My first cruise - how/where's best to meet people? (confronting social anxiety)

[lopakarob]

Thank you to the original poster for asking the questions. This was perfect timing for me, as I have been trying to decide if I wanted to cruise solo for the first time next month. After reading all the great responses, I've chosen to step out of my comfort zone and book the cruise.

[thescot123]

Thank you to the original poster for asking the questions. This was perfect timing for me, as I have been trying to decide if I wanted to cruise solo for the first time next month. After reading all the great responses, I've chosen to step out of my comfort zone and book the cruise.

 

Good on you in considering to cruise solo. You are going to have fun and wonder why you didn't do solo cruising earlier.

 

Have fun.

 

 

Sent using the Cruise Critic forums app

[columbofan]

What clothes should I bring?

 

I am in the process of packing, and have packed t-shirts, polo shirts, casual shirts, turtlenecks, chino trousers, jeans, leather jackets, and a suit for formal nights, plus trainers and smart black shoes.

 

I did some reading and it seems everyone suggests layers, fleece, and a raincoat, something I don't have and am not going to spend any more money on clothes for a one week trip. Hopefully the clothes I have packed will be good enough? It shouldn't be cold at this time of year, surely.

 

 

 

I also want to bring some tablets with me - some paracetamol and some calmers (for relaxing and easing my anxiety), both bought over the counter with the receipt packed in too, unprescribed. The latter is a blister pack of 84 of which I don't want to tamper in the case they raise suspicions, hopefully this is ok?

[Lois R]

I am in a similar position and have almost made my mind up. A couple of questions if I may? Will post on another topic if this is not the correct place as not posted here before...

 

Looking at going with Celebrity next year in Europe.

 

1) Apart from the odd "formal" evening where us men need to wear a dark shirt, what is the dress code at other meal times? i.e. is a smart pair of jeans OK as do not want to have to bring too many formal clothes with me, or can you get by wearing shorts even?

 

2) Read about these "roll calls", but not really sure how they work to be honest.

 

3) As a nervous lone traveler, I am wondering if I would be best to go on the excursions organised by the Ship? Not sure I fancy walking/traveling around a city that I will have limited knowledge of.

 

Any general help in a first time cruiser would be greatly appreciated.

 

Thank you.

 

Hi, I sail Celebrity all the time:).....just returned home on Sunday

from another cruise with them.:D (I always sail solo).

Dress code...I will give you what I know since I have been sailing

with them for 10 years in a row.

 

Formal night would be a suit......all other nights are called "Smart

Casual".....you are allowed to wear jeans on those evenings. (no holes

in them). As for shorts? They ask for no shorts in the evenings in the

maing dining room but people do what they want and sometimes they

are asked to go change and sometimes not. I never wear shorts to

dinner.

Roll calls?....it is a forum on here where you can meet other people

going on the same cruise as you:D...I have friends I met years ago

through the roll call and we sailed together and are now friends for

life.:)

Depending on the cruise? You can also share in excursions and meet

folks for activities (If you want). If you prefer doing tours through the

ship, do that too. I have done both.

 

Hope this helps a bit:)

[scottishlochs]

Hi. I'm sure you will have a wonderful holiday. I've cruised solo numerous times and I love it. I've never felt judged or that people feel I'm odd. Some may say 'aren't you brave! ' but they mean it in a kind way.

 

Dining: I always choose set dining at a large table, late sitting and have met some lovely people. As a previous post said, just because people are in couples or with friends doesn't mean they don't want to talk and share experiences.

 

Excursions: I split my time and do half ship's excursions and half 'doing my own thing'. Have a look at the posts on Cruise Critic about the various ports and have a plan of action before you o.

 

Solo events: most ships have a solos' coffee morning or something similar. Go along with no expectations and you may be surprised. Many people will be just as nervous as you.

 

One more point, I've done about eight cruises, alone, but I don't think of myself as a single cruiser. I don't like to pigeonhole myself and I don't feel I have to explain myself. I'm just a single woman who loves travelling and cruising.

 

Go and enjoy the experience. I'm sure you'll have a wonderful time. From Ann

[bottomfeeder]

What clothes should I bring?

 

I am in the process of packing, and have packed t-shirts, polo shirts, casual shirts, turtlenecks, chino trousers, jeans, leather jackets, and a suit for formal nights, plus trainers and smart black shoes.

 

I did some reading and it seems everyone suggests layers, fleece, and a raincoat, something I don't have and am not going to spend any more money on clothes for a one week trip. Hopefully the clothes I have packed will be good enough? It shouldn't be cold at this time of year, surely.

 

 

 

I also want to bring some tablets with me - some paracetamol and some calmers (for relaxing and easing my anxiety), both bought over the counter with the receipt packed in too, unprescribed. The latter is a blister pack of 84 of which I don't want to tamper in the case they raise suspicions, hopefully this is ok?

 

I can't imagine you would have any trouble with non-prescription tablets of any sort, although I suppose it is possible from airline/airport security if the items happen to be something that is not sold non-prescription in the country where you are traveling. When I was in London this spring I bought some non-prescription ibuprofen with codeine tablets, and was a little concerned about flying to the US with them since they are not sold non-prescription in the US...I put them in my checked luggage and had no problems at all. In the worst possible case they might confiscate them, but if you say you didn't realize they were not allowed I cannot imagine you'd have any trouble.

 

Not anything to be worried about! :)

[kek123]

My Carnival cruise was absolutely nothing like that. When I met people, they treated me as an equal and barely even mentioned the fact that I was cruising solo. What did they do on your Princess cruise that constituted horrible treatment? Was it anything like my experience?

 

On my solo Princess cruise the dining room and piano bar was the worst. The first night I shared a table with three couples traveling together, when they realized I was alone they called the Maitre 'D over pointed at me and loudly stated "we are not comfortable with that at the table!" The Maitre 'D who was a royal jack--- the whole trip just shrugged his shoulders and said "I have to seat it somewhere". Some of the same in the dirty looks and "just one, Why?" comments similar to what you experienced. One man even said to me when I was sitting at the bar in the piano bar "you have been sitting there a long time, can't you move so I can sit?". I could go on and on, it was an awful trip all around.

[Darcy15]

My Carnival cruise was absolutely nothing like that. When I met people, they treated me as an equal and barely even mentioned the fact that I was cruising solo. What did they do on your Princess cruise that constituted horrible treatment? Was it anything like my experience?

 

On my solo Princess cruise the dining room and piano bar was the worst. The first night I shared a table with three couples traveling together, when they realized I was alone they called the Maitre 'D over pointed at me and loudly stated "we are not comfortable with that at the table!" The Maitre 'D who was a royal jack--- the whole trip just shrugged his shoulders and said "I have to seat it somewhere". Some of the same in the dirty looks and "just one, Why?" comments similar to what you experienced. One man even said to me when I was sitting at the bar in the piano bar "you have been sitting there a long time, can't you move so I can sit?". I could go on and on, it was an awful trip all around.

 

You were referred to as 'it' by a member of staff? Did you make an official complaint? - because I most certainly would have done!!

 

I travel solo exclusively - by choice - and have never had any problems. I have taken several Princess cruises and have always been very well looked after.

[kek123]

On my solo Princess cruise the dining room and piano bar was the worst. The first night I shared a table with three couples traveling together, when they realized I was alone they called the Maitre 'D over pointed at me and loudly stated "we are not comfortable with that at the table!" The Maitre 'D who was a royal jack--- the whole trip just shrugged his shoulders and said "I have to seat it somewhere". Some of the same in the dirty looks and "just one, Why?" comments similar to what you experienced. One man even said to me when I was sitting at the bar in the piano bar "you have been sitting there a long time, can't you move so I can sit?". I could go on and on, it was an awful trip all around.

 

You were referred to as 'it' by a member of staff? Did you make an official complaint? - because I most certainly would have done!!

 

I travel solo exclusively - by choice - and have never had any problems. I have taken several Princess cruises and have always been very well looked after.

 

I did complain to management about the inappropriate commentary and overall shoddy treatment both on the ship and afterward to their corporate office. Both on and off the ship they couldn't have cared less. Suffice to say I will never sail with Princess again!

[Cruzin-K]

 

 

On my first solo cruise I met 3 very nice young men who asked "Honey, are you all by yourself?" When I answered yes, one of them said "Well, you're not any more." We had a blast -- went horseback riding on Barbados, rode scooters around St. Lucia -- and they called me every morning to tell me when they were going to breakfast. It was probably one of the best cruises I have ever been on. It certainly cured my fear of cruising alone.

 

 

That would actually ADD to problems with cruising alone, for me. I don't want to be called Honey by total strangers, and I'm not the type to want to join in on activities with people I just met either, especially men. It's different if they're people from the roll call with whom I've been chatting for months, but not random strangers latching on to me on the ship. I guess I'm a bit too cautious and concerned about my safety, and after being nice and friendly to an older man on one of my early cruises, and he turned out to be a major creep (no, I will not elaborate on here), I just try to keep to myself on the cruise, except for some meal times and shore excursions.

[calliopecruiser]

That would actually ADD to problems with cruising alone, for me. I don't want to be called Honey by total strangers, and I'm not the type to want to join in on activities with people I just met either, especially men.

 

I agree (well, not about the Honey, part), though my reason isn't about safety.......I want to spend time with people I like, not just people who are available or who decide they want to "rescue" me. I wouldn't mind an invitation to join people for a meal, but the presumption that I would want to spend a lot of time with them is premature. I may have dinner or a drink with them and then decide I don't like them all that much, or they don't like to do what I like, or something else.

[JustCruiseMe]

Go and have a good time. And like many of the previous posters said don't count out talking to the couples. We are a couple who will invite anyone who is alone to join us but they have to, with a smile or a look in the eye, let us know they acknowledge us, if not we think they want to be alone, which is fine too.

 

If someone asks you why you are cruising alone I'd tell them "because I enjoy my own company as much as anyone else's" I guess else's isn't a word..sorry.

[Cruzin-K]

I agree (well, not about the Honey, part), though my reason isn't about safety.......I want to spend time with people I like, not just people who are available or who decide they want to "rescue" me. I wouldn't mind an invitation to join people for a meal, but the presumption that I would want to spend a lot of time with them is premature. I may have dinner or a drink with them and then decide I don't like them all that much, or they don't like to do what I like, or something else.

 

Exactly! ;) I don't need rescuing.

[eigig]

Have no idea about the OTC meds but a few ideas about your cruise.

 

Everyone who travels solo is unique. I am married but got used to travelling solo for business and found I really like it. My husband has MS and cannot tolerate long travel but encouraged me to keep on travelling.

 

I have been on several land based vacations solo and found them to be really fun. I joined tours most days and had lovely quiet dinners in the evening solo or sometimes curious and delightful couples would ask me to join them for an after dinner drink. Everyone wants to know why you are travelling solo!! I found that a great many people confess that they have a secret wish to travel solo but have not been brave enough to do so.

 

This past July I went on my first solo cruise and was a little nervous cause I know what you mean about it being a "couples-thing" . Actually, I had the best time! The wait staff were so friendly and I met a few nice people on excursions etc. and always felt welcome.

My advice is to bring a crutch like a cell phone or kindle so you can get absorbed in something if you are sitting alone. Act friendly and expect that people will just naturally be curious (jealous??) that you are cruising alone and want to find out how you did it or they are admiring your bravery that they wish they had (in fact, more than a few people have mentioned this to me).

 

go and enjoy and come back and tell us all about it.

wishing you the best success!

[CelticDuck]

I'll be doing that solo thing this Fall (Grandeur of the Seas, Nov. 26). My cruise experiences were always with my ex-wife. If I let it, the anxiety will eat me alive so I'm trying to figure out how best to handle that.

 

The roll call seems quiet. Would anyone know if RCI hosts any form of solo get-together early in the cruise? I don't need or want constant company, but I'm hoping to meet some folks and force myself out of an all too tiny comfort zone.

[sea4steve]

I believe your cruise is in progress as I write this reply. I hope all is going well. I can relate to your concerns. I'm a single father and I was planning to take a cruise with my 16 year old daughter but it turned out she was unable to go. I've always been a very shy person but the thought of going on a cruise was so exciting that I decided (with a true measure of trepidation) that I would go by myself. I'm booked on the May 24Th, 2014 cruise on the NCL Getaway. I'm in a studio cabin.

 

I'm way out of my element here as I've never done anything like this before and I share your same concerns. This is also my first cruise. I'm also nervous about spending a lot of time alone. I'm also afraid of trying to join in on an activity and being made to feel like a "fifth wheel".

 

But in the few short days that I've been a member of Cruise Critic, I've discovered the vast majority of cruisers are really nice people. I'm completely new to cruising. It's really reassuring to think that I stand a good chance of meeting people like this on my first cruise.

 

And I must admit I found your bravery to get out there and try something new to be a bit inspiring. I figure... Hey, if this guy can do it then I can do it too.

 

So let us know how things went. I hope you had fun. And the next time you find yourself in a social situation (especially with the ladies) and you're starting to feel anxious just be yourself and remember, try not to frown. You have no idea who's about to fall in love with your smile. Good luck.

[thescot123]

I believe your cruise is in progress as I write this reply. I hope all is going well. I can relate to your concerns. I'm a single father and I was planning to take a cruise with my 16 year old daughter but it turned out she was unable to go. I've always been a very shy person but the thought of going on a cruise was so exciting that I decided (with a true measure of trepidation) that I would go by myself. I'm booked on the May 24Th, 2014 cruise on the NCL Getaway. I'm in a studio cabin.

 

I'm way out of my element here as I've never done anything like this before and I share your same concerns. This is also my first cruise. I'm also nervous about spending a lot of time alone. I'm also afraid of trying to join in on an activity and being made to feel like a "fifth wheel".

 

But in the few short days that I've been a member of Cruise Critic, I've discovered the vast majority of cruisers are really nice people. I'm completely new to cruising. It's really reassuring to think that I stand a good chance of meeting people like this on my first cruise.

 

And I must admit I found your bravery to get out there and try something new to be a bit inspiring. I figure... Hey, if this guy can do it then I can do it too.

 

So let us know how things went. I hope you had fun. And the next time you find yourself in a social situation (especially with the ladies) and you're starting to feel anxious just be yourself and remember, try not to frown. You have no idea who's about to fall in love with your smile. Good luck.

 

Like you, I am also shy in certain situations. Having cruised solo multiple times before, I find that I soon get over the cruise jitters. You have booked a studio cabin which will means that you have private lounge to share with other people in these type of cabins. This will be a great place to meet other people. Being solo, gives a lot of freedom to do what you want to do. I usually go to the meet and greets and I find people to share excursions with. One thing that I do on NCL is to engage with the crew and find out more about them like about where they are from. NCL has one of the best crew in the industry and who work very hard.

 

You are going to have fun. Would like to go no the Getaway but Miami is a long drive from Alabama and I don't like flying anymore.

 

Have fun.

[DebBrown]

I am sailing solo to Europe next week. Not by choice but I have too much invested in the trip to NOT go. That said, I do have excursions planned with the same group of people at each port. We met on our roll call last year. I have pre-paid for transportation from the airport to my hotel and from the ship back to the airport. Other than that, I plan to enjoy myself and make the most of it. I truly don't care what anyone else thinks. When they pay my fare, they can ask all the questions they want. Until then, it's no-one else's business that I am traveling solo. If they insist on asking, I will tell them "because I can."

[majeslsa]

I have read most of the posts. This will be my 6th cruise, but my first solo. I am used to traveling solo for work and have a choice if I want to be alone or join a group. On my past cruises, it was easy to meet others on my own and ended up having a blast with my new friends both with and without my husband.

 

When traveling solo - a few things to keep in mind....

1) you need to make an effort to introduce yourself to others. you just can't sit back alone and expect people to approach you. be an extrovert if you want to meet others

2) find opportunities that encourage interaction with others - dont necessarily just sit in the library.

3) definitely join ship roll call. you will meet a lot of people if you then join the meet and greet.

4) If someone isn't interested in talking with you, don't give up. Most ships have another 2399+ people on it - you'll find someone to speak with.

 

Have fun!

[JakTar]

Hello,

 

You have absolutely nothing to worry about.

Opt for assigned dining in the main dining room and you'll be seated with fellow solos. Note: 'solos', not 'singles' - all single travellers are solos but not all solos are singles.

Also, join in the on-board activities, especially dancing. You're hopeless at dancing? Two left feet? Tone deaf? Excellent. So are lots of passengers at the dance classes - they haven't a clue and they want to learn. It's an excellent ice-breaker.

Below are links to three cruise diaries I posted after travelling solo. They're rather long but you mind find bits of them give some insight into how much fun it is:

http://boards.cruisecritic.com/showthread.php?t=1858505

http://cruiseforums.cruisecritic.com/showthread.php?t=1770405

http://cruiseforums.cruisecritic.com/showthread.php?t=1584868

 

Regards

Jak