.......idle jottings

[abenaki]

Obviously someone closed the door on Ho, as he was yammering on for so long....

[kathyanddanny]

Arrive at block of ghastly concrete buildings having driven past the hotel Hum labelled "Pschittolla" (the "p" is silent) which one or two SD guests said they found "delightful in a Caribbean kinda way" !

Canadians, what do you expect ? Hum throws this line out there cause she probably does'nt read this drivel any more.

Arrive at hotel.

 

Ho Hum! Qui Moi!?...HA! Are you still going on about that sweet old school Caribbean no tell, motel with the cute but loud Roosters?...it's obvious you just don't know how to travel yet!...hehehe...stick with us Canadians! We'll show you how to live on the edge!

 

BTW, thank you for the wealth of information on Ireland! Sounds terrific! Will try as much as possible based on your advice....although, since we differ on what hotels to stay at, do you also have any schitolas to reccomend!? Haha!

Kathyx

[Jim Avery]

Secret message for Blondie......Dahrling, your camera was seen used several times for group photos, usually taken by your accomplices (crew). Would you be able to encode them to me as soon as decorum allows? I do believe I gave you my custom printed, 24K gold embossed on veal skin business card whilst in the bar one evening. Thank you love, kiss-kiss.:eek::D

[ho-hum]

Verbose drivel as requested by Commander Courageous and appreciated by the wonderful Abenaki.

And yes it was written quite a while ago (at the start of this trip).

 

 

Enter the "cell"......the noise of a loud disco greets us !!!!

Call gormless front desk man who actually answers phone and denies any disco is happening.

Told you he was gormless. Yes it is offensive ....... to gormless people !!!

He makes gormless people look ....well, err smart.

Well send someone to check Hum begs.

A security guard arrives (the puniest security guard Hum has ever seen......if it were between him and a fly, Hum would back the fly even tho' the fly is out of shape, smokes, drinks and had let itself go) who also doubles as maintenance. Then another, then another enquiring about a blocked toilet.

"You sure, you dont have a block toilet" he asks for the third time.

Hum is tired and advises:

"Darling dont you think Hum would have bloody well noticed if he was ankle deep in effluent (Hum used the colloquial term...nay the Universal term but if Hum uses the term, Host Dan may have aperplexy and ban Hum for life......again !) It's not exactly something you would overlook now is it ? Oh whats that wet brown stuff all around my ankles ? Dunno"

Now Hum is not sure what part of the tirade upset him most. Certainly the potential greeting was up there. In moments of exasperation Hum uses the appellation "darling" cos it is usually "she who must be obeyed" where it is often adopted.

 

Well finally They all agree it is not a toilet issue (after a thorough inspection) but the disco noise is terrible and the first guy accompanies Blondie on the 2 mile journey back to gormless man at Front Desk.

The security man and Blondie return and we are taken to another "wing". He even takes our bags.

We express our gratitude effusively to the guy whom we reward with our genuine (to Americans it seem uber effusive but it was genuine) gratitude and some financial compensation ( no, not enough to put a discount on a condo but dignified and respectful offering....) and reward as his shift ended at 11.00pm.....it was now 11.35pm......we had been up for 22 hours !!!!

 

And so to a great nights sleep despite not being able to keep the curtains open because of a night light outside.

 

Awoke at 7.00am to a "catter-walling" of local gardeners and cleaners and all and sundry who were barking greetings to one another at the commencement of their shifts directly outside our room. It was friendly

And then the "beeping" began, omitted from dozens of vehicles reversing outside the door !!!!

 

SD tomorrow.......thank Gawd.

Hum may be in a better mood.

"How do like them apples" Generator Bill (AKA Commander Courageous) ?

Was the verbose drivel to your liking ?

 

PS We are staying at the hotel (Marriott Frenchman's Ref & Morning Star Resort) favoured by ctbjr1309 (or some such number) in St.Thomas in the block he and his lady favoured when we visited them a while ago. In fact it is quite nice. We chose it because of these guys but our room was smaller than theres. Nevertheless it was quite good.

Sadly the lunch we were looking forward to on the terrace was not available due to re-modelling. Hum remembers the flank steak was divine.

We ate at The Sands Bar instead. Very good and great staff.

 

Here endeth the "yammering"

[ho-hum]

Obviously someone closed the door on Ho, as he was yammering on for so long....

 

Obviously someone closed the door on Ho, as he was yammering on for so long....

 

Oh do make up your mind !

The damn cheek of it all !

At least one educated, discerning reader enjoys the "yammering" (is it even a word ! maybe round the settlement but in civilised society ? No, did'nt think so).

 

Hello Jim,

I love reading idle jottings, I'm addicted, it's like a soap! The banter is so much insightful and fun! I'm waiting with baited breath to see the BBC documentary, true! I hope the viewing time will be announced.

Cheers Millie

 

Such a relief to be joined by a lady of discernment and taste !

The "dregs" Hum is abused by is quite intolerable at times.

 

More BBC filming at Ho Hum Palace ........ Hum was not required. Blondie was all they wanted. Hum ended up running errands. Oh the indignity of it all !

[Jim Avery]

More BBC filming at Ho Hum Palace ........ Hum was not required. Blondie was all they wanted. Hum ended up running errands. Oh the indignity of it all !

 

I can understand that......I have kissed you both.:eek: Roll Tide!:D

[MillieRyan08]

 

Such a relief to be joined by a lady of discernment and taste !

The "dregs" Hum is abused by is quite intolerable at times.

 

More BBC filming at Ho Hum Palace ........ Hum was not required. Blondie was all they wanted. Hum ended up running errands. Oh the indignity of it all !

 

Dear ho-hum, As a total outsider, soon to be in the club, I may as well contribute here seeing as you copied me into this forum. By my interpretation, I think you all give and get as good as each other! And it is so very very entertaining. You all must have the best time when together, and if I think that if there was (is) alcohol in the mix, then it must be hilarious when at the TOYB of Seadream.

 

Now I watch the Golden Globes, Oscars, all the award ceremonies, purely to see the outfits the ladies are wearing. So for me, when the BBC Doco is finally released, I will solely be looking at the clothes, hair, makeup, shoes, jewels, the women, especially Blondie as the star, are wearing! And unless you are wearing masks, will also be good to see the faces behind all this idle jottings banter. Seriously I can't wait for it!

 

Cheers, Millie.....and thanks for the show, the casting is brilliant!

[ho-hum]

Secret message for Blondie......Dahrling, your camera was seen used several times for group photos, usually taken by your accomplices (crew). Would you be able to encode them to me as soon as decorum allows? I do believe I gave you my custom printed, 24K gold embossed on veal skin business card whilst in the bar one evening. Thank you love, kiss-kiss.:eek::D

 

Once the team of "Photoshop" experts have finally completed making Hum appear less paunchy (they have their work cut out), remove the two "double chins", conceal the grease stains on his shirts and likened Hum to a young Marlon Brando with Elvis's curling lip, then........and only then, will Hum release the photos.

Capiche ?

Just because you look like a smouldering Clark Gable.....it makes Hum appear as the fat one in Laurel & Hardy in comparison.

 

Sorry the only "business card" received was an email scrawled on the back of a US lottery ticket in red biro !

Fortunately this did not invalidate the winning ticket and you have left us with the dilemma of how to spend the $765 million !

Maybe we will take one or two more cruises on SD......

Oh un-lucky Jim !

[Jim Avery]

Once the team of "Photoshop" experts have finally completed making Hum appear less paunchy (they have their work cut out), remove the two "double chins", conceal the grease stains on his shirts and likened Hum to a young Marlon Brando with Elvis's curling lip, then........and only then, will Hum release the photos.

Capiche ?

Just because you look like a smouldering Clark Gable.....it makes Hum appear as the fat one in Laurel & Hardy in comparison.

 

Sorry the only "business card" received was an email scrawled on the back of a US lottery ticket in red biro !

Fortunately this did not invalidate the winning ticket and you have left us with the dilemma of how to spend the $765 million !

Maybe we will take one or two more cruises on SD......

Oh un-lucky Jim !

 

Just pay for our tickets too and we will call it even.......And make your cruise that much better to boot!

[abenaki]

Filming at chez Hum? Really?

 

Isn't there an issue with some of the manor staff being out on work related disability at the moment? Did this mean that Ho had to step in and save the day with his feather duster en main? Or did you just draw the winter velvets across the panes?

 

I can imagine all of the vehicles of the film production company clogging the laneways, and knowing the way celebrity news spreads like wildfire, I expect by now that the local Am Dram Society, the POSH PART PLAYERS, have tapped Ho to be the Headliner in their upcoming production, The Golden Moments of Gilbert & Sullivan, abridged version, to be presented in the Church Hall this spring. The smell of the greasepaint, the roar of the crowd.....

 

A matinee idol has a certain responsibility with regards to the local charitable activities in the village, and the heart of Ho is certainly in the right place in these matters. But remember, the pressure on Rudolph Valentino was more than he was able to manage.

[Jim Avery]

Dear ho-hum, As a total outsider, soon to be in the club, I may as well contribute here seeing as you copied me into this forum. By my interpretation, I think you all give and get as good as each other! And it is so very very entertaining. You all must have the best time when together, and if I think that if there was (is) alcohol in the mix, then it must be hilarious when at the TOYB of Seadream.

 

Now I watch the Golden Globes, Oscars, all the award ceremonies, purely to see the outfits the ladies are wearing. So for me, when the BBC Doco is finally released, I will solely be looking at the clothes, hair, makeup, shoes, jewels, the women, especially Blondie as the star, are wearing! And unless you are wearing masks, will also be good to see the faces behind all this idle jottings banter. Seriously I can't wait for it!

 

Cheers, Millie.....and thanks for the show, the casting is brilliant!

 

Hi Millie. Fear not, Mr. Hum will get around to answering you. You must imagine the pressures his fan base and the media put upon him. Welcome to Cruise Critic and SeaDream. I am sure you will have an outstanding time.:D

[ho-hum]

Filming at chez Hum? Really?

 

Isn't there an issue with some of the manor staff being out on work related disability at the moment? Did this mean that Ho had to step in and save the day with his feather duster en main? Or did you just draw the winter velvets across the panes?

 

I can imagine all of the vehicles of the film production company clogging the laneways, and knowing the way celebrity news spreads like wildfire, I expect by now that the local Am Dram Society, the POSH PART PLAYERS, have tapped Ho to be the Headliner in their upcoming production, The Golden Moments of Gilbert & Sullivan, abridged version, to be presented in the Church Hall this spring. The smell of the greasepaint, the roar of the crowd.....

 

A matinee idol has a certain responsibility with regards to the local charitable activities in the village, and the heart of Ho is certainly in the right place in these matters. But remember, the pressure on Rudolph Valentino was more than he was able to manage.

 

....and darling they want even more (the BBC) !

They want to return for FULL lighting showing interior shots for a GLAMOUR shoot (their words) and interview !

And can Blondie wear one of her gorgeous gowns.

They want Hum smoking a cigar in his smoking jacket in the Study sitting at his desk in his padded leather arm chair with a small fire blazing away also sipping on a single malt in a tumbler (yes crystal, naturally).

 

You are right, the Posh Part Players, Amateur Dramatics are expected to invite Hum as lead, any day now.

Hum's thinking "Pirates ........of Penzance".

Hum knows all the words and Hum thinks the nautical link to SD would work well.....yes Director's duties too.

Are there no end to Hum's talents......obviously not.

 

"And when the breezes blow,

I generally go below,

and seek the seclusion that a cabin grants,

And so do his sisters, and his cousins and his aunts"

 

Of course there will be no end of fete openings in the summer and guest celebrity visits to tea houses, gun shops for gentleman country pursuits and the like promoting their wares for the local paper (Posh Gazette). Talk invitations to the Town Womens Guild, the Womens Institute, Rotary and dozens of Retirement and Nursing Homes full of well off old dowagers.

 

You are a little hasty to proclaim Hum as a mature, modern day, heartthrob (the new Rudolf Valentino you say) but who is Hum to argue with you (this time).

Will Hum be swayed by dalliances hither and thither ?

Absolutely not. Of course the ladies will be terribly disappointed (and maybe a few gentlemen too !).

But Hum is a one woman guy and that is Blondie and always will be.

It is love you see.

 

You are quite correct concerning housekeeping duties. One of our two fat ladies is having knee parts replaced (probably on account of the crushing weight that bears down on them).

Hum cant bear to look under the beds and sofas !

They can't reach down you see. Hum worries, if they ever fell over...how on earth would he get them up.

They also double up as waitresses when we have a "do".

They are a gregarious couple and our chums adore them.

Hum firmly tells chums they will only work for H&B, in case "chums" have ideas of their own.

Hum adores them and they are lovely wenches with humungus bosoms.

They also take all items we no longer require for their car boot sales.

One of the ladies also works for a posh supermarket chain which enables us to buy DP at staff discount.

Do you see that with Hum's champagne habit, Hum has cleaning free (allowing for the staff discounts) and they deliver it !

[JES4845]

Anybody else get SD brochure in mail touting Med cruise and private jet around Africa for May 2017? Fine print says $107,000 PER PERSON! Yes, you read it right, over one-hundred-thousand-dollars PER PERSON double occupancy. Single supplement is more! Limited to 52 people! So who here will be the first to sign up? Since we didn't win the Powerball lottery we are not a likely candidate to sign up at this particular moment ... LOL. Seriously, not sure why this makes sense for SD from a marketing perspective ... is a merger with Trump Hotels in the offing? Billionaires only, mere millionaires not welcome? LOL

[abenaki]

[quote=ho-hum;

 

You are a little hasty to proclaim Hum as a mature, modern dayno,

 

No, I never said mature, I'm quite sure I didn't say that Hum was mature.....

[whatnot]

Yes got the brochure. Not for me either. Just threw it in the trash. I do wonder if they will make it work.

[kathyanddanny]

We recieved the brochure also...and it's a no go for us! Sounds lovely but maybe another lifetime!....how many voyages can we take for 100.00 grand!?...

:D

[kathyanddanny]

Sorry add another 0 to that! LOL

Edited January 21, 2016 by kathyanddanny

[ho-hum]

[quote name=ho-hum;

 

You are a little hasty to proclaim Hum as a mature' date=' modern dayno,

 

No, I never said mature, I'm quite sure I didn't say that Hum was mature.....[/quote]

 

Mature....as in a polite way of saying OLD......Mr.Picky (admittedly not mature in terms of being "grown up and all").

[ho-hum]

We were chatting the other day about wifi on SD.

 

Seems the luxury cruising brand Crystal are light years ahead of the competition with their wifi service and it's free !

 

Re-arrange these words into a common phrase: "out SD pull to finger its needs"

 

The first correct answer wins a Presidente beer (subject to the normal terms and conditions and impossible to meet conditions. Offer expires by the time you have read "offer expires").

 

Anybody a goin' on the Crystal Espirit (and check out the wifi) ?

 

The first regular poster on "........idle jottings" to report from the Crystal Espirit on their wifi on week beginning 14 February, 2016 wins five year's supply of Presidente beers (all you can drink. No conditions apply).

 

Commander Courageous and Abenaki will likely be sponsoring this competition in light of the excessive fees gained as Hum's TV and film agents provided they have"nt absconded with the many millions !

Edited January 21, 2016 by ho-hum

[commander courageous]

Wonder who that might be reporting from the Espirit?

 

Happy to provide the beer money from my own pockets, as the

only check received from the BBC so far was for $16.83. Apparently

they are having difficulty "selling" the Hum documentary to a

discerning audience. This, of course, was before the extensive

reshoots now underway at the Posh Parts manse. Word from the

set is that a lot of "air brushing" is underway on double chins and the

"corpulence" of one of the principal stars.

 

To date, this minipic has cost the BBC more than the five seasons of

Downton Abbey with no end in sight.

[Jim Avery]

To date, this minipic has cost the BBC more than the five seasons of

Downton Abbey with no end in sight.

 

Speaking of Downton Abbey, I heard it on Oprah, so it must be true, the producers of DA originally wanted Ho-Hum Castle for the setting. Due to an unbelievable load of social and business ventures, Mr. Hum was unable to participate thus they used the smaller (much) Highclere Castle. The BBC scored a major coup filming the interior of Ho-Hum Castle so should sell dozens of videos......

[Ragnar Danneskjold]

Speaking of humble abodes, we have signed the contract for the expansion of Palazzo Danneskjold, including the vaunted temperature-controlled wine room. Construction is due to be finished this summer (assuming all the approvals and permits come forth with minimal delay, after greasing the palms of all the petty functionaries involved...). All doe-eyed baby seals and nesting sea turtles have been "encouragd" to leave before the Coastal Commision goons come to extract their several pounds of flesh :rolleyes: Knew I'd find a use for that old cattle prod.

 

So between this debacle and a few trips we have planned, ol' Ragnar will be very busy for the next six months or so. Will try to report in on our upcoming Windstar cruise to the "ABC" islands. (No Jim. that is not Alchoholic Beverage Control)

[Jim Avery]

But they do have alcohol there.......:eek:

[Jim Avery]

Speaking of humble abodes, we have signed the contract for the expansion of Palazzo Danneskjold, including the vaunted temperature-controlled wine room. Construction is due to be finished this summer (assuming all the approvals and permits come forth with minimal delay, after greasing the palms of all the petty functionaries involved...). All doe-eyed baby seals and nesting sea turtles have been "encouragd" to leave before the Coastal Commision goons come to extract their several pounds of flesh :rolleyes: Knew I'd find a use for that old cattle prod.

 

So between this debacle and a few trips we have planned, ol' Ragnar will be very busy for the next six months or so. Will try to report in on our upcoming Windstar cruise to the "ABC" islands. (No Jim. that is not Alchoholic Beverage Control)

 

So when WILL you be ready for the visit from Ho-Hum & Blondie accompanied by Mr. & Mrs. Cassidy? We could bring along the Vandrefalks to talk tank and the Zimmys for fun. Heck, why not GanttC& Ted too?? If y'all have to go somewhere, just leave the key under the mat. We will be there when you return.:eek::D:D

[ho-hum]

Anybody else get SD brochure in mail touting Med cruise and private jet around Africa for May 2017? Fine print says $107,000 PER PERSON! Yes, you read it right, over one-hundred-thousand-dollars PER PERSON double occupancy. Single supplement is more! Limited to 52 people! So who here will be the first to sign up? Since we didn't win the Powerball lottery we are not a likely candidate to sign up at this particular moment ... LOL. Seriously, not sure why this makes sense for SD from a marketing perspective ... is a merger with Trump Hotels in the offing? Billionaires only, mere millionaires not welcome? LOL

 

Yes got the brochure. Not for me either. Just threw it in the trash. I do wonder if they will make it work.

 

We recieved the brochure also...and it's a no go for us! Sounds lovely but maybe another lifetime!....how many voyages can we take for 100.00 grand!?...

:D

 

Oh do keep up guys !

This is old news..........did you know the American civil war is over too !

 

Whilst Hum applauds Oslo for introducing something new; this particular itinerary is what the UK motor trade would call a "cut and shunt" car.

The front and back part are from different vehicles welded together....it doesn't work.

Many years ago Hum suggested renting Nekker Island for a week followed by SD or vica versa.....now that would work. Sadly no one listens to Hum.