Maitre'd tipping etiquette

[starryuk]

Hello all,

 

I know the whole business of tipping incenses people, so apologies for even mentioning the word, but we are worried.

 

Having booked a last minute 7 day cruise on Ventura, we have no allocated dining, but my friend needs to eat at around 8pm due to medication.

 

It has been recommended on the forum to go immediately to the maitre'd if you are not happy with your dining arrangements. So my question is, if we are put on first sitting, would handing him/her a discreet tip be acceptable/insulting or make no difference at all to getting us moved. (I saw my dad doing it, but that was in the 'old days'.)

 

All advice gratefully received!

[daiB]

Hello all,

 

 

 

I know the whole business of tipping incenses people, so apologies for even mentioning the word, but we are worried.

 

 

 

Having booked a last minute 7 day cruise on Ventura, we have no allocated dining, but my friend needs to eat at around 8pm due to medication.

 

 

 

It has been recommended on the forum to go immediately to the maitre'd if you are not happy with your dining arrangements. So my question is, if we are put on first sitting, would handing him/her a discreet tip be acceptable/insulting or make no difference at all to getting us moved. (I saw my dad doing it, but that was in the 'old days'.)

 

 

 

All advice gratefully received!

 

 

I would suspect that you will not get first sitting as it tends to be favourite. My best guess would be second sitting that's 8.30. Flexible sitting also tends to be popular.

 

 

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[soobs]

when we were on Ventura in December 2 of the restaurants were on freedom dining so if dining is the same I would say there is more chance of you being given freedom rather than first or second sitting

[Will&Hel]

I don't think tipping will work but a call to customer service regarding medical situation would have a better chance

 

 

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[starryuk]

I would suspect that you will not get first sitting as it tends to be favourite. My best guess would be second sitting that's 8.30. Flexible sitting also tends to be popular.

 

Ah. Ok then, it seems I am worrying unnecessarily. 2nd sitting or freedom would be fine.

 

Thank you everyone for your help.

 

I actually rang P and O to ask about this a few days ago. The response in quite a helpful manner was that we could always eat in the buffet.:eek::eek: I couldn't quite believe what I was hearing...and it was not that I was being aggressive or rude!

[majortom10]

I would suspect that you will not get first sitting as it tends to be favourite. My best guess would be second sitting that's 8.30. Flexible sitting also tends to be popular.

 

Ah. Ok then, it seems I am worrying unnecessarily. 2nd sitting or freedom would be fine.

 

Thank you everyone for your help.

 

I actually rang P and O to ask about this a few days ago. The response in quite a helpful manner was that we could always eat in the buffet.:eek::eek: I couldn't quite believe what I was hearing...and it was not that I was being aggressive or rude!

 

The reason why they said that is because you have booked a late deal at a greatly reduced price and their T&Cs of late Saver deals is that dinner sitting is at their discretion. There will be a lot on the cruise who will have paid a lot more so that they could choose their dinner sitting and rightly so they will aggrieved if you book a Saver deal pay a lot less and expect to choose dinner to your suiting and if it was that important you should have booked earlier and pay the dearer Select price to get dinner sitting of your choice.

[lake5298]

.....would handing him/her a discreet tip be acceptable/insulting or make no difference at all.....

 

While there is no guarantee that a tip will make any difference, I would be greatly surprised if offering a tip would be insulting.

 

Any Maitre d' who is so easily insulted would not last long on a typical cruise ship.....

[the english lady]

The reason why they said that is because you have booked a late deal at a greatly reduced price and their T&Cs of late Saver deals is that dinner sitting is at their discretion. There will be a lot on the cruise who will have paid a lot more so that they could choose their dinner sitting and rightly so they will aggrieved if you book a Saver deal pay a lot less and expect to choose dinner to your suiting and if it was that important you should have booked earlier and pay the dearer Select price to get dinner sitting of your choice.

 

Totally agree with your comments.

[molecrochip]

On embarkation day there is an opportunity to speak with the Maitre'd and request a change to your dining arrangements if they do not suit. They collect all the requests and satisfy as many as possible later that day. There are no guarantees and there is no need to tip specifically for this purpose but I would mention the medical reason.

 

Anyone from the whole ship can request a change at the same time therefore queues can be long and arriving early is never a bad bet.

 

Enjoy your cruise.

 

 

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[starryuk]

Hi MajorTom,

 

The reason why they said that is because you have booked a late deal at a greatly reduced price and their T&Cs of late Saver deals is that dinner sitting is at their discretion. There will be a lot on the cruise who will have paid a lot more so that they could choose their dinner sitting and rightly so they will aggrieved if you book a Saver deal pay a lot less and expect to choose dinner to your suiting and if it was that important you should have booked earlier and pay the dearer Select price to get dinner sitting of your choice.

I am sorry you feel that way. Unfortunately my friend cares for her elderly dad, my mum has just died and we needed to get away after a horrendous time for both of us. We didn't have the luxury of being able to book anything earlier.

 

Thank you to everyone who helped with my question without making unfair assumptions.

Edited June 19, 2014 by starryuk

[molecrochip]

It's worth noting that by the time a saver price is announced, even the select fare may be showing wait list on all bar one dining option. Indeed when we looked, the only inside cabin available on a select fare was a guarantee cabin.

 

Now when this is the situation, you are paying hundreds more and the only difference is you don't gave to pay shuttle fees. I spoke to P&O and they told me not to book a select fare for this reason. I was advised that they had yet to get around it removing the select fare from the booking system.

 

It's not always as black and white as it seems.

 

 

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[the english lady]

Sympathy for you after a horrible time. You asked a question. It was replied to.

The only answer P and O could give was eat in the buffet, as anything else could not be guaranteed.

As has already been mentioned usually 1st sitting is the most popular . So probably when you get onboard your card will say 2nd sitting-or more probably freedom. (I think saver fares may be allocated freedom dining). If you wanted a table for 2 in freedom you would probably have to wait-if you sat on a large table , easier for them to accommodate

I think offering to give the MD money to accommodate your wishes annoyed some people. With no background to go on how could anything else be said.

[P&O SUE]

Hi MajorTom,

 

 

I am sorry you feel that way. Unfortunately my friend cares for her elderly dad, my mum has just died and we needed to get away after a horrendous time for both of us. We didn't have the luxury of being able to book anything earlier.

 

Thank you to everyone who helped with my question without making unfair assumptions.

 

I am sorry for your bad times recently and hope you enjoy the cruise.

I'm sure mentioning the medical condition they will do the best they can to accommodate you.

 

Please come back and let us know what happened :)

[Charleyben]

Setting aside your personal circumstances for which you have my sympathies, the crux of this thread revolves around making a payment to the maître d in order that he would provide a service that he would not necessarily carry out.

 

If the maître d, having listened to your personal circumstances, carried out what you requested and you subsequently gave him something as a thank you, this is a tip.

 

If you offer him money in advance in the hope that he will accept it and give you what you are asking, is a bribe, not a tip.

 

I'm not passing judgement here but if it looks like a duck and walks like a duck.........

 

Ps Our American cousins wouldn't think twice about it and I would agree with the comment already expressed, it takes a lot more than this to offend a maître d.

[Big Foot]

Hello all,

 

I know the whole business of tipping incenses people, so apologies for even mentioning the word, but we are worried.

 

Having booked a last minute 7 day cruise on Ventura, we have no allocated dining, but my friend needs to eat at around 8pm due to medication.

 

It has been recommended on the forum to go immediately to the maitre'd if you are not happy with your dining arrangements. So my question is, if we are put on first sitting, would handing him/her a discreet tip be acceptable/insulting or make no difference at all to getting us moved. (I saw my dad doing it, but that was in the 'old days'.)

 

All advice gratefully received!

 

Hi StarryUK,

 

I had a similar 'concern' with regards to booking my Parents on a late saver cruise in May on Azura.

 

Hubby & I had booked on opening day & paid the select fare price & therefore knew we would be granted our 1st choice of dining @ 6.30pm.

 

Like you due to personal family reasons we wanted to take them on holiday but couldn't afford the cost of the increased select fare.

 

I fully understood & accepted the T&C's re the saver fare bookings & knew the chance I was taking.

 

However, I also knew that if Mum & Dad couldn't eat with us their enjoyment of the cruise would be somewhat curtailed. Dad too has to take various mediation & for that reason cannot eat too late. If they got allocated 2nd sitting then we would have worked around it by using the buffet / Glass House etc, but it wasn't what we really wanted to do.

 

Our TA 'linked' our bookings & asked for a table for 4 for us on 1st sitting although stated this could not be guaranteed, but they did say that the staff on board would do all they could to ensure that their guests had a wonderful time.

 

Someone very kindly suggested that I send an email to the ship for the attention of the Matire D outlining the situation & whilst I did not get a reply when we checked our dining allocation we had been granted the same sitting & a table for 4.

 

I have no idea if it was our TA linking our bookings or my email but something worked & for that I am eternally grateful.:)

 

I understand the email address for Ventura is

 

vepsm@pocruises.com

 

I hope this helps & wish you all the best in securing what you require & more importantly a wonderful cruise.

 

Joan

[starryuk]

If you offer him money in advance in the hope that he will accept it and give you what you are asking, is a bribe, not a tip.

 

I do agree with this actually:), which is why I referred to 'etiquette'. I was not sure if it was the done thing or not.

 

Anyway, the advice is all gratefully received. We are quite happy to have 2nd sitting or freedom and don't mind at all about the size of table. I do understand that since we have booked last minute we should not have as much choice...it is only the medical situation...

 

So if necessary we will simply ask the maitre'd without further inducement!

 

Right. That's sorted. Now back to the packing and planning:D:D

[starryuk]

Thank you Bigfoot,

 

That is very helpful. Better than waiting until we board the ship. I shall definitely email the maitre'd.

 

I hope you and your parents enjoyed your Azura cruise.

[Big Foot]

Thank you Bigfoot,

 

That is very helpful. Better than waiting until we board the ship. I shall definitely email the maitre'd.

 

I hope you and your parents enjoyed your Azura cruise.

 

Hello,

 

Yes we had a wonderful time & I forgot to add that when we popped down to the restaurant to have a look at our table it was shut & there was a notice outside saying that they wouldn't be taking any requests for table changes!

 

I'd definitely email them; you can only but try.

 

Joan

[majortom10]

Hi MajorTom,

 

 

I am sorry you feel that way. Unfortunately my friend cares for her elderly dad, my mum has just died and we needed to get away after a horrendous time for both of us. We didn't have the luxury of being able to book anything earlier.

 

Thank you to everyone who helped with my question without making unfair assumptions.

 

I am truly sorry for your recent loss having recently lost my father I know how it feels. I wasnt trying to upset you but just stating facts and the problems P&O have had for the last 3-4 yrs where late bookers seem to get better deals at a lower price than those that are loyal to P&O book early and pay a lot more to get their choice of cabin and dining sitting. Call me cynical but having done a lot of cruises with P&O and know what lengths some people will go to I am sure there there are people out there who book late deals and then falsely say I need a cabin near a lift and a certain dinner sitting for medical reasons when this is not true just an excuse to get their own way.

 

I certainly am not saying you are doing this but trying to put the side of those that have booked a Select fare and perhaps paid double sometimes treble of Saver fares to get their cabin and dining guaranteed.

 

Once again I am truly sorry for your loss and hope whatever the outcome you go on to have a very enjoyable cruise.

[daiB]

Thank you Bigfoot,

 

 

 

That is very helpful. Better than waiting until we board the ship. I shall definitely email the maitre'd.

 

 

 

I hope you and your parents enjoyed your Azura cruise.

 

 

As you can cope with freedom or second sitting I would not worry at all as first sitting has been the most popular now for the past 5/6 years.

 

When we started cruising it was always second sitting which everyone wanted.

 

Have a great cruise.

 

 

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[starryuk]

I am truly sorry for your recent loss having recently lost my father I know how it feels. I wasnt trying to upset you but just stating facts and the problems P&O have had for the last 3-4 yrs where late bookers seem to get better deals at a lower price than those that are loyal to P&O book early and pay a lot more to get their choice of cabin and dining sitting.

 

No worries Majortom.:) Perhaps I was being a bit touchy.

 

I am sorry about your father's death. A difficult time.

 

Best wishes

 

Starry

[soobs]

Is Ventura still operating 2 restaurants on freedom dining like when we were in the Caribbean in December? If so problem almost resolved because that is where most of the dining seats will be available

[Sealoveragain]

Totally agree with your comments.

 

Me too.

[emsnan]

We've been on 4 late fare cruises, on 3 we've had 1st sitting, on the 4th we were allocated 2nd, but the restaurant manager tracked us down (literally, he must have looked us up and found my partner in with the smokers, we don't use the MDR at all, so when he'd phoned to ask when we hadn't come to dinner I told him it was too late for us, as on a previous cruise we'd told them we weren't coming at all and the manager looked at us as if we had 2 heads) to offer us a place on 1st! So, my point is that despite P & O saying you can't change, it is possible.