HELP Friend canceled entire cruise.

You'll have a blast! We've done "girls" cruises for many years and lately there has been only three of us. [started with seven] We usually email the maitre'd before hand and ask to be seated at a large table with other people and it's always worked out well, if that's your thing. Have a great time.

Correct. She claims she lost $400. Well I know how much I paid to her for my cruise, it was $400. So she didn't lose a thing, She lost my money, not hers.

There is an old saying "I loaned my friend $50 and have never seen him since....it was the best $50 I ever spent".

Imagine what drama you might have found yourself in had she gone on the cruise, or had you remained friends and were invited to her wedding, etc.

This $400 might be the best $400 you ever spent!

Yes, without a doubt we will be less stressed! That was the purpose of this cruise. To get away. Wasnt feeling like I was getting away from anything with the stress she was causing us.

An expensive lesson to learn that this woman is a terrible person. Probably well worth it in the end to never see or have to deal with her again.

Have a great time and consider it just a lesson learned in many ways--bad people aren't worth it and always control your own payments (pay with CC yourself)

I look forward to hearing about your great cruise!!!

I am so sorry for not getting back to ya'll. Here is "The Rest of the Story" Our plans to go on this cruise started a year ago. All was great for months! Then this spring, she met a MAN. She then started mentioning canceling for every little thing! Like, we wanted different color shirts, what we thought we wanted to do when we got to a port, she wanted us to dress alike on certain days, even had us buy 3 different outfits for this cruise to match each other, so when to wear what was an issue with her! It got to be beyond FUN any more. She picked the cruise, she picked the dates, she picked our clothes, she was trying to pick what we did while in ports, so when we didn't want to do the same things, she got mad! All We, the other 3 left still going on the cruise, say she was all along wanting to make us mad, and just looking for a reason to cancel so she can stay home with her new man! She has removed us from her friend's list on Facebook and blocked us. We have been able to look at her Facebook threw another friend to see what it looks like she isn't going to waste her vacation time that she had for our cruise Oct 13 th. She is getting married. Now, if she had just came out and told us all of this, that she would rather just stayed home with him and got married, we all could have still been friends. But NO, she had to be a drama queen and act like a teenager.

The other 3 of us are 53 years old and have moved me into their room. One other sided with our FRIEND and has also ended our friendship.

Thank you all for your advice. Yes, I am just out the $400. and Yes, I had to pay again to be added to the other room. Yes, I paid THIS time myself online!

I'm glad you are going on your cruise. I'm your age and still amazed that women still act like teenagers at this age. Matching outfits? Seriously? Have fun and just write this off, you will be better off in your heart if you do. I hope you have a great time!

I hope you decide to take her to small claims court to re-coup your $400 loss.

Just so that evil cloud doesn’t travel everywhere with y’all, I’d suggest a toast to her and good wishes for her happiness at the very beginning of the cruise, dispel her influence with kindness, and then NEVER mention her name - don’t allow her specter even on the ship. ENJOY your trip and time together - one rule we’ve always followed when traveling with friends is we’re not joined at the hip. Sometimes we don’t see anyone till time to meet for drinks before dinner. No stress.

Please write a trip report when you come back - would love to hear what a good time you had!

It may depend on whether Early Saver was used when the booking was made. If so and the room is cancelled the credit would partially still go back to each individual, regardless of who paid. We had one that was cancelled and each individual received a future credit on a cruise. Even though one person had actually paid for both spots.

I'm glad you are going on your cruise. I'm your age and still amazed that women still act like teenagers at this age. Matching outfits? Seriously? Have fun and just write this off, you will be better off in your heart if you do. I hope you have a great time!

Five women in their 50's with matching outfits....c'mon.

I think "the friend" was trying to politely cancel with all her demands but for some reason that I cannot comprehend, the others totally and completely missed "the social cues".

Well, if I were going on a cruise with a friend I'd explain in advance that we aren't tied at the hip, so if she even suggested matching outfits I'd be the first one out of that commitment.

What a bum! Sounds like her car may be in need of a set of new tires in the near future due to some unexplained nails.

Actually, not a set of tires because the insurance company will pay for it. I think she may need 3 new tires depending on her insurance deductible.

Since your other two friends in the cabin are sharing in your loss it would seem appropriate for the three of you to send her a nice wedding congratulations note confirming your $400 gift.

You’ll never see the money anyway.

There is an old saying "I loaned my friend $50 and have never seen him since....it was the best $50 I ever spent".

 

 

 

Imagine what drama you might have found yourself in had she gone on the cruise, or had you remained friends and were invited to her wedding, etc.

 

 

 

This $400 might be the best $400 you ever spent!

OP-

If you don’t get the money back think of the $400 as a wedding present. Could even let her know in a wedding card. A bit passive aggressive but does feel good [emoji56]

OP-

If you don’t get the money back think of the $400 as a wedding present. Could even let her know in a wedding card. A bit passive aggressive but does feel good [emoji56]

Oh, I would totally do this! Put a message saying something like “I was thinking and why don’t you just keep the $400 you owe me as a wedding gift and forget about paying me back.” Passively shove it in her face that you haven’t forgotten. [emoji6]

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Oh, I would totally do this! Put a message saying something like “I was thinking and why don’t you just keep the $400 you owe me as a wedding gift and forget about paying me back.” Passively shove it in her face that you haven’t forgotten. [emoji6]

 

 

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Thanks for putting words to my actions!

It is! I live in Florida and the weather is just starting to cool off a smidge and the humidity a little lower. Should be a grea time of year for you to visit the state and go cruising.

Hopefully it will start cooling off around here. We live in the Tampa area and we are still getting temperatures in the 90s every day. I moved to Florida for the warmer weather, but crazy that it is October and it still feels like the middle of July every day.

Thank you all for your wonderful ideas and replies. We all 3 LOVE the ones about the wedding gift card! In the end yes she has cost all 3 of us much pain , suffering, not to mention money in losses for my payments on the cruise, but also on the out fits she insisted we order. Yes we know it was a bit cheezy.

The three of us has thought of what we are going to do with those outfits now. One thought was to do a burning ceremony and video it and some how get it to her. We do have her mailing address.

We have thought about super extending our stay in Florida, just to maybe,, Um, go look her up ya know. I'm sure she will be gone on her honeymoon tho . Poor guy, we all now see why she has been married so many times.

Since we started planning this, in last October, she has been ,married, divorced, and getting married again! We used to think it was the men that she was choosing, now not so sure.

Thanks for the followups, and as others have said , it is an expensive lesson on choosing friends, though Im sure we have all done this, and there are far too many people out there who present themselves as the best friend you could ever find, and somewhere along the way, they show that they they have an ugly side Be grateful, that you all found out before you had invested too much of yourselves into a bad "friendship"

As for the "outfits". Im not sure if I missed it, or if you actually described them But if they are reasonably nice, just consider donating them to charity. There are always people who need clothes for various reasons, ie; fires, tornados, floods, hurricanes, and poverty in general. Someone may be able to use those outfits. Just an idea.

Enjoy your cruise whenever you get to do so, with your "real" friends.:)

Glad you are still able to go with your friends! Have a blast.

Have a great stress free cruise!:):):)

Five women in their 50's with matching outfits....c'mon.

I think "the friend" was trying to politely cancel with all her demands but for some reason that I cannot comprehend, the others totally and completely missed "the social cues".

Wait? What? This is how you politely cancel a cruise: "Hey everyone, sorry, I can't make the cruise anymore. Since it's my fault, I'll refund all the money you paid". You don't politely cancel by giving "social cues" such as suggesting excursions and outfits to wear and then taking someones money in a huff because they don't agree with you.

I'm sorry, if you're an adult, you should be able to politely talk to someone and verbalize your desires. I shouldn't have to parse through "social cues" to determine if someone wants to cancel, especially when people have paid you money for something. You don't get to shift blame because OMG, I gave them so many hints that I didn't want to go anymore.

Honestly, unless the outfits are dreadful, I'd wear them a bit and take cool photos of the rest of you in them at some pretty spot onboard or onshore - then post the heck out of the photos on social media so she can't help but see evidence of you having fun without her.

Perhaps make a sign that says "Official Ugly Outfit Cruise 2018" and pose with it?

Just a couple more delicious, passive aggressive suggestions for the 'bride'!

I will be doing the same thing when I retire. They are coworkers, not friends (unless you hang out with them all the time outside of work which I don't do).

I agree. When I retire, they will still be working. The common thread that tied us together is broken, there is no need to keep in touch. They are my part of my past and there they will stay.

"I'm too busy moving forward to look back!"

There were five of us booked in two separate rooms. I was in a room that the person that did the booking got mad and canceled our entire cabin. I still want to go with the others. Problem is, since I was in her cabin, I made my payments to her to pay for me, ( Like a fool I now see) Carnival shows, No payments from me! Therefore refunded ALL monies to her. Now, since yes, like a fool, I paid in in cash $400. But, I do have every text message between us showing the money being received from me. In order for me to go on with the remaining friends I would have to re pay for my cruise. Goes to show you, Never trust a friend, Even one of 40 years! Please if any of you seasoned cruiser's can give me helpful info, I'd really appreciate it.

Wounded in Ohio

Did you ask her for your portion of the refunded money?