Opinion on HAL Dress Code

[Golfette]

Ruth C - "jarring to the senses" seems a reasonable way to put it if one's senses are jarred by seeing someone in a blazer & tie rather than a dark suit and tie. J & T would be jarring to the senses, but I was not referring to J & T. As far as no one posting in actual words that it "ruined" their evening, the amount of posting on this subject leads one to believe that has a rather substantial effect, whatever the effect is.

 

bepsf, again, I am referring to someone wearing nice slacks, blazer & tie & lady wearing nice, fairly dressy dress, skirt or pants suit, not polos and khakis. Someone who is trying to adhere but just doesn't have a need for what constitutes "formal" wear. I agree that polos and khakis do not constitute proper dress for a formal nite.

 

I have a real question here. I am honestly trying to find out if people are truly bothered by someone (yes, I am being redundant) in nice slacks, blazer & tie or lady wearing nice , fairly dressy dress, skirt or pants suit.

Middleagemom - I couldn't agree with you more. Indeed the original poster of those words (or similar words) was not NonoNannette, but was a regular poster on these dress code posts who is very much in favor of enforcing the formal dress code. I believe his cousin or someone said them to him and he thought they were quite humorous. Surprisingly, as I recall, no one on the thread called him on it. Those thoughts are offensive any way you put it and have no place in a public forum.

[NoNoNanette]

Hi Golfette:

 

Karin knew that it wasn't me.....that I was just quoting another poster.

 

No worries, honey. :)

[DumDumDugan]

The posts made me sad, not angry. I found the attitudes expressed in the linked posts above to be hurtful, not necessarily to me, but to people in general. I was surprised both by the observations that were made, and the sources of the sartorial sentiments. I myself could so easily be classified as a "hideous blimp in the shower drapery." I suppose I'm naive, but I never realized before that my appearance, or anyone else's, could be the source of so much uncharitable merriment.

 

Mom - Don't think for a second that because someone wears a tuxedo that they necessarily have any class...

[NoNoNanette]

Mom - Don't think for a second that because someone wears a tuxedo that they necessarily have any class...

 

DumDumDugan :)

 

Try telling that to some of the VOCAL MINORITY on this forum! :rolleyes:

[DumDumDugan]

DumDumDugan :)

 

Try telling that to some of the VOCAL MINORITY on this forum! :rolleyes:

 

I know, I know. Clearly people get worked up about this issue.

 

I actually plan to get dressed to the nines on my upcoming cruise, and do tend to agree that in booking a HAL cruise you must know that you'll be expected to dress up a couple of nights. However,

 

1. To let some guy in a polo shirt ruin your night is ridiculous.

2. Making petty comments about the appearance of others shows everyone just how shallow you are.

[bepsf]

bepsf, again, I am referring to someone wearing nice slacks, blazer & tie & lady wearing nice, fairly dressy dress, skirt or pants suit, not polos and khakis. Someone who is trying to adhere but just doesn't have a need for what constitutes "formal" wear.

 

But making the choice to attend a Formal event in and of itself constitutes a need for formal attire at the event. One always has the choice not to attend.

If one chooses to attend but not to own, there are rentals available.

[AlohaPride]

But making the choice to attend a Formal event in and of itself constitutes a need for formal attire at the event. One always has the choice not to attend.

 

If one chooses to attend but not to own, there are rentals available.

 

And the rentals are so very lovely. Already in your cabin when you arrive. No need to have what you own pressed before the evening.

 

I think even if we DID own, DH would still rent :p

[Copper10-8]

........I have a real question here. I am honestly trying to find out if people are truly bothered by someone (yes, I am being redundant) in nice slacks, blazer & tie or lady wearing nice , fairly dressy dress, skirt or pants suit............

 

Nope

 

.....and referred to as "Biscuit Eaters" and "Blobs" ? (Something to that extent, anyway).....

 

Blimps

[RuthC]

I have a real question here. I am honestly trying to find out if people are truly bothered by someone (yes, I am being redundant) in nice slacks, blazer & tie or lady wearing nice , fairly dressy dress, skirt or pants suit.

I'm trying to state my views without being disagreeable about it (in this and all the pertinent threads. 'twould be nice if everyone tried, too).

No, I am not bothered when I see a man in slacks, blazer, and tie---he meets the code set by HAL. If it's good enough to meet HAL's code it's good enough for me. I am bothered by men wearing tank tops (seen it), ball caps (seen it), t-shirts (seen it), and the rest of the things that would be more appropriate at a cook-out (or the beach).

Now, women's clothing does get trickier, doesn't it. Usually what I think of as a "nice" dress, skirt, or pants suit isn't dressy enough to be classified as "formal" in any sense of the word. Perhaps your mental vision of "dressy" is different than mine?

I think of all the party clothes pictured in the Christmas catalogs. Those certainly qualify as "formal" for HAL. How much less than that a woman can go and still meet the definition is (obviously) the subject of endless debate.

[Cruising-along]

This (last paragraph) and this demonstrate how a few of the sartorially correct view those whom they feel don't adhere to a dress code. It also demonstrates how frequently jokes are made at the expense of others. I believe the posts in these links were made in jest, but they weren't kind. I took them to heart when they were written, and have pondered them ever since, because I too, am guilty of trying to be amusing at the expense of others.

 

I hesitated to post this today, because I don't want my words to be used as ammunition, nor to fuel further discord. The posts made me sad, not angry. I found the attitudes expressed in the linked posts above to be hurtful, not necessarily to me, but to people in general. I was surprised both by the observations that were made, and the sources of the sartorial sentiments. I myself could so easily be classified as a "hideous blimp in the shower drapery." I suppose I'm naive, but I never realized before that my appearance, or anyone else's, could be the source of so much uncharitable merriment.

 

If my post is in violation of Cruise Critic guidelines, then I understand if it is removed. My apologies for causing any further disturbance.

 

Karin

 

Karin thank you. I too was saddened and shocked by the hurtful post you cited. I find nothing humorous about laughing and making snide remarks about others' attire, weight, etc. etc. I wouldn't want to be in the dining room when that goes on, even if it wasn't directed at me, it would make me very sad to see it directed at others. :(

[RevNeal]

This (last paragraph) and this demonstrate how a few of the sartorially correct view those whom they feel don't adhere to a dress code. It also demonstrates how frequently jokes are made at the expense of others. I believe the posts in these links were made in jest, but they weren't kind. I took them to heart when they were written, and have pondered them ever since, because I too, am guilty of trying to be amusing at the expense of others.

 

I hesitated to post this today, because I don't want my words to be used as ammunition, nor to fuel further discord. The posts made me sad, not angry. I found the attitudes expressed in the linked posts above to be hurtful, not necessarily to me, but to people in general. I was surprised both by the observations that were made, and the sources of the sartorial sentiments. I myself could so easily be classified as a "hideous blimp in the shower drapery." I suppose I'm naive, but I never realized before that my appearance, or anyone else's, could be the source of so much uncharitable merriment.

 

If my post is in violation of Cruise Critic guidelines, then I understand if it is removed. My apologies for causing any further disturbance.

 

Karin,

 

As I have said, elsewhere on this board, my words which you have linked to were, indeed, in exceedingly poor taste and out of iine. I have expressed words of regret and apology for them, and to everyone whom I hurt with them; and I apologize, here, to you. I do not expect to be forgiven by some, but I did want to post this here.

 

This, combined with some of the similarly vicious remarks directed at me by others, has occasioned a reconsideration of my continued acivity on this board. It would appear that my judgment in posting has been impaired as of late; I regret this, and have no wish to hurt anyone anymore than I have. Hence, my activity is being curtailed to a minimum while I deal with myself.

[fcorey]

This (last paragraph) and this demonstrate how a few of the sartorially correct view those whom they feel don't adhere to a dress code. It also demonstrates how frequently jokes are made at the expense of others. I believe the posts in these links were made in jest, but they weren't kind. I took them to heart when they were written, and have pondered them ever since, because I too, am guilty of trying to be amusing at the expense of others.

 

I hesitated to post this today, because I don't want my words to be used as ammunition, nor to fuel further discord. The posts made me sad, not angry. I found the attitudes expressed in the linked posts above to be hurtful, not necessarily to me, but to people in general. I was surprised both by the observations that were made, and the sources of the sartorial sentiments. I myself could so easily be classified as a "hideous blimp in the shower drapery." I suppose I'm naive, but I never realized before that my appearance, or anyone else's, could be the source of so much uncharitable merriment.

 

If my post is in violation of Cruise Critic guidelines, then I understand if it is removed. My apologies for causing any further disturbance.

 

Karin

 

 

Karin I know what you mean, I am generally one of the "vocal minority" i guess, though i really dont care what other where. I try to dress appropriately and leave it at that. As for the comments... someone once said that I resembled Pavarotti with a receding hairline bad...granted it was a cousin trying to provoke a reaction...

 

Greg, we all make mistakes, I have never known you to behave in a manner with the intent to hurt someone's feelings. You were also quite nice when we met in person last year. This issue always seems to rear its head, and tempers flare a bit. The comments linked did surprise me a bit, though I hope you wont give up on this board. Its a community, with all sorts of people each with their own opinions and views. I would miss your posts should you curtail your involvement, you've always been a good source of information and humor.

[bUU]

The atmosphere is quite different when everyone looks at their best.

However "at their best" is a subjective judgment, without any clear consensus. I feel that people look their best when they're wearing clothing of varied styles and colors, as opposed to a repetitive array of b&w tuxedos. So for me, the atmosphere is "quite different" when there are a number of men wearing b&w tuxedos, in the same way I suspect the atmosphere is "quite different" for some other folks when there are a number of men dressed in suits of various styles colors, with shirts and ties of various styles and colors. Both sets of men are in full compliance with the dress code, but I think the colorful men look their best, while some other folks perhaps feel the b&w tuxedos look their best. If the objective is to achieve an atmosphere where everyone "looks at their best" then give up now, because there is no way to achieve that in the absolute.

 

And I believe this is a critical point. People do need to respect the preferences of others. That means complying with "the rules" surely, but not expecting anyone else to do anything other than comply with "the rules", i.e., not expecting anyone else to comply with your own personal preferences. I believe that outwardly expressing any negative sentiment, beyond simple personal preference, with regard to the choices other people make, within the context of their complying with "the rules", actively degrades the shared experience, with fault.

 

Beyond that, I fear that such expressions of such sentiments might even be the single most significant contributor to conflict in these threads. It is so much easier to dismiss (and ignore) a cavalier transgressor of "the rules".

[bUU]

What was the wordage from the Rev. and Friends last week? Overweight cruisers being laughed at and referred to as "Biscuit Eaters" and "Blobs" ? (Something to that extent, anyway) :(

You've got to be kidding me. I'm sure glad I was so delirious from the virus I was battling that I missed that. :mad:

[bUU]

But making the choice to attend a Formal event in and of itself constitutes a need for formal attire at the event. One always has the choice not to attend.

However, the definition of formal attire subject to interpretation, and each person deserves as much respect with regard to their interpretation as anyone else. The cruise line is our host, and sets forth the specifications for the dress code for formal night. Showing any overt disrespect towards any reasonable interpretation of the dress code is inexcusable. And I have seen a lot of messages posted which either indicate overt disrespect or a blanket refusal to grant that reasonable people could disagree with one's own personal interpretation.

[bUU]

As I have said, elsewhere on this board, my words which you have linked to were, indeed, in exceedingly poor taste and out of iine.

And the moderators have just removed at least one of them for you.

 

I have expressed words of regret and apology for them, and to everyone whom I hurt with them; and I apologize, here, to you. I do not expect to be forgiven by some, but I did want to post this here.

With respect, I think your apologies would be more effective if the need for them didn't recur.

[Happy HALer]

Please,

 

Less of this,

 

 

More of this,

[RevNeal]

With respect, I think your apologies would be more effective if the need for them didn't recur.

 

You are correct.

[prescottbob]

Ahoy!

 

Okay,:) that's settled. Time to move on. Life's too short.

 

"Let he who is not guilty of sin cast the first stone"

 

Onward and upward. LET'S CRUISE!

 

Bon Voyage and Good Health!

Bob:)

[jocelysue]

Ahoy!

 

Okay,:) that's settled. Time to move on. Life's too short.

 

"Let he who is not guilty of sin cast the first stone"

 

Onward and upward. LET'S CRUISE!

 

Bon Voyage and Good Health!

Bob:)

 

Ditto! Bravo! Let's have fun! Cruising is for enjoyment, not for carping!.

 

let's all play nice, O.K.?

[iancal]

Seems to be a lot of fashion and etiquette experts on HAL. Really looking forward to our first HAL cruise!

 

If any of you out there are not dressed according to Hoyle, as defined by one of these experts, you are very welcome to join us at our table. A few conditions though, don't complain about the cruise, don't pass judgement on what others are or are not wearing, bring a sense of humor and join in with some interesting conversation. We'll have a good time.

[NoNoNanette]

Seems to be a lot of fashion and etiquette experts on HAL. Really looking forward to our first HAL cruise!

 

If any of you out there are not dressed according to Hoyle, as defined by one of these experts, you are very welcome to join us at our table. A few conditions though, don't complain about the cruise, don't pass judgement on what others are or are not wearing, bring a sense of humor and join in with some interesting conversation. We'll have a good time.

 

YOU, iancal, are one of us..... the more SILENT MAJORITY! Dom and I would love to cruise with you....with that attitude.... anytime! :)

[iancal]

NoNoNanette...thanks, it's mutual. But my spouse now has a SERIOUS dilema. There are many, many Christmas catalogues. Which one should she refer to prior to packing? Macy's, Nortsrum, LL Bean, or Eddie Bauer? Problem number 2 is that we tend to toss them into the rubbish bin before they make it past the garage door. Do they by chance post outakes on the HAL website or do they have some catalogue pages pinned up outside the dining room so folks can double check prior to entering the inner sanctum? Since we are cruising in January, well past Christmas, is there a need to worry?

[NoNoNanette]

NoNoNanette...thanks, it's mutual. But my spouse now has a SERIOUS dilema. There are many, many Christmas catalogues. Which one should she refer to prior to packing? Macy's, Nortsrum, LL Bean, or Eddie Bauer? Problem number 2 is that we tend to toss them into the rubbish bin before they make it past the garage door. Do they by chance post outakes on the HAL website or do they have some catalogue pages pinned up outside the dining room so folks can double check prior to entering the inner sanctum? Since we are cruising in January, well past Christmas, is there a need to worry?

 

Well..... you might have to beg for assistance on this forum, my friend.

 

*sighing*

 

Off of the top of my head:

 

There are those in the extremely vocal minority who are probably jumping out of their skin to give your spouse their expert opinions. Never fear, they'll be here for y'all. :rolleyes: I'm astounded that I've been lucky enough to respond to you before the experts! HOTCHA! :)

 

Now... the "inner sanctum" is a funny place! I urge you not to cross the threshold. :) It is HIGHLY AMUSING, however to peek in from the outside and chuckle! (But, I can see that you've already figured that out);)

 

And finally.... to answer your question, "is there a need to worry?"...this poster will advise you NOT TO FRET. Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain, my friend. This isn't an issue.

 

One final thought... they eat their own, you know!

 

Be afraid. Be VERY afraid. :D

 

Happy Saturday, honey!

[LuvsDamships]

I voted to keep it the same because I like dressing up. I don't own a Tuxedo, but I do always dress in a black suit white shirt and dark tie on the formal nights. I prefer the change doing away with the informal night, but would prefer an extra formal night.

 

I don't have a problem with people who don't dress up. I would rather people "got along" with the expectations and dress "the part," but if some dont want to that's no skin off my nose.