Westerdam From a Wide-Eyed First Timer

[Shellback801]

Presented with apologies for length.

 

Background

 

I had been lobbying Pam since last winter to go on our first cruise. She had been reluctant, fearing seasickness. One evening, earlier this summer, she was watching Master Chef and saw the promotion for this particular itinerary. It was her suggestion that we book it. I happily paid the premium and had it booked before the show was over.

 

Not knowing the first thing about cruising, it was not until after I booked this cruise that I joined CC and began researching in earnest.

 

 

Demographics

 

Married, retired, mid 50s, kids booted, two grandchildren. Pam is from northern California and I am from south Texas. We live at 5100’ on the western slope of the Wasatch Mountains in northern Utah.

 

Our preferred vacation destination is anywhere with a tropical beach setting.

 

 

Saturday - Embarkation/Sailaway/The Venerable Weng Weng

 

We flew in the night before, staying at the Sheraton on the beach. Being rather excited to get underway we arrived at the terminal at 09:30 the following morning. (new cruisers, right?). We were aboard by 12:15 and I had a weng weng* in my hand by 12:25. Our cabin was ready when we boarded and the last of the luggage was delivered around 15:30.

 

Our cabin, officially entitled “Deluxe Verandah Balcony Stateroom (VA),” was on the 5th deck admidships, port side, directly above a lifeboat. The bed and linen were very comfortable and we found the room size to be adequate for our needs. The view from the verandah was wonderful. I think we ended up having breakfast there three times on this cruise.

 

The sailaway took place around 17:20 due to ship traffic but there was still plenty of light to see those condos that I would dearly love to call home. Captain Van Eerten did not disappoint us, leaning on the ship’s horn like a New York cabbie. This, combined with the cheers from the condos, truly made it a memorable experience. Pam and I were enjoying a glass of bubbly as we sailed by and I recall us looking at each other in disbelief, as if “Wow, this is really happening!”

 

We hit the gulfstream shortly after having dinner on the Lido. The ship took a few 2° or 3° rolls, just enough to make me stupid with nostalgia over my Navy days. It was an entirely different matter for Pam who, despite wearing a prescription patch from her doctor for the last three days, took to bed seasick.

 

*I queried five different bartenders in three venues during this cruise as to the fate of the weng weng. Three of them offered to make it and two of them declined, citing ship’s policy and the fact that there were a couple of incidents aboard the Westerdam that led to this change. One bartender told me, “I can make you a weng weng, a wing wing, a wong wong, whatever you want,” which made me wonder if there is a slightly modified recipe that is a workaround to the new policy. All I really know is that the drink I was served had a lot of alcohol – I watched her make it – and that it took me an hour to finish. Aside from trying the “Drink of the Day,” every day, I mostly stayed true to my warm weather friend, the incomparable G&T.

 

 

Sunday – At Sea/Formal Night/Mayhem on the Mess Decks

 

Poor Pam. In an effort to attend the various Master Chef functions, she had to strategically employ her natural defense against motion sickness – sleep – by timing it between dining and venues. It seemed that after a nap she would have about a two-hour window where she could function with only minor nausea.

 

We had breakfast in the MDR. It was my plan all along to try all of the themed breakfasts HAL offers, but on this cruise I only made it as far as the Full English, Scandinavian, and Dutch. Of those, I enjoyed the English and Scandinavian (who doesn’t like pickled herring in the morning?) the most.

 

At 10:00 we attended our first ever CC M&G in the Crow’s Nest. It was very nice to finally meet you guys after three months of reading the HAL threads. I think Pam lasted about ten minutes – ship’s movement was a little more noticeable up there – before she excused herself.

 

Around 12:30 we ate lunch on the Lido. I’ll say this about Lido dining: The food was merely okay, but it was consistently and reliably okay throughout the cruise, and that was okay by me.

 

Sometime during the afternoon I visited the front desk to get some Marezine in the hope that the combination of the two meds would ease Pam’s suffering.

 

Our dinner reservations were for 20:00 with, I assume, the rest of the 500-600 Master Chef Cruisers. We were seated five minutes early and the rest of the table of eight arrived over the next ten minutes.

 

To say that the dining room was chaotic might be understating things a bit. Our table didn’t see a server until 20:35 when Pam was perilously close to the end of her two-hour window. Some of our tablemates had worked themselves in to a lather by this time, and when the poor server tried to take food orders he was greeted with various renditions of the following:

 

“We’ve been sitting here for over thirty minutes and you haven’t even taken our drink orders yet. Why don’t you take our drink order, bring me the drink, let me have some of the drink, and THEN I’ll think about ordering food.”

 

Pam turned a curious shade of green.

 

I asked the table if they would mind if Pam and I ordered dinner as she wasn’t feeling well. Thankfully, they agreed and drink and food orders were taken all around.

 

“I want my drink brought to me first, though.”

 

As the evening wore on it became obvious that Pam wasn’t going to make it through dinner. The appetizers had yet to arrive so we apologized and excused ourselves. I informed the table that I would be returning to dine with them.

 

When I returned the appetizers were on the table with the rest of the meal following in short order. I don’t know how to put this delicately, so I’m just going to say it:

 

That was the worst meal I have had in recent memory.

 

The escargot appetizer was okay, but the shrimp cocktail consisted of four anemic shrimp and a ramekin of slightly elevated ketchup. The Caesar salad was demi-sized with a thin, watery dressing, and little, if any, Parmesan. It was presented with a lonely anchovy fillet draped across the top. The rack of lamb was savagely overcooked and under seasoned. They didn’t even bother to arrange the food on the plate – it was almost as if they knew it would be a futile gesture. I was floored.

 

At one point the dining room manager (or whatever HAL calls them) stopped by to ask us about our dining experience. In the cacophony of complaints that followed, I was somehow able to convey my desire to have Pam’s dinner delivered to the cabin.

 

In defense of HAL, I am now of the opinion that this was an aberration. Although we only ate dinner in the MDR one other time during the cruise, it was with different company and our dishes were much better. I cannot help but wonder if our table had something to do with it. There were certainly toxic individuals in this group, and I witnessed animosity between a several of them, obviously carried over from the previous evening.

 

Yet it was the servers who bore the brunt of their frustrations. I have to hand it to the dining room staff, though. They kept their composure and professional demeanor throughout the ordeal.

 

Today I still find myself smiling at the notion that the slow service and poorly prepared food might have been the result of sabotage. Would that it were true, even though I was collateral damage.

 

Back at the cabin, Pam had been nibbling on her peppercorn steak.

 

“How’s your steak?” I asked.

 

“Good,” she croaked, before rolling over and falling asleep.

 

 

Monday – Grand Turk/They See Me Rollin’…/Pinnacle Dining in a Bathrobe

 

We had a quick breakfast on the Lido as the ship was inching toward the pier in Grand Turk. Pam was feeling chipper and we were both excited to go ashore and get on with our Segway excursion.

 

The guides were friendly, funny, and informative. After some instruction and a “driving test” that included taking those oversized, knobby tires down to the beach, we began our tour of Cockburn Town.

 

It did not take long to get comfortable on those things. I think we were on James Street, zipping along at a pretty good clip, when I began to slowly catch up to Pam. She was so focused on the road ahead that she had no idea I was there. I edged closer. Then even closer. I got within striking distance and gave her a little tire rub, NASCAR style, earning swift admonition from our vigilant guides and stinkeye from Pam.

 

“Tires, mon! You have to watch de tires!” yelled the voice in our headsets.

 

We continued without incident, stopping occasionally for a photo op. It was a thoroughly enjoyable tour. I not only recommend this excursion, I would do it again.

 

I have since abandoned my tire-rubbing ways.

 

The bus dropped us off at Jack’s Shack where we found ourselves sitting next to some of the band members from the BB King Blues Experience. The bass player told us that they were going to be aboard the Westerdam until March – great news to those of you fortunate enough to sail her this winter. They were terrific.

 

We stayed at Jack’s for an hour or so, enjoying a nice lunch of fried conch, jerk chicken, and fries washed down with Caribbean beer. Pam played with Topher, the island’s most photographed dog.

 

We returned to the ship around 13:30 and headed to the cabin for a nap. When I awoke we were underway so I went to the veranda to watch the ocean go by and wait for Pam. We had a pretty stout headwind sailing toward San Juan, just enough to lift a little of the ocean spray up to the fifth deck. I sat out there grinning like an idiot.

 

Pam, as it turned out, would not leave the cabin for the next 18 hours, the bulk of which was spent in bed such was the extent of her seasickness. During one of her brief waking moments we discussed flying home from San Juan.

 

We had a Pinnacle Grill reservation at 19:30. At 18:30 I changed clothes and went down there to try and cancel where, I was informed, that because it was prepaid they could only move the reservation to another night. Since I was now fairly certain that we would not be aboard another night, I asked if they could deliver it to our cabin.

 

The dining room manager told me that he would have to check with his supervisor who was in a meeting at that time, and would call our stateroom within 30 minutes. When he called back he took my order for two appetizers and entrees.

 

So that is how we closed out Monday. Me, in a bathrobe on the veranda eating both of our meals from the Pinnacle Grill while Pam wallowed on the bed in misery.

 

It was with a heavy heart that I finally accepted the reality that our cruising days were over, a mere 48 hours after it had begun.

 

 

To be continued…

Edited November 19, 2014 by Shellback801

[thetexasaggiecruiser]

What a cliffhanger! I can't wait to read what happened, I SO hope Pam was able to enjoy the cruise. We are on that itinerary in December - I love how you wrote up your impressions.

[Shellback801]

Thanks, I'm still writing but this story has a very happy ending. Pam fully recovered the following morning and didn't get seasick again. This was the first vacation we have taken where she was not looking forward to getting back to her dogs, garden, etc. She was definitely not ready to leave the ship.

 

As for me, I could have stayed aboard all winter.

[Cruising-along]

Oh my! Feeling so bad for your poor wife, but really enjoying your review. Can't wait for more. -- oh, just saw your last update, SO glad to hear it ends well!! :D

 

As for BB King, we were fortunate enough to have them on our Eurodam Baltics cruise last summer -- they are fantastic! Unfortunately for us, they weren't on the Westerdam in Sept-Oct. for our coastal cruise. Sure wish they had been.

[maxout]

Thanks, I'm still writing but this story has a very happy ending. Pam fully recovered the following morning and didn't get seasick again. This was the first vacation we have taken where she was not looking forward to getting back to her dogs, garden, etc. She was definitely not ready to leave the ship.

 

As for me, I could have stayed aboard all winter.

 

This always happens with DD, she has a 'HAL' of a time for the first 2 days and then recovers and is happy as a clam for the remainder of the cruise (as long as 30 more days) rough at first but all's well that ends well, eh? ;) :D

[kazu]

What a great review! So glad you enjoyed the tooting on the Westerdam especially with the discussion on another thread :)

 

Looking forward to the rest of the story. Well done :)

[IRL_Joanie]

Thanks for such an outstanding review of your time, so far, on your cruise:) It is great to read that Pam overcame the seasickness and was like myself, literally hating the thought of getting off the ship. I leave my claw marks on every corner as they carry me off any cruise ship:D

 

I am of the opinion, after reading your comments about your MDR dinner mates. The only thing is you will have to read it below. Thankfully for me, I do not fit into the 7 bad habits:) BUT, I do believe many are out there that do and thankfully they are few and I refuse to let them take me down!! HERE is the link: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/tamara-star/7-habit-of-chronically-unhappy-people_b_6174000.html

 

Joanie

Edited November 19, 2014 by IRL_Joanie

[Pia1913]

Thank you for the review and happy to hear Pam is OK. And of course you were fine. Uncle Sam took care of that a long time ago. ;)

 

I also thank you for info; we are on this cruise December 6th. Hope BB is still there. I still don't know what's in a weng weng, but for sure I'm not having any. :D

[PathfinderEss]

Thanks for your wonderful review, so glad everything worked out with your DW sea sickness. Glad you enjoyed the horns of the Westerdam.

[northstatefarms]

Presented with apologies for length.

 

Background

 

 

That was the worst meal I have had in recent memory.

 

 

 

To be continued…

 

I say that almost every time I've used the MDR in the past 3 cruises. More than a few of us never bother with the MDR anymore. The Lido offers most, if not all, of the same offerings. And we had room service for those special nights. People have different standards and expectations. I simply won't put up with poor service time and time again.

 

That said; HAL is still an enjoyable experience. And we now pack far fewer dress clothes.

 

Has your wife tried Bonine? I stopped using the patch and found Bonine works really well.

Edited November 19, 2014 by northstatefarms

[Shellback801]

Tuesday – San Juan/Panacea/Mofongo

 

Whether it was the combination of meds, her body simply adjusting to being on a ship, or both, Pam miraculously got her sea legs this morning. She would not become seasick again on this voyage. Her newfound vigor, boosted by the 22% additional oxygen available to us at sea level than at our mountain home, meant that I now had to keep up with her.

 

Which reminds me: Between the stairs, that wonderful promenade deck, and all of the walking we did ashore I actually lost a pound on this cruise. I clearly need to get out more.

 

We had breakfast on the veranda where Pam saw her first flying fish. Afterward, we ventured down to the Promenade to get a closer look at them before she dragged me off to yet another Master Chef function.

 

In fairness to Master Chef I thought they did a remarkable job, especially by making the “stars” so accessible to their adoring fans. On those occasions that I took a picture of Pam with one of them they were always genial and, in a few cases, even talkative. Their shows aboard ship were not bad, I suppose, for a guy who is much more into eating than cooking.

 

I recall saying on our roll call that I didn’t think the Master Chef cruisers would change the ship’s demographics all that much. I am now here to retract that statement. I think it was the guy in the yellow banana hammock by the Lido pool and blue thong in Half Moon Cay, the backwards-ball-cap-wearing production assistant in the MDR, and the gentleman sporting a top hat and overalls that ultimately changed my opinion. I am fairly certain that I saw a few scowling three and four-stars aboard.

 

We had lunch today in the MDR, the only lunch we had there during this cruise. I had the twice-baked potato soup and fish-n-chips while Pam had the (something) Sound Salad. We both thought it was very good.

 

Our only plan for Old San Juan was to take a leisurely stroll around Fort San Felipe and find a restaurant that served mofongo (which neither of us had tried before) before making it back to the ship for happy hour*.

 

We both agreed that San Felipe was very interesting and well worth the hike involved. I found the fort’s history to be fascinating. To get our mofongo card punched we happened along a restaurant and bar called The Parrot Club. Their version, in addition to the fried green plantains, butter, and garlic, also contained chicharrón (fried pork skin). Neither one of us were very impressed with the first bite. Pam called it “starchy.” It kind of grew on us a few bites later and we finished the plate. It was washed down with a Puerto Rican beer, of course.

 

The bartender described the regional varieties of mofongo around the island, including his favorite (his Mom’s), which had me wanting to try them all.

 

After happy hour we ventured up to the Crow’s Nest to watch the sun go down, then it was down to the Lido to hang out by the pool. In keeping with HAL tradition, we were in bed before the ship sailed at 22:00.

 

 

*You may count me among the fans of HAL’s happy hour. It was then that we established and reinforced friendships, got to know our bartenders, and got that all-important second (and fourth!) drink for a buck.

[pamssanity]

So sorry about your Pam's seasickness ( I'm a Pam too). We have cruised many times and I only had one bout of seasickness and it was on our Holland America Panama Canal cruise, but I was fortunate that the patch worked for me. If you ever decide to cruise again try one of the super large ships ( ie: Allure of the Sea). The stabilizers seem to make a difference.

[Floridiana]

Wonderful review. I am looking forward to the next installment.

[IndyDenise]

Love, Love this review!!!

[Shellback801]

Wednesday – St. Thomas/My Bartender Bromance/Le Cirque

 

I awoke just in time to see the pilot board to take us to anchorage in the harbor. There were six cruise ships in port, including us, and apparently only five berths. I thought us fortunate because 1) The view of Charlotte Amalie from anchorage was stunning, and 2) The tender dropped us off right by those touristy venues we wanted to see.

 

Our goals for the day were to hike 99 Steps and see Blackbeard’s Castle before having lunch at Ideal Restaurant, a local hole-in-the-wall noted for its authentic Trinidadian Rotis.

 

Pam was slow to wake so I had to bang around the cabin a bit to roust her. We eventually headed up to the Lido for breakfast where I was anxious to try Congee (thank you for the suggestion, M&B). I had seen it up there before labeled as “Rice Porridge” which did not interest me in the least. Now, with a new exotic name and country of origin, I had to have it. It was okay, I suppose, but rather plain. I do not remember if there were accompaniments to dress it up like in the photos I am looking at on Wiki right now so I might have dropped the ball there.

 

We made it to shore around 09:30 and started our hike up the hill, snapping away on the camera. It did not take us long to reach Blackbeard’s Castle, but when we arrived I had pretty much sweated out everything from yesterday’s G&Ts to this morning’s fresh squeezed orange juice*.

 

I did not relish the idea of paying $10 per person to listen to a guide play loose with history, have my picture taken with a “pirate,” or to walk up that “castle,” but as I peered around the corner I could see an outdoor bar, and on that bar sat a large container of iced tea.

 

I drank 20 ounces tea in about four seconds and followed that with an evil concoction called “Blackbeard’s Revenge,” their signature drink that I shared with Pam and drank at more measured pace. It is a blend of four or five different rums and a little fruit juice that does not taste remotely alcoholic. I would even call it “refreshing,” hence its danger.

 

Our tour continued in a different direction downhill and through a couple of old houses whose significance I cannot recall. As we neared the bottom we could smell curry. We followed our noses around the corner to Ideal Restaurant, which was every bit the hole in the wall it looked on Yelp.

 

Neither one of us were particularly hungry so we decided to split the $15 meal. I really wanted to have the goat roti because, you know, goat, but Pam prevailed and we ordered the conch. The Indian gentleman at the counter asked if we wanted mild, medium, or hot, which led to further debate. One glance at my sweaty, pale skin and he decided for us.

 

“I’ll make it mild,” he said.

 

It was wonderfully spicy and delicious, but I really could have gone for the medium heat. And the goat.

 

We caught a tender back to the ship around 13:00, showered and relaxed in the cabin before happy hour.

 

As we were chatting with our Favorite Bartenders in the World (I am hesitant to name them here or give the venue for fear that they might get in trouble, but rest assured I sang their praises on HAL’s official review) we struck up a conversation about the Philippines.

 

I visited the Philippines a number of times during the early and mid 80s when I was on a ship out of San Francisco. I have a marked fondness for the people, culture, and the food. As I was reminiscing, I mentioned how much I enjoyed San Miguel beer, and that it has been nearly 30 years since I have had one. One of my Favorite Bartenders in the World then walked over to the telephone, placed a call, and ten minutes later a guy shows up with six bottles from the crew’s mess.

 

I enjoyed ice-cold San Miguel there for the duration of the cruise.

 

This is as good a time as any, I suppose, to talk about the service we received on the Westerdam. Save for that one evening in the MDR (which had more to do with insufficient staffing than anything) the service was exceptional. Whether the stewards, servers, bartenders, front desk, even the “deckies” performing maintenance on the Promenade, we were always greeted with a smile and salutations. We were catered to every single day and wanted for nothing. Service is clearly HAL’s strong suit.

 

We had dinner tonight at Le Cirque. It was easily the best meal we had on this cruise and I got my lamb served the way lamb should be served. Of note was the crème brûlée. I admit to having reservations despite the fans on the HAL threads. I do not know if I have had better anywhere.

 

 

*Not that we are experts on fresh-squeezed orange juice, but I thought HAL’s was very good. I had read reports that it was watered down or had otherwise declined in quality, but it was certainly better than what we get at our local Einstein’s, and it was far superior to anything we get at the grocery store. I drank it every day.

 

 

To be continued tomorrow…

[keeponcruising]

Great review. I can't wait for the rest of the story:)

[sail7seas]

What a wonderful review. I've so enjoyed reading it, am happy Pam recovered from mal de mer and could enjoy the cruise. Thanks so much for your efforts in sharing with us. :)

 

Edited November 20, 2014 by sail7seas

[rkacruiser]

Thanks for your efforts! Enlightening and entertaining as well.

 

I really am glad that your wife was able to continue on the cruise. My, what you both would have missed otherwise!

[freestyling]

Appreciate the excellent review. I was getting concerned about Pam and your cruise getting cut short. Happy things took a turn for tthe better. My DW uses patches (one full day before getting on the ship) as well as wrist bands but it works for her :). Can't wait to read more.

[the2ofus]

Enjoyable, entertaining and enlightening! Thanks so much for sharing your experiences with us. How refreshing to discover the delight of first-time cruising once more. So glad Pam recovered in time to enjoy, and...dare I hope....become another cruise addict.

[Cruising-along]

Loving this review, thanks again!

[fm6175]

Cruise more often so i can read more of your reviews .

[Shellback801]

This always happens with DD, she has a 'HAL' of a time for the first 2 days and then recovers and is happy as a clam for the remainder of the cruise (as long as 30 more days) rough at first but all's well that ends well, eh? ;) :D

 

I read this response to Pam. She was heartened by it and is ready to set sail again. I may make her an honorary Shellback yet. Thank you.

[kensinsd]

I can't wait for your next installment.

 

My first cruise was on the Westerdam too, in October.

 

I see you have a very cool second cruise planned, how many days is that?

[Fatfish]

Thank you for a wonderful review as we ready to leave on the Westerdam in 2 days...I really need to find your bartenders....