Very Disturbing

[brazilgirl]

Maybe this has been previously discussed , but it´s in the news again today...

 

I am going to discuss it with my 13 yr old , who enjoys going to the preteen activites .

 

http://www.cruiselawnews.com/2010/02/articles/sexual-assault-of-minors/passenger-indicted-for-sexual-abuse-of-13-year-old-girl-on-disney-wonder-cruise-ship/

[Carolin]

Cruise ships are small contained cities with people from every walk of life. Assuming it is "safe" is not realistic. Personal safety is just as important on the ship as in your home town. Kids as well as adults need to keep thier eyes and ears open at all times. Don't go into other people's cabins unless they are family. Don't wander around on deck at 3am by yourself. Do not go into crew areas. Don't sit on the balcony rail trying to make a funny picture. etc... Have a safe and fun cruise.

[chipmaster]

Well said actually when on vacation one needs to IMHO be even more aware as most let their guard down on vacation, and likely especially more so in the mouse enviroment, sadly.

 

Cruise ships are small contained cities with people from every walk of life. Assuming it is "safe" is not realistic. Personal safety is just as important on the ship as in your home town. Kids as well as adults need to keep thier eyes and ears open at all times. Don't go into other people's cabins unless they are family. Don't wander around on deck at 3am by yourself. Do not go into crew areas. Don't sit on the balcony rail trying to make a funny picture. etc... Have a safe and fun cruise.

[sngleme121]

I guess I am just paranoid because I wouldn't let my 13 year old go off on his/her own on a cruise or anywhere. I wouldn't enjoy my vacation if I couldn't see where my child was at all times.

 

On the flip side though we know times are diff now because back in the '70s my mom took our family to WDW when my older brother was 13 and we never saw him except at meal times. He was off doing his own thing the entire time and he said it was best time he ever had. That was then...and this is now...which is really so sad.

[donaldsc]

I guess I am just paranoid because I wouldn't let my 13 year old go off on his/her own on a cruise or anywhere. I wouldn't enjoy my vacation if I couldn't see where my child was at all times.

 

On the flip side though we know times are diff now because back in the '70s my mom took our family to WDW when my older brother was 13 and we never saw him except at meal times. He was off doing his own thing the entire time and he said it was best time he ever had. That was then...and this is now...which is really so sad.

 

Obviously, if this sort of thing happens just once, it is horrible. Also, I am sure that if my daughters were still young and at home, I would worry about it.

 

That said, I would bet that the occurrence of such things is probably no more frequent now than it was 30, 50, or 100 years ago. When I was about 15 years old, my parents let me and 2 of my friends go alone on a 2 week bike trip in Northern NJ. We stayed at prearranged places and had to call in every night but we did go by ourselves. What parent would allow that now? If they did, they probably would be arrested for child endangerment.

 

The difference is that with the internet, cable TV news that needs to fill a 24 hour day with news when there is none, and other new forms of communications, we hear about such events more. This gives us the perception that it is happening all the time.

 

I have no idea where to find real statistics on these crimes but I would love to see them.

 

DON

[jerin]

I don't see the cruise ship as any different from the large public park that our house backs to. I'm never sure exactly who is going to be in either place, and we all need to act accordingly. My kids are free to go out on their own, as long as I know where they're going, but they MUST stay in groups of at least two, can't talk to strangers, etc. ... common sense that needs to be there on land or at sea, and if I didn't trust my children to follow my safety guidelines, I'd keep them with me.

[CanadianTwosome]

I think many people don't stop to think about the fact that all the things that appeal to us on ships because they're family oriented are also beacons to pedophiles that there WILL be children on board. A registered sex offender might get in trouble if they're caught near a park or school grounds, but can they be prevented from booking a holiday? Are they required to inform the cruiseline or resort, or their fellow guests?

 

I go on every cruise, and to every family oriented resort and theme park, with the expectation that someone unscrupulous will at the very least be LOOKING at my child. I have no doubt whatsoever that the gorgeous picture of the sweet child taken on formal night has not just been admired innocently by their fellow passengers, but has been ogled by someone with much darker interests. (I think I even remember reading a post once about a man who bought someone else's child's photo) I also believe that most of the time, these individuals are completely harmless; that they've seen and taken an opportunity to LOOK at kids and youth, but do not act on any impulse to touch them. Mind you, I think pretty much the same thing about the mall.

 

The important thing to remember is that our children need rules, and they need to be prepared for potentially dangerous situations. A lot can be avoided by providing supervision, setting schedules, and ensuring that nobody is ever wandering around alone or in groups without someone old enough to be responsible. The incident described in the link involved a group of teens whose parents surely thought were safe in a group, however, so there are no guarantees.

 

So... now that I've been all doomy and gloomy, I really don't spend my vacation thinking my child is in danger 24/7. I just accept that there are people in the world that do not have her best interests at heart and have done everything in my power to prepare her and plan with safety in mind for all of us. Adults can be assaulted, too. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure... or therapy. :cool:

[andiloveu]

I think many people don't stop to think about the fact that all the things that appeal to us on ships because they're family oriented are also beacons to pedophiles that there WILL be children on board. A registered sex offender might get in trouble if they're caught near a park or school grounds, but can they be prevented from booking a holiday? Are they required to inform the cruiseline or resort, or their fellow guests?

 

I go on every cruise, and to every family oriented resort and theme park, with the expectation that someone unscrupulous will at the very least be LOOKING at my child. I have no doubt whatsoever that the gorgeous picture of the sweet child taken on formal night has not just been admired innocently by their fellow passengers, but has been ogled by someone with much darker interests. (I think I even remember reading a post once about a man who bought someone else's child's photo) I also believe that most of the time, these individuals are completely harmless; that they've seen and taken an opportunity to LOOK at kids and youth, but do not act on any impulse to touch them. Mind you, I think pretty much the same thing about the mall.

 

The important thing to remember is that our children need rules, and they need to be prepared for potentially dangerous situations. A lot can be avoided by providing supervision, setting schedules, and ensuring that nobody is ever wandering around alone or in groups without someone old enough to be responsible. The incident described in the link involved a group of teens whose parents surely thought were safe in a group, however, so there are no guarantees.

 

So... now that I've been all doomy and gloomy, I really don't spend my vacation thinking my child is in danger 24/7. I just accept that there are people in the world that do not have her best interests at heart and have done everything in my power to prepare her and plan with safety in mind for all of us. Adults can be assaulted, too. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure... or therapy. :cool:

I agree with you wholeheartedly. It is better to be safe than sorry when it comes to our children.

[crusinmama06]

Yeah where is that thread that asked if they are being "overprotective" -- um, ask the parents of that young teen girl. I bet they wish they would have been more "overprotective" :(

[cb at sea]

Always teach your kids to APPROACH a stranger....not "creepy" ones...but let them know if they need help, they CAN and SHOULD seek it out....your kids need to know that ALL strangers are not out to hurt them!

 

Do you remember the child who was lost on a boy scout trip? He was almost found DAYS and DAYS before, but his rescuers would call out, and he was afraid to reveal himself! You don't want to scare your kids so much that they are afraid to ask for help!

Teach them that their "gut instinct" is ok...if someone seems ok to ask for assistance...trust the gut!

[Naomi John]

I think many people don't stop to think about the fact that all the things that appeal to us on ships because they're family oriented are also beacons to pedophiles that there WILL be children on board. A registered sex offender might get in trouble if they're caught near a park or school grounds, but can they be prevented from booking a holiday? Are they required to inform the cruiseline or resort, or their fellow guests?

 

Can give a somewhat informed answer to the above. If they are still under probation/parole supervision, in ceratin states, they would have to get permission from a court/parole board, their suprevising officer and notify local law enforcement of ANY out of state travel plans. Now, do they? Some do, some don't. The key phrase is "if they get caught". And there is nothing local law enforcement can do except put GPS monitor's on these guys for life, which they are not financially able to do. A flag on a Driver's License and Passport can also help.

 

So yes, they can be prevented from "booking a holiday". Sort of.

[Onessa]

There are creeps all over. There are also creeps who may be on board your next cruise who are not pedephiles but simply just creeps -- so just because YOU are an adult, you are not immune either.

 

Remember (and let your kids know):

1) there is some safety in numbers.

2) there are some places that you want to avoid at all times or maybe at certain times.

3) let your kids know it is OK to ask for help. If your kid is alone and needs help - they should know to find a mom with kids, a mixed gender couple, someone in a uniform - and make sure they know it is ok to ask for help.

And while your at it Let yourself know it is ok to ask for help too!

4) if they (or you) do need help or are just creeped out, look for as public of a place as you can. Don't let anyone take you to a private room or secluded place. Don't let anyone separate you from your friends.

 

Thinking through situations before hand makes it easier to react if the situation actually occurs.

 

It made me warm and fuzzy when I was at the grocery store and had a little boy approach me to tell me his mom was lost and that he needed help. He explained that his mom told him to look for another mom if she ever got lost -- he did not see any other moms with kids but he thought that maybe I kind of looked like one :D! My DH was not far behind me so I had him go to get help and the boy and I sat on the floor by my cart and waited - DH found a woman who looked rather frantic on his way to the front desk and all ended we.

 

We all have to remember that helping others makes US feel good about ourselves -- so when we need help, we shouldn't be shy about asking for it.

[tkportersat]

Yeah, I was allowed to go to the beach about 5 hours away for Spring Break while in HS; most folks would drive to Mexico at night to party. This was about the time that young folks were disappearing in Matamoras. I think most of us were ages 15-18. I wouldn't even think of letting my kids do that! I look back and think how lucky we were that nothing bad ever happened. :o

 

Obviously, if this sort of thing happens just once, it is horrible. Also, I am sure that if my daughters were still young and at home, I would worry about it.

 

That said, I would bet that the occurrence of such things is probably no more frequent now than it was 30, 50, or 100 years ago. When I was about 15 years old, my parents let me and 2 of my friends go alone on a 2 week bike trip in Northern NJ. We stayed at prearranged places and had to call in every night but we did go by ourselves. What parent would allow that now? If they did, they probably would be arrested for child endangerment.

 

The difference is that with the internet, cable TV news that needs to fill a 24 hour day with news when there is none, and other new forms of communications, we hear about such events more. This gives us the perception that it is happening all the time.

 

I have no idea where to find real statistics on these crimes but I would love to see them.

 

DON

[Bound4Bermuda]

Always teach your kids to APPROACH a stranger....not "creepy" ones...but let them know if they need help, they CAN and SHOULD seek it out....your kids need to know that ALL strangers are not out to hurt them!

 

Do you remember the child who was lost on a boy scout trip? He was almost found DAYS and DAYS before, but his rescuers would call out, and he was afraid to reveal himself! You don't want to scare your kids so much that they are afraid to ask for help!

Teach them that their "gut instinct" is ok...if someone seems ok to ask for assistance...trust the gut!

 

How do you/they know whether or not a person is "creepy" just by looking at him? Wasn't serial killer Ted Bundy known for being handsome and charming? I would say that the most useful advice would be to advise the child to go up to somone with a name tag who works there, but after reading about this employee abusing that poor girl, I guess you never know! Perhaps advising to go to a FEMALE with a nametag since they're much less likely to have "creepy" motives.

 

As for the boy scout story, didn't he have autism? I'm sure that played a larger role in him not responding than being told not to talk to strangers.

[cruisincarly]

Obviously, if this sort of thing happens just once, it is horrible. Also, I am sure that if my daughters were still young and at home, I would worry about it.

 

That said, I would bet that the occurrence of such things is probably no more frequent now than it was 30, 50, or 100 years ago. When I was about 15 years old, my parents let me and 2 of my friends go alone on a 2 week bike trip in Northern NJ. We stayed at prearranged places and had to call in every night but we did go by ourselves. What parent would allow that now? If they did, they probably would be arrested for child endangerment.

 

The difference is that with the internet, cable TV news that needs to fill a 24 hour day with news when there is none, and other new forms of communications, we hear about such events more. This gives us the perception that it is happening all the time.

 

I have no idea where to find real statistics on these crimes but I would love to see them.

 

DON

 

The overall rate of sexual assault (including rape) in 2008 was about the same as it was in 1976 (about 30 assaults per 100 000 people). There was a large increase in assault rates between 1960 (10 in 100 000) and 1992 (45 in 100 000), and the rate has been falling steadily since 1992. These are justice department statistics.

 

When thinking about these stats, however, we should keep in mind three things:

 

1 - this is *reported* sexual assaults, and levels of reporting have changed due to changing norms regarding crimes of a sexual nature -- i.e. the levels of reporting are higher today than they were in the 60's and 70's due to a lessened taboo surrounding reporting.

 

2 - The vast majority -- over 80% -- of sexual assaults are not "stranger" assaults, but rather assaults by someone whom the victim knows. This means that the rate of stranger assaults is about 6 in 100 000. That is, very rare.

 

3 - This rate includes all victims, and victims are most likely to be women aged 18-24.

 

None of this is to say that one shouldn't take precautions. One should teach kids to be wary of strangers, what to do in case of danger, etc. All of these are good things to do, and each parent has a right to parent in the way that the see fit.

 

But it one should also bear in mind how extremely rare incidents like this are, and how the media disproportionately reports "sensationalistic" cases like the ones on cruise ships.

[brazilgirl]

Great post , cruisincarly.

[CanadianTwosome]

The overall rate of sexual assault (including rape) in 2008 was about the same as it was in 1976 (about 30 assaults per 100 000 people). There was a large increase in assault rates between 1960 (10 in 100 000) and 1992 (45 in 100 000), and the rate has been falling steadily since 1992. These are justice department statistics.

 

When thinking about these stats, however, we should keep in mind three things:

 

1 - this is *reported* sexual assaults, and levels of reporting have changed due to changing norms regarding crimes of a sexual nature -- i.e. the levels of reporting are higher today than they were in the 60's and 70's due to a lessened taboo surrounding reporting.

 

2 - The vast majority -- over 80% -- of sexual assaults are not "stranger" assaults, but rather assaults by someone whom the victim knows. This means that the rate of stranger assaults is about 6 in 100 000. That is, very rare.

 

3 - This rate includes all victims, and victims are most likely to be women aged 18-24.

 

None of this is to say that one shouldn't take precautions. One should teach kids to be wary of strangers, what to do in case of danger, etc. All of these are good things to do, and each parent has a right to parent in the way that the see fit.

 

But it one should also bear in mind how extremely rare incidents like this are, and how the media disproportionately reports "sensationalistic" cases like the ones on cruise ships.

 

While I agree, I'll bet the low rate of incidence, reported or not, is absolutely no consolation to the individuals who have been assaulted, or their parents and other loved ones.

 

As I noted in my prior post, I don't walk around expecting every stranger to be a creep or a pedophile. I just know that they're out there, and if there's a 0.0000000000001% chance that my child is at risk, that's enough of a chance that it's worth some advance preparation.

 

I discussed this story with my daughter last night, and we talked about what the girl might have done differently (not blaming the girl, just wishing she'd been more prepared - and suspicious). Not separating from her friends was a big one, especially at the urging of a strange man. Assuming it's time to go, though, in a case where a group has to go back to different cabins, we agreed that they should go to each one in turn, and pick up a parent or a crewmember along the way to escort the last one to her cabin. Also, based on how I interpreted the story, the girl started out inside and was taken outside... if the man was 'talking her into it', she should have refused, and if he was forcing her, she should have screamed. I've instructed my daughter that if she should find herself threatened by someone on board and doesn't see a means of escape, she should scream and bang on doors and make as much noise as she can. Any person attempting a crime in a confined area like a cruise ship will bolt if that happens - he may be able to deny one distraught person's identification in a dark corner of a deck, but if just one person opens their cabin door and catch him in the act, he's done, and it's not like he can leave town. I can't imagine any passenger except the most callous being upset about being awoken by someone in distress.

 

Again, I don't believe it's likely to happen. I just think it's very important to be aware that there is a percentage of our society who are not safe for one reason or another, and the passengers on a cruise are a cross section of that society. They're on board with us, and the incident linked here is an example that they don't always just sit by and 'enjoy the show'. It's ALWAYS best to be prepared. Discussing things like this before a holiday means that except in the most isolated of incidents, nobody has to even think about it once you're off relaxing and enjoying yourselves.

 

If we are prepared for dangers in our lives, we can live it as if there are none. :)

[cruisincarly]

While I agree, I'll bet the low rate of incidence, reported or not, is absolutely no consolation to the individuals who have been assaulted, or their parents and other loved ones.

 

As I noted in my prior post, I don't walk around expecting every stranger to be a creep or a pedophile. I just know that they're out there, and if there's a 0.0000000000001% chance that my child is at risk, that's enough of a chance that it's worth some advance preparation.

 

I discussed this story with my daughter last night, and we talked about what the girl might have done differently (not blaming the girl, just wishing she'd been more prepared - and suspicious). Not separating from her friends was a big one, especially at the urging of a strange man. Assuming it's time to go, though, in a case where a group has to go back to different cabins, we agreed that they should go to each one in turn, and pick up a parent or a crewmember along the way to escort the last one to her cabin. Also, based on how I interpreted the story, the girl started out inside and was taken outside... if the man was 'talking her into it', she should have refused, and if he was forcing her, she should have screamed. I've instructed my daughter that if she should find herself threatened by someone on board and doesn't see a means of escape, she should scream and bang on doors and make as much noise as she can. Any person attempting a crime in a confined area like a cruise ship will bolt if that happens - he may be able to deny one distraught person's identification in a dark corner of a deck, but if just one person opens their cabin door and catch him in the act, he's done, and it's not like he can leave town. I can't imagine any passenger except the most callous being upset about being awoken by someone in distress.

 

Again, I don't believe it's likely to happen. I just think it's very important to be aware that there is a percentage of our society who are not safe for one reason or another, and the passengers on a cruise are a cross section of that society. They're on board with us, and the incident linked here is an example that they don't always just sit by and 'enjoy the show'. It's ALWAYS best to be prepared. Discussing things like this before a holiday means that except in the most isolated of incidents, nobody has to even think about it once you're off relaxing and enjoying yourselves.

 

If we are prepared for dangers in our lives, we can live it as if there are none. :)

 

 

I agree completely. Just because the chance of getting struck by lightning is low, that doesn't mean I'm going to stand under a big tree during a thunderstorm. Just because the rate of stranger sexual assault is rather low, that doesn't mean I wouldn't prepare my child for that rare situation. Conversations like the one you mention above are vital to ensure the safety of our children, and I'm glad you could speak so frankly to your daughter.

 

I simply mean to point out that the world isn't actually much more dangerous than it was when many of us were kids (in fact it's considerably safer than when *I* was a kid in the late 80's/early 90's), and that it's not very useful to keep repeating that it is. I also think it doesn't do us much good to be constantly in fear of other people, on land or at sea, and so it's useful to keep these statistics in mind. In fact, I would probably add to your, again, admirable conversation above, that the chance of something like this happening is low. I wouldn't want my child to think that everyone is out to get them (not that your child thinks that, of course!).

 

(I also couldn't help it, having just that morning taught a class on crime & punishment in America and, therefore, having the stats right at my fingertips! ;) )

[CanadianTwosome]

I agree completely. Just because the chance of getting struck by lightning is low, that doesn't mean I'm going to stand under a big tree during a thunderstorm. Just because the rate of stranger sexual assault is rather low, that doesn't mean I wouldn't prepare my child for that rare situation. Conversations like the one you mention above are vital to ensure the safety of our children, and I'm glad you could speak so frankly to your daughter.

 

I simply mean to point out that the world isn't actually much more dangerous than it was when many of us were kids (in fact it's considerably safer than when *I* was a kid in the late 80's/early 90's), and that it's not very useful to keep repeating that it is. I also think it doesn't do us much good to be constantly in fear of other people, on land or at sea, and so it's useful to keep these statistics in mind. In fact, I would probably add to your, again, admirable conversation above, that the chance of something like this happening is low. I wouldn't want my child to think that everyone is out to get them (not that your child thinks that, of course!).

 

(I also couldn't help it, having just that morning taught a class on crime & punishment in America and, therefore, having the stats right at my fingertips! ;) )

 

It appears that you and I think a lot alike. The part about this not being likely to occur but me needing to feel confident that she will know how to react was part of our discussion. :)

 

I also agree completely that the world isn't any less dangerous, we just have more information and awareness. How many times did you hear the phrase 'a boy could take advantage' from your parents? Now it's called 'date rape'. As for pedophiles, my mother has told me of an incident that happened at Regina Beach (read TINY community in Saskatchewan) when I was two (1967): She was at the beach with my sister (4) and I, and noticed that every time I walked one way on the beach, a man would do the same; every time I went in or out of the water, he was there, ever so often glancing over at her (no doubt to see if she'd stopped paying attention to me). Finally, she was just too uncomfortable and packed us up and took us home to the cottage, and the man actually followed her about a third of the way before disappearing.

 

Like I keep saying though, I am not an alarmist at all. I rarely think about this sort of thing, but I believe that's because I've taken the time to focus on it long enough to prepare myself and my daughter for what will hopefully never happen. (my husband doesn't need any prepping - he's ex-RCMP :p) Prepare for the worst and expect the best!!

 

Interestingly, I think it's this attitude that allows my family to enjoy our holidays to the fullest, even when everything doesn't go perfectly. Not enough towels? AC issues? Errant charge that needs to be removed from my on board account? These are minor inconveniences at worst, and so much easier to take when experienced on a cruise ship! :)

[kassimer1]

On a side note. I do know my 15 yr old knows what to do if approched by a pervert because this happened in walmart. he was looking at video games and we went to get cat food. He was approched by and older nam ( greying hair) and asked about his cell phome because the guy saud he wanted to buy oone. the conversation then turned to what age is my son and would he like to go bowling!!! My son pretended to get a text from us and came find us. I am so thankful he knew what to do. He said "mom, I know what that man wanted from watching law and order SVU with you guys" It wasnt the talks we gave but something he saw on TV. Walmart was to slow to get security and the man left the store so he is still out there. I feel so bad for that poor girl and for all the others it has happened to.

[CruisinIsMyThang]

The most disturbing part is that this child's parents were allowing her to wander around a cruise ship at 13 y/o in the middle of the night. If you were in a hotel that had a lot of clubs, resteraunts, etc attached to it, would you allow your vulnerable preteen child wander around? Probably not.. This is very sad that this would occur, but you shouldn't worry about your children if you are watching them and taking care of them. I am taking my 7 y/o DD on her first cruise this summer, and pedophiles are the least of my worries (I won't allow her to be alone to have this issue), my issues are more of making sure she doesn't get sunburned and that she has the time of her life.

[reallyexcited]

when we cruised in 2003 ( me Dh and our 13month old) we were very delayed getting off the ship b/c they were trying to locate someone "accused" of rape ..apparently the girl had come forward that morning and they kept paging this guy/family and he finally came forward after hours and hours...we made our flight but many missed theirs!!

 

we saw him taken away off the ship!!!

[beachluvr65]

There are creeps all over. There are also creeps who may be on board your next cruise who are not pedephiles but simply just creeps -- so just because YOU are an adult, you are not immune either.

 

Remember (and let your kids know):

1) there is some safety in numbers.

2) there are some places that you want to avoid at all times or maybe at certain times.

3) let your kids know it is OK to ask for help. If your kid is alone and needs help - they should know to find a mom with kids, a mixed gender couple, someone in a uniform - and make sure they know it is ok to ask for help.

And while your at it Let yourself know it is ok to ask for help too!

4) if they (or you) do need help or are just creeped out, look for as public of a place as you can. Don't let anyone take you to a private room or secluded place. Don't let anyone separate you from your friends.

 

Thinking through situations before hand makes it easier to react if the situation actually occurs.

 

It made me warm and fuzzy when I was at the grocery store and had a little boy approach me to tell me his mom was lost and that he needed help. He explained that his mom told him to look for another mom if she ever got lost -- he did not see any other moms with kids but he thought that maybe I kind of looked like one :D! My DH was not far behind me so I had him go to get help and the boy and I sat on the floor by my cart and waited - DH found a woman who looked rather frantic on his way to the front desk and all ended we.

 

We all have to remember that helping others makes US feel good about ourselves -- so when we need help, we shouldn't be shy about asking for it.

 

Onessa

 

I take offense to you telling parents to tell their children to find a 'mixed gendered couple' as if same sex couples would harm a child simply because they are not a mixed gendered couple. It is prejudgmental thinking like that which perpetuates the stereotypes? Ask Elizabeth Smart how the mixed gendered coupled help her be a captive.

[mksgfly]

Our whole family is going on our first cruise soon. 14 of us. I have given a lot of thought to setting up safety rules for my daughter. She's will be 12 and already looks 14... Kids that age can sign themselves out of the kids club. She has a cell phone which I will have her text me with. I just ordered a panic alarm with a pin, not a button. The pin has to be put back in before it will stop going off. They will allow that on the ship, right? I'm just not comfortable with the idea of her being in an elevator or a hall way all alone even during the day time. I am convinced that finally I will decide she has to be with someone from our family to get from place to place. I can't really count on her older cousins to be around, they always have better things to do. Of course the rest of my family, including my DH, will think I'm being ridiculously over-protective. I don't let her go to the park behing my house alone. Why would I let her roam a ship "ie:small city with many closed doors" alone?

[jnolan3199]

My first cruise was on Carnival when I was 15 (15 years ago). I don't recall there being any teens or kids clubs for me to join, so I basically had my run of the ship. While it's been several years ago, I do remember being hit on and flirted with inappropriately by several of the crew members. I remember being kissed and asked to meet after hours in a crew members room. I don't recall there being a lot of kids my age around so hanging with younger crew members (20's) seemed really fun.

 

I'm only recalling this now because I wanted parents to remember that just because your child can't go anywhere and are confined to a ship, there can be a false sense of safety on cruise ships. I'm sure my parents thought I couldn't possibly get into any trouble. While nothing "happened" on the cruise, if I had been a little less scared of getting in trouble, a lot could have happened.

 

So, be on the look out for not only other passenger, but the crew as well.