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December 3-10, Epic (in length) Review

Swells1

By Swells1,
in Norwegian Cruise Line

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Swells1

Swells1

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So far, so good. I am following. We will be on her in March. I am a CCL cheerleader but felt I had to give NCL a shot.

Welcome to NCL! I hope you aren't making any decisions based on my review. You might never want to leave your home!

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Swells1

Swells1

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"Dolce and Gabbana Light Blue perfume and my Bath and Body Works White Citrus body wash, body spray and lotion- all of which smell citrus-y and lemon-y. "

 

That's too funny...plus I have that perfume and love everything white citrus from BBW!!!!

 

Waiting for the rest of your review!

I only wear it on cruises, so when I'm having a bad day, I can smell it and be taken back.

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Swells1

Swells1

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Thanks for the review. It's nice to read a different perspective about the cruise. I brought a bunch of motion sickness medicine too. Thank goodness because I had to pass some out to a couple people on the tender to GSC.

Hey, Ray! Glad to see you here!

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Swells1

Swells1

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Still happily following along! What a great review! I feel your pain with making all of the arrangements with no input and getting the 'next time we should...' or 'it would have been nice to...' :rolleyes: Hubs and I are also huge music fans - we do a music charter cruise every year and spend way too much travelling to concerts. You mentioned wondering if you could get another week alone on the Epic - I'll be doing just that next month. I'll let you know how it goes. ;) Thanks for doing the in-depth review - it's really well done. I'm starting to wonder if you're my long-lost cruise soul-mate! :eek:

There you are!

Thanks for following along. I can't wait to read your review.

I can't convince Collin to take a music theme cruise. I'm not sure why...

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Swells1

Swells1

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Too funny swells1!! Can't wait to finish it. Great minds...hmmmm;)

Thanks for following.

My mom used to say when we agreed on something, "Brilliant minds think a like"

I always responded with, "I think we just proved the opposite is true, too"

She never thought I was funny.

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Swells1

Swells1

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Did you go in the water at GSC? I have heard it is pretty cold this time of year. I'm from Florida so chilly water is not for me. We are leaving in 6 days and have the thermal spa pass. I'm thinking of just staying on board and hanging out at the spa instead of getting off at GSC. Thoughts??

I didn't go into the water. I haven't owned a bathing suit since I was 9 years old. Sorry.

I enjoyed my time there, and would've regretted not getting off the ship.

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SquishTheWhale

SquishTheWhale

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I have to admit, I normally click onto a review like this and think 'no food pictures. Won't bother reading' (I know, I'm terrible) and click back. And I was about to... but then my eye caught the paragraph about Linda, and I started reading, and I was hooked. Your writing style is so frank and engaging, things that shouldn't be very interesting just are!

 

To be honest I think you're a saint- organising everything and then having to put up with all that complaining and catering to 3 fussy people when on board! I'm the planner too, but only for myself and my partner. I still get so annoyed when he complains about stuff- the most recent one was 'why does this map of Budapest you printed out have no scale bar on it? It's useless'. Oh, because you spent so long before the trip booking hotels, attractions, printing off maps etc did you! So I know what it's like for all that work to be unappreciated. Oh, I also got told off last cruise for not pre warning him what night we had Cagneys booked on, as he didn't feel like having steak that night and needed more time to prepare himself for steak. Sigh.

 

Anyway, I'm looking forward to the next installment! I think you deserve a solo cruise after this one!

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Swells1

Swells1

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I have to admit, I normally click onto a review like this and think 'no food pictures. Won't bother reading' (I know, I'm terrible) and click back. And I was about to... but then my eye caught the paragraph about Linda, and I started reading, and I was hooked. Your writing style is so frank and engaging, things that shouldn't be very interesting just are!

 

To be honest I think you're a saint- organising everything and then having to put up with all that complaining and catering to 3 fussy people when on board! I'm the planner too, but only for myself and my partner. I still get so annoyed when he complains about stuff- the most recent one was 'why does this map of Budapest you printed out have no scale bar on it? It's useless'. Oh, because you spent so long before the trip booking hotels, attractions, printing off maps etc did you! So I know what it's like for all that work to be unappreciated. Oh, I also got told off last cruise for not pre warning him what night we had Cagneys booked on, as he didn't feel like having steak that night and needed more time to prepare himself for steak. Sigh.

 

Anyway, I'm looking forward to the next installment! I think you deserve a solo cruise after this one!

Thanks for sticking around!

We trip planners just don't get the sympathy we deserve!

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sid_9169 "Live from...." Rare

sid_9169

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I'm really enjoying your review... I just returned from the Epic yesterday, and was also the organizer for the Cruise Critic M&G. Just one quick question. Did NCL provide you with any "special amenities" for being the group leader for the M&G? I have done this previously on the Escape and Getaway, and they literally treated me like royalty. (Fancy soap and shampoo from the Haven. Priority tender and disembarkation. An invite to the Captain's Reception in the Haven, ect...) On the Epic, I got nada, zip, nothing. Not even a letter in my cabin reminding me of the event. Just wondering if you had the same experience? Thanks, and loving your review...

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Swells1

Swells1

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I'm really enjoying your review... I just returned from the Epic yesterday, and was also the organizer for the Cruise Critic M&G. Just one quick question. Did NCL provide you with any "special amenities" for being the group leader for the M&G? I have done this previously on the Escape and Getaway, and they literally treated me like royalty. (Fancy soap and shampoo from the Haven. Priority tender and disembarkation. An invite to the Captain's Reception in the Haven, ect...) On the Epic, I got nada, zip, nothing. Not even a letter in my cabin reminding me of the event. Just wondering if you had the same experience? Thanks, and loving your review...

 

I didn't get anything before the M&G, but did get some chocolate covered strawberries and a bottle of wine afterward.

 

Thanks for following along!!

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Swells1

Swells1

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Tuesday morning would find us in Ocho Rios. Linda was most excited about this day.

 

I woke up on time, but Collin was moving slow. Our excursion time was 8:30 am, and I hate being late. Mom called to tell me they were ready and Collin was still watching TV.

(How anyone could watch a TV that doesn't swivel is beyond my comprehension.)

 

She told me they were going to breakfast and see ya' there. By the time we got there, they had already ordered. Mom complained that she didn't know what we wanted, or she would have ordered for us. Service was super slow, and I could see people leaving the ship. I knew we were going to miss our excursion. I hope no one expected their money back! We FINALLY finished eating, and Collin and I had to go back to the cabin to get my excursion bag. (Somehow, he assured me this would be a good idea.) Linda needed a cigarette, so we left them in the casino. When we returned, my mom was FLIPPING out.

"I CAN'T FIND MY DRIVER'S LICENSE!"

We all tried to calm her down, but she would have no part of it. She said she'd left it in her camera case and someone had STOLEN it. At this point, instead of reminding her that she had always been horribly disorganized, I broke down her theory.

"So you think someone was able to open the camera case you keep on your shoulder, look over your expensive camera, the wad of cash, and your room key to steal your driver's license?"

 

"Just go without me! I won't be responsible for ruining your fun!"

I don't know how many times she repeated that. We finally convinced her to go back to her cabin and look again. We were not going to go ashore without her.

 

Since the middle of breakfast, I had been quietly fuming. I hate being late. I hate scrambling to make alternative plans and I knew everyone would be looking to me. But, right after mom left the anger just went away. We were in Jamaica! I had never been there before. We could still have fun. I can't let other people control my emotions. Besides, I was just as responsible for all this- I could've insisted we eat at the buffet. Or I could've left earlier when mom called. That would have made Collin move a little faster.

The weight had been lifted, and I told Linda to come with me to help her find her ID.

 

Linda had been really quiet all morning, and I was hoping my mom hadn't said something horrible to her. I had just found my Zen, and didn't want to lose it now. I asked if she was okay and she told me her phone wasn't working. She said she had called her carrier before she left and they specifically told her she would have coverage in Jamaica. I told her wait until we were off the ship to try again. She was probably still picking signal from the ship. That seemed to help.

 

She had asked me about contacting home months before we left. I told her that my cheap-o phone plan didn't work outside the US. I didn't know the details about hers. Besides, this was the time to get away from home and responsibilities. (I know the people she deals with. If her husband or employees thought for one minute they could get a hold of her, she would never see a quiet moment.) She told me she just wanted to be available in case of emergency. I got a little blunt with her. I asked what she was going to do if something happened. She didn't have a passport, and even if she did, we couldn't afford to fly her home on short notice. She would be stuck on the cruise being miserable.

 

The cabin looked like a crime scene. She had dumped the contents of her camera case, her purse, and her excursion bag on the bed. She was crying and yelling and basically throwing a tantrum. Then she just stopped and said, "Oh, never mind. I have the temporary paper copy they gave me while I was waiting for my new license. Let's go."

(Hold up a minute. Did I just black out? How can anyone have 180 degree attitude shift in a fraction of a second?):confused:

 

We found Collin and headed toward the exit. Collin was dumbfounded. Pfft. His head would have exploded if he'd witnessed what I just had.

 

I like the way the Ocho Rios port area is set up. Ship sponsored excursions over here, private tours over here and everyone else over here. I figured, what the heck? We were over 30 minutes late, but I wanted to hear from someone official that we had missed the bus. I had booked the Green Grotto tour through Viator. I really want to see the Dunn's River Falls, but every picture or video I saw just had too many people. When we got to where we needed to be, there was a nice lady with a clip board who got our information and called someone on her radio. I tried explaining to her that we were probably too late, but she didn't seem to notice. Ninety seconds later, our driver came for us. We apologized for running late, and he brushed it off. No big deal. Linda still didn't have signal, and she was pouting.

 

The drive to the Caverns was nice. The driver was very knowledgeable about the area. Collin and I enjoyed the trip. Grumpy and Psycho weren't saying much.

 

The Green Grotto Caverns were beautiful. Our tour guide, Courtney, was terrific. Very engaging. Everyone's mood improved, and we had a great time. I'll post some pictures at the end of the review. At one point, a local man, who I assumed worked there, walked by us singing and swinging a machete. Based on his 'aroma', I'm guessing he was having a good day.

 

As we were going from area to another, Courtney told us this section was called the "Wishing Well" and then paused for everyone to catch up. I noticed Collin wasn't paying attention, so I said, "Hmm. That's really interesting."

"What?"

"Didn't you hear what the guide said? If you listen closely, you can hear the ghost of Terence Trent D'Arby."

"Really?"

"Oh, Sweetie. It's a good thing you have such pretty hair."

Of course, we were humming that song for the rest of the day. No one else got the joke. We were made for each other.

(For those of you who aren't familiar, Terence Trent D'Arby was a singer in the 80's. He had two hits. One was called "Wishing Well" and it's one of those songs that really stick in your head.)

 

The tour lasted about three hours, and was very interesting, although I don't remember much about it. Runaway slaves and pirates and the Spanish... I banged my head a lot, so I'll blame that for my memory lapse. It's probably a good thing I had to wear that dreadful hardhat and hairnet.

 

We exited at the gift shop, of course. Linda needed a cigarette, and mom and I needed the restroom. When we emerged, we saw the most glorious site. It was a cooler stocked with Coke. I wiped a tear from my eye and offered the lady at the window a blank cheque. The Coke was flat, but still the best thing I'd ever had.

 

As we drove back to the pier area, Linda asked if we still had time to find a beach. She was carrying her suit and still had the dream of putting her feet in the ocean. (Sigh- we spent the entire day at the beach on Sunday!) I told her I'm not familiar with the area but we'd see what we could do. She was also still upset about her phone. She kept saying, "I promised him I would call from Jamaica". I told her we would look for a Starbucks or something and use Wi-Fi. Maybe she could video chat. That seemed to please her.

 

We were let out near the shops at the pier and spent some time browsing. I got my magnet and postcards and was good to go. Collin wanted some Jamaica Blue Mountain Coffee. He was about to spend $40 for a pound. I stopped him and promised we could do better.

 

I spotted a sign in one of the shops advertising free wi-fi and pointed it out to Linda. She nodded and we went in opposite directions. Later, in another shop, I asked her if she had any luck. "No," she said. "They needed a password"

(Seriously?!? It didn't occur to you to ASK for a password!?!)

 

The more we browsed, the mopier she got. I asked her if she wanted to go back to the first place. She didn't. Mom and Collin were both getting irritated- with me.

"Didn't you tell her she wouldn't have service?"

"Why didn't you tell her how phones work?"

"Next time, we need to plan better and make sure everyone is informed."

 

Collin was hungry and wanted to try local food. It is a source of great shame to me that I've forgotten the name of the restaurant we found. It was an outdoor patio place. The kind of place I usually avoid. The food was okay, but not great. I ordered jerk chicken, and was expecting more flavor. They must have taken one look at me and knew I couldn't handle it.

 

I asked a server to point us in the direction of a supermarket. She said it was a 10-minute walk. It was more like 5. Collin bought a pound of coffee for $10. He spent the rest of the day asking everyone we saw if it was authentic.

 

Mom and Collin were getting tired and Linda was still mad about her phone. It was time to go back to the ship. As we were walking, my mom whispered to me, "I found my driver's license, it was in my wallet. But that's not where I put it."

I haven't told anyone else about that, so let's just keep that between us.

Our bags were searched before we got back on the ship, and the security guy assured Collin his coffee was probably real, but no one asked for ID.

 

We went back to our cabins to freshen up. Collin needed a cigarette, so he went up to deck 15. I went next door, and mom answered the door. She said Linda was also out smoking. I asked if everything was okay, and she said Linda was homesick. I hear a noise outside and it was Collin opening our door. I went back to our cabin. Collin told me he found Linda and she was crying. I called mom over to hear what Collin was saying. Collin and I decided we needed to help her call home. "She's not using the phone in my cabin!''

 

I rolled my eyes and didn't respond. Mom and I left. First, we went to guest services to find out exactly how to make a call from the ship. I wasn't sure if a country code was needed. They gave us a slip of paper with directions, and we went to find Linda. She was still crying when we found her. She was embarrassed and apologized over and over. She had never been away from her kids this long. She didn't know how much it would affect her. I told her she could use my cabin to call home. She was so grateful, but was worried about paying me back. I had bought her a $25 NCL gift card for her birthday earlier in the year. When she tried to apply it to her account, they refused it because it had my name on it. Weird. She had given it back to me and I hadn't gotten around to taking it the front desk. So, I told her I would just keep it in exchange for the call. She seemed relieved. I wasn't too concerned with the money, but I understand not wanting to feel like a mooch or a charity case. When we decided to invite her along, that was the very first thing I told everyone. Linda is helping us out, and even though she isn't paying for the cabin, her input is every bit as important as anyone else's.

 

We went back to our cabin, and I told Collin that Linda needed some privacy. I told her we would be in the "hidden stairwell" and maybe we would explore the opposite side. Just meet us there when you're finished.

 

We tried the Starboard side first- the side closest to us. Then, we went to the Port side. It's a lot bigger over there. After a few minutes, a crew member came out of the spa. He looked at us for a few seconds, but didn't say anything. He continued walking down the stairs. I said he was probably looking for a place to sneak a cigarette. We took some photos, and the ship started to sail. I kept peeking out the door for Linda. After some time, another crew member came out. He also gave us the stink eye. Collin asked him if everything was okay and did we need to leave? The crew member told us that this was an employee-only area and we shouldn't be there. I knew he wasn't being honest, but I didn't say anything about it. He probably just wanted some alone time.

 

Having been kicked out of the stairwell, we went to check on Linda. She was in her cabin. She was a new person. She got to talk to her hubby and he assured her that her kids were fine.

 

We had an early dinner at Taste. This would be my only dinner at the MDR. The food was fine, but the service was slow. We ordered our teas with lime again. Linda went to the ladies' room before they were delivered with lemon. We quietly slipped her lemon into my glass and she was none the wiser.

 

We went to the see the Beatles for the second time. I didn't realize it would be a completely different show. The first show was the really young guys, and last show would be the really long-haired guys, so the second show was somewhere in the middle. It ended with Sergeant Pepper. Mom got to come this time, and she was determined to recreate the night she missed. We sat in the exact same seats, and she ordered us all Pina Coladas. John winked at me again.

(Be cool, John. My husband is RIGHT HERE! I believe someone said you have to hide your love away...)

 

We hit the casino for a few minutes, but I was mentally and emotionally drained. I was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

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Jldevlin

Jldevlin

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I travel with my 88 year old mom ..... I feel your pain ....I took my cousin with me on our Alaska cruise ..she could share a room with Mom !!!! so much less work for me ...yeah not so much ....she kept ditching mom to go have a smoke ...or go hang out with her other cousins who were on with us ....You think it will be easy on a cruise right ???

They cant get lost .. there are lots of activities so you wont have to entertain them all the time ..... nope .... what are we doing next ??? ummm I dont know you look and then tell me what you want to do .... oh I dont care .. anything you pick is fine ...okay shall we go and listen to the piano player ??? No ... I dont like piano playing ...really ???? I love my mom ... I love my mom ..

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katiecat

katiecat

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I always say I’m going to write a review, and never follow through. So, inspired by the wonderful reviews I read every day, I’m going to go for it. Lower your expectations- I’m no Mitsugirly! We've been back almost a week now, and I'm so jealous of those who can immediately begin a review. I haven't even unpacked yet! I've just been so busy trying to play catch-up at work, I don't have time to do anything! This is the first time I've been on Cruise Critic since we left. That says a lot!

 

First of all, let me take a moment (or ten) to introduce the group. I always find this part very important. I think the best reviews are written by people I can relate to, or have something in common with. There’s me- I’m Stacie. I’m in my late 30s (When did that happened? I used to be 19!), and this was my 4th cruise- all with NCL. Just a head's up- I have what I would call a dry sense of humor, although I hear the word "snarky" bandied about more than I would like, so don't say you weren't warned.

 

Collin is the hubs- he’s in his mid 40s. This was his 3rd- all with NCL. We have been married for 18 years, and have no children. We tend to cruise once every other year. We are huge music fans, and we usually take 2-5 day road trips about every month for concerts. We love cruising, but music is our first love.

 

Carolyn is my mom, although she'll be known as "Mom" in this review. I’m forbidden to tell you her age, but I will say she is old enough to have me for a daughter without having been featured in either the Guinness Book of World Records or the Weekly World News. This was her 3rd cruise- all with NCL.

 

The one thing you really need to know about me (and this really goes for all three of us) is this:

If I were to walk into a travel agency and said “Pick the perfect vacation for me!” a cruise ship would be the absolute LAST choice. I don’t drink AT ALL. Really. I read reviews all the time that say, “I don’t drink- usually 2-3 per day”. That’s drinking, my friend. I have never had a sip of alcohol in my life- not even NyQuil. The hubs is a Friend of Bill, so he doesn’t drink. My mom will have one mixed drink for the entire week- and she’s good until the next cruise. We also don’t particularly like beaches and I don’t eat seafood, although Collin does. I used to say the only seafood I eat is hushpuppies, but too no one got it.

 

Despite all this, we still love cruising.

 

That brings me to Linda. She requires a little back story. Back in 2012, I took my mom on her first cruise- just the two of us- and she loved it. My beloved, Collin had a decidedly different opinion about being left at home. So, in 2014, it was the three of us, and we had a great time, except one problem. My mom and my husband have opposite vacation personalities, and I am somewhere in the middle. He says, “A vacation is my time to rest and take it easy”. She says, “I can read a book or take a nap at home- for free.” My mom was in the cabin next door, and she wanted to go explore the ship and participate in activities, but wouldn’t do anything alone. Every minute I wasn’t with her, I knew she was lonely and bored and I felt guilty. Collin and I work opposite hours. It’s not uncommon for us to go two weeks without seeing each other. So, we were together for a whole week- no chores or errands- just a week to relax and hang out. Every minute I wasn’t with him, I felt guilty. When we started planning this cruise, we knew a roomie would be a necessity. It was going to be a sweet deal for the other person. Mom was happy to pay the 200% single supplement, so adding another person wouldn’t increase her total. That person would just need to pay their own airfare, DSC and spending money. The problem was finding the right person. Her husband isn’t interested in cruising, and she doesn’t have many single friends. Also, it seems to me that more and more Baby Boomers are busy taking care of grandchildren or elderly parents- or both.

 

First she approached Crystal- a family friend. At the time, Crystal was working as a round-the-clock, in-house caretaker for an older woman. In ten years, she hadn’t taken a full day off. Everyone thought she deserved a vacation. Unfortunately, the woman in her care passed away, and Crystal hadn’t saved a single cent in the entire time she was there. She decided food and shelter were more important than a Caribbean cruise. (Some people, huh?)

 

So, then she thought of Angie. This would have been a beautiful story. Angie is my mom’s niece- my cousin. When she was 5 years old, her mother divorced my uncle and took Angie and her younger brothers out of the state. She changed their names, and my uncle never saw his children again. My mom actually tracked them down a few years ago, and they were able to meet my (our) grandmother three months before she died. Angie was excited to come with us, but developed breast cancer. She has a clean bill of health now, but it was dicey for a while, and travel wasn’t a priority. Back to square one.

 

Then we found out that her cousin, Vickie- whose husband enjoyed travel as much as my step-father- was interested. She had been raising her granddaughter, who was about to go off to college, and now had opportunity to go. Then, her husband passed away. It was unexpected and she was in a really bad place for a while.

 

I was afraid people would start to run when they saw her coming, so I decided it was time for me to take over. The first person I thought of was Linda.

 

Linda works as the executive housekeeper at my hotel. A few weeks before we left for the 2014 cruise, she would ask questions about it. She wanted to see pictures of the ship we were going to be on. When I told her about the ports, she would get this far-away look in her eyes, and would say things like, “I’ve always dreamed of going there.” And, the more I talked to her, the more I realized this woman was in NEED of a vacation! Despite having some pretty significant health issues, her no-good husband refused to get a job. Then, her drug-addicted step-daughter left her three young children at her door. Of course, Linda stepped up, and took responsibility for the care of these kids who all have serious behavioral and developmental problems. Linda also kind of reminded me of my mom. They have the same mannerisms, and use the same expressions. I knew they would hit it off, so I set up a play-date, and they became instant friends.

Mom and I split her airfare, and her two grown (biological) children bought her some NCL OBC. Then, the week before we left, the most amazing thing happened- our hotel senior staff threw us a private Bon Voyage party and gave us both a $500 pre-paid gift card with the caveat that they could only be used for spending money on the cruise. (Of course, Linda’s envelope contained a card that could be used to purchase merchandise. Mine contained something that looked alarmingly like a room key card. My suspicions were confirmed when my general manager said, “Don’t forget to return that key card. Those things cost $.30 each, ya know?” Yes, I know.)

 

The great thing about taking Linda is she had never been anywhere, or really done anything. She had never flown, never seen the ocean, and never been on any kind of boat- let alone a mega-ship. It’s easy sometimes to become jaded, so it’s nice to see things from someone else’s point of view. And, I knew she would be able to drag the three of us out of our comfort zone.

 

Wow. That was a REALLY long introduction! Thanks for hanging in there. I promise I will talk about the cruise!!

 

I'm going to stop here and wait for some responses. It's a bit awkward putting yourself out there when you aren't sure anyone is actually interested! :o

 

You got my attention

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