Worried re: clothes.

[Ladypop]

I'm not exactly sure if this is the right place, but here goes. We're cruising for the first time in November this year, to Fiji. Myself, hubby and two sons 13 and 18 . Myself and both sons have Aspergers, so between us we have quite a few sensitivities, some to noise, some to crowds, some to clothes. Most of these we can and do deal with on a daily basis with out anyone around us realising or feeling uncomfortable. My husband, bless his heart, just goes along with our occasional quirks and "aspie-isms" as part of the ride. We love him, he's a keeper :D. My big concern is clothes. I dress like my sons. T shirts and fishermans pants or yoga pants, for the most part. I sometimes wear a beanie even in hot weather, if my sensitivities are getting hard to handle. Something about having my head covered is a big calming down thing for me. Will this be an issue? I can and do wear dresses and formal clothes, and may even do so on the formal night. BUT, if I'm having a bit of an overwhelming day, I'd like to be able to wear my mufti without feeling like the village idiot, or having to lock myself in the cabin, lol. Is dress a big deal?? Please be honest, I need to know what the expectations are. Thanks.

[VillaHappy]

I've seen all kinds of things on a cruise ship, and I think you will be OK.

[adamsmom]

Dress is NOT a big deal. Most cruise lines have some guidelines on what is not allowed in the dining rooms for dinner, but they are very flexible. You will see all kinds of people wearing all kinds of different things. My only concern would be that pants and long sleeves, if that's what you're comfortable wearing, will get too hot outside in the sun. Otherwise, wear what you would normally wear. Not a problem. ;)

[Ladypop]

Thank you for replying so quickly. :). I'm not too worried about the heat, and am happy in swim clothes, etc, but my normal dress is probably more "teenage boy" than "mother of teenage boy", and I don't want to cause hassles. A friend gave me a list of what she packed when she went on a cruise, and just reading it was enough to make me want to put on my beanie, and it's 36 degrees in the shade here :p. But if I can get away with my t shirts and baggy yoga pants then I'll be fine.

[BeagleOne]

What cruise line are you on? Most ships have some kind of buffet restaurant that is more casual than the main dining room for dinner, and the dress codes for the MDRs vary from line to line. You might want to post your question directly on the cruise line's forum.

 

You can always bring "dressy t-shirts"...you know, the same basic cut as a regular t-shirt, but with some "bling" on them instead of a logo.

 

I'm not sure exactly what you mean by a "beanie"...I keep picturing one of those little hats with a propeller on top...:)...or one of the caps Australian lifeguards wear...but if you are comfortable with different hats you could always bring a dressier one.

 

I guess I'd say bring some more formal outfits like dresses and then see how each day goes, and decide what to wear (and perhaps where to eat) depending on how you and your sons feel that day.

 

Have fun!

[Ladypop]

 

I'm not sure exactly what you mean by a "beanie"...I keep picturing one of those little hats with a propeller on top...:)...or one of the caps Australian lifeguards wear...

 

 

Lol at the propellor hat, I've always fancied one of those!! A beanie is a woollen hat, like what you would wear in the snow, I guess. For me it's helpful for helping to block sound because it covers my ears and also makes me more comfortable inside, if that makes any sense. I've got a few different ones, some are like a crochet cap so maybe better for on the ship?? We are going on the Sea Princess. I tried ringing their customer service people but the lady I spoke to wasn't very helpful, or maybe she didn't understand what I was talking about.

Wouldn't be the first time, lol.

[CraftyEC]

You can, more or less, wear what you want (as long as it is decent, not too scruffy - so what you describe is fine), at least during the day. The only restrictions, really, are in the evenings in the main dining room, and if it was an evening where you would feel more comfortable in your usual gear than in a 'posh frock' then you can just go to a non-formal venue to eat.

 

And I would disagree about the long sleeves / trousers in the heat, I tend to get a rash (polymorphic light eruption, it is very common) in the sun, so on warm to hot days I wear t-shirt and shorts, but as the temperature winds up I'm back into long sleeves and trousers, and often feel cooler, I think! And given your current heatwave I think you should know by now what makes you comfortable!

 

The most important thing is that you, and your sons, feel comfortable; I know (DD has marked Aspie tendencies and DD, DS and DH all have dyspraxia) that if you don't, the sensory overload becomes more of a problem and it can become a vicious circle. I would think that you are used to being seen as a little 'different' as a family group, and that you have found your own place / comfort zone in big groups, and you will be fine.

[kingoftheicedragons]

I think you'd be okay.

 

Will some people look at you strangely? Maybe, but don't let them spoil your vacation.

 

If you think it might be an issue with the MDR, see if you can speak to the maitr'd on embarkation day and explain the issue to him, that you sometimes wear a hat in the MDR for medical reasons. I don't know if they have to make a policy exception for you in this case (assuming they have a rule about no hats in the MDR), but it would be cold of them not to.

[spookwife]

a few comments:

 

shorts in the main dining room for dinner will not be appropriate for anyone.

 

tank tops on the guys at dinner: don't even think about it in the MDR.

 

on formal nights you *might* be asked to dress more appropriately than cargo pants in the MDR.

 

cover ups are required in any venue other than the pool when in swim suits.

 

don't think of room service as being exiled, think of it as your private refuge to get away form all the stimulation and relax, especially if you have a balcony. nothing more awesome than sipping on a glass at sunset on your balcony....

[Ladypop]

I think as long as I can wear "my" clothes and maybe my hat if needed, I'll be OK. I fully understand and appreciate dress codes and the reasons for them. It's nice to have the opportunity to dress up and feel special, and I would hate to disrupt that for anyone. If we're feeling a little too collectively "special" :eek: for formal dining after a big day, it's good to know we can go a little more low key to another area. I'm thinking I'll pack my hat AND a nice dress. Just in case.:p

[Sauer-kraut]

I think as long as I can wear "my" clothes and maybe my hat if needed, I'll be OK. I fully understand and appreciate dress codes and the reasons for them. It's nice to have the opportunity to dress up and feel special, and I would hate to disrupt that for anyone. If we're feeling a little too collectively "special" :eek: for formal dining after a big day, it's good to know we can go a little more low key to another area. I'm thinking I'll pack my hat AND a nice dress. Just in case.:p

 

With that attitude you'll be fine! Have a wonderful cruise ;)

 

My Granny took me to Fiji on a container ship when I was 13 and I loved it. It was my dream to cross the equator (of course the night we crossed I was in bed). But I liked Fiji and it was a special trip, I hope yours will be just as wonderful!

[NLH Arizona]

I have an idea for formal night for you. If you feel good enough to wear something dressier but still need your beanie, why not purchase a pin before you go (with some bling on it) and put it on one of your crochet beanies. You would probably be the most fashionable lady at the ball!!! Just a thought.

[SMerritt]

I have an idea for formal night for you. If you feel good enough to wear something dressier but still need your beanie, why not purchase a pin before you go (with some bling on it) and put it on one of your crochet beanies. You would probably be the most fashionable lady at the ball!!! Just a thought.

 

DAM! Arizona You are brilliant! I would dine with anyone with a Blingy-Beanie anytime, just too cute.

 

I actually have a floor-length,very basic, dress, cotton/polyester (sort of like a long flowing tank top,t-shirt fabric), that I bought long ago to just casually toss on for comfort. It has no been on every cruise with a scarf, or sparkly something added for evenings - think it was $10.00 at Walmart :p

[Ladypop]

I showed your replies to my mum and she said she'll crochet me a cap and a shawl from some dressy wool, so if we're having a good day, we can try and dress up and I can still cover my head and myself without looking like I'm hiding under a blanket. :D

[Laughing Angel]

Ladypop, that sounds fabulous! I'm sure you'll look terrific.

 

I hope that you and your family will have a lovely time on your cruise.

[Cruisin' Chick]

Don't know which ship you'll be on. If on a Princess ship, many people will eat in the buffet if they don't feel like dressing up or are in a shorts/tee shirt type of mood. Two cruise ago, we actually ate half of our meals (on a two-week cruise) in the Horizon Court (which is what the buffet on most of the Princess ships is called) -- as long as you're not wearing just a bathing suit, you're fine.

 

On our last cruise, I packed a long, gauzy black skirt (the type you don't have to worry about getting wrinkled) and wore that a couple of times in the MDR. I paired it with a shiny red sweater for the Christmas Night dinner, which was formal, and I didn't feel out of place at all. Wore it on a smart casual night with another top. You can always dress up a plain outfit with sparkling jewelry and it'll look fancier.

 

And if you put on a crochet hat that was made with sparkly yarn and put on a pin as suggested above, you might even look more smartly dress than a woman wearing a gaudy gown, IMO. And many women (and men) who have gone through chemo will often wear knit caps if they've lost their hair (and to keep their head warm), so if anyone makes a crack, they are risking looking like a jerk themselves.

 

I did bring yoga pants on my last cruise (we had some expected cool days at the start and end of the cruise) and wore them during days.

[Kim Fontaine]

I am a hat person: I also have to restrict the amount of sun i can be exposed to because of meds: I have found that taking along two-three long scarves that I can fashion in to a hat has been very helpful:

[Lioness71]

Have you considered or tried some sort of head scarf instead of a beanie? It may give you a similar tactile sensation and also could be fashioned in a way that covers your ears when you want it to. Not that there's anything wrong with a beanie, but I imagine it can get tiresome if people are constantly doing double-takes or it makes you self-conscious.

 

Something along these lines if I'm not explaining it well (this website has nothing to do with me, just a result of a quick google search) -

 

http://www.etsy.com/listing/107425488/head-wrap-collection-head-scarf-wide

[maureencruiser]

If you look at some of the picture reviews here, you will see that a lot of passengers dress like teenage boys! There is a cruise fashion/beauty board here if you want to come on over! A lot of talk about formal dresses, but, some good advice about basic stuff as well. Bon Voyage!

[Ladypop]

Lioness71 thanks for the link :). Over the next few months I'm going to do some experimenting and see which things work the best. And I'm going to pack my fave beanie and wear it while I'm walking my laps every morning. Between the hat and the exercise, I should be fit for human interaction by breakfast :p.

[NMLady]

I'm not exactly sure if this is the right place, but here goes. We're cruising for the first time in November this year, to Fiji. Myself, hubby and two sons 13 and 18 . Myself and both sons have Aspergers, so between us we have quite a few sensitivities, some to noise, some to crowds, some to clothes. Most of these we can and do deal with on a daily basis with out anyone around us realising or feeling uncomfortable. My husband, bless his heart, just goes along with our occasional quirks and "aspie-isms" as part of the ride. We love him, he's a keeper :D. My big concern is clothes. I dress like my sons. T shirts and fishermans pants or yoga pants, for the most part. I sometimes wear a beanie even in hot weather, if my sensitivities are getting hard to handle. Something about having my head covered is a big calming down thing for me. Will this be an issue? I can and do wear dresses and formal clothes, and may even do so on the formal night. BUT, if I'm having a bit of an overwhelming day, I'd like to be able to wear my mufti without feeling like the village idiot, or having to lock myself in the cabin, lol. Is dress a big deal?? Please be honest, I need to know what the expectations are. Thanks.

 

No problem. The only time clothing might be an issue is dinner in the dining room. But in that case the buffet is always an option.

 

Even though some people might think a beanie is weird, it would still be appropriate. So do just as you do at home to feel comfortable.

[jocap]

Ladypop- Sea Princess was my first ever cruise, and I loved her! You'll have no problems with wearing your comfortable clothes, and I think the crochetted hat is inspired. :)

We ate in the Horizon buffet on several evenings, and many people were in their everyday clothes- but no-one was really looking at them.

And hat wise- well, there were plenty of folk still wearing their baseball caps around, so why should a beanie be seen as different? Wear it with pride, as my friend did after cancer....it inspired her whole family to come up with decorative things to wear on her head.

Have a wonderful cruise. :cool: