I feel it's being overblown. If someone violates the community guidelines that's what the triangle is for. Or simply use your "ignore list" if someone's opinions offend you. This web site would get awfully boring if everyone agreed with each other.

 

We all can pretty much agree that a good debate here and there is great for a forum but I am sure that if you went into any "Formal Night" or Alcohol Smuggling" thread you will find at least 3-5 replies where some there is called low class, classless or even tasteless just to name a few that I HAVE SEEN in my short time here. Yeah it may be boring if every one agreed with each other but some threads are started as a means to get suggestions and ideas not to incite a cyber riots :o

[Tranquil Waters]

While I do understand that people posting on this thread think that they are calling attention to a problem, the reality is that the number of posts to "angry threads/posts" and the "view" count to these same threads is quite telling. Those are the most active and most viewed threads on CC. Someone must like them..... :o :p :D

[cruiserbryce]

while they are the threadas that do rec ieve the most responses, I would say that it is rare that people are so much sharing their experiences as they are disputing the fact that things are really as bad as OP has made it out to be

[Leejnd4]

While I do understand that people posting on this thread think that they are calling attention to a problem, the reality is that the number of posts to "angry threads/posts" and the "view" count to these same threads is quite telling. Those are the most active and most viewed threads on CC. Someone must like them..... :o :p :D

 

Kinda reminds me of the "looki-loo" phenomenon you see when there's an accident on the highway, and traffic backs up for miles so everyone can view the carnage. ;)

 

I'm sure it's entertaining for the looki-loo's, but it's not always so much fun when you are the victim, huh?

[Tranquil Waters]

Kinda reminds me of the "looki-loo" phenomenon you see when there's an accident on the highway, and traffic backs up for miles so everyone can view the carnage. ;)

 

I'm sure it's entertaining for the looki-loo's, but it's not always so much fun when you are the victim, huh?

 

No body ever said that human nature was pretty..... :D

 

As for being the victim, I guess I just don't take internet boards that seriously. Everyone could just jump all over what I just posted - and I would just shake my head and laugh. I don't know most of the people here and just don't give them the power to hurt me. Only my friends and people I care about can really hurt me.

[Leejnd4]

No body ever said that human nature was pretty..... :D

 

As for being the victim, I guess I just don't take internet boards that seriously. Everyone could just jump all over what I just posted - and I would just shake my head and laugh. I don't know most of the people here and just don't give them the power to hurt me. Only my friends and people I care about can really hurt me.

 

You are absolutely correct, and for the most part I don't let it get to me either. But I DO know a number of people on this board, and there have been several times when things that certain toxic members posted really did upset me. Fortunately I now know who the worst offenders are and recognize them for who and what they are...and I mostly just feel pity for them (after I've had a good laugh at their antics!).

[Darkwolfe]

And I always SO enjoy your humorous quips and graphics! Sometimes we all need to be reminded to lighten up. :D

 

[xpcdoojk]

So do you think there are such folks as "keyboard cowboys, chronic complainers, almost trolls, cowards, snobby and cruiseline apologists" around the RCI boards?

 

What would you call them if anything?

 

I don't know, CVBart, what do you call yourself?:confused:

 

jc

[Cruiser Forever]

Weeellllll.....my concern with the above statement is that it seems to invalidate ANY complain that anyone has with their cruise...and I just don't think that's entirely fair. Granted, we all know those people who have to nitpick and complain unreasonably, but there ARE sometimes people with valid issues and complaints.

 

What bothers me is when people who DO have a valid issue get attacked by all those afore-mentioned "cruise line apologists", sometimes like a hoard of voracious piranhas. Not EVERY complain is invalid. The fact is, we pay a pretty large amount of money for our cruises, and we have a right to have some basic expectations met. I'm not saying that we can expect every meal to be gourmet, or every moment to be superlative. But we SHOULD be able to expect that we will have a clean cabin, a working bathroom, and not get charged for things we didn't purchase (to give some examples of valid complaints).

 

I can't count the number of times I've seen people come on here and post completely valid complaints, and watched them get torn to pieces and called liars (and MUCH worse). The reality is that I WANT to hear about these types of issues. I WANT to know when a cruiser has had a bad experience, so that I can be a better-educated consumer. It might help steer me away from a particular ship, or port, or excursion...or provide me with some knowledge to help me avoid the same fate.

 

Unforunately, the cruise line apologists often drive these people completely off the boards. Hey, nobody wants to have their basic character called into question, especially when they have done nothing to deserve it other than report something that happened to them...to people who ostensibly would WANT TO KNOW.

 

Yes, I agree that we should all be grateful that we can cruise. But that doesn't mean that I should just happily accept poor service, or a bad product. I have a right to have a reasonable expectation that I will get what I paid for...and if I don't, I would hope that other cruisers would want to know about it.

 

 

Leejnd4, I agree with you. A person cruising or any traveler for that matter deserves a clean cabin/room with a working toliet. Clean linen and towels. That has to be a must. A traveler deserves a tasty meal with excellent service. I agree that the crew should be helpful and pleasing to the traveler. What I am trying to say is that there are people who are never happy. If they want a Four Seasons and 5 star dining then go to the Four Seasons or try a more upscale cruiseline. If you know RCI doesn't cater to that 5 star rating don't cruise on RCI. I am saying that there are people who will find fault with the smallest of problems. My point and what I am trying to say is that some posters bash RCI and yet still return. Why? If you don't like something speak up and tell a person in charge. If you don't like a service then at the end of the cruise the tip should be less than what you were going to give. I do agree everyone deserves a wonderful, safe and memorable vacation.

[bjenkins322]

That's so funny because I think the same thing about these people. I have seen posts from certain people on this board where the posts exceed 10,000 and they have only been on < 10 cruises, but they "know it all". I am going on my 20th cruise next month, and I certainly don't know it all yet and probably never will!;) You are so correct in saying their cruises mostly consist of cruising this board.:D

 

I'm going on my 10th cruise in a couple weeks and "I know it all", well at least all that I really need to know. I know that cruising is fantastic and the most relaxing vacation there can be, or that you can be as busy as all hell if that is what you want. It's what YOU make it. Don't sweat the small stuff.

[Shipyard Cruiser]

I don't know, CVBart, what do you call yourself?:confused:

 

jc

 

 

?????

[nednrom]

Great question! A good answer will be difficult to provide, however.

 

I think it is just the general tenor of chat boards and the pride of "I know it all better than you do" but only in their own mind.

 

Too bad it happens on a board that talks about something so delightfully fun.

 

I'm not sure that it's the general tenor of the chat boards ... it seems to be the general tenor of our society these days - one cannot disagree or like something else or one is wrong. I see it every day.