Aquaphobic husband!

[phoebedog]

There must be one thing on the ship he will like a lot

 

 

There is: the buffet:)

[phoebedog]

so you know how you feel when you fly? that's how HE feels when confronted with the possibility of sailing. nobody MAKES you fly, you suck it up and you get on the plane.

 

if he cannot or will not do the same( for whatever reason) then let it go

 

As I said before, HE wants to do it, it's not me making him. He asked me to post this thread.:)

[phoebedog]

While the cross-channel ferries are fairly well regulated and have had a great safety record, overall ferries are much more dangerous than cruise ships. That being said, I wouldn't want to scare him away from ferries.

 

There are many things you could say to reassure him, but others have said it best that a phobia is not rational in the first place, so rational arguments are not likely to help much at all.

 

You might try to talk to someone who does a program for people afraid to fly, and see if they can tell you the steps to take to build up to a short cruise that hopefully stays close to land at all times. I can tell you that he would feel better understanding a modern lifeboat and how safe they are. When all buttoned up, some of them can literally roll over and they will right themselves. Now where you would get such a detailed run through is beyond me.

 

There are some cruises that go London to London and sail around the British Isles, though they might be too long for a first try. These will be close to land at all times, though you are not likely to be in sight of land at all times -- there is a difference.

 

I actually teach a course on cruise ship accidents, but the bottom line is that the accidents, rare as they are, have generally lead to major changes in safety regulations. The Titanic led to the first International Convention for Safety of Life at Sea (SOLAS) which has been amended and updated over the years, often as a result of some sort of accident. Modern bridge equipment automatically controls the ship, and virtually instantly calculates any potential dangers from other ships in the area. Unfortunately, it is difficult to explain the Costa Concordia. It was, without a doubt, the worst instance of gross malfeasance imaginable.

 

Hello,

Many thanks for this great post. We have found it very useful:):)

[sparks1093]

As I said before, HE wants to do it, it's not me making him. He asked me to post this thread.:)

 

A lot of people don't read past the first post so they will miss that you've said this before.

[lady_cruiser]

OOf that's a bit serious! He is enjoying reading all these responses himself! He would love to come and was hoping for tips from anyone who had the same fear before their first cruise.:)

Ask him to try a shorter cruise close to home. My sister is deathly afraid of water due to almost drowning when she was six or seven. She is now sixty-five. I convinced her to try a cruise promising her that we would not go to a beach, stay away from the railings, etc.

 

And to be on the safe side I booked our first cruise with a local radio station so there would be plenty of people cruise she already knew on the cruise ship. I also had our cousins come with us. We're in Louisiana and they live in Arizonia so it was like a mini family reunion. This way we wouldn't be on our first cruise with no idea of what to do, what to expect and would have plenty of activites to keep us busy throughout the week.

 

After that first cruise she was hooked. This January we are going on our fourteenth cruise.

 

Is it possible to book a cruise closer to home with friends and relatives so he would have plenty of moral support around him?

[phoebedog]

Ask him to try a shorter cruise close to home. My sister is deathly afraid of water due to almost drowning when she was six or seven. She is now sixty-five. I convinced her to try a cruise promising her that we would not go to a beach, stay away from the railings, etc.

 

And to be on the safe side I booked our first cruise with a local radio station so there would be plenty of people cruise she already knew on the cruise ship. I also had our cousins come with us. We're in Louisiana and they live in Arizonia so it was like a mini family reunion. This way we wouldn't be on our first cruise with no idea of what to do, what to expect and would have plenty of activites to keep us busy throughout the week.

 

After that first cruise she was hooked. This January we are going on our fourteenth cruise.

 

Is it possible to book a cruise closer to home with friends and relatives so he would have plenty of moral support around him?

 

 

Thank you for sharing that lovely story. I just know know he will love it once he has done it. He never wanted to holiday abroad when I met him, he tried it, and now he likes to go 3 times a year!!

The last cruise I booked was with a family group of 7, but he still panicked at the last minute I'm afraid.

My sister was on her cruise this year and she was very nervous. A week after our return, she booked for next year (we love Holland America!!).

Thanks again:)

[Happy ks]

It took my husband 13 years to convince me to go on our first cruise. I wasn't so much afraid as I was not interested at that time.

 

Then Disney built a ship and since I'm a big Disney fan we booked immediately, before the ship was even built! Fast forward 14 years and we just went on cruise #24, all planned by me.

 

My initial fear about taking our kids (they were 6 and 9 on the first cruise) was falling over the rails. We took a day trip to Queen Mary in Long Beach and I saw how high the railings were, that you had to make a big effort to get over them to fall. Neither of our kids were climbers, so my fears were unfounded. They no longer cruise with us since they are grown and don't want to hang out with mom & dad, we save big $$ this way ;)

 

I wish you luck in the future and I know once he gets onboard, he will be the one booking cruises for the 2 of you in the future :)

[Langley Cruisers]

As I said before, HE wants to do it, it's not me making him. He asked me to post this thread.:)

 

Just to be fair to those responding to you, you didn't mention this until well into the thread. It made a difference in the replies you got, IMO. :)

[phoebedog]

It took my husband 13 years to convince me to go on our first cruise. I wasn't so much afraid as I was not interested at that time.

 

Then Disney built a ship and since I'm a big Disney fan we booked immediately, before the ship was even built! Fast forward 14 years and we just went on cruise #24, all planned by me.

 

My initial fear about taking our kids (they were 6 and 9 on the first cruise) was falling over the rails. We took a day trip to Queen Mary in Long Beach and I saw how high the railings were, that you had to make a big effort to get over them to fall. Neither of our kids were climbers, so my fears were unfounded. They no longer cruise with us since they are grown and don't want to hang out with mom & dad, we save big $$ this way ;)

 

I wish you luck in the future and I know once he gets onboard, he will be the one booking cruises for the 2 of you in the future :)

 

Thank you, that would indeed be wonderful.

Today he mentioned trying the 2 night cruise, unprompted!!:)

[skinslvr26]

Hello,

I am a happy Holland America cruiser but my husband keeps backing out at the last minute. He is happy to book, but as the sail date approaches he gets more and more stressed, then changes his mind. This year he left it until the day before to decide he wouldn't cruise, so I couldn't even take someone in his place. What a waste!!!

Has anyone successfully rehabilitated a nervous cruiser? :confused:

 

 

I had the same fear !!!! Im a 32 yr old male and when i was 12 My mother and I almost drowned because she was trying to teach me how to swim... Which to this day i cant.But Anyway my wife and 3 yr old son really wanted to go on a big boat and they wouldnt go without daddy.. So they begged me and i finally Went April 10-17 2011 on the Conquest... At frist it was like what the He*l am i doing then after we started doing things it started to Wane and i started to enjoy myself... Anyway we just completed are 2 crusie in 2 years April 22-29 on the Glory and have another booked for May 5 2013... I thank once he goes and gets his mind busy with other things it will go away like mine did and after the 1st one it gets easier or atleast it did for me.:D

[phoebedog]

I had the same fear !!!! Im a 32 yr old male and when i was 12 My mother and I almost drowned because she was trying to teach me how to swim... Which to this day i cant.But Anyway my wife and 3 yr old son really wanted to go on a big boat and they wouldnt go without daddy.. So they begged me and i finally Went April 10-17 2011 on the Conquest... At frist it was like what the He*l am i doing then after we started doing things it started to Wane and i started to enjoy myself... Anyway we just completed are 2 crusie in 2 years April 22-29 on the Glory and have another booked for May 5 2013... I thank once he goes and gets his mind busy with other things it will go away like mine did and after the 1st one it gets easier or atleast it did for me.:D

 

Thank you soooo much from both of us. This is exactly what he wanted to see (especially as it comes from a man:rolleyes:)

I know he will love sense of freedom I always feel when on deck and, more importantly the food.

Thanks again for taking the time to reply, really appreciated.:):)

[Sharra]

My bf isn't so much scared as paranoid and convinced if it can happen it will when he's on the ship. I've finally convinced him to hit his first cruise this coming January, He keeps saying he's not going in the ocean cause a jelly fish or shark will get him with his luck.

My plan is to just dope him up the night before in the hotel so he gets a good nights sleep and shove him on the ship lol. Since we are flying and there is a lot of non returnable money on the line it will probably work out.

[Laughing Angel]

phoebedog, I hope that you and your husband are able to work out a way to cruise together. It's such an amazing way to relax and escape--there are so many reasons why many of us on CC love it so much. :)

 

If your husband is truly determined to go on a cruise with you, you might want to look into cognitive behavior therapy. It includes visualization, breathing exercises, and various ways of facing your fears. Many people have tried this and had great success conquering their phobias. Perhaps it might be worth looking into?

 

In the meantime, I hope that eventually you will both be able to enjoy all of the fun activities a cruise has to offer (and yes, I also love that sense of freedom while up on deck--and the food!).

 

Good luck! :D

[Cruisin' Chick]

I'm a bit of a hydrophobe -- several attempts to learn to swim, and I still refuse to stay under long enough without freaking out. But I haven't let that stop me from getting on boats and ships. When I first started dating my hubby, he had already been on his first cruise. So after it looked like we were going to be together for at least a while, he suggested I try an one-day cruise. We did a San Diego-Ensenada-San Diego cruise that was basically a gamblers' special -- went out far enough so passengers can gamble, and get off at Ensenada for a few hours if they want. I managed to be okay so we booked a seven day cruise. Since then, every vacation over a couple days, except for our honeymoon, involved a cruise. We haven't had a ship mishap at all (only problems more involved hay fever in some of the ports).

 

Maybe you can find out how many cruise ships normally are sailing every day of the year. Point out that rarely are there any problems with those ships. Much safer than going on a long road trip.

 

I don't feel any panic about going on a cruise, but I do when I'm on a plane.

 

There are special programs to help those afraid to fly. Maybe there's one in your area for those afraid to go on a cruise.

 

But unless he takes one of those or goes through one-on-one therapy, maybe you can just go with a friend or family member. Many people go separately from their significant other for various reasons. Make sure someone takes plenty of photos of you having fun. If he wants to work on this, maybe he will. But don't book a cruise with the thought he'll go as he keeps backing out -- until he really wants to go.

[phoebedog]

My bf isn't so much scared as paranoid and convinced if it can happen it will when he's on the ship. I've finally convinced him to hit his first cruise this coming January, He keeps saying he's not going in the ocean cause a jelly fish or shark will get him with his luck.

My plan is to just dope him up the night before in the hotel so he gets a good nights sleep and shove him on the ship lol. Since we are flying and there is a lot of non returnable money on the line it will probably work out.

 

Hope it works out well, do let me know. My other half has the "if it's going to happen it will happen to me" outlook on life!!:)

[phoebedog]

phoebedog, I hope that you and your husband are able to work out a way to cruise together. It's such an amazing way to relax and escape--there are so many reasons why many of us on CC love it so much. :)

 

If your husband is truly determined to go on a cruise with you, you might want to look into cognitive behavior therapy. It includes visualization, breathing exercises, and various ways of facing your fears. Many people have tried this and had great success conquering their phobias. Perhaps it might be worth looking into?

 

In the meantime, I hope that eventually you will both be able to enjoy all of the fun activities a cruise has to offer (and yes, I also love that sense of freedom while up on deck--and the food!).

 

Good luck! :D

 

Thank you for your kind words:)

[phoebedog]

I'm a bit of a hydrophobe -- several attempts to learn to swim' date=' and I still refuse to stay under long enough without freaking out. But I haven't let that stop me from getting on boats and ships. When I first started dating my hubby, he had already been on his first cruise. So after it looked like we were going to be together for at least a while, he suggested I try an one-day cruise. We did a San Diego-Ensenada-San Diego cruise that was basically a gamblers' special -- went out far enough so passengers can gamble, and get off at Ensenada for a few hours if they want. I managed to be okay so we booked a seven day cruise. Since then, every vacation over a couple days, except for our honeymoon, involved a cruise. We haven't had a ship mishap at all (only problems more involved hay fever in some of the ports).

 

Maybe you can find out how many cruise ships normally are sailing every day of the year. Point out that rarely are there any problems with those ships. Much safer than going on a long road trip.

 

I don't feel any panic about going on a cruise, but I do when I'm on a plane.

 

There are special programs to help those afraid to fly. Maybe there's one in your area for those afraid to go on a cruise.

 

But unless he takes one of those or goes through one-on-one therapy, maybe you can just go with a friend or family member. Many people go separately from their significant other for various reasons. Make sure someone takes plenty of photos of you having fun. If he wants to work on this, maybe he will. But don't book a cruise with the thought he'll go as he keeps backing out -- until he really wants to go.[/quote']

 

Thank you for this post, he is reading them all and taking in everyone's advice. He is determind to go as he knows it's an irrational fear and wants to conquer it soon!:)