Cruising with a child with autism

[perlotk]

51 minutes ago, blueridgemama said:

You might want to explore the new Key program. The most crowded times are the first day when there are large crowds. With The Key you would get priority boarding and priority disembarking. You would avoid the lines and crowds in the Windjammer for lunch on the first day and be able to have a quiet lunch in Chops and a quiet breakfast prior to disembarking. You would not have to stand in lines for the shows. It also includes internet. Just a thought😊

 

I hadn't heard of such a thing! I'll check it out, thanks!

[blueridgemama]

9 minutes ago, perlotk said:

 

I hadn't heard of such a thing! I'll check it out, thanks!

 

If it is available for your cruise it will be listed in your cruise planner with an explanation of the program and the cost per person. It's a relatively new program.

[perlotk]

1 minute ago, blueridgemama said:

 

If it is available for your cruise it will be listed in your cruise planner with an explanation of the program and the cost per person. It's a relatively new program.

 

$20 per person per day... a bit expensive if we all have to buy it! I am on the phone with RCI to see what they say, maybe only one person has to buy it.

[motherof]

I was on Anthem recently with my (adult) autistic daughter. First, the special needs muster was scheduled for midway through the early dinner seating (6:00 or 6:30, IIRC), so we opted out of it. Ours was in Wonderland, which was not packed. The worst part was waiting (and waiting, and waiting) for the no-shows. Really, anyone who chooses to make everyone else wait should be required to buy them a drink.  It wasn't overly crowded (maybe because of the no-shows?), and the seats were comfortable. She did wear her ear protectors, which helped a lot.

 

Lots of quiet spaces, and she found plenty of things to do and kept busy. The only areas she found stressful were around the Centrum/shops, which tended to be mobbed. She didn't attend any of the shows. I can attest that We Will Rock You is loud. Really good, but loud. And it has some strobe lighting, so anyone who is prone to seizures should skip it.

 

The MDR and cabin staff was wonderful - really looking out for her and ensuring that she had a great time. Overall, we had a fantastic cruise.

[ZandZ]

25 minutes ago, perlotk said:

 

They said the same to me when I talked to their special needs team. However, they did say that we would get priority boarding and that we could have a private muster drill. At least that's something!

I do not remember offers like these when I called them - that is great improvement on their part!  

[perlotk]

5 minutes ago, motherof said:

I was on Anthem recently with my (adult) autistic daughter. First, the special needs muster was scheduled for midway through the early dinner seating (6:00 or 6:30, IIRC), so we opted out of it. Ours was in Wonderland, which was not packed. The worst part was waiting (and waiting, and waiting) for the no-shows. Really, anyone who chooses to make everyone else wait should be required to buy them a drink.  It wasn't overly crowded (maybe because of the no-shows?), and the seats were comfortable. She did wear her ear protectors, which helped a lot.

 

Lots of quiet spaces, and she found plenty of things to do and kept busy. The only areas she found stressful were around the Centrum/shops, which tended to be mobbed. She didn't attend any of the shows. I can attest that We Will Rock You is loud. Really good, but loud. And it has some strobe lighting, so anyone who is prone to seizures should skip it.

 

The MDR and cabin staff was wonderful - really looking out for her and ensuring that she had a great time. Overall, we had a fantastic cruise.

 

This is awesome news - thanks for sharing. Did you disembark at any ports of call? Did they assist with that? I called RCI special needs and they basically said ports of call we need to go it alone, priority disembarking is not available for kids with autism. I feel so disappointed at that.

[motherof]

2 minutes ago, perlotk said:

 

This is awesome news - thanks for sharing. Did you disembark at any ports of call? Did they assist with that? I called RCI special needs and they basically said ports of call we need to go it alone, priority disembarking is not available for kids with autism. I feel so disappointed at that.

We had no problem with that. Even though we had some early tours and had to leave shortly after it was allowed, we never encountered any long lines. The worst line we had was when we returned about 15 minutes before the cutoff. And even that only took a few minutes. There are many screening stations, which helps. When we returned about an hour before cutoff, there were no lines. Same with debarkation at the end of the cruise. We did have a later debarkation time, which may have helped. But once our number was called, we were able to just walk off. Previous experience was on Enchantment and Grandeur, which involved a very long period of inching along the long walk between the holding area and customs. 

[perlotk]

8 minutes ago, motherof said:

We had no problem with that. Even though we had some early tours and had to leave shortly after it was allowed, we never encountered any long lines. The worst line we had was when we returned about 15 minutes before the cutoff. And even that only took a few minutes. There are many screening stations, which helps. When we returned about an hour before cutoff, there were no lines. Same with debarkation at the end of the cruise. We did have a later debarkation time, which may have helped. But once our number was called, we were able to just walk off. Previous experience was on Enchantment and Grandeur, which involved a very long period of inching along the long walk between the holding area and customs. 

 

This is great to hear, thank you.

[perlotk]

I don't know if anyone is interested, but I looked into The Key and thought it looked like it offered services perfect for people traveling with a child with autism, so I called up RCI special needs. He told me that The Key is a separate, pay program and if we wanted it, we'd have to buy it, did I want to talk to a customer service rep? I asked him how it differed and he said basically unless we are sailing with Autism of the Seas, they only provide priority check-in, private muster drill, and the ability to bring on non-perishable food. I asked about ports of call and he basically said, you're on your own there. He was sort of rude, actually, and not very helpful.

 

He transferred me to customer service, and I spoke with a lady who told me cheerfully that if I wanted to buy The Key, everyone in the state room over 5 would have to buy it (me, my husband and our 6 year old - our 4 year old would be free); for $420, it would fulfill everything we wanted that special needs services wouldn't cover. That the ship is one of the most popular and it does get crowded and our sailing week is completely booked up, so The Key would definitely help us get the most out of our vacation.

 

I asked if we could purchase it just for the adults, or only certain days. I asked if they could make any exceptions to assist with the fact that special needs services can't help us with not waiting in mile long lines for activities and food. She went off and spoke to her supervisor, came back 5 minutes later, and basically said no to all the questions. I said, "I'm not even on the ship yet and you're not giving me a really good impression of what it will be like," I said. She basically said "Sorry, I understand, have a nice day."

 

Please tell me staff on the ship is a little bit nicer...!

[cementhands]

I would recommend you ask for a handicapped room if available for the extra space especially in the bathroom. Of course you don’t want to take a handicapped room away from someone with wheelchair needs but sometimes handicapped rooms are given out to anyone. The extra space is significant.

Tea lights with batteries and night lights can add calmness to the room.

White noise machine with water noise feature can help with relaxation for your child.

Ear plugs and noise canceling headphones. Use prior to cruise to get use to them.

 

[Kerry's Girls]

6 hours ago, perlotk said:

Glad I came across this post. We are cruising for the first time on Anthem in April with our 6 year old son who has moderate autism. His main issues are crowds, noise and food. We are also bringing our 4 year old. 

 

I have read a lot of reviews here and on Trip Advisor who say that the lines and crowds on Anthem, especially during spring break, are terrible. The busyness will probably really bother him if that's the case, so now I'm sort of worried about it.

 

My biggest concern is about disembarking. My husband and I cruised 7 years ago and I remember getting off the ship took forever, we waited for at least an hour in line to get off in Jamaica.  How does priority work with disembarking? Do they let you get off first? Or is it more like last? 

 

What would you recommend we do upon arriving? My 4 year old really wants to do iFly, but I don't see that you can reserve it ahead of time. I've also heard the kids' clubs fill up fast, too, and that they split out 5-7 year olds from 2-4 year olds - I can't imagine my boys would want to be split up. 

 

This is not an Autism of the Seas sponsored cruise - I didn't know there was such a thing when we booked.  Thanks in advance 🙂

 

 

They will often age your special needs child down a group if you ask.  Don't make it about your kids wanting to be together, but that he would be more comfortable in the younger group (if that's true).  One of my daughters was often aged down - I would go and explain the situation.  They won't do it to keep siblings together, but they will for special needs.  That said, my typical daughter enjoyed having a bit of her own time in kids club away from her sister.  It was a nice break for her.  

[perlotk]

Just now, Kerry's Girls said:

They will often age your special needs child down a group if you ask.  Don't make it about your kids wanting to be together, but that he would be more comfortable in the younger group (if that's true).  One of my daughters was often aged down - I would go and explain the situation.  They won't do it to keep siblings together, but they will for special needs.  That said, my typical daughter enjoyed having a bit of her own time in kids club away from her sister.  It was a nice break for her.  

 

Good call - thank you. I'll try that!

[motherof]

One other thing - although my daughter had contacted Special Needs about the muster drill, and had been told they would put her in the special needs drill if one was offered, there was no indication of it when we boarded. We went to Guest Services (go early!), where we were given the option of leaving mid-way through dinner for the special needs drill, or attending the regular drill. Fortunately, the regular one worked for her.

[brillohead]

Keep in mind that it sounds like there are a few different muster options.

If your muster station is indoors, you probably won't have any problems at all -- go early so you have your choice of seating, have something to entertain/distract your child (phone/tablet/toy/whatever), bring ear protection (and headphones if using electronics with sound), and stay later so the crowd disperses.

If your muster station is outdoors, make arrangements ahead of time to go to the wheelchair muster station (and use the recommendations listed above for indoor muster).  I do not recommend doing an outdoor muster with anyone on the spectrum -- they are barely tolerable for the able-bodied and able-minded, and would be Dante's first, fourth, fifth, and seventh circles of hell for an autistic child.

If there is a "softer, gentler" special needs muster drill offered around 6:30, decide if that is something that your child will need, or if you can participate in the regular indoor/wheelchair muster and make that work for your family.

I've also heard stories of autistic kids being allowed to stay in the room to watch the instructional video on the tv with one parent while the rest of the family attends the regular muster -- this is something that was set up in advance and with RCI's permission.

You might have better luck emailing with Special Needs rather than talking on the phone, too.  That way everything is in writing, and your messages can be forwarded word-for-word to the ship's personnel, rather than a summary written by the person on the phone with you.  

(Did you get your Command Hooks yet? 🙂) 

 

[perlotk]

Awesome, this is helpful. I didn’t realize they’d let one of us stay in the room during muster. The noise would really bother him. Do you ask about this on board?

 

We decided to pony up the extra money to get The Key anyway (even though I still think special needs services ought to give priority disembarking, tender, etc.).

 

And yes — I bought my command hooks! Hahaha. Only 10 weeks early 😂

[brillohead]

58 minutes ago, perlotk said:

Awesome, this is helpful. I didn’t realize they’d let one of us stay in the room during muster. The noise would really bother him. Do you ask about this on board?

 

We decided to pony up the extra money to get The Key anyway (even though I still think special needs services ought to give priority disembarking, tender, etc.).

 

And yes — I bought my command hooks! Hahaha. Only 10 weeks early 😂

Note:  I've only HEARD STORIES OF the in-room muster being allowed -- no first-hand knowledge.  I would definitely try to set that up in advance with Special Needs, in writing, if at all possible.  Embarkation day is chaotic and crowded, and the line at Guest Services is going to be long.  *IF* you are able to get it set up in advance, I would get it in writing and make a couple different copies of it.  Then have one parent and child go to the regular muster with a copy of the letter explaining why the other parent/child isn't there, and also keep a letter in the room with the remaining parent/child to show to the cabin steward -- they'll check the cabins to make sure they're empty, so you'll want to be able to explain why you're not doing the regular muster.

Now you just have to remember to PACK your Command Hooks!  LOL  Did you decide to go with elastic, twine, twisties, or ???

 

[spookwife]

18 hours ago, perlotk said:

I don't know if anyone is interested, but I looked into The Key and thought it looked like it offered services perfect for people traveling with a child with autism, so I called up RCI special needs. He told me that The Key is a separate, pay program and if we wanted it, we'd have to buy it, did I want to talk to a customer service rep? I asked him how it differed and he said basically unless we are sailing with Autism of the Seas, they only provide priority check-in, private muster drill, and the ability to bring on non-perishable food. I asked about ports of call and he basically said, you're on your own there. He was sort of rude, actually, and not very helpful.

 

He transferred me to customer service, and I spoke with a lady who told me cheerfully that if I wanted to buy The Key, everyone in the state room over 5 would have to buy it (me, my husband and our 6 year old - our 4 year old would be free); for $420, it would fulfill everything we wanted that special needs services wouldn't cover. That the ship is one of the most popular and it does get crowded and our sailing week is completely booked up, so The Key would definitely help us get the most out of our vacation.

 

I asked if we could purchase it just for the adults, or only certain days. I asked if they could make any exceptions to assist with the fact that special needs services can't help us with not waiting in mile long lines for activities and food. She went off and spoke to her supervisor, came back 5 minutes later, and basically said no to all the questions. I said, "I'm not even on the ship yet and you're not giving me a really good impression of what it will be like," I said. She basically said "Sorry, I understand, have a nice day."

 

Please tell me staff on the ship is a little bit nicer...!

  you are basically wanting special treatment.    the ship offers the opportunity to pay for it, but you are unwilling to do that.   having a  SN  member of your party is irrelevant .    if you want to avoid lines  at ports, then wait  an extra 15-20  minutes for the first crush pop people to leave.  

 

as for avoiding lines elsewhere and when, again, everyone wants to do that.   this isn't Disney where you can request a DAS to  avoid  lines and extraneous waiting.    choose to dine at off times or use alternatives to the Windjammer.  

 

otherwise, book a Star class suite with a Genie who will be  much more able to provide you with  the special treatment you want.  

[spookwife]

1 hour ago, perlotk said:

 

 

We decided to pony up the extra money to get The Key anyway (even though I still think special needs services ought to give priority disembarking, tender, etc.).

 

 

ADA  only requires equal access, not  special or priority.  that's like  expecting all ECV and WC users to be first off the ship at ports.   I am not entitled to be  first off ahead of the crowds just because I use a WC.  

[perlotk]

1 hour ago, brillohead said:

Now you just have to remember to PACK your Command Hooks!  LOL  Did you decide to go with elastic, twine, twisties, or ???

 

 

I'll probably use those cloth hair ties - I use them for a variety of household things so I expect they'll hold... but of course it doesn't hurt to bring twist-ties.

[perlotk]

1 hour ago, spookwife said:

  you are basically wanting special treatment.    the ship offers the opportunity to pay for it, but you are unwilling to do that.   having a  SN  member of your party is irrelevant .    if you want to avoid lines  at ports, then wait  an extra 15-20  minutes for the first crush pop people to leave.  

 

as for avoiding lines elsewhere and when, again, everyone wants to do that.   this isn't Disney where you can request a DAS to  avoid  lines and extraneous waiting.    choose to dine at off times or use alternatives to the Windjammer.  

 

otherwise, book a Star class suite with a Genie who will be  much more able to provide you with  the special treatment you want.  

 

I did pay for it in the end. But I think it is false advertising to say "$19.99 per adult" and then consider a 6 year old an adult - which is mostly what I was mad about... but it's all good, I have chosen to move on.

 

I'll investigate alternative dining places, good idea, thanks.

[brillohead]

2 hours ago, perlotk said:

 

I'll probably use those cloth hair ties - I use them for a variety of household things so I expect they'll hold... but of course it doesn't hurt to bring twist-ties.

You can also hang a jingle-bell on the elastic... you'll hear it if it wiggles at all, and quieter, lighter-weight, and smaller to pack than a battery-powered alarm.

 

[parrotfeathers]

To OP (off topic).

Have you read the book House Rules by Jody Picoult?  If so, do you believe she managed to give an accurate representation of "life" with an autistic child?   I have decided I really don't care for her style of writing.  She tries to intertwine real knowledge through research with fictional stories.  There was something just a little "off" about it.

[blueridgemama]

2 hours ago, perlotk said:

 

I did pay for it in the end. But I think it is false advertising to say "$19.99 per adult" and then consider a 6 year old an adult - which is mostly what I was mad about... but it's all good, I have chosen to move on.

 

I'll investigate alternative dining places, good idea, thanks.

 

There is a really informative review of The Key on the Royal Caribbean Blog that will give you an idea of how the program worked for an actual cruiser. Just enter The Key in the search bar. 

[perlotk]

3 hours ago, blueridgemama said:

 

There is a really informative review of The Key on the Royal Caribbean Blog that will give you an idea of how the program worked for an actual cruiser. Just enter The Key in the search bar. 

 

Great - thank you!

[dddangerousdan]

Here is a link for cruising with autistic children.  https://autismontheseas.com/aots-community-network/strategy-services