**OFF TOPIC*** - Cruise Fashions & Beauty Forum

[rbm444]

I have been following this post for a while, and first learned of Sue's diagnosis through her posting on "The Dress". My husband smiled at me as I cried as I read the board, he knows I cry at the drop of a hat, I wear my emotions on my sleeve so they say. You are all in my prayers and I think of your strength and love of life every day.

But the purpose of this post is to thank you all for what you have done for me. Here is a little background. I have been married for 6 years and have 2 DDs (2 & 4). My in-laws live about 8 hours away and come up every 4-6 weeks and stay for 4-5 days. When they come they bring great grandma as well. Lets just say that the visits are very labor intensive, before, during and after, trying to keep the house clean and the refridgerator stocked. Picking up etc. I do not want to go into details because that is not the purpose of this note. I was gearing up for their latest visit when I was reading this thread.

That is when I realized that they come to visit because they love us and they SPOIL my 2 DDs because they miss them and how lucky I am to have 3 more people that love my kids. Kids can never get too much love and given that my inlaws have both survived cancer and numerous other health problems we do not know how many more visits there will be. We have memories and pictures that will last forever. My kids are lucky that they have both sets of grandparents still alive. My grandparents have been gone for 20 years but I knew them for 20+ years and have great memories and still miss them to this day.

So I took a deep breath and made a commitment to make this a wonderful weekend. I did not stress about anything, I enjoyed watching my father in law push my daughters on the swing, my mother in law, draw pictures with them and read them stories and great granny make paper dolls for the girls to color. So thank you all for helping me realize what a gift they are for us and to enjoy the times we have because we never know when it will end. Thank you all and I hope you have a wonderful week.

[MrsMoose2001]

I have been following this post for a while, and first learned of Sue's diagnosis through her posting on "The Dress". My husband smiled at me as I cried as I read the board, he knows I cry at the drop of a hat, I wear my emotions on my sleeve so they say. You are all in my prayers and I think of your strength and love of life every day.

But the purpose of this post is to thank you all for what you have done for me. Here is a little background. I have been married for 6 years and have 2 DDs (2 & 4). My in-laws live about 8 hours away and come up every 4-6 weeks and stay for 4-5 days. When they come they bring great grandma as well. Lets just say that the visits are very labor intensive, before, during and after, trying to keep the house clean and the refridgerator stocked. Picking up etc. I do not want to go into details because that is not the purpose of this note. I was gearing up for their latest visit when I was reading this thread.

That is when I realized that they come to visit because they love us and they SPOIL my 2 DDs because they miss them and how lucky I am to have 3 more people that love my kids. Kids can never get too much love and given that my inlaws have both survived cancer and numerous other health problems we do not know how many more visits there will be. We have memories and pictures that will last forever. My kids are lucky that they have both sets of grandparents still alive. My grandparents have been gone for 20 years but I knew them for 20+ years and have great memories and still miss them to this day.

So I took a deep breath and made a commitment to make this a wonderful weekend. I did not stress about anything, I enjoyed watching my father in law push my daughters on the swing, my mother in law, draw pictures with them and read them stories and great granny make paper dolls for the girls to color. So thank you all for helping me realize what a gift they are for us and to enjoy the times we have because we never know when it will end. Thank you all and I hope you have a wonderful week.

 

Thank you for sharing that beautiful story. What an uplifting and pleasure to read it.

 

I wish everyone much joy, health and happiness.

[lgarner]

Connie,

I am glad you have a good doctor - I think God's will, prayer and support from family and friends, and great doctors are what makes us survivors! I believe that God gives doctors their wisdom.

 

Have a great time in Toronto and I pray that the chemo goes well for you - try to picture it as tiny angels going into your body to make you well!

 

rbm444,

What a nice reminder about life. We all can learn to enjoy it more and not stress about the details so much. Its a lesson I am still learning!!

 

I hope everyone is having a great hump day! Somehow that almost sounds dirty - not my intention!! LOL

 

Lisa

[DesrtDrmr]

Just checking in and want to wish you all good fortune with your treatments, and let you know that there are more prayers sent your way from HOT Southern Nevada!

You are all so inspiring!

I loved the quilts, and admire your cleverness and talent, and Sue, if I EVER looked like you do in a bikini, I would wear one EVERYWHERE!!! :)

This thread truly denotes "women power"...............thanks!

[Kat_in_Texas]

rbm44 ~

Thank you so much for your posting. I'm trying hard to "count my blessings" today but was having such a hard time doing so ... until I read your post. I don't know why I need to constantly be reminded that I am SOOOO blessed and that I have so very much to be grateful for. Thanks for reminding me with your sweet story.

 

Today is just a sad "grieving" day (I have lost both of my parents since mid-September, my mother died just 7 weeks ago today), an overwhelming day at work (seven major presentations due by Monday), my DH is out of town (whine whine), and I'm trying to take care of my parents' estate issues from 250 miles away (the air conditioning on their rental property completely pooped out yesterday, the estimate was $4900!). I'm being such a baby today missing my two grown kids too ... I'm not overly enthusiastic about being an empty-nester, just loved the whole kid-raising thing so much. (Both kids live out of state.)

 

So ... am I whining enough?!? I know instead of whining I should be singing from the rooftops that I'm:

* happy that my "lump" is probably just a cyst

* joyful that my parents have been reunited in heaven and are happy and whole

* blessed that I have a husband who loves me and misses me when he's gone too!

* lucky to have a good-paying job that I enjoy and that I'm good at

* grateful that I have the money to take care of rental property repairs

* ecstatic that my children are healthy, intelligent, beautiful young adults who can function on their own and have fulfilling lives and bright futures

* and THANKFUL that I can dump all of my concerns, big and little, petty or serious, on our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and HE will ease my hurt and my worrying ... that He WANTS me to bring these details of my life to Him ... that I can leave them at the foot of the cross and be free of them!

 

Whew!!! Praise the Lord, huh?!? :p

 

Anyway, I'm feeling better and will stop my pity party and enjoy the rest of my day, and most of all, be thankful that I'm HERE to live it! Thanks for reminding me to do so!!!

 

Hugs and blessings to all of you.

[KamloopsCruisers]

Hi ladies,

 

Saw my oncologist today - my final visit before my surgery next week. Tumor has grown quite a bit since my last visit - 17 cm in width (almost 7 inches for your imperial measurement folks), so she is happy that my surgery is soon. Mastectomies are quite "easy" surgeries now and, at least here in British Columbia, they are done as "day surgery". Knowing I had to have a skin graft, I naively thought I should expect to stay in the hospital for 3 days. Well, I was wrong (again) - a week at least and possible 10 days I was told today. Grrrrrr! (How will I manage to be away from these boards for so long????)

 

Despite my disappointment that my tumor has grown and that I have to spend so long in the hospital, I too still have much to be thankful for (rbm444 thank you for sharing your story - it was a good reminder for each of us). I will continue with Kat's previous post and list 5 things that I'm thankful for today. Off the top of my (almost bald) head, here they are:

 

- Rick & Natalie's constant love

- The overwhelming support that has come my way - throughout my life - but most recently since I've been diagnosed. I expected support from my close friends and family, but I am surprised (and thankful) for the kindness and prayers of so many - and ladies, this includes you!

- My Mom - especially for arranging maid service for me:)

- Rick taking me out for dinner tonight to one of my favourite restaurants

- Natalie taking me to the movies last night for a mother/daughter bonding time (BTW - the movie "Cars" is grrreat).

 

I know I said I would list only five, but I can't miss this last one: no tuna casseroles were made & delivered for our family today!:D I know they say beggars can't be choosy, but we really don't like them (not even out cat).

 

Connie (cruisingfromcanada) - Special prayers coming your way from me for strength and being able to keep your sense of humour as you undergo your treatments.

[Nliedel]

Been there, done that with the loooong hospital stay (8 weeks). Here's Nancy's best advice for getting through it.

 

if you can get your paws on a laptop with a DVD player do it. A selection of movies is nice when you are stuck in bed and sometimes the meds they give you make it hard to read.

 

Make sure you're honest with you potential visitors. Tell them if you don't feel like chatting, just want to sit fo a bit, want to be alone or anything else you might need. Visitors can't read your mind and they want to help, but don't know how. Just be honest and it will help them help you.

 

Talk to your doctor about sleeping pills ahead of time. I took Ambian in the hospital and it really helped. I was pregnant and it was safe, so it might be for you too. Further if the nurses don't need to wake you up it might be a good idea for them not to. Again, talk to your doc.

 

Take some soft, comfortable t-shirts and t-shirt material pants. get up and get dressed as soon as you can manage it. Brush your hair and wash your face. I know you will not feel like it, but honestly it does make you feel better.

 

As soon as you can manage it get them to let you outside to breath fresh air. Most hospitals have nice gardens for people to sit in. I was only allowed 20 minutes a day, but it saved me mentally.

 

Watch comedy on TV. Even if you don't normally watch the tube. I got into Everybody Loves Raymond and it made me smile every night before I took my pill.

 

Hospital food is AWFUL. No lie, no joke. As soon as you are on a normal diet get your other half to bring you real food once a day.

 

It gets lonely and depressing no matter how strong your support system. You watch it wear on those you love and truthfully it was easier for me when I was the patient, rather than watching my boys ill. Your family will probably feel the same way. Make sure they get time away from you to do something fun. It's not fun to be left behind, but they will be much nicer for it.

 

I am thinking of you and praying for you in my own way.

[mrsred]

Beautiful quilt! What a great idea!

 

Best wishes for your surgery Sue! You'll be in our prayers!

 

Great news Kat! Glad to hear it!

 

~e

[Kat_in_Texas]

Oh Sue I'm so sorry about the tumor growth. As scared as you must be about your upcoming mastectomy, I bet you're also ready to get that out of your body. I will be praying that there are no further changes - exception TUMOR REDUCTION of course! - between now and your surgery date.

 

I like Nancy's tips about being in the hospital. My longest hospital stay was four days when I had my hysterectomy so I can't relate to long term stay. I hope the time will fly by for you. I'm sure you'll be the one who amazes the doctors and staff and gets to go home in record time!!! I'll be praying that for you as well.

 

Isn't it amazing how much better we feel when we stop to count our blessings?!? :D Thanks for sharing yours! Sometimes writing them down is a great outlet to remembering them as well! I know my afternoon's been much more peaceful than my morning ... when we put it all in the Master's hands it makes our own load seem so light.

 

I hope you enjoy(ed?) your nice meal out with hubby! Have a restful night!

[nybumpkin]

I've followed this thread for some time and haven't posted before - mostly because I'm so blown away by the strength, love and faith of all of you. You are truly inspiring. Thank you for sharing with us, and please know there are more prayers coming your way!

 

rbm, in-law visits can be stressful - I always went nuts cleaning before they visited, and still came home from work one day to find MIL standing on a ladder washing the outside of the windows:eek: ) - but your kids are so fortunate to be able to spend time with them and get to know them.

[ger_77]

Sue, I was finally able to open the picture of your quilt - it's gorgeous, and what a wonderful keepsake it is. My prayers are continuing for a speedy recovery from your upcoming surgery - I'll keep you in my heart through the days ahead.

 

Kat: You're having an ordinary day in the life of somebody who is grieving and trying to keep their life on an even keel. You stirred a memory with your "joyful that my parents have been reunited in heaven and are happy and whole" from when my Dad passed away. He had been widowed for 16 years and even though he was 92, I was terribly sad to not have him in my life any longer. A close cousin of mine came over at the funeral and said "I'm sorry Uncle Martin's not here any more, but can you imagine how wonderful it was for him to go to sleep and wake up in Heaven, next to Aunt Mary?(my Mom) Ever since that time, I've had moments of sadness, but also happiness at the thought of them being together, knowing we'll all be reunited again. Memories are the best thing to surround yourself with right now - bring out the photos, go through them, and embrace them. The grief never totally goes away, but it certainly gets easier to bear.

 

Blessings to all,

 

Smooth Sailing! :) :) :)

[kitty9]

Sue, to be perfectly honest, this whole thing for you sucks (sorry to be so pointed, but sometimes words like that just fit). But maybe I can let you in on some hopeful news.

 

My cousin was diagnosed with breast cancer when she was 44. She had a complete mastectomy and a brutal round of chemo. Then 8 years later, she found a lump in the other breast and again had the mastectomy and chemo. Four years later, she had cancer of the uterus, and spots were found on her colon and ovaries. Surgery again and then one year of chemo. She's now been cancer free for 6 years and doing great. So see, with hope and prayers even the most difficults cancers can be conquered. She had a new treatment involving stem cells that seems to have done the trick.

 

My prayers and hopes for a full recovery are going your way.

[patwell]

To Sue...I too have read these postings, from the dress thread thru this one and not posted....mainly because I didn't want to intrude but mostly because I've been in awe of the courage and support I've read in all these responses and didn't feel I had much to contribute. You, and the others of you who are facing such frightening challenges have been in my thoughts and prayers. With your surgery drawing near Sue, I just had to send you my prayers and healing energy for a positive outcome. I can only hope that if the day comes and I am faced with what some of you are dealing with that I can do so with the grace, courage, humor and tenacity that I've read here each day. And I can only hope that I will find the friendship and support that I've seen here too.

 

And thank you all for reminding us to count our blessings...it's so easy to be overwhelmed sometimes and lose sight of what's important.

 

God bless you Sue and may the power of prayer be with you and give you strength through what lies ahead. Best wishes, Penny

[KamloopsCruisers]

I know I have lots to be thankful for, but right now I am more than mad - there are words to describe how I'm feeling, but I don't think I should post them here or this beautiful long thread would be gone in a minute.

 

I called the hospital this afternoon (as I was instructed to) to find out the time of my surgery next week and when I needed to have blood work etc. done. Imagine my surprise when I was told - I don't see your name on the list. The woman transferred me to "bookings" where the phone just rang and rang and rang some more. Getting frustrated, I hung up and called the surgeon's office, who, of course, didn't answer my call either. A hasty call to the cancer clinic - this time I got voice mail!!!! Thankfully, the cancer clinic returned my call quickly, but she wasn't able to solve my problem. The nurse at the cancer clinic let me know that it is highly unusual not to have received pre-op calls from the hospital this soon to my surgery date and she would try to sort everything out tomorrow. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! I reminded her that my tumour is growing quickly and that I wanted it out sooner than later.

 

Just had to vent. Now all of you know that I am really human and not always positive and courageous - just majorily ticked off and cranky tonight.

 

Thanks for "listening". Hoping for good news in the morning.

[Kat_in_Texas]

I'm mad right along with you, Sue!!! What a mess about the scheduling, I will be keeping my fingers crossed (and saying some heavy-duty prayers!) that you find out in the morning that it was just an oversight and you're on the list and all is well. The last thing you need right now is RED TAPE! :mad: I'm really sorry this happened.

 

Anyway, can I also just say - thank God you're human! LOL! I was beginning to wonder .... :p

 

Just kidding! Big hugs to you, and please let us know tomorrow what you find out from the hospital. (Or tell us where to call ... they DO NOT want to have your CC fans after them! :D )

[jennew]

I check this thread from time to time. My prayers are with you all.

 

Kat, I loved your post about what you are thankful for. I too am thankful for my sweet Jesus, who has rescued me more than once.

 

You ladies are just amazing!

[Cats' slave]

Sue, if anyone deserves to vent, you do. I'm so sorry this is happening.

 

Kat, when I first found out Daddy was dying, I lost it. I cried and told God I wasn't strong enough to go through it. Then I became calm and I did so well. I cried very little and could even help others at the funeral. I noticed I was kind of numb but ....

 

Then about four months after Daddy died, the numbness wore off and I started full fledged grieving. Some little something would cut through and I'd start crying. It was so bad we had to leave a restaurant once. Another time I was performing in an orchestra in front of 15,000 people and it hit me. I had to leave the stage because I wasn't crying dainty little tears; I was choking and gagging and there were microphones all around me.

 

When Mother died a few years later, I knew what to expect. God gave me numbness to survive. And then he removed it bit by bit so I could grieve and go on.

 

You are so entitled to grieve. Go with it for now.

[rbm444]

I think we are all outraged and it is possible that this is a clerical error that be taken care of easily. For sure the surgeon has you on his/her schedule and will probably be the one to straighten this all out. Hey if it will help, I will make a call.

Please let us know what happens.

Ruth

[Nliedel]

Oh dear lord. That's horrible Sue. I'm going to be checking my mail all day for an update. Get your doctor involved right away. This is a huge mistake!

 

Cancer sucks. It's the most horrible thing and I just sit here and get so mad that it's happening to someone like you. That it happens to anyone. I've never thought about joining a cancer prevention group for my races before, but your story has me thinking that maybe it's time. I'm scared of asking for donations, but what's that fear next to someone like you who has this to face?

[Kat_in_Texas]

A friend just happened to forward this link last night. It's a very informative video report about inflammatory breast cancer. I had never even heard of IBC until I read Sue's original post here just a few weeks ago. Even though this type of cancer is thankfully rare, this is good information for all women to be aware of.

 

http://ww3.komotv.com/global/video/popup/pop_player.asp?ClipID1=785456

[dromMOM]

Hi ladies,

Grrrrrr! (How will I manage to be away from these boards for so long????)

 

Sue, I know you will miss the support on the boards. Just a suggestion though.. maybe a family member can highlight and copy and paste new posts on to a word document so he or she doesnt end up printing 30 pages. He could then bring you our words of encouragment. And maybe that family member can drop us a note from you. That way you will still feel the POWER of the support of this forum.

[tammyp5]

Goodness, Kat - that is a great clip. I'm forwarding it to my friends and family.

When I was going through my ordeal last year, not one doctor during the mammorgams, sonograms, xrays or exams mentioned a thing about IBC. I wonder if the MRI was programmed to look for that particular thing?

 

Hopefully, this kind of exposure will help women learn and be proactive on their own behalf.

 

Sue - take some warm fuzzy socks, your own quilt and comfy pillow (if they will allow it) and some photos of your family. If you have to be in the hospital that long, make it a home away from home. When my grandmother was in the hospital for weeks following a stroke, we also made sure she had wonderful aromatherapy products at the bedside (share with the nurses - they'll love it too). A journal to help you sort out your thoughts might be nice. Humor really helps - if you have a favorite comic strip, get a collection book of those and have it for the times you need to focus on something else.

 

I'm still praying for the extraordinary women of this thread.

 

Tammy

[Kat_in_Texas]

~ SUE ~

 

Any news on your surgery date/admittance info??? Just wondering if we need to start making those calls ... :p

 

Really, I hope all is well there. Hang in there Sue. I can't imagine what you must be feeling, both emotionally and physically. We all care so much, and I'm sure like the others we wish we could be there in person to help you and your family through this tough time! Heck, I'm ready to catch the next plane to Kamloops (as soon as this poor blonde Texan figures out what a Kamloops is and where it is! :D ). I'm already missing your posts ... it will be so quiet here while you're away! Do you think your DH would be willing to post an update on you when he has time after the surgery? You know we'll all be sitting on pins and needles to find out how you're feeling and how the operation went!

 

Sending you good vibes for good news and good rest this afternoon!!

[Kat_in_Texas]

I want to thank those of you who replied with encouragement and sharing about your own grieving process. I know it's been such a short time (just 7 weeks) since Mom died and I'm being too hard on myself for "still" having such a difficult time with it. Her death was unexpected, unlike my father's, who passed away in September after struggling with the effects of Parkinson's Disease for several years, and the shock of it all makes it harder to accept.

 

Actually I was just starting to truly accept Dad's passing when Mom died, I think. To have to "start all over" in the grieving process so soon just overwhelms me sometimes. I remember all too well the feelings that came at the two month mark, the four month, the six month ... it was so hard and as time passed I missed Dad more and more ... now I know I face that in grieving for my Mom. It scares me that these feelings I have now will only get more intense. But I know that's normal.

 

Mom and I had grown so close after Dad died and I just don't know what I'm going to do without her. I'm not even 50 yet and now have lost them both. I'm just so sad. My biggest problem is that I hate "giving in" to those sad feelings and as a result hold it in more than I should ... then when it comes out, it's like a volcano erupting.

 

All of this is normal I'm sure. I'm not worried about it not being a normal grieving process. I just don't want to do it!

 

Yes I know that I'll get through this, we all do with the help of God and the support of family and friends. And as I said yesterday, I'm filled with joy beyond measure that they are reunited and both are happy and whole again, and thanks to our Savior we will all be together one day for all eternity. I'm really so very grateful that my mother only had to be alone for 227 days. Those days were tough for her and it hurt my heart so much to know she was lonely and to be helpless to fix it for her. Now she's not lonely anymore, hallelujah, and my dad's not sick anymore. Perfect!

 

But dang it, I want them back!!!! :(

 

Again, NORMAL .... just hard. I know almost everyone here can relate in one way or another.

 

 

 

Okay I'm done rambling ... sheesh! Thanks for letting me. And again thanks for the encouragement. All of you are so sweet and caring, and it means the world to me.

[livelife]

Dear Kat that is too much for ANYONE to deal with in a short span, you have my empathy fully. It is nice we have places to go talk to others, loss is one thing I Really understand whatever the cause. Im sending tons of love and a hand to hold even if they are getting old and wrinkly, no wait I was BORN with them old and wrinkly (smile). Keep your faith, I have a deep one in God and the powers that be.

 

Many hugs and love

Live Life Jo