Jerry and Shelly Posted October 6, 2010 #1 Share Posted October 6, 2010 Bon Voyage - Wifey and I are on Lawn sipping the WORST DRINK EVER, the Lawn Club Special, which consists of a cup of cucumber and a splash of gin, when wifey's cell phone rings. Voice on other end is our neighbor who is watching our house and wifey's 4 lb Yorkie. "Shelly, your house is making a rumbling noise, and there is water flowing out of your fireplace vent." Now I don't know much about home repair, but water coming out of a fireplace doesn't sound like a good thing. "And one other thing Shelly, your dog peed on my bed!" And let the trip begin . . . Formal Nights - We had second seating MDR. From my unscientific observations, on formal nights, 22% of men wore tuxedos, 37% wore suits, 33% wore sport jackets, and 8% opted to not wear a jacket. No men wore sombreros. And the women wore whatever they wanted. I saw at least two young, attrractive ladies wearing very tight and short hot pants with a sexy litlle top. I was not offended in the least bit . . . Dining - Food ranged from excellent to not excellent, mostly good. Wifey had to send a fish dish back because it was too gritty, said she felt like she was eating sand. Prime rib, rack of lamb, filets were excellent; sirloin and ribeye were dry and chewy. Note to self: double up on my cholesterol medicine . . . Drinks - Wifey and I debated on purchasing a beverage package, sure glad we didn't. Never went without a drink if we wanted one, and spent about a total of $300 on drinks. Brought 2 bottles of wine on board. Had FREE champagne or wine at least 5 times (welcome aboard, galley tour, anniversary party, captain's toast, 60's party.) Had FREE sample martinis twice at mixology events. Had FREE samples of many liquors at the liquor store sales event. $10 classic martinis at the martini bar included the shaker which amounted to an extra glass and half. $15 martini flights gave 6 mini-martinis. Our favorite was the tequila tasting - only 1 other person showed up besides us. Bartender gave a history of each tequila, which included 4 full shots of premium tequilas. Plus gave us an extra shot of the best 10 year tequila in the house, and then left us with the bottles. Had a couple more shots. Cost was $15.95 per person . . . Passengers - Ship was sold out. Observed only about 13 children on board. At the Black and White Party, ironically also observed about 13 gay men on board, which of course, leaves one odd man out . . . Ports - Rain and 9 foot swells forced us to miss the Grand Cayman stop. Went on ATV's in Cozumel. Had a blast spashing through hot mud which covered our legs. Cheaper than the same service at the spa. Finish the day shoppping. Went on mini rhino trip in Costa Maya. This was not at a mini zoo with mini giraffes and mini lions. Finshed the day in the port at the swimming pool and bar. Had drinks by the yard. Wifey stayed with mud slides. I had the Mexican Ice Tea, which consisted of Tequila, Gin, Vodka, Rum, anyhting else on top of the bar, and a shot of gasoline. Took a city tour of Roatan. After, went on a walk in pouring rain to find a post office - that was an adventure . . . Entertainment - This is not las Vegas, this is not Broadway, this is a cruise ship - with that, entertainment was good and plentiful. We went to 4 of the shows in the main theater, and went to 4 dance parties. Every lounge that we stopped in for a drink had nighttime entertainment. The party band was fun. Never made it to the midnight comedy show but heard he was hilarious, got too sleepy by then. The cooking show was funny and enjoyable, and the Hot Glass Show is a must. Lots to see and do, just don't know how anyone can complain that there is not enough entertainment on board . . . Casino - Wifey and I did pretty good the first 6 days, slots were paying, and wifey was on a hot streak on roulette. Tried bingo once, and wifey won the first game played. But we should have stayed out of the casino on the seventh day because they gave us a big ouchy . . . Had a great time. Any questions? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LouisV Posted October 6, 2010 #2 Share Posted October 6, 2010 Hey Jerry! thanks for the great review and very entertaining to hear your take on things....I bet :Dyou would make a great table mate! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocJohnB Posted October 6, 2010 #3 Share Posted October 6, 2010 Thanks for the light-hearted review. One question though. Any possibility the Yorkie somehow plugged up the fireplace prior to your departure. They are devious little devils . . . . look at what it did to the neighbor's bed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CathyCruises Posted October 6, 2010 #4 Share Posted October 6, 2010 Remind me to stay away from the Lawn Club Special--yuck! Thanks for a fun review, can't wait till I get to see for myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
madelinerose Posted October 6, 2010 #5 Share Posted October 6, 2010 Love your review, Jerry. Thanks. ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yayvacation! Posted October 6, 2010 #6 Share Posted October 6, 2010 Hilarious. What happened with the fireplace gushing water? Thanks for the review I'm checking "lawn club special" off my list! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
txsloth Posted October 6, 2010 #7 Share Posted October 6, 2010 Nice review--thanks! Oddly the worst drink I've ever had on a cruise was also in the Lawn Club--something with muddled blueberries in it...yech. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jerry and Shelly Posted October 6, 2010 Author #8 Share Posted October 6, 2010 For those who asked about our house mishap -- a water pipe in the crawl space under the house busted at the shut-off valve. We contacted our son-in-law, and he had the city shut the water. There was about 3' of standing water in our crawlspace, and some of it made it out through the fireplace. Had a disaster clean-up, plumber fixed the pipe, and getting HVAC vents repaired tomorrow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scf1270 Posted October 6, 2010 #9 Share Posted October 6, 2010 fun review! thanks :D glad the problems at home are repairable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rare Alsmez Posted October 6, 2010 #10 Share Posted October 6, 2010 Passengers - Ship was sold out. Observed only about 13 children on board. At the Black and White Party, ironically also observed about 13 gay men on board, which of course, leaves one odd man out . . . Apparently you don't know gay men very well. :D Glad you had a great cruise! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
constantcruiser Posted October 6, 2010 #11 Share Posted October 6, 2010 We were on the Solstice last month and agree it's a fabulous ship. Loved your review, but it begs one more question....did you have to buy your neighbor a new mattress?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bighairtexan Posted October 6, 2010 #12 Share Posted October 6, 2010 First of all, BEST REVIEW...... EVER! Thanks. I sail on the Solstice on Sunday. Apparently you don't know gay men very well. :D Glad you had a great cruise! LMAO...... Too funny!! :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gonzo70 Posted October 6, 2010 #13 Share Posted October 6, 2010 Thanks for the review; very enjoyable reading. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BamaD Posted October 6, 2010 #14 Share Posted October 6, 2010 Excellent review. Mudslide? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jerry and Shelly Posted October 6, 2010 Author #15 Share Posted October 6, 2010 Excellent review. Mudslide? It's a frozen drink made with (I think) Kaluha, Bailey's, ice cream, and chocolate syrup. Maybe something else also, but no mud. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jerry and Shelly Posted October 6, 2010 Author #16 Share Posted October 6, 2010 We were on the Solstice last month and agree it's a fabulous ship. Loved your review, but it begs one more question....did you have to buy your neighbor a new mattress?? I think the blankets kept it under control, and (hopefully) they got washed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rare Lois R Posted October 6, 2010 #17 Share Posted October 6, 2010 It's a frozen drink made with (I think) Kaluha, Bailey's, ice cream, and chocolate syrup. Maybe something else also, but no mud. Kahluah, Baileys and Vodka:D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmagee Posted October 6, 2010 #18 Share Posted October 6, 2010 Jerry, thanks for the great review. Tell me more about the Black and White party you mentioned. Do I need to rethink our wardrobe? Leaving on Sunday. Thanks. Marilyn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocJohnB Posted October 6, 2010 #19 Share Posted October 6, 2010 For those who asked about our house mishap -- a water pipe in the crawl space under the house busted at the shut-off valve. We contacted our son-in-law, and he had the city shut the water. There was about 3' of standing water in our crawlspace, and some of it made it out through the fireplace. Had a disaster clean-up, plumber fixed the pipe, and getting HVAC vents repaired tomorrow. So then if I understand you, the Yorkie is off the hook and is still feeding at your table? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gracie115 Posted October 6, 2010 #20 Share Posted October 6, 2010 Great review..sorry about the water pipe mishap....loved your take on entertainment......Solstice is a wonderful ship!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JanineM Posted October 6, 2010 #21 Share Posted October 6, 2010 Great review! We were on Solstice the week before you. And we missed ALL of the shows except the cooking & hot glass. Now I'm wishing I hit at least one! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jerry and Shelly Posted October 6, 2010 Author #22 Share Posted October 6, 2010 Jerry, thanks for the great review. Tell me more about the Black and White party you mentioned. Do I need to rethink our wardrobe? Leaving on Sunday. Thanks. Marilyn Theme dance parties: Tuesday night - "Groove" 60's party in the Grand Foyer Wednesday night - "Sizzle" Latin party poolside Thusday night - "Balck & White" 80's party in the Sky Lounge Friday night - "Disco" 70's party in the Sky Lounge Saturday night - "Farewell" party in the Grand Foyer No need to over-do the wardrobe, but I did see several people and one zebra in black and white outfits. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
riandei Posted October 6, 2010 #23 Share Posted October 6, 2010 Great review Luv ur sense of humor Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paulsang Posted October 7, 2010 #24 Share Posted October 7, 2010 Apparently you don't know gay men very well. :D Glad you had a great cruise! ROTFLMFAO!!!!!:eek: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jerry and Shelly Posted October 7, 2010 Author #25 Share Posted October 7, 2010 Great review! We were on Solstice the week before you. And we missed ALL of the shows except the cooking & hot glass. Now I'm wishing I hit at least one! The Cirque-style show on first formal night was the most unique show, but if you have seen a Las Vegas Cirque show, then this may be a let down. Just due to the immense scale in LV compared to the very small scale on the ship. The other two production shows were enjoyable - singing and dancing. We missed the singing impressionist, but heard he was very good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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